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By: Tamara Avery, PsyD
 Licensed Psychologist
   Defining Empathy
   Two skills needed for empathy
   Questions to think about
   Empathic listening techniques
   Power of reflective listening
   Why do we use empathic listening?
   Barriers to empathic listening
   Empathy is the skill of reflecting back to
    another person the emotions he or she is
    expressing so that he or she feels heard and
    understood.
   Empathy involves listening to others,
    understanding them, and communicating this
    understanding to them. –Egan 1994
   Empathy is the capacity to recognize and, to
    some extent, share feelings that are being
    experienced by another. –Rogers 1959
   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QG11gmv
    0p9s

   This video is a different look at empathy…and
    possibly an important one….especially if you
    deal with other people on a daily basis…

    ◦ By: John Marshall Roberts (Empathy Expert)
   To perceive and be aware of another's
    situation while taking into account another’s
    point of view (ex: putting yourself in their
    shoes).
   Using both verbal (words) and nonverbal
    (actions, physical cues) ways of
    communicating helps you be perceptive to
    others thoughts and feelings.
   Am I compassionate enough to care about
    understand the other persons’ feelings?
   Can I put myself in the other persons’ shoes so
    completely that I do not criticize or judge them?
   Can I let myself enter in to the others’ feelings
    and personal meanings to see these the way they
    do?


   Practicing empathy daily can help with any of the above
    questions you answered no to.
   Verbal and Non-Verbal Encouragers- these
    communicate to the person that:
         I am listening (ex: eye contact, nodding of the
          head, smiling)

         I want to listen (ex: you are not checking your watch ever 5
          minutes or rolling your eyes, sighing, etc)

         I want to understand more about your experience (ex:
          asking related and relevant questions to collect more
          information…such as “can you tell me more about that” or
          “I am curious about…”)
   Reflective Listening can be a powerful tool of
    communication. In reflective listening, you simply
    reflect to the other person what you think you
    heard, making sure you reflect their feelings.

    ◦ For example: Sally: I really don’t want to work anymore. I
      like being home spending time with my children.
      Reflection: So what I am hearing you say is that you like, and
       prefer being home with your children rather than working.

   Using reflective listening allows the other person
    to feel as though you have listened to what they
    have said and is clear that you understood them.
   Video 1
    ◦ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viuFhVd9Okw&f
      eature=relmfu

   Video 2
    ◦ The conclusion….
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIUCdfhoofQ&fe
      ature=relmfu
   To show an interest in the other person
   To support another in their attempts to
    rectify a situation
   Empathic listening is therapeutic in itself
   It leads to an increase in another’s
    satisfaction of you
   To discover another’s needs and concerns
   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrTwCB1H
    SEM

   Click on the above link to watch the video on
    controlled empathy and trauma.
   Cultural Differences
   Gender
   Not viewing the other individual as an equal
   Your preconceived ideas and beliefs
   Your uncomfortableness with another’s
    emotions
   Being empathic is something that may not
    come natural to all people.
   Practicing the techniques mentioned
    (reflective listening, encouragers) can help
    you become more empathic.
   Non-verbal communications and gestures
    play a key role in whether others believe you
    are there to help or hinder (hurt) the
    situation.
   More information and links on empathy…

    ◦ http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type
      =doc&id=37708&cn=298

    ◦ http://www.eqi.org/empathy.htm

    ◦ http://psychology.wikia.com/wiki/Empathy

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Empathy training

  • 1. By: Tamara Avery, PsyD Licensed Psychologist
  • 2. Defining Empathy  Two skills needed for empathy  Questions to think about  Empathic listening techniques  Power of reflective listening  Why do we use empathic listening?  Barriers to empathic listening
  • 3. Empathy is the skill of reflecting back to another person the emotions he or she is expressing so that he or she feels heard and understood.  Empathy involves listening to others, understanding them, and communicating this understanding to them. –Egan 1994  Empathy is the capacity to recognize and, to some extent, share feelings that are being experienced by another. –Rogers 1959
  • 4. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QG11gmv 0p9s  This video is a different look at empathy…and possibly an important one….especially if you deal with other people on a daily basis… ◦ By: John Marshall Roberts (Empathy Expert)
  • 5. To perceive and be aware of another's situation while taking into account another’s point of view (ex: putting yourself in their shoes).  Using both verbal (words) and nonverbal (actions, physical cues) ways of communicating helps you be perceptive to others thoughts and feelings.
  • 6. Am I compassionate enough to care about understand the other persons’ feelings?  Can I put myself in the other persons’ shoes so completely that I do not criticize or judge them?  Can I let myself enter in to the others’ feelings and personal meanings to see these the way they do?  Practicing empathy daily can help with any of the above questions you answered no to.
  • 7. Verbal and Non-Verbal Encouragers- these communicate to the person that:  I am listening (ex: eye contact, nodding of the head, smiling)  I want to listen (ex: you are not checking your watch ever 5 minutes or rolling your eyes, sighing, etc)  I want to understand more about your experience (ex: asking related and relevant questions to collect more information…such as “can you tell me more about that” or “I am curious about…”)
  • 8. Reflective Listening can be a powerful tool of communication. In reflective listening, you simply reflect to the other person what you think you heard, making sure you reflect their feelings. ◦ For example: Sally: I really don’t want to work anymore. I like being home spending time with my children.  Reflection: So what I am hearing you say is that you like, and prefer being home with your children rather than working.  Using reflective listening allows the other person to feel as though you have listened to what they have said and is clear that you understood them.
  • 9. Video 1 ◦ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=viuFhVd9Okw&f eature=relmfu  Video 2 ◦ The conclusion…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kIUCdfhoofQ&fe ature=relmfu
  • 10. To show an interest in the other person  To support another in their attempts to rectify a situation  Empathic listening is therapeutic in itself  It leads to an increase in another’s satisfaction of you  To discover another’s needs and concerns
  • 11. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrTwCB1H SEM  Click on the above link to watch the video on controlled empathy and trauma.
  • 12. Cultural Differences  Gender  Not viewing the other individual as an equal  Your preconceived ideas and beliefs  Your uncomfortableness with another’s emotions
  • 13. Being empathic is something that may not come natural to all people.  Practicing the techniques mentioned (reflective listening, encouragers) can help you become more empathic.  Non-verbal communications and gestures play a key role in whether others believe you are there to help or hinder (hurt) the situation.
  • 14. More information and links on empathy… ◦ http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type =doc&id=37708&cn=298 ◦ http://www.eqi.org/empathy.htm ◦ http://psychology.wikia.com/wiki/Empathy