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Gazette 2012 january
1. With support from the hospital ad-
ministration and staff, the PNRC, and
the Samahang Magdalo - Gensan
Chapter, the program came into fruition
after collecting fifty-one (51) bags of
donated blood which were then sent
to the PNRC Blood Bank. Later on Feb-
ruary 25, another blood letting program
will be conducted to continually pursue
such endeavor.
The blood letting activity is just one
of the many community outreach pro-
grams of St. Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. in
order to show its commitment of ser-
vice not only to the patients but also to
the constituents of Gen. Santos City
and the whole Socksargen area.
To donate blood, call (083) 552-
3162 loc.105 or 0932-694-9807.
AS MORE AND MORE PEOPLE re-
quired blood
t r a n s f u s i o n s
each day and yet
a steady decline
of people donat-
ing blood, it is
but inevitable that
the Philippine
National Red
Cross (PNRC)
Gen-Sar Chapter
Blood Bank, which supplies donated
blood to nearly all hospitals of the city,
would at some point in time face a
crisis. But it is never too late.
Last January 20, 2012, St. Elizabeth
Hospital, Inc., under the leadership of
its training officer, Efren T. Catimbang
Jr., RN, answered the dire need to re-
plenish the chapter's supply of donated
blood through
a blood letting
activity.
"Initially, we
had planned
to sponsor
the blood
letting activity
on February
25 this year,
but we de-
cided to conduct it earlier after getting a
call from the PNRC," says Mr. Catim-
bang. He noted that low levels of blood
supply could prove lethal for some pa-
tients especially trauma cases and any
delay in providing sufficient amounts of
appropriate blood types for patients
could make a life and death difference.
SEHI answers urgent call for blood
January 2012 Volume III Issue 1
IN THIS ISSUE:
GREEN THUMBS. Nurses take part in the fight 3
THE 5S WAY. Writer Argentina Roma shares
the Japanese fail-safe method for total or-
ganization.
4
SPORTSFEST. Read how SEHI employees 6
MAGICAL CHRISTMAS. Discover the fairytale-
like wonders of SEHI’s Christmas Party.
7
JUST FOR LAUGHS. PAMELA AQUINO shares
with us some funny moments happening
around the hospital.
8
BY DARYL PANERIO
Ronald Limon, SEHI Safety
Officer, gives out a portion
of his lifeblood to help in-
crease the PNRC’s dwindling
supply of donated blood.
2. Page 2
As we look forward into the year of the water
dragon: 2012 – the trends within our community,
demographic forces, technological shifts – noth-
ing suggests that the ride is going to be much eas-
ier. In fact, the ride is going to be much wilder,
more turbulent than ever. But don’t fret because
we will be prepared.
The skills that we most need to learn in order to
survive and thrive are the skills of dealing with
change. An article ‘Leading a life the 5S way’ by
Argentina S. Roma, tells us of a commendable
Japanese practice of sorting, systematizing,
sweeping, sanitizing, and acquiring self-discipline
that will likely enhance service quality, productiv-
ity, safety and reliability. Our seminar on total
quality management has provided us with inputs
and skills on how to be of great service to our pa-
tients by doing things right the first time. Hospital
activities like the Sportsfest and Fun Runimbues
the spirit of camaraderie and sportsmanship
among employees and organizational leaders.
And as the hospital’s 50th
Foundation Anniversary
comes close, more fun-filled and enriching events
are expected to line up this year.
Also, this 2012, with the help from the staff of the Corporate Plan-
ning Office, the official hospital publication – the Gazette – will
not only be publishing through printouts but also online through
the SEHI website. By embarking on this task, the publication will
be able to increase the expanse of its potential readers as well as
show the world the beauty of St. Elizabeth Hospital. We even
stepped back a little to see what a bit of fine tuning we could do,
and voila, we now have a new and improved Gazette. So expect
the Gazette to be trendier, friendlier, easier to read, and best of
all, more informative.
Change is inevitable. In as much as you want to take a halt, the
world will keep on moving and you will keep on moving. Change
will always have its ups and downs; its pros and cons. The com-
pany had already made the first step. Now, it is up to you to make
yours; whether you will change gradually or incrementally – as
long as you can change for the good.
Happy New Year and happy reading!
Daryl Panerio
Change is good!
Most of us live - and even think - as if
the world were static, or as if it
should be. As individuals, as profes-
sionals, and as members or leaders
of organizations, too often the way
we act, plan, and react betrays the
assumption that tomorrow will be
much like today, that we'll slide by
all right if we just get a little better,
a little smarter, at doing what we
are already doing.
But no! The reality is quite different.
Looking back at 2011, a lot of
changes had transpired within our
hospital. From center of safety, St.
Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. advanced to
center of quality. New services of-
fered, old structures remodeled,
new rules established. We greeted
new faces and even bid farewell to
some of our colleagues. All of us
dealt with change: some drastically,
some subtly.
3. Page 3
tion of programs of
quality assurance.
Dr. Antoinette M. Ladio,
Medical specialist IV-
AQAS, Jennil G. Santo-
cildes and Ramil J.
Sangco, RN, social insur-
ance officers of PHIC Re-
gional office, spearheaded
the conduct of the inspec-
tion.
Ms. Liza R. Hidalgo, MRD
head reveals that on the
specific areas, analysis or
chart audit and filing and
retrieval propel the highlight
of the success.
“If you do not have a good
filing system, definitely
disorder and breakdown
The Medical Records De-
partment, Area 5 on Infor-
mation Management, gained
a perfect rating among the
seven critical areas on im-
proving quality care on the
concluded March 22 and
23, 2011 PHIC inspection
accrediting Saint Elizabeth
Hospital Incorporated as
Center of Quality.
The Philippine Health Insur-
ance Corporation (PHIC)
isn't only about universal
social insurance coverage.
The National Health Insurane
Act of 1995, explicitly man-
dates the PHIC to promote
the improvement in the
quality of health services
through the institutionaliza-
will happen," she adds.
The MRD is under the um-
brella of the Assistant
Medical Director, Dr.
Ronaldo G. Veneracion of
whom as per consensus of
the staff is ever-supportive
to all the endeavors with-
out counting the cost. He
remarked, “There’s always
a room for improvement
and we should not stop
improving even in a 100%
rating."
The inspectors noted that
the teamwork and coop-
eration of the heads and
staff alike is attributed to
the strong and consistent
management support.
MRD gets 100% on PHIC
ABOVE. SEHI nurses join hands
in protecting the environment
and preventing global warming.
Nurses join tree planting advocacy
BY MA. LEDY EMERY YUMANG
during the course of her
service.
The activity aimed to protect
the environment in response
to global warming and the
alarming number of floods
caused by illegal logging. It
was participated by the
Medical Society members,
the Philippine Nurses Asso-
ciation (PNA) members and
Philippine Nursing Student
Association(PNSA) mem-
bers. SEH representatives
were Ms. JoannSienes, RN,
Ms. Elvira Morales, RN, Mr.
ReyconradRacosas, RN, Ms.
Karla Matela, RN, Mr. Arthur
Fernandez, RN and Ms. Ar-
More than just knowing how
to save patients’ lives, SEHI
nurses have proven that they
too have the heart and com-
passion to care for the planet.
On January 22, 2012, SEHI
nurses, along with the Gen-
eral Santos City Medical So-
ciety,participated in the Tree
Planting Activity: Save the
Earth held ina three-hectare
landfill located at BarangaySi-
nawal, General Santos City.
The activity was spearheaded
by the medical society presi-
dent and also SEH chief of
clinics Dr. Ma. Helena Ven-
eracion-Garcia. It was a
jumpstart for Dr. Garcia’s
thrust in promoting environ-
mental care and protection
gentina Roma, RN.
Participants assembled in
front of GENMEDEX building
at around five in the morn-
ing. It was followed by a
convoy towards the area.
Amidst the pouring rain,
health workers gathered all
seedlings and planted them
across the land. The activity
promoted camaraderie
among the members of dif-
ferent organizations. Since
most physicians brought
with them their family mem-
bers, the activity also served
as a unique family bonding
experience.
BY ARGENTINA ROMA
GSCMS Pres. Ma. Helena Veneracion
Garcia, MD carries with her the
sprouts for a greener future through
the tree planting event.
4. Leading a life
Living in an era where everybody
seems to struggle in a fast operational pace,
everyone’s focus has mostly shifted at the
quality of their work and has taken much
less attention on the quality of life they
lead. Though work is an essential part of
life, it’s a different thing when you place the
thought the other way around. The quest
for advancement in work performance must
be rooted from the desire to boost up the
totality of our existence.
In search for financial progression which
may aid in economy improvement, strate-
gies had been schemed in order to enhance
service quality, productivity, safety and reli-
ability. One of the commendable programs
was the 5S process structured by the Japa-
nese.
It is used to systematically achieve total or-
ganization, cleanliness, and standardization
in the workplace. Its practice leads to im-
provement and it boosts the morale of the
workers, promoting a sense of pride in their
work and ownership of their responsibili-
ties.
It has been continuously promoted because
it had generated a lot of positive effects.
Looking at it closely, one will be able to real-
ize that this process could also be inte-
grated into our personal lives.
The 5S can do more than just solve institu-
tion’s housekeeping issues and resource
care. The essence of the plot once prac-
ticed, could actually have a great impact on
each one’s journey.
The first S is SEIRI or
SORT. It is an ac-
tion to identify and
eliminate unnecessary
items from your work-
place. A famous author
once noted that we have
to know our purpose for
being and we should learn
how to reach the end of the line feeling victorious for we have fulfilled our life’s mean-
ing. Oftentimes, we don’t get inspired to move forward because a lot of obstacles are
blocking our way. Sometimes the clutters in our life that we needed to sort are those
that are invisible to the eye yet monstrous enough to scare and halt us from keeping
our eyes on the goal. These are unnecessary items that keep on holding us back.
These may include fear, pride, insecurities and distorted jaded perceptions on life. Sort
these things and let them go. Free yourself
The second S is SEITON or
SYSTEMATIZED. It
is an action to put every necessary
item in good order. This life is yours
to live. Opt to live it, the excellent way.
You are endowed with opportunities for
you to take. Be the captain of your own
ship. Plan the map of your life. What you
will become in the future is the fruit of
your thoughts and the choices that you
make now. So in everything you do, do it
right the first time.
way
The third S is SEISO or
SWEEP. It is an action to
clean your workplace thoroughly.
This part of the system emphasizes that
we should not wait for things to get dirty.
It’s the same thing with your life; don’t
wait till everything is all messed up.
Strive to work out things before problems
arise. Develop attitudes that will yield
career efficiency and aid in nurturing
your relationships with others.
The fourth S is SEIKETSU or SANITIZE. It is a condition where a
high standard of good housekeeping is maintained. This part of the system
uses visual control signs and fool proofing to maintain outstanding work performance.
In this same way, we should also direct our lives with values that will help us avoid
committing mistakes. Life is a game of temptations and so we have to be strong and
stand our grounds against it. Solely, we may be feeble but with God’s guidance we will
surely be able to combat those wicked encounters.
The fifth S is SHITSUKE or SELF DISCIPLINE. It
is a condition where the 4S is practiced spontaneously and willingly as a
way of life. The only way that we can sustain a worthy life is by bearing in our hearts
the weight of the lessons brought by each step. Let us walk through this life guided by
these principles. Let us choose to be grateful for what we have rather than to grumble,
to respond to the needs of others than to rant about their difference and lastly, to bless
the world amidst all the troubles present. From now on, be challenged to
become living examples of 5S. Page 4
BY ARGENTINA ROMA
5. mayor, pulmonologist, spends her
time discussing on “Pneumonia”.
More lined up lectures were set
early this year, Dr. Ronaldo G.
Veneracion, urologist, talked about
“Urinary Tract Infection” last Janu-
ary 25, 2012. This February, Dr.
Analyza Galia, endocrinologist, will
present her views on "Self Man-
agement of Diabetes”. Patients,
health care providers and care
givers are encouraged to take ad-
vantage of this opportunity to re-
ceive information on the latest
trends of these diseases, to de-
velop health care plans and other
skills that will minimize catastro-
phic complications. The lectures
will be followed by questions and
answers. Admission is free. Pa-
tients’ council is an informal as-
sembly of patients and their fami-
lies organized and coordinated by
the Quality Assurance Office with
the participation of a multi-
disciplinary group composed of
physicians, nurses and other sup-
port groups.
The St. Elizabeth Hospital staff
conducted a series of patients’
council at Retro Hall, Training
Center, SEHI Compound as a
venue for the patients to express
their views and opinions regard-
ing their health condition and to
encourage patient and family
members to know more about
their illness, get involve in their
care and create awareness.
Spearheaded by Ms. Czakei Faye
Patino RND, Training Officer,
several speakers were invited
namely Dr. Annie Yabut who dis-
cussed on “Silent killer- Hyper-
tension”. A fun-filled lecture
about “Family Planning” was
shared by Ms. Mae R. Lomboy,
RN, the SEHI Lactation specialist.
Re-echoing the seminar she at-
tended from Manila, Ms. Joann
Sienes, RN lectured on “Multi-
drug-resistant Tuberculosis in the
Philippines”. Meanwhile, Dr. An-
gelito Balay expertly tackled on
“Acute Gastroenteritis (AGE)”.
Ms. Mayniel Bayudan shows her
expertise on “Tuberculosis” and
lastly, Dr. Ma. Antonietta Monte-
SEHI INITIATES PATIENTS’ COUNCIL
JCV CELEBRATES BIRTHDAY
Dr. Jesus C. Veneracion, medical director, cele-
brates his 78th birthday last January 11, 2012 .
Dr. Veneracion , who has been in the service for
49 years, is one of the pillars for the many suc-
cesses achieved by the hospital.
The celebration started off with a thanksgiving
mass officiated by Rev. Fr. Ivan Obando, OP and
Rev. Fr. Ching Salibay, OP at the hospital chapel.
In attendance during the mass were the family of
Dr. Veneracion including numerous presence of
SEHI employees and the family’s friends which completely filled up the chapel.
A short program and a luncheon was then held at the Retro Hall which was
highlighted by the birthday messages and wishes of the dedicated employees
and celebrants’ friends. Dr. Veneracion gave a short speech after the program.
In his message, he challenged all the employees to have more focus on their
work and to adhere on quality service.
This year, the medical director's birthday was declared as special working
holiday.
November 17, 2011 – Employees of St. Elizabeth Hos-
pital Inc. in General Santos City were involved in a
series of activities in commemoration of our pa-
troness, St. Elizabeth of Hungary.
The day was started with Hataw Exercise at
4:30am and a Fun Run in downtown General
Santos. After the work-out, “Kapehan sa Elizabeth”
followed where the employees gathered for a
steaming cup of coffee and some snacks.
At around 6:00am, free screenings for Diabetes
and Hypertension were provided and a Gift-Giving
activity followed which gave smiles to over a hun-
dred in-patients and indigent children from all
over the city. A thanksgiving mass was then of-
fered in the afternoon attended by active em-
ployees and devotees of the patron saint at the
hospital’s chapel.
To recognize their unwavering loyalty to St. Eliza-
beth Hospital Inc, thirty-two hospital personnel
who have served the hospital for ten years or
more were awarded for their noteworthy dedica-
tion and service to the institution.
(List of Employees Recognized and their corre-
sponding Length of Service)
NAME OF EMPLOYEE LENGTH OF SERVICE
(in years)
Almeria, Paquito D. 30
Bolio, Helen B. 25
Alcala, Janet M. 20
Retuya, Julio P. 20
Barot, Reynaldo V. 20
Caro, Eddie V. 20
Escleto, Jocevita T. 15
Dulalas, Rey D. 15
Pelomida, Theresa C. 15
Angeles, Alex Sr. R. 15
Bayudan, Mayniel A. 10
Salavia, Teresa S. 10
Solivio, Ulbedina E. 10
Niñal, Evimar G. 10
Bitalac, Joel B. 10
Cadotdot, Ramil O. 10
Reyes, Juditho L. 10
Sierte, Dinnes L. 10
Academia, Artemio A. 10
Catampatan, Antonio C. 10
Dorilag, Tom H. 10
Glorio, Liezl C. 10
Hechanova, Alvin A. 10
Ordiz, Loreto O. 10
Laude, Santiago Jr. H. 10
Aballe, Faustina G. 10
Tubon, Emilia V. 10
Dela Cerna, Mary Grace, J. 10
Maningding, Cecilia L. 10
Garcia, Maria Helena Veneracion 10
Palencia, Hector Pantilan 10
Page 5
SEHI Celebrates 49th
Patronal Fiesta
BY NEIL ARINZOL
BY NEIL ARINZOL
BY LEVIEN GAIL LEDESMA
6. The first stage involved cleaning the entire
premises of the hospital. The second stage
of the race was mind games such as puzzles
and the famed Pinoy henyo. The last stage of
the games, apparently the most challenging,
involved catching a pig, climbing poles, egg
harvesting, thrusting your hand into a box of
cockroaches to obtain a coin, and having a
snake wrapped around your shoulders while
answering a question.
In the end, the Orange team proved to be the
victor, winning Php 8,000.00 in cash. Com-
ing in second was the Violet team raking in
Php 6,000.00. Third place was the Grey
team, winning Php 4,000.00. In fourth place
was the Yellow team securing themselves
Php 2,000.00.
The month of June saw the bowling competi-
tion that was held at Tokyok Super Lanes. In
the end, the Orange team took home the
crown.
The Oval Plaza City Court played host to the
volleyball games that took place last July
when the Yellow team seized the top spot on
the said sport. Badminton and Table tennis
were the sports played during the month of
August held at Big Shot Badminton Court.
Each sport had men and women competing
in teams. Emerging champion in men’s bad-
minton was the Yellow team. The Orange
team won in women’s badminton. The Grey
team placed first in women’s table tennis,
while the Orange team triumphed in men’s
table tennis.
No event was held from September onwards.
Indoor games such as dart and chess are
still to be done.
The Cheerdancing competition will highlight
the Sportsfest celebration during the finals on
May 2012. Winners of the respective events
will be awarded on the culmination of the
Sportsfest during the launching of the 50th
Foundation Day celebration of St. Elizabeth
Hospital, Inc.
In an industry where staff turnover
is but fleeting, sometimes it’s inevitable that
comradeship goes weak.
As part of an enduring tradition which aims
to imbue the spirit of camaraderie and
sportsmanship among its employees, St.
Elizabeth Hospital, Inc. launched its annual
Sportsfest celebration last May 12, 2011
during the institution’s 49th
Foundation Day
celebration. “The Sportsfest is not only held
just because it is hospital tradition,” said Mr.
Dennis Louie Hudieres, program organizer,
“but is also held for the benefit of its employ-
ees.”
“It gives us a chance to enjoy and have fun
after a day’s work. Furthermore, it gives us
the opportunity to meet and socialize with
new employees of the hospital,” he added.
The actualization of this tradition, Mr.
Hudieres asserted, could not have been
made possible without the help of the depart-
ment heads: Ms. Maieth Conlu and Mr.
Nonoy Panday from the Business Office; Mr.
Joel Bitalac and Mr. Arvin Pineda from the
General Service Office; Ms. Aster May Aso
and Ms. Elvira Morales from the Nursing
Service Office; and Mr. Nards Perez from the
Diagnostics. “The Sportsfest could have
been scrapped from last year’s activities if
not for the insistence of the employees and
their department heads,” revealed Mr.
Hudieres.
Realization
A four-way battle among the Business Office
(the Orange team), the Nursing Service Office
(the Violet team), the General Service Office
(the Yellow team), and the Diagnostics De-
partment (the Grey team), the Sportsfest
kicked off last May 11, 2011 with the Amaz-
ing Race.
The Amazing Race, an idea from Chief of
Clinics Dr. Ma. Helena Veneracion-Garcia, is
a game that would test not only one’s agility
and physical strength, but also one’s intellec-
tual acuity. It was made up of three stages.
SportsFest: The Show Will Go On!
By Ms. Pamela Aquino, RN
Page 6
7. Chapter 1: The Beginning of Wonder
At the strike of six in the evening, the employees have transformed into enchanted mor-
tals, prince and princesses, witches and wizards, fairies, and exquisite charmed beings
– all excited to join and witness the night’s festivities of splendour and bliss.
The series of spectacular events began with a production number of excerpts inspired by
Disney’s magical world. A three-part presentation beginning with a stunning waltz to the
tune of Beauty and the Beast, a hip-swaying sing and dance number from Hercules,
capped off by a duo performance of a love shared between Ariel and Eric from the Little
Mermaid. Most certainly, it was a start of what lies ahead.
Chapter II: A Pageant of Creatures
Lights were then turned off. An unfamiliar sound of enchantment then arose from the
midst of the ballroom and with it came forth winged beings from the Nursing Service,
creatures known as Avariels, the most striking of the elven races with their soft, feathered
wings.
Cheers from the entire kingdom could be heard as these beings take a long walk show-
casing their utmost radiance. As their sound came to a halt, two familiar faces then
emerged from afar, the hero and heroine known to many as Alladin and Jasmine from the
Diagnostics.
Garbed in their luxurious Arabian attire and coupled with a splendid musical play of the
song A Whole New World, the couple took their position up on the stage for everyone to
see and remember the love they both shared.
After some time, a famous fictional character wearing a green mini dress and a magic
wand arose; the common fairy named Tinkerbell was escorted by Peter Pan’s arch neme-
sis, Captain Hook. The townsmen from the Logistics were in a riot cheering for their bet.
How ironic the combination of Tinkerbell and Captain
Hook but no unfortunate events were brought about
for the reason they all came was to celebrate.
Then there came along the princes and princesses
from the fairyland of Business Office. Strolling down
the aisle are these mythical creatures human in ap-
pearance but having magical powers, dressed with
colourful silks and butterfly wings.
Chapter III: The Feast
A bountiful feast was also prepared for all of the crea-
tures. Scrumptious delicacies were served for them to
enjoy. To set the mood for the continuation of the
night’s celebration a parade of magical winged beings
was witnessed; truly a feast for the tummy and the
eyes.
Chapter IV: The Crowning of Honours
The next prepared event was a showcase of talents,
wherein representatives from the different groups are
given the challenge of combining modern music with
traditional Christmas Carols. It was indeed a close
fight amongst all of the contenders. The announce-
ment of the winners then followed.
The 5S Parol Competition Winners were announced,
the Clinical Laboratory came out on top. The Avariels
were announced as the best in magical costume and
the group from the Logistics topped all of the con-
tenders for the Dance Competition.
A surprise announcement of the Prince and Princess
of the Night, Villain of the Night, Magical Disney Char-
acter and Fairest of them All was also brought about.
Major Prizes for twenty-six lucky individuals were also
set to be given away where winners can bring home
Air-conditioners, Refrigerators and many more appli-
ances and gadgets.
Chapter V: The True Magic of Christmas
The night came close to the end as everyone sang
together as a community with “Sa Araw ng Pasko”
and “Christmas in our Hearts”.
A time for merry-making and joyful dance was also
granted to all those who came. Indeed it was a night
of grandeur and merriment, however the true spark of
magic is found within the hearts of the entire SEHI
family, for the happiness and love that the one true
Creator had bestowed upon His creatures. And
though the magical night had already come to a won-
derful end, the spirit of sharing magic to those we
meet in our everyday lives would hopefully still shine
through.
A Night of Magical Christmas
Page 7
BY DESIREE JOYA GO
8. Public or Private?
A patient’s relative de-
sires to transfer his pa-
tient from the ward to
another room:
Nurse: “Sir, anong gusto
niyong room na lipatan?
Overheard at SEH
One would think a hospital as a gloomy and
morbid place. But at St. Elizabeth’s, that isn’t
the always case.
Minus Points
Social worker: “Good afternoon, Ma’am! Pasok po
kayo.”
Client: “Maayong hapon, Ma’am. Gikan na ko ug PCSO.
Mangayo unta ko ug MEDICAL SUBTRACT.”
Weird X-ray
A nurse is accompanying a patient for x-ray of
the sinuses.
Nurse: “Ma’am, patient Santos nandito na po!”
Radtech: “Ah, unsa gani na iyang procedure?”
Nurse: “Ma’am, mao ni tung WATCHER’S
VIEW!” (correct term: Water’s View)
Medicinal Fruit
During rounds, the doctor ordered: Include banana in the diet. Carrying out the
doctor’s order, the nurse trainee asks the senior nurse, “Ma’am, mag-drug study
pa ako ng banana?”
Soft Words
As the morning shift draws to a
close, the nurse-on-duty fol-
lowed up the attending physi-
cian who had not yet made
their hospital visit.
Nurse’s SMS: “Good PM po,
doc. SEH Station ** po. Gentle
reminder lang po doc not yet
seen pa po si patient ***** of
room ***.”
Doctor’s SMS: “Gentle reply.
Coming.”
Wrong Guy
After being informed by the
ER staff to prepare a com-
plete set of oxygen for the
admission, Nurse 1 began to
look for a janitorial staff.
Nurse 1: (spotting a male in
white shirt, jeans, and rubber
shoes) “Sir! Sir!”
Male: (approaches the nurse)
“Unsa, Ma’am?”
Nurse 1: “Pabutang daw ko ug
oxygen sa room ***.”
Male: (stares at Nurse 1, nods
his head and walks away)
Nurse 2 to Nurse 1: “Wui!
Watcher man to ni patient
*****!”
BY PAMELA AQUINO
Twisted Translation
A nurse instructs a patient to never
forget to do deep breathing exer-
cises. “Sir, ayaw kalimot ug gin-
Liking it Raw
The patient’s diet was changed from General Liquids to Diet As Tolerated
with two hard boiled eggs per day.
Nurse: (instructing) “Ma’am, pakan-a siya’g itlog ha.”
Presumably Wrong Findings
A patient’s chest x-ray result showed no significant chest findings.
Frustrated because of the persistence of cough despite negative
results, he vents out his feelings to the nurse.
Patient: “Unsa ba na inyong x-ray? Makit-an ba na niya kung naa koy
plemas? Daghan-daghan baya akong plemas, ga-yellow na. Naabot
na diri akong plemas.” (touches his cheeks and forehead)
Nurse: “Maabot diay dira ‘tay imong plemas?”
Patient: “Oo! Abot jud! Daghan kaayo! Unsa mana inyong x-ray mu-
ingon nga wala koy pulmonary nga naa man koy pulmonary!”
NOSE-BLEED
A patient was
admitted due
to nosebleed. A
nurse asks the
mother,
“Ma’am, asa
nagasunggo ang
bata? sa ilong?”
Misprinted
Nurse 1: I-start na ning tambal ni pt. ***, murag
makaIELTS jud ka ani, Norwegian ingon sa face sheet.
Nurse 2: (Enters the room) Good evening maam, I am
going to give your antibiotic, but before that we have to
perform a skin test to know if you are allergic or not.
(Performs the skin test)
Patient: Aguyy! Sakita oi.
Nurse 2: (Ngee! Bisaya man diay ni.)
Nurse 1: Maam, nanawag ang admitting, pakambyuhan
ang face sheet, Pinoy man diay to.
The Gazette
Daryl Panerio
Editor in Chief
Livien Gail Ledesma
Associate Editor
Ma. Leda Emery Yumang
Managing Editor
Joann Sienes
Circulation Editor
Neil Arinzol
News Editor
Argentina Roma
Features Editor
Pamela Aquino
Literary Editor
Juvie May Bonifacio
Layout Editor
Crispy Dequilla
Cartoonist
Staff Writers:
Kathlyn Chloe Fontanilla
Mae Lomboy
Francis Joseph Faeldonia
Allan Fenequito
Mark Reuben Arat
EDITORIAL CONSULTANTS
Ma. Helena Veneracion-Garcia, MD
Ronaldo Veneracion, MD