Slides from Presentation by Sister Edith Bogue at the November 2016 meeting of the Benedictine Oblates of St. Scholastica Monastery in Duluth, MN. One in a series of presentations on the Hard Sayings of St. Benedict, drawing its inspiration from the twin commands to neither defender nor complain about the others in the community.

1. Dissing and Defending:
Hard Sayings of St. Benedict #3
Sister Edith Bogue
Duluth Benedictine Oblate Meeting
13 November 2016

2. 2
DISSING
PopeFrancis,Angelus,16Feb2014
http://images.scribblelive.com/2015/1/20/73616809-5a43-41c6-ac03-985640cdedf0_500.jpg

3. 3
Dissing?
http://goingconcern.com.s3.amazonaws.com/uploads/2011/10/loser-150x309.jpg
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/diss

4. 4
Dissing in Modern Culture
 Frequently featured in TV and movies
 Key element of celebrity news
 Seen as a skill that can be learned
 People carefully craft and practice the
delivery of their disses
 Dissing competitions occur
• Some with cash prizes
• Both in person and online

5. 5
HowToDissSomeone,wikiHow
http://www.wikihow.com/Diss-Someone

6. 6
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybDzFVWn7So&ab_channel=MrNarwal123

7. 7
Whataresomegooddissesorinsultsicansaytosomeonewhoisbullyingme?
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080909164140AAMJiSA
Answers to the
question,
"What are some
good disses or
insults I can say
to someone
who is bullying
me?"
About 6 answers later,
someone says, "Maybe
this will make it worse.
"

8. 8
St. Benedict's View
 In the Prologue of the Rule, mastery of the
tongue is the first key to following Jesus:
 "And the Lord …says again: Who is it who desires
life, and longs to see good days? (Ps 34:12) And
if you… respond, “I am the one!” God says to
you: “If you desire true and everlasting life, keep
your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking
deceit. Turn aside from evil and do good; seek
peace and pursue it." (Psalm 34:13-14).
RuleofSt.Benedict,translationbyFr.LukeDysinger

9. 9
The Tools of Good Works
 Ch 4.39-40: "Not given to murmuring or to
speaking ill of others (Wis 1:11)."
 Ch 4.51,53: "To keep custody of one’s
mouth against depraved speech, not to
speak words that are vain or apt to provoke
laughter (cf. 2 Tim 2:16)."
http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/uploads/features/images/310x208/holdyourtonguesculptureslrg.jpg

10. 10
Ch 5: Restraint of Speech
 St. Benedict is not praising silence. This chapter
focuses on the danger of speech, and limits it.
 On account of the importance of restraint in
speech, let permission to speak be seldom granted
even to perfect disciples, … for it is written: In
speaking much you cannot avoid sin (Prov 10:19);
and elsewhere Death and life are in the hands of
the tongue (Prov 18:21).
 But as for ridiculing or otiose words which induce
laughter, we permanently ban them in every place;
neither do we permit a disciple to open his mouth in
such discourse.

11. 11
Humility and Speaking
 In the early stages of humility, Benedict
repeats his emphasis on restraint of speech.
 In the 11th step, he describes the positive or
good use of speech: for communication:
 The eleventh step of humility is that when
speaking the monk does so gently and
without laughter, humbly and with gravity,
speaking few but reasonable words, and that
his voice is not clamorous: as it is written, A
wise man is known by his few words. (The
Sentences of Sextus 145)

12. 12
Distinguish Criticism
from Correction
http://images.slideplayer.com/28/9379124/slides/slide_16.jpg

13. 13
 With a grace-filled reaction. We must lead our heart and not follow
it now. Pause, take a deep breath and fight for a gracious response.
 Resist being defensive. Being argumentative now is not wise. Your
heart will lie to you until God overrides it with loving truth about
your condition.
 Lean in and learn. Not every correction is completely true but
nearly all have a kernel of truth. Sifting the words to God for
confirmation is key. Wise people allow correction to grow them and
change them.
 Lead even in correction. We cannot lead others to places we have
not gone. Receiving correction with wisdom and humility is a
powerful example at home or at church.
FourTipsonHowtoAcceptCorrection
https://www.namb.net/flourish-blog/four-tips-on-how-to-accept-correction/

14. 14
Individual or Communal?
 Benedict explicitly shows concern for the
individual soul. His Rule creates a setting in
which virtue is easy and sinning difficult.
 He also sees and cares for the web of
relationships. He recognizes the harm done
to the common life by broken relationships
and hurtful speech.
http://www.motherearthnews.com/~/media/Images/MEN/Editorial/Articles/Magazine%20Articles/1981/11
-01/Mothers%20Community%20Network/072%20community%20network%20-%20rikilo%20-%20fotolia.jpg

15. 15
Pope Francis: CommunionPopeFrancis,ApostolicLetterforYearofConsecratedLife,adapted.
https://w2.vatican.va/content/francesco/en/apost_letters/documents/papa-
francesco_lettera-ap_20141121_lettera-consacrati.html#_ftn6
I am hoping that the “spirituality of communion” will become a
reality and that you will make "the Church the home & the school
of communion."
…Communion is lived first and foremost within the communities
of each Institute. So I ask you to think about my frequent
comments about criticism, gossip, envy, jealousy, hostility as ways
of acting which have no place in our houses.
This being the case, the path of charity open before us is almost
infinite, since it entails mutual acceptance and concern, practicing
a communion of goods both material and spiritual, fraternal
correction and respect for those who are weak … it is the
“mystique of living together” which makes our life “a sacred
pilgrimage.” … How can we enable each member to say freely
what he or she thinks, to be accepted with his or her particular
gifts, and to become fully co-responsible?

16. 16
DEFENDING
FromwikiHOW,DefendYourselfFromBullies,
http://www.wikihow.com/Defend-Yourself-from-Bullies

17. 17
Chapter 69
 This Chapter is purely St. Benedict's own
writing; it does not draw on any sources.
 Notice the strong terms: every, any, even, most
 "Every precaution must be taken that no one in
the monastery presumes on any occasion to
defend another monk or to act as his protector,
even if they are closely related by some sort of
blood ties. The monks must not presume to do
this in any way whatever, because from it may
arise the most grievous occasions of scandals. If
anyone transgresses this, he is to be severely
punished."

18. 18
Chapter 70
 Immediate following the presumption of
defending is the rejection of punishment
So as to avoid in the monastery every occasion
of presumption, we decree that no one has the right to
excommunicate or strike any of his brothers, unless he
has received power do to so by the abbot. For sinners
are to be reproved before all, so that the rest may have
fear. (I Tim. 5:20)
4
Children, however, up to fifteen
years of age are to be kept under diligent and watchful
discipline by all: yet this too is to be done reasonably
and with all measure.
For if anyone without precept from the abbot
presumes authority over those who are above that
age, or if he acts towards children without discretion,
he is to be subjected to the discipline of the Rule; for it

19. 19
“Let no one be disturbed…”
 St. Benedict’s thinking here is clear. He is
pursuing the same goal through two paths.
• The good of the individual monastic:
oWhat to avoid doing
oWhat to do (much of the rest of the Rule)
• The good of the community as the workshop
in which we go to God
oNot creating the “occasion of sin”
oPatience is promoted so that one person’s failing
does not become a poison to all

20. 20
DIVISIONS IN THE CHURCH
http://cdn.cnsnews.com/images/o-POPE-FRANCIS-facebook.jpg
“The divisions make you see only this
part, and the other part is opposed
to this: always opposed, there is
no oil of unity, the balm of unity”.

21. 21
Meditation of Sept 12, 2016
 “But “being naive, we are playing [the devil’s]
game”, Pope Francis said, adding: “And I will
say more about war: the war of divisions is a
dirty war, it is like terrorism. Let us look at a
clear example: when in a Christian community
— be it a parish, college or institution,
whatever it may be — you gossip, you drop a
bomb to destroy the other”; and in this way
“the other is destroyed” but “I am fine, and I
can continue”. This is “the terrorism of
gossip!”. The Pope pointed out that the
Apostle James “also said: the tongue kills; it
drops a bomb, therefore, it destroys”, while “I
remain”.

22. 22
 Discerning carefully our cultural inputs
 Working on offering correction with as much
love and care as possible.
 Working on receiving correction for growth.
 Avoiding “dissing” in all its parts.
 Care the mood of the group. Not fake, but
always giving as much cheer as you can.
 Refusal to step into factions. Living this is a
difficult art, worthy of much effort.

23. 23
Your Turn
 Times that correction or defending did not
go well.
 Reflections on the readings.
 Reflections on the conference.
 Refreshments!