teaching management lessons via Jokes

1. A.C.M.S.A.C.M.S.
Albanian Center forAlbanian Center for
Management ServicesManagement Services

2. Great Truth aboutGreat Truth about
RevenueRevenue
ManagementManagement
SystemsSystems
brought to us by variousbrought to us by various
cartoonistscartoonists

3. Nothing can stop automationNothing can stop automation

4. Computer toolsComputer tools
make work easiermake work easier

5. It does‘nt pay to buy theIt does‘nt pay to buy the
cheapest productcheapest product
Your trial period is overYour trial period is over
Please register nowPlease register now
OKOK

6. Don‘t set too ambitiousDon‘t set too ambitious
deadlinesdeadlines
Deadline is deadline !

7. A nice guy often hides lack ofA nice guy often hides lack of
functionalityfunctionality

8. Always listen to the MarketAlways listen to the Market

9. You can‘t hide any bug fromYou can‘t hide any bug from
usersusers
It‘s no use whistling –It‘s no use whistling –
I can see the bubbles comingI can see the bubbles coming
out of your bottom.out of your bottom.

10. Users don‘t like bugsUsers don‘t like bugs
Access
denied
O.k., and now you‘ll do
exactly what I‘m telling you !

11. Simulation expertice helpsSimulation expertice helps

12. Not every presentation isNot every presentation is
successfulsuccessful

13. Web-ability is a mustWeb-ability is a must

14. What suits one customerWhat suits one customer
might not suit the nextmight not suit the next

15. Look for efficient solutionsLook for efficient solutions

16. Support different situationsSupport different situations
by specific toolsby specific tools

17. Build in a help functionBuild in a help function

18. On-line help can be usefulOn-line help can be useful

19. Forecasting andForecasting and
optimization are complexoptimization are complex
Come on! It can‘t goCome on! It can‘t go
wrong every time...wrong every time...

20. Select significant attributes forSelect significant attributes for
your forecasteryour forecaster
Which one
Is mine?

21. Maths is not everythingMaths is not everything

22. Use check-lists for testingUse check-lists for testing
ears
neck
feet

23. Call us for more details onCall us for more details on
management solutionsmanagement solutions
• Should you need any further assistance, please feel free to let meShould you need any further assistance, please feel free to let me
knowknow..
• Kindest RegardsKindest Regards,,
•
•
• EldaElda GjokaGjoka
Operations ManagerOperations Manager
•
• ACMSACMS -- AlbanianAlbanian CenterCenter for Management Services ltdfor Management Services ltd..
• AddressAddress:: RrRr. ". "Leke DukagjiniLeke Dukagjini"" PallPall.. 11/1, Kati 511/1, Kati 5.. TiraneTirane
•
• PhonePhone:: 00 355 4 255 65500 355 4 255 655
FaxFax:: 00 355 4 271 96000 355 4 271 960
MobMob:: 00 355 68 40 49 09100 355 68 40 49 091
•

24. A.C.M.S.A.C.M.S.
Albanian Center forAlbanian Center for
Management ServicesManagement Services
Thank youThank you