This slide deck accompanies a quick introduction to Emotional Intelligence and successful business behaviours.
If you would like to view the YouTube LIVE virtual session, please visit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXcgp_G4icE&feature=youtu.be
Further free resources are available www.aproposltd.net/free
5. Situations & Coaching
• What situations do you find challenging?
• What is your current approach to these situations?
• Are there any specific beliefs that you have about
yourself and/or the situation that is preventing you
from behaving more assertively?
8. Different Forms of Intelligence
•Factual
•Linguistic
•Spatial
•Musical
•Practical
•Physical
•Intuitive (NQ)
•Analytical (IQ)
•Inter/Intrapersonal (EQ)
•Spiritual (SQ)
Sources include: H. Gardiner’s (Multiple Intelligence) & D. Goleman
9. Myths of Inter-personal Awareness
1. It means being ‘nice’ all the time
2. It’s about having your emotions on show all the
time
3. Women are more Emotionally Intelligent than men
4. You have a fixed level of Emotional Intelligence
throughout your life like IQ
10. Aristotle’s Challenge
Anyone can become angry – that is easy. But to be
angry with the right person, to the right degree, at
the right time, for the right purpose, and in the
right way – this is not easy.
ARISTOTLE, The Nicomachean Ethics
Sourced from Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman
11. Definition of
emotion
Emotion comes from the Latin Motere:
To move my consciousness
Useful Definition
Any agitation or disturbance of mind, feelings,
passion, any vehement or excited mental
state.
12. Interoception
BRAIN STATES
1. Pleasant
2. Unpleasant
3. Arousal
4. Calm
Northeastern:
Lisa Feldmann Barrett
https://lisafeldmanbarrett.com/academic-
papers/
The neurophysiology of interoception. Schematic simplification of the neurophysiology behind the cross-modal integrated (re)representation of the body status, otherwise known as interoception. Adapted from Craig (2008)
20. You have the
RIGHT to:
• Be yourself
• Choose your priorities and say no (or not now)
• Make choices without guilt
• Have your own opinions, views and ideas
• Express your views and opinions
• Make mistakes and change your mind
• Be illogical and give reasonable excuses if things go
wrong
• State you don’t understand
• Have needs and wants that may be different from
others
• Ask that others respond to your needs and wants
• Have others respect your rights
Source: Dr. Peter Honey
21. Human Interactions
PassiveManipulative
I’m OK
I’m NOT OK
You’re
NOT OK
You’re
OK
AssertiveAggressive
Source: Thomas Harris
TOO MUCH COURAGE
TOO MUCH CONSIDERATION
COURAGE & CONSIDERATION
• GUILT TRIP
• SULKING
• STONEWALL
• GASLIGHTING
COMPROMISE
COLLABORATION
SAY NO/NO DEAL
or NOT NOW, NOT TODAY
22. Conflict Modes: Thomas-Kilmann
COMPETITION
(I WIN. YOU LOSE)
COLLABORATION
(WIN-WIN)
ACCOMMODATION
(YOU WIN. I LOSE)
AVOIDANCE
(I DON’T CARE)
COMPROMISE
(SOMETIMES I WIN.
SOMETIMES I LOSE)
COOPERATIVENESS
ASSERTIVENESS
24. 6 types of
ASSERTIVENESS
Basic: I statement
Responsive: You statement (collaborate)
Empathetic
Discrepancy *
Negative *
Consequential *
* be aware of NOT
Manipulating others
29. Statements (tone)
1. I would like a refund please.
2. This work is not to a high enough standard for our team.
3. I would like to leave early as I have worked extra hours this week.
4. This food I ordered is not satisfactory.
5. You have stated that you would respond to my request 3 times and I now
need an answer immediately.
6. I haven’t heard back from you about my enquiry and I need an answer
today.
7. I don’t appreciate the way you are speaking to me: I find it abrupt,
slightly demeaning and rude.