1. Respectful Workplace ForEes. — Presentation Transcript
1. Hostile or a Respectful Workplace? Presented by LifeServicesEAPMargieRoop, LPCC-S, CEAP; SAP1-800-822-
4847www.lifeserviceseap.com
2. Training ObjectivesIncrease understanding of difference between disrespectful (hostile) and respectful
behavior.Increase understanding of the impact disrespectful behavior has on you, your work and others.Identify your
role and responsibility in creating and maintaining a respectful workplace.Learn tools for creating a more respectful
work environment.
3. Why Should I Care?Increased commitment to job/higher job satisfactionMore productive on the jobHigher
satisfaction with personal/professional developmentHigher trust of supervisor/coworkersMore comfortable in providing
feedback and ideasAvoid a lawsuit!
4. Why should I care?Feel more secure about my job.Alignment of my career plans with that of institution Less
absenteeismImprovedmoraleFewer work-family conflicts/stress
5. Factors to consider:Past experiences-how you were influenced?Norms/values that you
adoptedPolices/regulations/procedures/lawsOwn needs/motivations/self-confidenceCultural/socialization-sex, religion,
ethnicityPosition in organization
6. Why people are disrespectfulPersonalityTraitsMotivesInsecureDepressedLack of empathyClueless/lack of
insightParanoiaSelf-loathingPower&control“Pumpself up”Self-righteousnessBe left alone: repel othersConfidenceBe
seen in the spotlight
7. How do you feel when someone is:Derogatory about your ethnic
background?Gender?Age?Physicalcharacteristics?Religion?Physicalappearance?Physicalabilities?Intellectualabilities?
Be honest!
Do you…
Feel uncomfortable? Angry?
Speak up?
Walk away?
Struggle with what IS appropriate and not?
Find yourself unbothered?
Avoid those who offend?
Enjoin those disrespecting others?
When someone else is the object of offense, do you…
Laugh along with everybody else?
Walk away?
Confront the offender?
Report this behavior to superiors?
Just think the person is “thin-skinned?”
Examples of Disrespectful Behavior
Body language
Disrespectful listening
Gossip/putting others in bad light
Invasion of privacy/personal space
Avoid/ignore others
Putdowns/hurtful statements or humor
More on the Continuum:
Fault-finding; negativity
Criticism or mocking in front of others
“Know-it-all”/superiority attitude
Obvious (to others) power struggles
Unwanted imposition of beliefs/values
Misuse of power/position
Sexual Harassment; Hostile Work Environment
Sex, Age, Disability, or Religious Discrimination
Continuum……
Misdirected anger-”projection”
Discrimination/harassment
Outbursts of anger/rage

2. Veiled threats
Direct threats
Physical violence
Why Disrespectful Behavior is Not Addressed
“It’s Justified.” “She deserved it.”
Role modeling/normative for that workplace
Own needs/motivations/feel self-confident
Not taking responsibility for own behavior
Ignore it and it’ll go away.
Ignorance
More reasons…
Lack of tools/training
Don’t understand nor care about impact on workplace/individuals.
Lack of confidence in other’s responses (no support within work group including management).
Fear of hurting other’s feelings; not being taken seriously; being blamed
Fear of retaliation.
More on “Projection”
A classic defense mechanism
Persons externalize negative feelings about themselves onto others.
Personal foundation is flawed, so insecurity is great.
Projection: Classic Defense Mechanism
Persons have need to feel better about themselves; only way they know (learned behavior) is through disrespecting others.
It’s easier to focus “self-negativity” or self-loathing onto others than to face it themselves.
Why do people not feel good about themselves?
Pick your issue!
We could fill libraries on this!
Victim of domestic violence, physical, emotional, or sexual abuses?
Living with an alcoholic, drug abuser, gambler, “spend-a-holic” or otherwise disrespectful spouse?
What other stressors can you think of?
The Individual Impact
Stress/anxiety
Fatigue/apathy
Avoidance
Withdrawal
Self-esteem
Retaliation
Less job commitment
Anger
Powerlessness
Less productive
Fear
Lose trust/respect
Less communication
Absenteeism
The Workplace Impact
Productivity
Job turnover
Customer service
Grievances
Misuse of time
Absenteeism
Morale
Fear/uncertainty
Conflict
Less group work
Communication
Factions
Power struggles
Less caring
Suspicion/hostility
Less committed
The Impact on Institution
Public relations
Morale
Legal expenses

3. Recruitment
Higher use of medical benefits
Productivity
Factions
Loss of trust/respect
Grievances
Turnover costs
Safety issues
How do you respond when…..
When you see offending behavior at WORK what do you do?
Ignore?
Deny it?
Chime in?
Laugh?
Do YOU tell offending jokes?
Do YOU bully others?
What to do….
Helpful?
Or, harmful?
Get educated on what IS or IS NOT appropriate!
Do not ignore it!
Say something right away to the offending party or parties to STOP IT!
Speak to offending party (ies) in more depth in a confidential setting.
Report it to management.
Everyone: Needs to Lead the way!
Ignoring the problem will only make things worse…
You will lose respect.
You could incite workplace violence.
If you join offending parties in offensive behaviors, you are complicit and could get sued!
Management
Educate your staff on what is/is not appropriate.
Show them that you take this behavior seriously.
Utilize discipline as appropriate up to and including the management referral
Seek advice from your HR Department!
One-on-One
How YOU communicate
What you communicate
Makes all the difference in the world.
Either demonstrates your knowledge or your ignorance.
Sets the tone for your department.
Employees either feel safe or fearful.
Are you sending a message that to “be part of the group” one must be offensive to others?
Either produces or reduces departmental stress.
Either enhances or destroys departmental morale.
Continuum of Respectful Behavior
Your Everyday Behavior
Towards persons who offend
Personal responsibility
Integrity
Positivity
Honesty
Accessibility
Inclusion
Credibility
Objectivity
Active listening
Assertive communication
Limit setting
Seeking assistance with management
Management Referral to EAP?

4. Active Listener?
Body language
Encouraging words
Inviting, open-ended questions
Restate what was said.
Check out for mutual understanding.
Summarize
Assertive Communicator?
Objectivity
Clarify your wants/needs
Responsibility for OWN behavior communication
Speak directly with person involved
“I” statements
Assertive Communicator?
Identify type of communication occurring.
Stay focused on issue.
Problem-solving
Establish boundaries/consequences.
Mutual understanding of conversation
Problem Solver?
Identify the real problem or its source.
Identify all possible solutions.
Discuss possible outcome of each solution.
Mutually agree upon a solution and implement it.
Develop implementation plan.
Evaluate
Can you reframe a situation?
Identify situation that produces uncomfortable or distressing feelings.
Identify your automatic focus, thoughts, and feelings about situation.
Identify a more useful way to view this situation which offers you choices and the potential for growth.
Do YOU feel lack of power?
Do YOU feel bullied by your employees?
Feel pressure to “chime in” to their behaviors?
Feel ostrisized when you don’t laugh at their inappropriate jokes?
Feel powerless to do anything about it?
A good rule of thumb: What if it were:
Your wife or husband
Your son or daughter
Your mother or father
How would you feel?
What makes it different to have someone else be the butt of disrespect?
Why do your co-workersnot deserve a respectful workplace?
You have got to take a stand!
If you are struggling with “doing things differently” now that you’ve heard this lecture-FANTASTIC!
If it makes you feel uncomfortable-BETTER YET!
If you want some help figuring things out and wanting direction-WAY TO GO!
CallLifeServices EAP!
For affirmation of your thoughts & feelings.
For education on how to best approach situations both in the workplace and family or social situations.
You deserve a safe & respectful workplace!!
Call LifeServices EAP
1-800-822-4847 24 hours a day!
Go out, do great things & enjoy your life!