1. Hi everybody! (waves enthusiastically) Welcome back to my
attempt at an Asylum Challenge, The Jack Point Home for
Pedestrian Playables!
There’s not really anything to recap, since there’s not really any
plot in an asylum challenge. Our playable, Leila Shankel, is
currently a Mailroom Technician, and had to sleep in the dorm
because the cat was sleeping on her bed. Although Leila has a job,
she’s continuing at the asylum because it pays very well and may
even cover the surgery to implant fairy wings.
Everyone needs a dream.

2. Last time, we left off with Leila going to sleep in the dormitory.
But as I’m sure we all know, not all asylum residents sleep on the
same schedule. So while Leila, Flutterby, Dr. Ivanova, and Milton
all snoozed, Joe and Ernie the Spoon were disgustingly functional.
Ernie the Spoon didn’t even burn the mac & cheese.

3. Jay decided to go have a good stare at the wall for a while,
presumably in case it decided to do something interesting.
It didn’t.

4. Flutterby woke up around three a.m., and decided to attack the
couch again. The couch once again came through unscathed,
despite not having any back up this time around.
At this time, I would just like to point out that Flutterby does have
a scratching post -- she just ignores it.
Leila keeps getting negative aspiration points for Flutterby
scratching things, too.

5. I woke Leila up about five a.m. and then set her to feeding the
residents. First Flutterby…

6. …and then everyone else. I wouldn’t have advised placing the
instant meals on the floor, but it seems to work. Leila also set out
cereal, and even managed to eat some herself before heading off to
work.

7. After Leila left, the residents were left to their
own devices.
Apparently, at some point during their careers as
playables, someone must have learned to bow.
This new thing spent a fair amount of time
making its way through the household.
As you can see, Ernie the Spoon is already pretty
good at it.

8. That same morning, the trash can lid glitched in the “open”
position, since everyone throws the dishes away for some reason.
There’s a sink in the bathroom, but nobody ever uses it. Maybe the
managers of the Home provide paper plates and plastic cutlery so
nobody gets hurt…
Also, Joe and Jay spent a fair amount of time pillow fighting. In my
game, this seems to be something of a low-level flirt, but thus far
nothing has come of it… besides feathers all over the yard.

9. We saw our first potty dance on Day Two, but
the only actual accident was Flutterby again.
(Only to be expected when she has no litter
box, really.)
Ernie the Spoon cleaned it right up. Honestly,
my inm -- er, residents -- are so functional it’s
not even funny.

10. You may have noticed Jay taking a nap on the couch in the last
slide. It seems to be his preferred sleeping place. He is having bad
dreams about fireplaces, which simply proves that he has
pronounced psychological differences and needs to be in a nice
safe environment.
Everyone knows that dreams about elevators, tornados, and/or
shopping malls are the really scary ones.

11. The afternoon was spent in a variety of functional pursuits.
IVANOVA: Mr. the Spoon! You know I can’t work on my case
notes with you looking over my shoulder!
ERNIE THE SPOON (ignoring her): Aw, does Flutterby want a
snuggle? Yes she does! Oh yes she does! Snuggly kitty!
IVANOVA (writing furiously in her book): Ernie the Spoon has
recently exhibited a disturbing tendency to take orders from the
residential facility’s cat. This is a tendency shared by homicidal
paranoid schizophrenics like Son of Sam. He must be watched
closely!!!

12. JEFFINA: …Can I help you, Milton?
MILTON: Shhhhh.
JEFFINA: Why?
MILTON: (without moving his lips): If uee noof, they’ll hind us.
JEFFINA: (shakes her head and turns back to the paper)
Completely bonkers.

13. Ernie the Spoon even spontaneously got the mail.
I had no idea Sims could do that!

14. Leila brought a colleague home after work. I know this lady from
her interactions with one of the other playables in the Business
career, and she’s such an obsessive stalker that she probably
belongs in the asylum herself. I decided not to send her home right
away, since she stays around for so long, and comes over so often,
that she’s got to make friends with somebody.
Leila just used her to raise the ol’ Fun meter and then ignored her.

15. Leila’s colleague stuck around for a long time.
Long enough for some cracks to begin to
show.
MILTON (fretfully): Oh no! How could I have
not realized it before?
MILTON: Disco is the solution! But disco also
sends coded messages to the rabbits…
JAY (loudly): “Food, glorious food! We’re
anxious to try it!”*
*”Food Glorious Food,” from Oliver!

16. Fortunately, Leila was already on the job.
There are chairs, but everyone would rather eat standing up.

17. Leila managed a nice bath before she paid the
bills and went to sleep in her very own bed.

18. Where she proceeded to have some very interesting dreams of her
own. We shall have to see what we can do about that.

19. After Leila went to bed, there were multiple traffic jams in the
kitchen, mostly involving Jay and Jeffina. Somehow, though, they
managed to feed themselves just fine.
(grumbles) These Sims are too darn functional for an asylum!

20. There was a tree fire close to midnight. I thought perhaps we might
get in a death or two, or at least some amusing motive drops.
Instead, only Jeffina and Ivanova paid any attention. The tree
burned itself out, apparently without lowering either woman’s
motives too far, and nobody got anywhere near too close.

21. The ladies celebrated their narrow escape with a
belching contest, while everyone else complained
about Milton’s piano skillz -- or his lack thereof.
At this point, it got to be time for my weekly
backup, so I backed up the ’hood. After backing
up, I installed some new cc, played almost two
semesters of a Uni household, and came back to
the asylum.
Apparently, something I installed reset the ’hood.
I have no idea what it was, and I didn’t want to
play Uni again, so I kept going. How many points
do you think I should deduct?

22. Leila put the time to good use: cleaning, followed by a nice long
session with the mirror in pursuit of Charisma points.

23. During that early-morning bonus time, I noticed a
lot of sudden, dramatic, simultaneous aspiration
hits.
Based on Leila’s Wants/Fears panel, I’m guessing
everybody is afraid of Flutterby scratching stuff.
I’m not sure why, since the couch seems well able
to hold its own.
Still, I suppose that Fear makes things more like
an asylum.

24. We had our first tears over aspiration later in the morning.

25. Leila went off to work in the morning, leaving instant meals on the
floor and cereal on the counter again.
I was initially not sure about leaving food on the floor, but it seems
to work well when nobody’s bothered to feed the cats for a while,
so we’ll let it go.

26. The problem, of course, with serving lots of
instant meals in a house with only one toilet is
that they lead to the potty dance being
performed on a regular basis.

27. Although the only actual potty accident during the day was
Flutterby’s.
I’m not sure if you can call it an “accident” when she doesn’t have
a litter box. But then, she could always just go outside…

28. Now, one of the new pieces of cc I installed
was a new “kiss cheek” interaction. It’s a non-
romantic interaction, and I though it would
make a nice substitute for the “Kiss Kiss
Darling” interaction from Apartment Life that I
don’t have. It too spread like wildfire.

29. MILTON: I said “Don’t touch me!,” man! I am military trained,
which means my whole body is a deadly weapon and I will defend
myself with lethal force.

30. Neither Joe nor Milton was particularly happy
about that last encounter, although they dealt with
their feelings in different ways.
JOE: Don’t worry, Milton! I’ll save you! (makes
“swimming” noises, then, in falsetto) Oh, Joe!
You saved me! How can I ever thank you?
MILTON: And if you keep bothering me, I’ll
show you what the hat is for! (calling after an
imaginary person who is running away) Yeah,
that’s what I thought!

31. When Leila got home, her portrait was the same color as her
plumbbob, which was the worst-looking portrait of anyone in the
asylum including the cat.
Although that may not be fair, as I’ve noticed that cats are pretty
good at keeping themselves happy in general.
The three meters most affected were Bladder, Fun, and Social.

32. The chess table was in use, but fortunately the bathroom was free.
Leila doesn’t have a high enough relationship with anyone yet for a
quick game of Red Hands, and watching TV has no career benefit.
MILTON (sings, badly): I’m too sexy for this residential facility for
people with psychological differences, too sexy for this residential
facility for people with psychological differences…

33. So I decided to have Leila do some networking. Normally that
would not raise anyone’s Fun meter…

34. …but it all really depends on who you’re networking with, doesn’t
it? And what form that networking takes?
Water balloon fights don’t raise the Fun meter anywhere near as
much as they should (based on my childhood memories), but they
raise the Social meter quite nicely, and build relationships quickly
so that you can switch to Red Hands sooner than you might
otherwise manage.

35. Ernie the Spoon made himself dinner, which he ate in company
with Milton.
MILTON: The thing about the rabbits is that they’re all telepathic
ninja masters. See, the telepathy wouldn’t be so bad if they were
just kind of normal, and the ninja thing wouldn’t be so bad if they
couldn’t tell what you were going to do in advance…
ERNIE THE SPOON: …But both of them together? I completely
understand!
Apparently, randomizing personalities worked. Ernie the Spoon
used to have zero Nice points, but now he seems to have at least
nine.

36. LEILA (awkwardly): Well, thank you for coming over.
ABHIJEET: Oh, my pleasure!
LEILA: I thought that maybe you wouldn’t want to hang out
somewhere that has a lot of, um…
ABHIJEET: Loonies? They’re harmless. Some of them are even
interesting. And then there’s the caretaker.
LEILA (blushing): Oh, I’m not any kind of an attraction! But I’m
glad you’re okay with coming over sometimes. I like you.
ABHIJEET: I like you too. So maybe you’ll be okay with this,
then.
LEILA: With what?

38. Leila floated through the rest of the evening, and didn’t even mind
having to sleep in the dormitory again.
But, as I believe I have mentioned before, not everybody sleeps at
the same time in this asylum, so let’s see what else went on.

39. For starters, Ivanova became our first human potty accident.

40. Which was followed by our very first visit from the Shrink.

41. Milton had a sudden brainwave and discovered
the joy of chess.
MILTON: Mind if I join you?
ERNIE THE SPOON: Help yourself.
MILTON: …Hey, could you talk?
ERNIE THE SPOON (eagerly): About the Word
of Cheese?
MILTON: I don’t care. I just want to listen to you
speak.
ERNIE THE SPOON: Oh, okay. Well, let me
enlighten you…

42. When Ernie the Spoon decided it was time to go to bed, Milton had
a little trouble coping.
MILTON: Bed? Do you need company? No, no! Don’t ask, don’t
tell!* The rabbits will get you if you’re bad! Think of the children!
*Note for my non-American readers: Until late 2011, any member of the U.S.
Military who was found to be gay was dishonorably discharged. The official
policy, beginning in 1993, was “Don’t ask, don’t tell”: don’t ask a soldier if
they’re gay, and if you are a gay soldier, don’t tell anybody. Because lying and
being afraid build unit cohesion, apparently?

43. And in the process became our second recipient of a visit form the
Shrink.
JOE: IIIIIIII don’t know about this whole “acting like a chicken”
thing. (mutters) The things I’ll put up with for people.

44. Talking to Dr. Shrink helped a lot -- sympathetic colleagues are
always wonderful resources -- but Ivanova Doctor was still the
second person to go into aspiration failure.
IVANOVA (coquettishly): Oh, Renaldo! You always know what
do say! (huskily) Now give me an Italian glance!

45. I thought there might be a fire about that time, but no such luck.
To tell you the truth, I’m a little fond of Milton, so I’m just as glad,
really.

46. Shortly thereafter, Milton went into Aspiration Failure again.

47. I may as well point out here that Milton is the
world champion Aspiration Failurer. It’s one
of the reasons I like him.
MILTON: Woo hoo hoo hoo -- Staying alive!
Staying alive!

48. I have no doubt that it’s Flutterby’s fault. It seems like everyone is
often afraid of her scratching something, and Milton apparently
never has that Fear not in his panel.
If that made sense.

49. Having Flutterby in the asylum makes me wonder
how anyone plays an asylum without a cat. I
mean, without a cat, who piddles on the floor so
often? And who spends hours on the one work
surface in the kitchen, forcing the in -- the
residents to make single servings of toaster
pastries instead of serving Grilled Cheese for
everyone?
ERNIE THE SPOON (mutters): Thwarting the
Will of Cheese is not a good idea, kitty.

50. Throw in another visit from Dr. Shrink and
another instance of the pee-pee dance, and I’m
sure you can see why Leila is eager to get to work
in the morning.

51. Leila is now an Executive Assistant; I believe I forgot to mention
that yesterday. I’m a secretary myself, and all I can say is that the
programmers obviously never worked with or knew any admins, or
they wouldn’t have made the Exec position so low on the career
ladder -- or so poorly paid!
And poor Leila will probably be there for a while: it was at this
point I realized that I had the harderjobs hack from MATY in when
I started the asylum. I intend to pull it when playing Leila’s sister,
as her challenge ran for two generations without and putting it in
this late in the game isn’t fair. However, by the same token, it was
in when Leila started and leaving it out would also be unfair. (sigh)
I guess I’ll be playing musical hacks for a while.

52. While Leila was away, Ivanova shows that she’s just as intelligent
and highly educated as any “real” doctor out there.
IVANOVA: My stomach huuuuuuuurts! And I’m all dizzy and
crabby and I’m kind of shaky too!

53. IVANOVA: I think I’ll give Joe a kiss. That’s always helpful when
you’re having stomach issues.

54. IVANOVA: And then a nap. That’ll sort me out.

55. Jay brought the bills in spontaneously, so apparently this is nothing
to marvel at.

56. And pillow fights really aren’t anything to marvel at either -- but
they can be fun to watch. Especially when one participant is
wearing the most embarrassing underpants in the entire Maxis
catalog.
JAY (laughing): “Everybody was kung-fu fighting! Those cats
were fast as lightning!”*
*”Kung Fu Fighting,” recorded by Carl Douglas

57. And I was so busy watching the pillow fight that I completely
missed whose puddle this is.
The feet are Milton’s, but I followed him up the stairs, and the
puddle was already there when he got to the top.

58. I was wondering if Milton was trying to find Ernie the Spoon.
Perhaps he was, but they passed on the stairs as Mr. the Spoon
went to answer the phone.
ERNIE THE SPOON: No, we don’t need any insurance, thank you.
But have you heard the Word of Cheese?

59. When Leila got home, she nabbed the shower and the potty before
setting to work on her ticket out of there.
LEILA: …And that is why I am particularly in favor of
significantly larger plumbing budgets for residential facilities for
persons with psychological differences.

60. After paying the bills and doing a little cleaning -- okay, doing a lot
of cleaning -- Leila managed to go to sleep in her own bed, where
she dreamed of her favorite uncle.

61. Perhaps fortunately, Leila did not have to worry about serving
dinner. I don’t know who took care of it, and I don’t know what
they made, but judging by Joe’s breath, whatever it was involved a
lot of garlic.

62. I find it amusing to try and guess how everyone’s
personality randomized, and apparently Milton is
fairly Neat. It also seems that Joe is pretty high in
Obsessive points.
JOE: Are you done yet, Miltie?
MILTON: Nope.
JOE: How about now?
MILTON: Nope.
JOE: Now?
MILTON: Joe, as long as you are following me, I
will never be done. Now get out of here before I
put these gardening shears through your throat.

63. Milton apparently had a shower after gardening, but perhaps he
would have been better off staying stinky.
JOE: Well, hello there, Mr. Smexy!
MILTON: I can’t heeeear you!
…Of course, I wouldn’t be at all surprised to find out that Joe is
Turned On by Stinky People.

64. Let’s look at the daily routine of the asylum:
breakfast on the back porch.
JEFFINA: Oh, I’m so miserable!
ERNIE THE SPOON: That’s because you’re not
having any Cheese Doodles in milk. Breakfast of
champions.
Figuring out who has at least some Neat points.
Ivanova must have more than two, I think, to
clean up other people’s cereal bowls.
Or Cheese Doodle bowls, as the case may be.

65. Piddling on the floor, attacking the couch, and
talking to Dr. Shrink about how all the violence is
affecting your fragile psyche.

66. Making new friends, enhancing pre-existing
friendships, and of course making your own
entertainment.

67. On Day 5, Leila came home with a demotion, thanks to a bad
chance card. I’d be willing to bet that the harderjobs hack had
something to do with that, too.
I can’t believe I was dumb enough to install that before starting an
asylum! Gah!

68. Leila came home in a very bad mood, with an especially low Fun
meter.
LEILA: You will? Really? Great! I’ll see you then!
Fortunately, she has a secret weapon.

69. And his name is Abhijeet.
Seriously, without this guy to come over for a date, Leila would be
consulting with Dr. Shrink more than any of the inm -- residents.

70. In fact, despite the demotion, it was a pretty good day for Leila.
Not only did she have a date with Abhijeet, but Ivanova handled
the grocery delivery.
IVANOVA: You know, I think your pathological need to bring
things to people stems directly from a deep-seated fear of rejection.
GROCERY DELIVERY GIRL: Riiiiiiiight. You take care now.
You’ll notice Leila’s plumbbob there in the picture? Ivanova
accepted the groceries 100% autonomously. There’s so much I had
no idea Sims were capable of doing on their own!

71. Ernie the spoon even served dinner, allowing Leila to sleep in her
own bed.
This asylu -- this residential facility for people with psychological
differences is being awfully functional…

72. Now that’s more like it!
MILTON: I know you’re in league with the rabbits, Joe!
Everybody knows that the pink ones are the worst, and here you
are, doing their nefarious bidding!

73. JOE: Well, we’ll show him, won’t we, Jay? We’re having lots of
fun over here! Without that BOZO with the military face paint!
Aren’t we, Jay? HA! HA! HA!
Joe seems to be taking it hard.

74. Come morning, we had our first fire.
I wouldn’t have minded too much, except that Leila was in the
kitchen, and if your playable dies in a fire, that’s it -- game over.
Fortunately, Leila knows her way around a fire extinguisher, and it
was put out in good order.

75. It did lead to an amusing game of Count-The-
Asipration-Failures for everyone else in the
kitchen.

76. But Jay wins this competition on style points, I
think.

77. Ernie the Spoon recovered first, and spent much
of the afternoon playing kissy-face with Flutterby.
I vote that we don’t tell him where Flutterby’s
face has been. Who’s with me?

78. Jay’s eventual recovery seemed more lasting than
Mr. The Spoon’s, though.
Perhaps somebody gave him the bad news about
Flutterby?

79. He did eventually pull himself together enough to play a game of
chess with Abhijeet, although this may have something to do with
the “Spread the Word of Cheese” Want he probably has perma-
locked.
I assume there is such a Want, anyhow. I don’t look at the, er,
resident’s panels.
ABHIJEET: So is Leila going to be very long?
ERNIE THE SPOON: Patience, brother. Patience. With Cheese, all
things are possible.

80. ABHIJEET (V.O.): But I’m only asking if she’s going to be in the
bath a long time. I can come back if she is.
ERNIE THE SPOON (V.O.): Time is relative, brother. For
instance, if I were to make you a nice grilled cheese sandwich right
now, you wouldn’t notice if she spent two hours in the tub. On the
other hand, if I were to show you the gooey goodness that is a
grilled cheese sandwich but withheld it from you, even a five-
minute shower would seem an eternity.
ABHIJEET (V.O.) (sighs): So what kind of cheese are we talking
about?

81. LEILA: Thank you so much for coming over again! It helps a lot to
have someone I can unwind with!
ABHIJEET: Any time. Glad to be of service. You know, I -- Er,
where is Milton going?
LEILA: Oh no… Milton! Milton, not the garden again!

82. And so, while the inm -- residents made concerted efforts to set the
place on fire again…

83. Leila managed to bunk down in her own bed. Which is about as
much success as one can hope for in this challenge, I think.
And that’s probably as good a place to stop as any.

84. Score
Base score: 100
Minus number of days in the asylum: -6
Total: 94
Running totals
Fires: 1
Potty accidents: 6
Sponge baths: 0
Aspiration failures: 14
Shrink visits: 3
Pass outs from exhaustion: 0
Deaths: 0

85. Notes from esmeiolanthe
This chapter is unusually long for me, and includes some different
formats on the slides. Please let me know what you think of both
the length and the slide layouts. (I’m personally liking the layouts,
but not liking the length quite as much.)
I hope you weren’t too bored, and I hope you will join me next
time for more asylum madness psychological difference. Until
______
then, Happy Simming!