The document discusses understanding oneself and effective communication. It introduces the Johari window model for self-awareness and describes an individual's circle of influence over traits like self-awareness and self-esteem. Effective communication is important in various situations and depends on one's delivery, body language, listening skills, and dressing appropriately. Business attire should be suitable for one's profession and audience. First impressions, including through appearance and nonverbal communication, are very important.
3. THE MODEL CAN BE LOOKED UPON AS A COMMUNICATION WINDOW
THROUGH WHICH YOU GIVE AND RECEIVE INFORMATION ABOUT
YOURSELF AND OTHERS
4. THE JOHARI WINDOW
The first pane - Open
{Things I know, Things they know}
The second pane - Blind
{Things I Don’t know, Things they know}
The third pane - Hidden
{Things I know, Things they Don’t know}
The fourth pane - Unknown
{Things I Don’t know, Things they Don’t
know}
8. CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE
Self-awareness
Aware of oneself, including one's traits, feelings,
and behaviors
Self-actualization
Realize all of one's potentialities
Self-confidence
Sense of self-worth and capabilities
Self-conscious
Paying attention to our self as a whole
Self-esteem
How we feel about or value ourself
9. CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE…..CONT
Self-effectiveness
Belief that one is capable of performing in a certain
manner to attain certain goals
Self-control
Able to manage one’s own disruptive thinking,
feeling and impulsive action.
Self-regulation
Guidance of one’s own goal directed thinking,
feeling and action
Self-monitoring
Our ability to monitor our self
10. CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE…..CONT
Self-transcendence
Going beyond or above the limitations of one's self
Self-motivation
Working in a careful and consistent manner without
giving up
Self-instruction
You talk /instruct to your self
11. Urgent Not Urgent
. Crisis
. Pressing problems
. Deadline-driven projects,
meetings, preparations
. Preparation
. Prevention
. Values clarification
. Planning
. Relationship building
. True re-creation
. Empowerment
. Interruptions, some
phone calls
. Some mail, some reports
. Some meetings
. Many proximate,
pressing matters
. Many popular activities
. Trivia, busywork
. Some phone calls
. Time wasters
. “Escape” activities
. Irrelevant mail
. Excessive TV
I II
III IV
Important
Not
Important
Task & Time management table
12. Duplicity
Unkindness
Violated
expectations
Outside stress
and pressures
Time wasters
Interruptions
Pressing
problems
Crises
PERSONAL IMMUNE SYSTEM
Live these Habits
Spend time
in Quadrant II
Follow correct
principles
Control own life
Maintain high
Emotional Bank
Account with self
and others
Maintain reserve
capacity
Be flexible
Empower and
serve others
Communicate
Empathically
Synergize with
others using a
win-win approach
14. Teaching a class
Promotion
Interview
Group discussion
At a Business
Dinner/Meeting
Presenting
your idea
Yearly Appraisal
Issue Instructions
to your staff
Asking for a raise
Client interaction
Thank you
Speeches
Team Meetings Brain storming
sessions
WHEN IS EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IMPORTANT?
16. ASK YOURSELF !!
How do you communicate
How have you dressed?
Body language
17. WHICH ONE ARE YOU ?
Submissive
Assertive
Aggressive
18. STYLES OF COMMUNICATION
Submissive Assertive Aggressive
Low levels of confidence Good level of confidence Over confident
Do not get what you want Not Always Winning, But
Always Understanding --
How You Play The Game
You think you get what you
want.
Feel like you are being
taken for granted
You are not taken for
granted.
People around you feel like
they are being taken for
granted
High Stress No stress – a sense of
calmness and maturity
prevails
High stress
Take too much account of
the other person's rights
Recognize the other
person's rights to be heard
Other person's rights don't
matter
Feeling of guilt Can say No without feeling
guilty
Can say No without feeling
guilty
19. IN YOUR COMMUNICATION…..
Keep it brief (K-I-S-S)
Keep your language simple
Slang or profanity is neither
correct nor effective
plan your conversation
20. REMEMBER !!!
Only 7% of the impact you make comes from the
words you speak.
21. DRESSING FOR SUCCESS
There are 3 sides to self image:
1. As you see yourself.
2. As others see you.
3. As you truly are.
22. DRESSING STYLE = FIRST PERCEPTION !!
Some of the perceptions people can form
solely from your appearance are:
Your professionalism
Your level of sophistication
Your intelligence
Your credibility
23. BUSINESS ATTIRE
Three basic things you need to consider :
1. Your Line of Work
2. Your Corporate Culture
3. Your Audience
24. BEFORE YOU BUY SOMETHING TO WEAR TO WORK,
ASK YOURSELF:
Is it appropriate for the kind of job I have?
Is it a fad or will it hold up as a basic wardrobe
foundation?
Does it fit properly?
Will I stand out (in a positive light) if I wear it to
work?
Do I feel successful and confident wearing it?
Would my boss wear it?
25. WHAT LOOK DOES THIS CONVEY??
Authoritative, Conservative, and Competent.
26. WHAT LOOK DOES THIS CONVEY??
Trustworthy, Approachable, and Knowledgeable.
27. FINAL THOUGHTS ON APPAREL
NEVER under estimate the power of first impressions..
Dress appropriately for your surroundings
Conservative colors are always safest.
Underwear stays UNDER your wears !!
33. Hearing- physical process; natural;
passive
Listening- physical & mental
process; active; learned process; a
skill
You must CHOOSE to
participate in the process of
listening
Hearing V/s Listening
36. QUICK TIPS !!
Smile first and always shake hands when
you meet anyone.
Take your time during introductions!
Maintain eye contact in any conversation
Listen carefully
Objective: To help participants understand their level of communication skills
Description
Turn to the Participants handbook on “How Effective Are Your Communication Skills?
Give them 5 - 10 minutes
(Page 4 of participants handout.)
Teaching a class
Job Interview
Group discussion
Asking for a raise
Presenting your idea
Yearly Appraisal
At a Business dinner
Client interaction
Issue Instructions to your staff
Thank you
Speeches
Team Meetings
Brain storming sessions
This is just to emphasize the different occasions when a person will be required to communicate. There could be several more occasions..encourage the participants to come up with examples.
2-5 mins
Under Messenger you will talk about
Being submissive/Passive; assertive; aggressive
Business Dressing
Preparation – doing your homework before a meeting/call/dinner etc.
2-5 minutes
Ask participants to see which clipart they most identify themselves with..
The worker who is banging his head into the computer – resigned to his fate of working over the weekend : Submissive
The worker who looks pleasant and is still saying no. Assertive
The worker who is having a temper tantrum. He will either lose his job or will rant and rave over working on the weekend or worse still not work…but still rant and rave at home at the thought of working !! Aggressive. 5-8 mins
This will just summarize the activity on the previous slide.
5-10 mins
Keep it brief. As US President Franklin Delano Roosevelt said to his key staff,
A good speaker will be brief be bright ... be gone!
Keep your language simple. Customers may only require the facts rather than a complete history of events. Use familiar everyday words. Straightforward speech is an asset when talking about complex subjects. Simple familiar language is most important when discussing technical information with non-technical people. Avoid slang, jargon, or ‘techno speak’.
What is commonplace language to you may be unknown to your customers. Avoid language that is vague or too general. Vague, tentative language can produce misunderstanding, frustration, and errors. Slang or profanity is neither correct nor effective when speaking to a customer.
If the opportunity is there, plan your conversation. Each customer will have a certain knowledge level or experience level. They may understand the industry we work in. They may even have a certain social standing. Formulate your questions based on any information you have. Delivering a planned conversation to a level that will be understood will reflect a professional image by you to the customer.
5-10 mins
You can break that 7% further down into sections:
the type of words you use
the sort of sentences you use
how you phrase them.
The rest is visual - your appearance, the sound of your voice and your body language.
3-5 mins
Ask everyone what they think self image is??
Where there differences in your perceptions?
Has anyone ever had someone tell them, “O I never thought you would be like this!!”. That means what they “thought” of earlier was a perception !!
Do you see areas for self improvement?
5-10 mins
They say “Don’t judge a book by a cover…but ask yourself…
Have you ever done a double take when you see someone dressed funnily??
Have you ever pointed out a badly dressed or over exposed person to a colleague/friend??
Do you know that person?? Then why the judgment?
Whether these perceptions are real or imagined, they underscore how your appearance instantly influences the opinions of strangers, peers, and superiors. Being well dressed in a corporate setting can influence not just perceptions, but also promotions
The way you dress speaks volumes about who you are as a person and as a business communicator.
Let's face it, clothes talk. Whenever you enter a room for the first time, it takes only a few seconds for people you've never met to form perceptions about you and your abilities.
You don't have to utter a word; people peg you one way if you're dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, slacks and a sports coat, and yet another if you're wearing a bow tie and seersucker suit. Regardless of who you really are, your clothes and body language always speak first.
10 mins
Would a student counselor look appropriate in a little tight black dress?
Would a CEO look appropriate in torn jeans and a body hugging sleeveless t-shirt?
Would a corporate trainer look appropriate in a long tight skirt…she would look like a mermaid trying to cross the room!!!
5-10 mins
Discuss each question and subsequent answers with the participants.
10 mins
Authoritative, Conservative, and Competent.
2 mins
Trustworthy, Approachable, and Knowledgeable.
2 mins
People make assumptions about you based on your appearance at your first meeting
Ask how many of the participants have seen the movie “Pretty Woman” Julia Roberts wants to buy new clothes. The sales assistants reject her because of the way she looks…big mistake.
You are more likely to receive better service, command more respect, and get what you want if you are dressed and speak appropriately for your surroundings
Shades of blue and gray are best. Black can be too serious, brown too casual.
ALWAYS make sure that your underwear stays under your wears. Never, never adjust your underwear in public.
5-10 mins
Read out the joke…add humor and visual effect !!
2-3 mins
In business, you are dressing to have an impact on your bosses and teammates. If your clothes don’t convey the message that you are competent, able, ambitious, self-confident, reliable, and authoritative, nothing you say or do will overcome the negative signals emanating from your apparel. Betty Harragan, Games Your Mother Never Taught You
2-3 mins
Objective: Group members learn the importance of expression through body language
Time: 20 minutes
Description
Activity using 6 volunteers. The rest of the group has to guess.
Shyness using legs
Disgust using arms
Anger using fingers
Enthusiasm using eyes
Happiness using whole body
Nervousness using face
Let us now look at what you should do. What you do during a conversation has a major impact on the interpretation of the message received.Act out each one negatively: exaggerate for the audience!!Type of body language to be aware of (in yourself as well as others) are:
Eye contact - Much here depends upon our personality, topic of the conversation and knowledge of the other person. Research has shown that we tend to look more at others when we like them! When in one to one discussions it is best to establish a comfortable eye contact with each other. Remember, if you are busy with some paperwork at the time, stop what you are doing and stand up.
Facial expression - probably the most important area in non - verbal communication. The face conveys emotions and feelings with far greater precision than words alone. For instance, happiness, anger, enthusiasm, disinterest, puzzlement, fear, surprise, etc. Keeping your emotions and feelings under control will aid you keep your facial expressions under control.
Postures and gestures - use of hand and arm gestures, body position and movements. Some of us are natural gesticulators and make great use of our hands and arms to illustrate what we are saying in conversation, while others make only limited use of gestures. Keep an open body stance with your hands in front of you at all times. And no hands in pockets!
Personal biases and prejudices - appearance and what we wear seams to have become extremely important in recent years. Clothes, accessories, jeweler, hair and even physique have a powerful affect on how we are perceived by others. With this in mind we should be aware of our own prejudices in this area, for instance: real men don't wear earrings, red is an aggressive color or women should not wear trousers at work! Appearance and grooming is probably the area many of us base our first impressions on. So, do not allow your own personal preferences or prejudices affect your judgment:
Don’t judge people by their outward appearance.
Eg:Friend’s child, nose pierce, short skirt, long nails..friend said SON u’r not going out like that !!!
Seriously when a person does not feel judged by you there is more likely hood of them choosing you.
Personal space - careful you do not invade an individual's personal space as this will look aggressive. A good indication for determining good distance is to stand at the distance you would normally shake someone's hand. Never be afraid to shake someone's hand. Handshaking breaks down barriers!
Orientation - make sure you face the person you are talking to. Remember that this along with good eye contact will show the customer you are actively listening to them.
Observing what a person does while they are speaking has the most impact on message delivery of all the communication methods. So when listening actively in any interpersonal situation, not only are we using our ears but also our eyes. Of course we must always be aware that our interpretations of meaning in all the areas above are subjective.However, if we combine the use of effective questioning, active listening and observation, our judgments and contributions are likely to be more effective.We can all interpret body language but very rarely read the signals. Women do much better than men, and this is sometimes referred to as intuition. Most body language is conditioned, there is very little that is natural, body language that we are born with. The movement of the head to indicate “no”, and the eyebrow raised in surprise are two of the most obvious. Conditioned body language is what we generally see, body language that we are influenced to use whilst growing up. The nod of the head to indicate “yes”, the rubbing of the eyes to indicate lack of understanding and so on. So this means that there will be cultural differences in interpreting body language as well and we need to take this into consideration.
15-20 mins
Ask the participants their definition of listening.
What's the difference between hearing and listening?
Is there any difference at all?
5 mins
E.g.: you and your friend go to a mall. Do some shopping, watch a movie..have lunch together. Your mum asks you what the mall was like. You say it was great..nice cool AC environment, great décor, soft music playing etc. Your mum asks you…which track/artist were they playing…you think and respond by saying, “O I wasn’t really listening”!!
If you are not hearing-impaired, hearing simply happens.
Listening requires concentration so that your brain processes meaning from words and sentences.
Listening leads to learning.
Listening is hard!
WHY CHOOSE???
Have you ever said “Forget it I don’t want to listen to you??”
Or has someone ever complained “Why don’t you just listen??!!”
5 mins
Practice listening
In the movie, "Michael", Andie McDowell's character asks Michael how he knew she wasn't who she said she was. He leans toward her and whispers, "I pay attention"!
Listening is a verb.
Practice listening to what the other person is saying and not saying
Hutch sms example: a friend of mine was having problem with her Hutch connection. The same sms was sent several times. When she called the customer care service she complained that several sms’s going made her look bad and as if she did not have any other work. The customer care agent was very smart. He immediately read into what my friend was NOT saying. He advised her that she would not have to PAY for each time the sms went. My friend hung up…a happy customer.
Listen for opportunity for both of you.
5-8 mins