Has your love relationship turned into a bad relationship? Read this article and decide whether ending a relationship is the solution for you. A broken relationship may just be the beginning of a new love relationship for you.

1. Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com
Relationships: Breaking Up Is A New Beginning
By Elsabe Smit, Author of
It’s Over! Move On And Feel Good About Yourself
Claim your FREE e-book How Do I Get Out Of This Relationship? worth £6.97
AND
A FREE copy of the video Why relationships Never Fail worth £8.87
Why is it that so many relationships and marriages break up because of what one
partner does or does not do? And even more puzzling: why is it that the same culprit
gets into another relationship and becomes the perfect partner to a very happy person?
Do people suddenly change their nature overnight?
And another puzzle: why is it that some people seem just unlucky in relationships?
Serial spouses and celebrities with a string of broken relationships always make a good
read in the popular magazines.
Maybe we need to look at these ‘wrong’ relationships with the ‘wrong’ people from a
different angle.
What if these broken marriages and relationships are not ‘wrong’ choices? What if each
one of them is a perfect choice, but we fail to see that, and judge ourselves as failures?
Let’s take a step back and work from the assumption that we incarnated into this world
because we have particular things to learn about ourselves. We have forgotten the
reason why we are here: to live a life that will bring us closer to perfection and to the
God that we were separated from.
We have become caught up in man-made and culture-based rules such as that people
must be in a relationship for life, or that once married, divorce is a failure.
We have forgotten that our lives are pre-planned before we are born, and that we
come here to live a perfectly designed script.
Am I saying that it is OK to flit from one relationship or marriage to another? Is it all
right to have multiple partners throughout your life?
Maybe it is. What if your particular life script was designed so that you learn about
yourself from having different relationships? And what if someone else’s life script was
Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com

2. Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com
designed so that they learn different lessons from the same partner over a much longer
period of time?
We have been conditioned to focus on the ‘failures’ of relationships, rather than on the
purpose of a relationship that has come to an end.
Because of this focus on ‘failure’, we do not allow ourselves or others the space to
contemplate on what we have learnt from the relationship.
It is far easier to show interest in the gossip-worthy history of someone who ‘failed’
than to ask what they have learnt from the relationship about themselves.
We prefer to ask why the relationship has come to an end, and the reason behind the
question is often to assign blame or to exonerate oneself. Our legal systems, religions
and cultures have been designed to reinforce this issue of blaming others rather than
understanding self.
Some people come out of a relationship, have clarity on what they want, and find the
‘perfect’ mate. They live happily ever after, but they have other lessons to learn, for
example from colleagues at work or from their children.
Other people come out of a relationship, refuse to do any introspection, and repeat the
same pattern in subsequent relationships. And rather than encourage them to look at
themselves in a loving way and become whole, we comment on their inability to have a
stable relationship. That makes us as ‘guilty’ as they are. But we are all guilty of
lacking insight, of nothing else.
We often see people being desperately unhappy in a relationship, but staying in it at all
costs, and often against the advice of those that care about them. They stay because
they are afraid of being out of the relationship and by themselves, or in some cultures
because of the social judgement that they will face when they leave, or more often
because they simply have no understanding of what it is that they need to deal with
before they can leave the relationship.
Whatever the reason for remaining in a destructive relationship or for having the same
kind of relationship with different people over and over again, the bottom-line is that
we need to understand the dynamic between the people in the relationship, and what
there is to be learnt from it.
The important issue is not the destination, i.e. the end of the relationship, but rather
the journey, i.e. the spiritual reason why we got involved in a particular relationship in
the first place. Only then can we learn about ourselves and find peace and put the
relationship behind us, with gratitude and love towards the person who helped us learn
about ourselves, rather than with all the destructive feelings that we have learnt to
Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com

3. Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com
associate with the end of a relationship.
If you are struggling to put a bad, controlling, co-dependent or destructive relationship
behind you, click on the links below to obtain your
FREE e-book How Do I Get Out Of This Relationship? worth £6.97
AND
A FREE copy of the video Why relationships Never Fail worth £8.87
If you really want to put this destructive relationship behind you and get on with your
life, then you may want to invest in the e-book
It’s Over! Move On And Feel Good About Yourself.
Copyright © Elsabe Smit 2010 www.TheIntuitionCoach.com