These are some slides from a workshop session I designed and facilitated as part of a "Making an impact" Management Development Programme.

1. Questioning and Listening
Skills
Facilitated by Ian J Seath
© Copyright ISC 2013

2. Stephen Covey - Seven habits of highly effective people
SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND,
THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD
© Copyright ISC 2013

3. 4 possible communication styles
Attack,
Dominate,
Threaten
Inform,
Persuade,
Direct
Aggressive
Assertive
Passive
Responsive
Question,
Listen,
Summaris
e
Withdraw,
Silent,
Apologise
© Copyright ISC 2013

4. Characteristics
Assertive
Responsive
Inform
In Control
Convince
Persuade
Influence
Question
Explore
Summarise
Listen
Empathise
Aggressive
Passive
Dominate
Sarcastic
Patronise
Attack
Put down others
Dismissive
Apologise (for everything)
Withdraw
Sit on the fence
Keep the peace
Put down self
© Copyright ISC 2013

5. Assertive - Responsive
WIN / WIN
Relaxed
In balance with others
Eye contact
Non-threatening
Chooses influential position
Paced
Open posture
WIN / LOSE
Closed posture
Avoids eye contact
Out of balance with others - stand vs. sit
Erratic
Tense
Aggressive - Passive
© Copyright ISC 2013

6. Most people listen in order to respond; good listeners listen in order
to understand.
LISTENING SKILLS
© Copyright ISC 2013

7. Listening vs. Hearing

Animals and machines can hear; i.e. respond
to sensory inputs

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
Sheepdog following commands from shepherd
Voice recognition software on a PC
Only people can listen; i.e. interpret the
meaning behind words and react accordingly

“Can you pass me some water please?”
© Copyright ISC 2013

8. Listen and remember
%
Remembered
Start-up Effect
(Strong Introduction)
Recency Effect
(Strong Summary/
Ending)
Impact
Repetition
Time
© Copyright ISC 2013

9. Keys to effective listening





Find areas of interest
Judge content, not
delivery
Hold your fire
Listen for ideas
Be flexible in note-taking





Work at listening
Resist distractions
Exercise your mind
Keep your mind open
Capitalise on the fact that
thought is faster than
speech
© Copyright ISC 2013

10. Active listening

Behaviours which demonstrate active listening
include...






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An attentive posture, leaning forward, with uncrossed
arms (“open” body language)
Nodding your head
Smiling (genuinely)
Verbal cues (“Uh huh”, “I see”, “Yes”, “Go on”)
Making eye contact (but not staring)
Asking Reflective Questions
Taking notes
Summarising
© Copyright ISC 2013

11. Active listening

Confirmation and acknowledgement



Showing empathy





“Yes, I agree”
“Uh huh, I see”
“What you seem to be saying is…”
“So, you feel…”
“If I were in your position…”
“I understand your points…”
Appropriate Body Language

Open and positive
© Copyright ISC 2013

12. We pay 5 times more attention to the body language than we do to
the words.
HOW YOU ARE, IS AS
IMPORTANT AS WHAT YOU SAY!
© Copyright ISC 2013

13. © Copyright ISC
2013

14. “I like you
very much”
© Copyright ISC
2013
“Do you want to
come to my
party?”
“Fantastic
decision!”
“I think
you’re great
Ref!”

15. Questioning techniques



Open Questions
 What, Where, When, Who,
Why, How
 To get the candidate talking
and open up discussion
Closed Questions
 Did, Can, Was, Were, Is
 To confirm facts and close
down discussion
Probe Questions
 “Why did that happen?”
 “How did that affect you?”
 To get behind the first answer



Reflective Questions
 “You mentioned training, in
what way was...”
 “Challenging, how was that...?”
 Reflects back the candidate’s
answer and leads to a further
question
 Demonstrates active listening
Leading Questions
 “Do you prefer X or Y?”
 “You agree, don’t you?”
 Should not be used
Multiple Questions
 “What... & was...?”
 Should not be used
© Copyright ISC 2013

16. Remember...
“Prejudice is a great time
saver.
It enables you to form
opinions without having to
gather the facts.”
(Anon.)
© Copyright ISC
2013

17. Ian J Seath
Improvement Skills Consulting Ltd.
(November 2013)
ian.seath@improvement-skills.co.uk
07850 728506
@ianjseath
www.improvement-skills.co.uk