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Vol. 45 January 21, 2020 Number 3
Ministering to the Grieving
Steve Higginbotham
Through the years, I have stood at the head of many caskets, and I have heard
many comments made to grieving families that made me cringe. While the intent was
not to harm or add pain, in reality that is what they did. Like Job’s friends, they would
have better served as comforters if they would have just remained silent.
I think most people share a common fear of saying the wrong thing to one who
is grieving, or simply not knowing what to say. Because of this fear, we often withdraw
from people at a time when they need us the most. The apostle Paul said that since the
God of all comfort comforts us in our tribulation, then we should comfort others (2
Corinthians 1:3-4). The following suggestions are offered in hopes of equipping us so
that we may effectively minister to those who are grieving.
Give them your presence. Don’t allow a person to suffer alone. Understand
that you don’t have to say anything. Just be there. A hug; an expression of sorrow; and
a reaffirmation of your love for them is all that you need to say. Your presence is what
will be remembered and treasured, not your words.
Don’t stress over words. No words can fix the situation, so drop the burden of
feeling you must come up with the “perfect thing to say.” There is no sage advice to
offer at this moment that if they do this or that, it will all be better.
Be there when the dust settles. We often inundate the grieving family with
support during the immediate time of loss, but who is ministering to this family two
months later? Determine to be the person who is ministering two months, four months,
six months after the funeral.
Remember dates. Mark your calendar and make note of birthdays,
anniversaries, and especially the anniversary date of the person’s death. I assure you
that the anniversary of a person’s death will not be overlooked by loved ones we are
left behind. Let the grieving know that we remember too. Such remembrances are
treasures by those who are grieving.
Do good. Don’t simply offer to do good, actually do it. Sometimes we find
ourselves saying, “If there’s anything you need, just let me know.” This offer may
salve our consciences, but it is rings hollow and is an offer that will rarely be acted
upon. Instead, if you really want to offer your help, say something like, “Would you
rather me run to the store and get some groceries for you, or would you rather have me
do the dishes for you?” This wording is much more likely to receive a positive
response and allow you the opportunity to minister.
Let people grieve. A widow once told me that whenever she started to cry, a
close relative would tell her to stop crying and be strong. Don’t encourage a person to
--article continued page 2--
ELDERS
Mike Childers..............397-6453
Dennis Hallmark .........255-5557
Mark Hitt.....................322-0917
Bobby Lindley.............260-9193
DEACONS
Wade Bryan.................419-5552
William Harris.............416-8149
Ricky Lindsey .............255-8136
Jeff Mansel..................871-0357
Jimmy Spearman.........840-8957
Michael Wilson ...........891-0891
PREACHER
Barry Kennedy ... (931)787-7108
SECRETARY
Renee Childers
Office...........................842-6116
Fax...............................842-7091
E-MAIL
eastmaincoc38804@gmail.com
WEB PAGE
eastmaincoc.com
SUNDAY SERVICES
Worship....................... 9:00 a.m.
Bible Classes............. 10:15 a.m.
Worship..................... 11:15 a.m.
Singing or Devotional
Last Sunday of the Month
MID-WEEK
SERVICES
Wednesday Classes .....7:00 p.m.
EAST MAIN CHURCH OF CHRIST
1606 East Main Street
P. O. Box 1761
Tupelo, Mississippi 38802
“Thou shalt observe to do all that they inform thee”
(Deut. 17:10)
2. --article continued from page 1--
suppress grief. Crying is not only a human response
to grief, but it’s healthy.
Avoid empty platitudes. Trite phrases that
do not comfort and some of which do not
even accurately reflect biblical truth, need to remain
unspoken. Saying things like, “I understand exactly
how you feel,” or “God must have needed another
angel,” or “it was God’s will,” or “at least you’re
young, you can marry again/have more children”
are either hurtful, insensitive, or do not reflect the
truth. If you struggle for words to say, then simply
say these, “I’m sorry.” “I’m praying for you.” “I
love you.”
If we follow these suggestions, we will be
better equipped to comfort others the way God
comforts us (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
New Youth & Family
Minister
This past Sunday, Alex Blackwelder became a part
of the family at East Main in the capacity of Youth
and Family Minister. Alex is a recent graduate of
Freed Hardeman and has begun work on a master’s
degree. He is engaged, and he and his fiancé’ Cassie
are planning to be married in June. She is also a
student at Freed Hardeman University.
Alex is currently looking for a place to stay in
Tupelo through May. Once he and Cassie are married
(June 6), they will reside halfway between Tupelo and
Henderson, TN, for a year as Cassie finishes school.
Please be sure to meet Alex & Cassie! We are
looking forward to working with them!
**If you know of a small place Alex could rent for the
next four months please let us know, possibly a
“mother-in-law’s quarters” or basement.
Sisters Supporting Sisters
The Sisters Support-
ing Sisters group
will have their
quarterly meeting
this Thursday, Jan.
23 at 6:00 p.m. in
the multipurpose
room. All ladies of
the congregation are invited! Please sign the sheet on
the bulletin board across from the library if you will
be attending, so we will know how many to prepare
for.
LAM Mission Trip
If you are interested in participating in the 2020
Latin American Mission trip this summer, please let
Michael Wilson know.
Grief Seminar Notes
➢ On Friday, Jan. 24 sessions will be from
6:30-8:00 p.m.
➢ On Saturday, Jan. 25 breakfast will be
served from 8-8:30 a.m., then sessions will
be from 8:30 a.m. until 12 noon.
➢ Friday and Saturday sessions will be held in
the multipurpose room.
➢ On Sunday, Jan. 26 Ron Williams will
continue the Grief Seminar with lessons at
9:00 a.m., 10:15 a.m. and 11:15 a.m.
➢ Everyone from the 7th
grade up through
adults will meet in the auditorium for Bible
class Sunday at 10:15 a.m.
➢ We will have a potluck meal Sunday after
the 11:15 a.m. worship service in the
multipurpose room.
➢ Please come and invite your friends. A list
of the lesson topics is on the back page of
this bulletin.
Senior Youth
All the youth and adults attending CYC in
Pigeon Forge February 28-March 1, need to please
turn their $60 for the cabin rental to Amy Voyles or
Tim Davis ASAP.
John Duke stationed in Long Beach, MS
Caleb Williams stationed in Iraq
Rob Cross & family stationed in South Korea
3. Daily Bible Reading
January 22........................................... Exodus 13-15
January 23........................................... Exodus 16-18
January 24........................................... Exodus 19-21
January 25........................................... Exodus 22-24
January 26........................................... Exodus 25-27
January 27........................................... Exodus 28-29
January 28........................................... Exodus 30-31
Birthdays &
Anniversaries
Birthdays: Sarah Minor (Jan. 22), Bethany
Bryan (Jan. 23), Jordan Laney (Jan. 24), Ava
Bates (Jan. 26), Bettye Davis (Jan. 26),
Melea Mansel (Jan. 26), Hunter Underwood (Jan.
26), Stephanie Baldwyn (Jan. 28). Anniversaries:
Joyce & James Burney (Jan. 22).
Our Sick
Karen Mix, Jack McKinney (Lisa Lindsey’s
father), and Laney McMillen (infant daughter of
Anna Claire & Austin) are all home from the
hospital. Patsy Nichols is home with walking
pneumonia. Billie McNutt is home with bursitis.
Judy Marks, Linda Parker’s sister-in-law, is at the
Sanctuary Hospice House.
On-Going Illnesses
Mary Lou Walden, Pete Barber, Jean Mounce,
Steve Kelly, Frankie Estes, Donny Dulaney, Adam
McCurley, Mary Jordan, James Goddard, Bill Goff,
Leroy Brown, Jadon Parish, Jerry Smith, Mitch
Maclean, Mary Starz, Sheba Tuggers, Ruby Clark,
Homer Smith, Jill Rice, Ann Letteri, Shirley
Roberts
Nursing Homes
Evelyn Willis, Nancy Haywood, Randy
Attaway, Shirley McCarthy, Mary Southern, Veona
Harris, James Nichols
Home Devotional
In what chapter of the Bible do you find?
Hannah .....................................................1 Samuel 1
King Agrippa ...........................................Acts 25-26
Stoning of Stephen.......................................... Acts 7
Birth of the church .......................................... Acts 2
Name the books of the New Testament:
Matthew, Mark, Luke, John,
Acts, & the Letter to the Romans,
I & II Corinthians, Galatians & Ephesians,
Philippians, Colossians, I & II Thessalonians,
I & II Timothy, Titus & Philemon,
Hebrews, James,
I & II Peter,
I & II & III John,
Jude & Revelation
List the 8 writers of the New Testament:
❖ Matthew
❖ Mark
❖ Luke
❖ John
❖ Peter
❖ Paul
❖ James
❖ Jude
Memory Verse:
❖ Why do I need Jesus?
❖ Isaiah 59:2 “But your iniquities have
separated between you and your God, and
your sins have hid his face from you, that he
will not hear.”
Put the following Bible characters in
chronological order:
❖ Daniel
❖ Abraham
❖ Eve
❖ Joshua
Can you tell a Bible story from the
following picture?
Outreach Item for January
Garbage bags
4. Men to Serve Sunday, Jan. 26, 2020 a.m.
Announcements...................................Mike Childers
Bible Reading.....................................Ricky Johnson
Opening Prayer ................................Michael Wilson
Lord’s Supper
Chad Willis & Kent Nichols
Serve Congregation, East Side:
Grady Vines, Larry Bates, David Bates
Serve Congregation, West Side:
Greg Lyle, Ian Willis, Aaron Willis
Lead Singing..............................................Mark Hitt
Closing Prayer................................. Robert Kingsley
Ushers ...........................Larry Long & Jalon Mansel
Please meet in the library by 8:45 a.m.
Sunday Afternoon
Opening Prayer ....................................... Perry Hand
Closing Prayer................................... William Harris
Lead Singing.........................................Wesley Bass
Wednesday, January 29, 2020
Prayer................................................ Russell Deaton
Lead Singing......................................Hugh Scribner
Contact Jeff Mansel (871-0357) if unable to serve.
The elders kindly request that men leading in public
worship wear the best dress clothes they have.
Greeters ......................................Joe & Alicia Smith
..................................Grady & Debbie Vines
Prepare Lord’s Supper—January......................Hugh
& Rachel Scribner
Nursery (1st
worship)..Stephanie Baldwyn/Maggie Minor
(2nd
worship)............................Tammy & Sarah Minor
Pantry.................................................... Canned fruit
Attendance & Contribution
Mid-Week, 1-15-20..............................................154
Sunday 1st
Worship, 1-19-20 ...............................211
Sunday Bible Class ..............................................208
Sunday 2nd
Worship.............................................211
Contribution (budget $7,900)..........................$9,100
Coping with Loss (Grief Recovery seminar)
Guest Speaker: Ron Williams January 24th-26th
