YHR Fall 2023 Issue (Joseph Manning Interview) (2).pdf
What Parents Should Know
1. +Parent Forum:
Keeping Your Child Safe in a World of Chaos: Social
Media
Amy Leone, MS,MA, LMHC
Community Impact Inc. , JAG Chair
2. +
Remind Your Kids That Internet:
1.) Is a tool not a toy!
2.) Also that anything put on the internet or app is
FOREVER!!!! j
3.) Communicate only with those you ACTUALLY know (as in
you have met them in person)
4.) The Internet is a place where people can easily lie and
deceive you- just because they said they are something,
doesn’t mean they are!
5.) Keep yourself private and do not share personal
information.
3. +
What teens are
saying…..
• Kids spend more then 7 hours a day
connected to a digital advice.
• More then 70% of teens surveyed said
they have tricks for deceiving parents
about what they do online (LA times)
• 90% of teens surveyed think its ok for
parents to set rules for their phone and
internet use.
• 53% of teens admit to clearing their
search history to keep websites they
visited off the history.
• 3 out of 5 kids admit to having more
then one Facebook account (Colorado
Study)
4. +
More than 9 out of 10 American
teenagers use social media,
Instagram as the
most popular site by
far
They found that
Instagram has
become even more
popular, with 76
percent of teens
currently saying they
use it -- up 7 percent
since last spring.
By AGATA BLASZCZAK-BOXE CBS NEWS
October 8, 2014, 2:04 PM
5. +
3 quarters of teens said they were
using Instagram as their go to app
(Racheal Simmons)
This photo-sharing app is
social media’s queen
bee.
Instagram lets users
share their photos, and
“like” and comment on
their friends’.
The competition for “likes”
encourages creativity in young
users, who can use filters and
other devices to spruce up
their images
6. +
Instagram is….
A way for tweens and teens to
find out what their peers really
think of them, who likes them,
even how many people like
them.
They can obsess over their
friendships, monitoring social
ups and downs in extreme
detail.
They can strategically post at
high traffic hours
“Likes,” after all, feel like a
public, tangible, reassuring
statement of a teens social
status.
A new way for teens to chase
the feeling of being liked.
An popularity meter and teens
learn to manipulate the levers
of success.
7. +
Leveraging Instagram to do much
more then sharing photos (Rachael Simmons)
A personal Branding
Machine
A place for Elaborate
Birthday Collages
To know what friends really
think of them
To measure how much a
friend likes you
As a Public Barometer of
Popularity
To show BFF PDS
A way to Retaliate
9. +
The Scary Truth:
The 9 Most Dangerous Apps
Kik
Snapchat
Whisper
Yik Yak
Vine
Omegle
Tinder
App Hiders
10. +
Whisper &Yik Yak
Anonymous secret
sharing and messaging.
Express yourself honestly.
Share and connect with
others without having to
know them
Local Bulletin Board in
your area showing recent
posts.
11. +
KIK, Snapcat & Vine
Manage your conversations never
share your number.
Connect with people no matter how
you meet them,
Can capture an image or video and
make it available for a specific time.
Best way share life in motion.
Unlimited video uploads, free , share
on twitter and Facebook
12. + ChatRoulette,
Omegle, Tinder
• Chats are anonymous but you can
share personal information
• ChatRoulette and Omegle allows
you to video chat with strangers
• Apps for meeting new friends,
picked at random and lets you chat
with them.
• Finds interesting people around
you, anonymously can like or pass
if you find them attractive, if two
people like each other it’s a match
and the app allows you to connect
with them.
• These Apps have the ability to chat
within them
13. +
App Hider-
FREE available App Hiders: Spy Calculator, Cover Me, Secret
Calculator, My photo album, Lock folder, Safe Album
Available on ITunes and Google Play
Apps that hide secret photo’s,
videos, notes, passwords,
secret contacts, and text
messages.
Teens will hide apps in
mislabeled folders. Ex
homework
Hide apps in mislabeled folders
on an IPhone all the way to the
right.
14. +
Research shows that a majority of
teens believe that their parents are
starting to keep tabs on their online
and social media lives.
"With that, acronyms can be used
by kids to hide certain parts of their
conversations from attentive
parents,
Katie Greer is a national
Internet safety expert
15. +
28 Internet Acronyms:
LH6 - Let's have sex
WTTP - Want to trade pictures?
DOC - Drug of choice
TWD - Texting while driving
GYPO - Get your pants off
KPC- Keeping parents clueless
KOTL - Kiss on the lips
(L)MIRL - Let's meet in real life
PRON – Porn
TDTM - Talk dirty to me
20. 8 - Oral sex
TBH- To be honest
"Acronyms used for this purpose could potentially raise some red flags
for parents."
16. +
28 Internet Acronyms
99 - Parent gone
1174' - Party meeting place
THOT - That hoe over there
CID - Acid (the drug)
Broken - Hangover from
alcohol
420 – Marijuana
POS - Parent over shoulder
SUGARPIC - Suggestive or
erotic photo
IWSN - I want sex now
GNOC - Get naked on camera
NIFOC - Naked in front of
computer
PIR - Parent in room
CU46 - See you for sex
53X – Sex.
9 - Parent watching
17. +
Sexting
46% of kids 11-17 years old
said the have received a sexual
picture.
83% of teens 13-17 years old
feel pressured by peers to
participate.
Talk to your kids about obeying
the law
Respecting other’s privacy, and
everyone's right to keel there
bodies private
Your values you have about this
issues
18. +
Xbox Live
support.xbox.com
Grant or restrict access to games
based on the ESRB rating.
Make sure the movies your
children watch are appropriate
based on the MPAA rating.
Override your own restrictions so
you can decide, case by case,
which games and movies your
children can play
Set limits on console play time
using the Family Timer.
Control access to the online Xbox
LIVE® service
Manage who your child can
communicate with on Xbox LIVE using
video.
Decide who can see your child's gamer
profile and online status.
Limit your child's exposure to content
created by other members of the Xbox
LIVE community.
Create personal settings for each child,
which applies to their Xbox Live account
even when they use it outside the home
(for example, on a friend's Xbox 360
console).
19. + Overwhelming: New Devices,
New Programs, New Apps
What can we do to protect our
kids?
20. + Most kids are not malicious, but ALL kids need
guidance on staying safe online
On computers ensure restrictions
are set to enable the use of private
browsing on internet explorer or on
Google Chrome incognito mode.
This allows all history to be cleared
and unseen.
Regularly review installed apps
Monitor who they are
communicating with.
Monitor websites and social
media apps your kids are using.
Don’t assume you home router
is the only way to get online ex.
Hot spot from phone.
Physically review devices your
family has.
Know what the apps are and what
they are used for.
Ask questions about who and why.
21. +
Solutions: IOS has built in parental control
settings and Andriod as an App Manager
IPHONE, Ipod Touch, Ipad-
establish settings to not allow
apps to be installed or disable
deleting apps without a
password.
You will need to approve all Itune
purchases and installations of
apps
How to: Settings- General-
restrictions- enable passwords-
then you can choose the
options you want. (apps, TV,
movies, explicit music,
If you don’t know what the app
is look it up!
Google play and ITunes have
descriptions of all Apps
22. +
What Now?
Remember, your child’s safety is more important than their privacy.
As a parent, you aren’t being nosy by checking their cell phone on
a regular basis; you are being responsible.
Having a common charging area so you can easily check phones
could also be a good system for your family.
Do not allow phones or computers in the bedroom over- night.
Establish an end time for online use especially on school nights.
Also, take the time to explain to them (at an age-appropriate level)
why you are asking them questions and checking their phone and
privacy settings.
Many children do not realize just how much information they are
putting out there and how dangerous it can be.
23. +
Internet safety is just like any other
kind of safety.
You don’t just teach
your child how to cross
the street one time; you
repeat “look both ways”
to them for years!
Similarly, we need to
talk continually about
internet/app safety.
24. + If you have an older teen, and find some questionable apps on
their phone, it may be a good opportunity for a discussion. Here
are a few conversation starter ideas:
Conversation starter for YikYak– What kind of things would a
person want to post anonymously? How would you personally use
this app? What would you post anonymously? Why?
Conversation starter for SnapChat – Why do you want to send
pictures that disappear? Would you be okay with anyone seeing
that pic?
Conversation starter for Whisper – Why would you tell your
secrets to strangers? If you are struggling with something, will a
stranger care or be able to help you? Do you think it would be safe
to accept their help/friendship?
Conversation starter for any app – Are you being safe with that
app? Are you encouraging others or tearing them down? Are you
being bullied? Are you putting out too much information about
yourself?
Information from www.crosswalk.com
Hinweis der Redaktion
Is a tool not a toy!
2.) Also that anything put on the internet or app is FOREVER!!!! Even on apps where they say it isn’t- it is! Also people can take a screen shot of anything, even if it only pops up for a bit. Also, not truly anonymous, every device leaves a digital fingerprint.
3.) Communicate only with those you ACTUALLY know (as in you have met them in person), this is due to #4
4.) A place where people can easily lie and deceive you- just because they said they are something, doesn’t mean they are! (i.e. older people pose as younger and vice versa, men pose as women and vice versa, etc.)
5.) Keep yourself private and do not share personal information (what town you live in, where you work or go to school, phone number, address, etc.). However, due to #4, you should have an ID that is your true identity (i.e. first name only) and a true DOB- so you don’t deceive others either.
More than 9 out of 10 American teenagers use social media, and they name Instagram as the most popular site by far, according to the results a new survey by Piper Jaffray, an investment bank and asset management firm.
In the survey, analysts examined how kids' social media preferences have changed over the last six months. They found that Instagram has become even more popular, with 76 percent of teens currently saying they use it -- up 7 percent since last spring.
Twitter ranked second, used by 59 percent of teens. Facebook came in third, but saw its popularity decline significantly. Just 45 percent of teens surveyed said they use the world's biggest social network; its popularity has plummeted by 27 percent since last spring.
Pinterest and Tumblr each claimed a little over 20 percent. Another 20 percent of teens said they use "other" social networks, not named in the survey but likely including some popular anonymous messaging services and the disappearing-message app Snapchat.
Instagram lets users share their photos, and “like” and comment on their friends’.
The competition for “likes” encourages creativity in young users, who can use filters and other devices to spruce up their images.
And its simplicity – it’s just pictures, right? — comforts parents haunted by the cyberbullying they hear about on Facebook and Twitter.
But Instagram’s simplicity is also deceiving: look more closely: a way for tweens and teens to find out what their peers really think of them (Was that comment about my dress a joke or did she mean it?),
who likes you (Why wasn’t I included in that picture?),
even how many people like them (if you post and get too few likes, you might feel “Instashame,” as one young woman calls it).
They can obsess over their friendships, monitoring social ups and downs in extreme detail.
They can strategically post at high traffic hours when they know peers are killing time between homework assignments.
“Likes,” after all, feel like a public, tangible, reassuring statement of a girl’s social status.
as they become preteens, research shows that girls’ confidence takes a nosedive. Instagram, then, is a new way for girls to chase the feeling of being liked that eludes so many of them. Instagram becomes an popularity meter and teens learn to manipulate the levers of success.
Here are a few of the ways that girls are leveraging Instagram to do much more than just share photos:
To Know What Friends Really Think Of Them
In the spot where adults tag a photo’s location, girls will barter “likes” in exchange for other things peers desperately want: a “TBH” (or “to be honest”). Translation? If you like a girl’s photo, she’ll leave you a TBH comment. For example: “TBH, ILYSM,” meaning, “To be honest I love you so much.” Or, the more ambivalent: “TBH, We don’t hang out that much.
To Measure How Much a Friend Likes You
In this case, a girl may trade a “like” — meaning, a friend will like her photo — in exchange for another tidbit of honesty: a 1-10 rating, of how much she likes you, your best physical feature, and a numerical scale that answers the question of “are we friends?” and many others. Girls hope for a “BMS,” or break my scale, the ultimate show of affection.
As a Public Barometer of Popularity
Instagram lets you tag your friends to announce that you’ve posted a new photo of them. Girls do the app one better: they take photos of scenes where no person is present – say, a sunset — but still tag people they love and add gushing comments. It’s a kind of social media mating call for BFFs. But girls also do it because the number of tags you get is a public sign of your popularity. “How many photos you’re tagged in is important,” says Charlotte, 12. “No one can see the actual number but you can sort of just tell because you keep seeing their name pop up.”
To Show BFF PDA
That broken heart necklace you gave your bestie? It’s gone the way of dial up. Now, girls use Instagram biographies – a few lines at the top of their page — to trumpet their inner circle. It’s a thrill to be featured on the banner that any visitor to the page will see — but not unusual to get deleted after a fight or bad day, in plain, humiliating sight of all your friends.
A Way to Retaliate
Angry at someone? Don’t tag the girl who is obviously in a picture, crop her out of it entirely, refuse to follow back the one who just tried to follow you, or simply post a photo a girl is not in. These are cryptic messages adults miss but which girls hear loud and clear. A girl may post an image of a party a friend wasn’t invited to, an intimate sleepover or night out at a concert. She never even has to mention the absent girl’s name. She knows the other girl saw it. That’s the beauty of Instagram: it’s the homework you know girls always do.
A Personal Branding Machine
Girls face increasing pressure not only to be smart and accomplished, but girly, sexy and social. In a 2011 survey, 74% of teen girls told the Girl Scout Research Institute that girls were living quasi-double lives online, where they intentionally downplayed their intelligence, kindness and good influence – and played up qualities like fun, funny and social. On Instagram, girls can project a persona they may not have time, or permission, to show off in the classroom: popular, social, sexy. Cultivating a certain look is so important that it’s common for girls to stage ‘photo shoots’ with each other as photographers to produce shots that stand out visually. (Plus a joint photo shoot is more evidence of friendship.)
A Place For Elaborate Birthday Collages
Remember coming to school on your big day, excited to see what you’d find plastered to your locker? Now girls can see who’s celebrating them hours before they get off the bus. Birthday collages on Instagram are elaborate public tributes, filled with inside jokes, short videos, and pictures of memories you may not have been a part of. “There is definitely a ‘I love you the most. I’ve loved you the longest edge to these birthday posts,” one parent told me. Collages that document the intensity or length of a relationship are a chance to celebrate a friend – or prove just how close you are to the birthday girl. Although most girls know to expect something from their closest friends, not getting one is seen as a direct diss, a parent told me. And it can be competitive: another parent told me her daughter’s friend stayed up until midnight just so she could be the first to post.
While girls may seem addicted to their online social lives, it’s not all bad — and they still prefer the company of an offline friend to any love they have to click for. (In a survey that would surely surprise some parents, 92% of teen girls said they would give up all of their social media friends if it meant keeping their best friend.) And, of course, likes aren’t everything. As 13 year-old Leah told me, “Just because people don’t write me a paragraph on Instagram doesn’t mean they don’t like me.”
The bad guy’s not just at the bus stop anymore. He has entrance right into your kid’s bedroom and hand-held cellphone device.” Sexual predators can target your children even when your child is in the room down the hall. And sexual predators aren’t the only problem. Cyber-bullying and exposures to sexually inappropriate content are additional concerns.
New apps are constantly being created, so it’s important to monitor what your child downloads. Being aware of the online tricks predators use will help you know what to look for. So here is a current list of some of the most dangerous apps:
Whisper - This app allows you to post secrets anonymously and also allows you to chat with other users in your geographic area.
Why It’s Dangerous: Many children are drawn to communicating with strangers, feeling that their secrets are safer with them than with their friends. This app is a perfect tool for ill-intentioned strangers looking to connect with young people because it allows you to exchange messages with people nearest to you (so anonymity can be easily lost).
YikYak - All Yik Yak users are anonymous. They don’t create a profile or account, but they can post comments that are accessible to the nearest 500 people (within a 1-5 mile radius).
A psychiatrist called this the most dangerous app he’d ever seen because it “can turn a school into a virtual chat room where everyone can post his or her comments, anonymously. Untruthful, mean, character-assassinating short messages are immediately seen by all users in a specific geographic area.”
Why It’s Dangerous: This app is causing problems in schools across the United States, with students maliciously slandering teacher, staff, and other students. In fact, several schools have now banned smart phones from campus because of this particular app.
Kik - A free app-based alternative texting service that allows texts/pictures to be sent without being logged in the phone history. (Similar apps: Viber, WhatsApp, TextNow)
Why It’s Dangerous – Makes it easier for your child to talk to strangers without your knowledge since it bypasses the wireless providers’ short message services (SMS). Children also think they can “sext” without parents finding out. In addition, strangers can send your child a “friend request.”
Snapchat – Allows you to capture an image or video and make it available to a recipient for a specific time. After that time limit is up, the picture/video automatically disappears forever…or so Snapchat claims. (Similar apps: Poke, Wire, and Wickr)
Why It’s Dangerous – Kids can receive (or send ) sexually inappropriate photos. This app also makes kids feel like they can “sext” or send inappropriate pictures without consequences because the image will self-destruct automatically. The truth is that nothing sent over the internet disappears. There are always ways to retrieve and capture those images.
The tag on the app store says can not prevent recipients from capturing pictures or saving messages by taking a screen shot or suing an image capture device.
Vine – Allows users to watch and post six second videos.
Why It’s Dangerous –While many of the videos are harmless, porn videos do pop up into the feed, exposing your children to sexually explicit material. You can also easily search for/access porn videos on this app. Predators utilize this app to search for teens and find their location. Then they try to connect with them via other messaging apps.
ChatRoulette and Omegle– These apps allow you to video chat with strangers.
Why It’s Dangerous – Not only are users chatting with strangers, they could be chatting with a fake stranger. “Chat sites like Chatroulette and Omegle have done their best to produce systems that warns users when the people they are chatting to are potentially using fake webcam software, however developers still manage to slip under their radars with frequent updates.” So a fifty-year-old man could set up a fake webcam and use images from a 15-year-old boy that looks like a teen celebrity to convince your child to send inappropriate pictures or get information about your child’s location.
Tinder – Users post pictures and scroll through the images of other users. When they think someone is attractive they can “flag” the image. If that person has also “flagged” them in return, the app allows you to contact them.
Why It’s Dangerous – This app, and similar apps such as Down, Skout, Pure, and Blendr, are primarily used for hooking up.
But how, on earth, is a parent to keep up with all these acronyms, especially since new ones are being introduced every day?
"It's a lot to keep track of," Greer said. Parents can always do a Google search if they stumble upon an phrase they aren't familiar with, but the other option is asking their children, since these phrases can have different meanings for different people.
"Asking kids not only gives you great information, but it shows that you're paying attention and sparks the conversation around their online behaviors, which is imperative."
When you set up each player’s profile, you have a choice of the type of profile you want (child, teen, adult, custom); under each, you have options on filtering what you see, what you can play, what television shows/movies you watch, what you share with the world, and where you’re connected on social media. We had no problem in setting up profiles for the adults.
But we had a few problems setting up profiles for my kids. In short,
it’s a very complicated process that will hopefully be streamlined one day.
The reason it has become more complicated is because of the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA), a law which requires any online site to obtain verifiable parent permission before collecting information from kids under 13 years old. This law was updated in July 2013, just a few months before the Xbox ONE launch. - See more at: http://internetsafety.trendmicro.com/day1with_xboxone_for_parents#sthash.VeA2nPLa.dpuf
When you set up each player’s profile, you have a choice of the type of profile you want (child, teen, adult, custom); under each, you have options on filtering what you see,
what you can play,
what television shows/movies you watch,
what you share with the world, and
where you’re connected on social media.
What Now?
Remember, your child’s safety is more important than their privacy. As a parent, you aren’t being nosy by checking their cell phone on a regular basis; you are being responsible. Perhaps your family could establish family media rules, such as having to check with a parent before downloading a new app or game. Having a common charging area so you can easily check phones could also be a good system for your family.
Also, take the time to explain to them (at an age-appropriate level) why you are asking them questions and checking their phone and privacy settings. Many children do not realize just how much information they are putting out there and how dangerous it can be.
If you have an older teen, and find some questionable apps on their phone, it may be a good opportunity for a discussion. Here are a few conversation starter ideas:
Conversation starter for YikYak– What kind of things would a person want to post anonymously? How would you personally use this app? What would you post anonymously? Why?
Conversation starter for SnapChat – Why do you want to send pictures that disappear? Would you be okay with anyone seeing that pic?
Conversation starter for Whisper – Why would you tell your secrets to strangers? If you are struggling with something, will a stranger care or be able to help you? Do you think it would be safe to accept their help/friendship?
Conversation starter for any app – Are you being safe with that app? Are you encouraging others or tearing them down? Are you being bullied? Are you putting out too much information about yourself? Is this an app that brings God glory?
Christian parents are called to instruct their children in biblical wisdom (Deuteronomy 6:6-8) and today that includes teaching them to apply biblical wisdom to media. Teaching your children how to choose appropriate apps and use them responsibly is vitally important in our media-saturated world.
Internet safety is just like any other kind of safety. You don’t just teach your child how to cross the street one time; you repeat “look both ways” to them for years! Similarly, we need to talk continually about internet/app safety. How much information should you share? With whom should you communicate? What should you post?
How much information should you share?
With whom should you communicate?
What should you post?