Self-confidence – how you measure your abilities and skills – isn't quite the same thing as self-esteem, which is how you value yourself as a person. But it is something that people often say they would like to have more of.
1. HOW TO BECOME MORE CONFIDENT
Self-confidence – how you measure your abilities and skills – isn't quite the
same thing as self-esteem, which is how you value yourself as a person. But it is
something that people often say they would like to have more of.
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Whether your self-confidence needs a major boostorjust a bit of a top-up, here
are some tips to get you started:
1. Recognize your strengths
Think about how good you feel when someone praises you and shows their
appreciation for something you've said or done. Praise is a great confidence
booster, but you don'talways have to rely on others for it.
Give yourself a big pat on the back by thinking about all the things you do well,
especially things you do better than others. Make a list if it helps. Include things
such as your skills, qualifications, and contacts. Then when you've finished, make
a note of your best achievements. Be as objective as you can – if you're struggling,
try to see yourself through someone else's eyes. What would they say you do well,
or see as your greatest achievements?
2. And if a project has just gone badly, focus on an element what went well, as well
as learning from the experience this provided. You can then focus on how you
have grown as an individual and how future projects will be better
Managing stress is essential if you want to feel confident. If you give into it,
you're more likely to experience negative thoughts – which is something you
should avoid if you want more self-confidence. Learning to control stress, on the
other hand, can make you feel you have control over your life, which itself can be
There are lots of things you can do to manage your stress levels more effectively.
Taking regular exercise can help, since exercise releases 'relaxing' hormones called
endorphins. Being active can also give you a boostbytaking your mind off any
thoughts that might be chipping away at your self-confidence. So, try going for a
walk at lunchtime instead of working through with a sandwich. You could also
consider taking up a relaxing activity such as yoga or Tai chi, both of which may
help you feel calmer.
Meditation is also recommended as a way of reducing stress. Mindful meditation,
which aims to make you more aware of what's happening in the present moment, is
recommended by a growing number of experts these days. Try it yourself by
reading our article Managing stress with mindfulness.
3. 3.Do your homework
Many people, even those who normally feel sure of themselves, find their self-
confidence flies out of the window whenever they're faced with certain situations –
making a speech, for instance, or going for a job interview. Being as fully prepared
for the event as possible is the key to overcoming performance nerves. For
example, if you're taking an exam, make sure you do your studying and revising in
plenty of time. Or if you're going for a job interview, find out as much as you can
about the company and the position, you're applying for well ahead of the day itself
(read Top ten interview tips for more advice).
If you've done your homework and have all the information you need to do well, it
can work wonders for your confidence.
4. Practice resilience
People with bags of self-confidence are rarely put off when they confront
obstacles or when things don'tgo according to plan. Instead, they embrace new
challenges because they aren't constantly defining themselves by their failures.
That way, if they do fail at something, they are much more likely to consider it as a
learning experience than feel despondentabout it.
Learning to be more resilient at work and at home means you may be able to cope
better with most of the thing’s life throws at you – and that in itself can give your
self-confidence a huge boost.
4. Forplenty of tips on building your resilience, read our articles 10 ways to boost
your work resilience and Guide to coping with change and boosting resilience.
5.Try something new
You won't do your confidence levels much good if you never try new things.
Sticking with what seems safe and familiar is all very well, but developing self-
confidence requires taking some risks, if only to learn how not to let things get you
down when you don'tsucceed. Overcoming the fear of failure can be a major
confidence builder, but you'll never achieve if you never step out of your comfort
Start by tackling something small – whether it's work-related or a personal
challenge. And if things don'twork out as you'd expected, remind yourself that
you're still one step closer to success.
6. Act confident
If all else fails, fake it. Even if you don'tfeel particularly confident, act as if you
are. You may be pleasantly surprised at how positively it can affect people's
reactions to you. Make sure your body language is confident: stand tall, relax your
shoulders, and hold your head up. Remember to keep good eye contactwith others
and smile – that way, people will see you as someone who's relaxed and feeling
sure of yourself.
5. There's another good reason why you should practice faking confidence. Many
experts also believe the more you practice acting as if you have lots of self-
confidence, the more it will increase your real confidence levels.
Aloha and stay safe everyone!