Giving effective feedback workbook

Feedback Webinar
To Learn How to use this feedback workbook Join me on my Free Webinar
Friday, Feb 10th, 1pm to 2pm
It’s a known fact that people who are open to feedback are more successful in their interpersonal
relationships than those who are closed. So if it’s important for you to manage, motivate and build
relationships easily, find out what feedback really is and how to give it so that it makes a difference.
Learn the difference between feedback and praise. What’s ‘feedforward’ and how is that best requested?
How do you give constructive/negative feedback to someone about their performance so that they can take
responsibility and act to make changes?

Results you can trust
Eleanor has worked as a coach for more than 10 years having qualified as an NLP Coach and NLP Trainer
in 2001. Since then she has run numerous team events and facilitated meetings helping teams to engage
more fully through being open and honest and building trust and support so that people feel able to give and
receive feedback.

Good for You, Good for the Whole Team
This type of webinar can also be used with whole teams who want to build greater self-
awareness, understanding of others and having a common language within the team.
Learn how to give feedback so that it’s not taken personally

 Open up the blind spots that you may have (we all have them)
 Engage more openly with others

The Feedback Webinar is FREE Click Here to Find out More About my
Feedback Webinar

www.keytalent-partners.com 01344 774 999 Giving Effective Feedback - Page 2 of 21

Eleanor Yearwood
Executive Coach

Eleanor is a business consultant specialising in executive coaching and leadership
development, Eleanor is committed to working with individuals who want to grow,
learn and develop themselves, their people and their business.

As a certified NLP Coach and Trainer she works with board members, senior leaders
and high potential managers to enable them to achieve measurable long-lasting
change. As a member of the International Coaching Federation, Eleanor coaches from
a position of compassion, strength and support. Whether coaching on a one to one
basis or running a team event, Eleanor‟s clients benefit both professionally and
personally from my wide range of skills, knowledge and experience.

Coaching and training over the past nine years:
 Board Member and Leadership Teams within large blue chip organisations to enable
them to achieve long lasting and measurable change. Sectors including Finance,
Risk, Marketing, Transaction banking and Public Sector.
 Eleanor has also developed and delivered client focused programmes in leadership,
team development and behavioural change.

Qualifications:
Certified Trainer and Coach of Neuro Linguistic Programming and licensed to
administer a number of psychometric tools such as Myers Briggs Type Indicator®,
FIRO-B® and DISC®

Testimonials

“Eleanor is a no-nonsense, practical executive coach. She sets tough goals - moving
from individual assessment through to the real actions required very smoothly and
quickly. Crucially, she helps you to understand potential issues and follows through
with suggestions on how to tackle them.” Davy Deegan, C&B Manager at Dell

"Eleanor's coaching has had a profound effect on me; I've worked with her for a
number of years and throughout that time she has been warm, knowledgeable,
patient and insightful. She has never hesitated to challenge assumptions or unhelpful
behaviours when she saw them, and frequently made me re-examine my actions or
beliefs when they were limiting my growth. While it's true that I have walked along
the path, it was definitely Eleanor who lit the way." Tony Smith, European
Technical Director, Perforce Software Ltd


Table of Contents

Eleanor Yearwood .......................................................................................... 3

Programme Outcomes ..................................................................................... 5

Feedback ..................................................................................................... 6
What is it? ................................................................................................ 6
Why Give Feedback? .................................................................................... 6
When to Give Feedback ................................................................................ 6

Giving Effective Feedback ................................................................................ 7
Feedback situations ..................................................................................... 7
Types of Feedback: ..................................................................................... 7

Examples of Good Feedback - Exercise ................................................................. 8

Poor Feedback - Exercise ................................................................................. 9

Common Mistakes When Giving Feedback ............................................................ 10

Why do we need Feedback?............................................................................. 11
The Johari Window .................................................................................... 11

Tips on giving effective feedback: .................................................................... 12

The Process of Giving Effective Feedback ........................................................... 13
Rapport – How to ensure your feedback is heard ................................................ 14

Tips .......................................................................................................... 15
Your Delivery Technique ............................................................................. 15

Behaviours that Demonstrate Open or Closed to Feedback ....................................... 16

Six reasons to Try Feedforward ........................................................................ 17

How to Get Feedforward ................................................................................ 18

Notes ........................................................................................................ 19


Programme Outcomes

After today you will be able to:

 Give effective feedback to your boss, peers, and colleagues without blame or
judgement.

 Understand why Giving Effective Feedback is your most important management
tool and skill.

 Be prepared to receive feedback that you can use for your own growth and
personal development.

Want – Need - Expect

... and what we agree to do if / when we don’t get our needs met


Feedback
What is it?
Feedback is the process of giving data to someone about the impact that they make
through their actions, attitude and words. In other words – it‟s information from their
perspective.

The worst feedback is personal and judgemental

The most effective feedback is subjective and descriptive

Used effectively, feedback is a powerful ongoing development tool. The greatest impact
can be gained from creating self-generated feedback from your questions, as this
encourages people to self-correct over time. Once someone is self-correcting, they can
really grow and improve.

Why Give Feedback?
 It‟s your most powerful tool to accelerate learning

 Without it, it‟s one of the top two reasons excellent performers leave their jobs

 It is a highly respectful way to help others succeed

 It helps to retain top performers

When to Give Feedback
 Frequently

 On time

 As an opportunity for development

 To solve a performance problem

Giving effective feedback requires the same attention to detail that you employ
when solving a business or technical problem


Giving Effective Feedback
It should therefore be an exciting path to learning and growth. Unfortunately, many
people dread any kind of feedback. We are accustomed to being „competent‟ adults
and want to do it right the first time. We can be hard on ourselves and take feedback
as a reflection of our personality faults.

Feedback situations

1. In the corridor (causal situation) passing a comment

2. In a team meeting where your views are sought

3. Bi-lateral - weekly / fortnightly meetings

4. Appraisal reviews - monthly /quarterly/ annual

5. Structured coaching sessions

6. Constructive /negative feedback discussion

7. Disciplinary meetings

Types of Feedback:
1. Feedback sandwich

2. Stop – Start – Continue

3. Constructive / negative feedback model

4. Feedforward

5. 4 Step Praise Model


Examples of Good Feedback - Exercise


Poor Feedback - Exercise
Most of us will have received less-than-helpful/discouraging feedback at one time or
another. Below are some poor feedback habits that you should consciously avoid.

 Making suggestions without asking
 Trying to improve too many aspects of performance
 Telling
 Sweeping generalisations
 Comparing performance with others
 Not giving regular feedback
 Telling people what their performance is
 Asking them why their performance is at its current level (people get
defensive)
 Delving too deep – you are not asking questions for their own sake but to
help the other person improve their performance.


Common Mistakes When Giving Feedback

 The feedback judges the individual, not the behaviour (eg You are very
abrasive in meetings)

 The feedback is too vague (eg You are a good leader)

 The feedback is second hand – heard from someone else (eg John said you are
confused about the project and your role.)

 The feedback is exaggerated with generalities (eg You always show up late for
meetings)

 The feedback analyses motives (eg You were inconsiderate by being late for
our meeting)

 The feedback goes on too long (eg blah, blah, blah...)

 The feedback implies a threat (eg Do you want to succeed in this organisation
or not?)

 The feedback is a question, not a statement (eg Do you think you could listen
next time I give instructions)

 Bringing your own experiences (eg I used to have the same problem)

 Cushioning the feedback (eg You‟re not going to like this)

 Delaying the feedback (eg Four years ago when we attended the trade show in
Las Vegas...)

 Giving advice with your feedback (eg Let me tell you what you need to do to
have a successful team meeting)


Why do we need Feedback?
Based on self-disclosure and feedback, the Johari Window is a communication tool that
can be used to improve understanding among individuals in working groups or teams.

Developed by Joseph Luft and Harry Ingram (the word “Johari” comes from Joseph Luft
and Harry Ingram), there are two key ideas behind the tool:

1. Individuals can build trust with others by disclosing information about
themselves
2. Individuals can learn about themselves with the help of feedback from others.

The Johari Window

Quadrant 1: Open Area
What is known by the person about him/herself and is also known by others. The Open Area is the
“space” where good communications and co-operations occur, free from confusion, conflict and
misunderstanding

Quadrant 2: Blind Area or “Blind Spot”
What is unknown by the person about him/herself but which others know. This can be simple
information, or can involve deeper issues that are difficult for individuals to face directly, and yet can be
seen by others.

Quadrant 3: Hidden or Avoided Area
What the person know about him/herself that others do not.

Quadrant 4: Unknown Area
What is unknown by the person about him/herself and is also unknown by others.


Tips on giving effective feedback:
 Ask permission to give feedback.
 Use your observations, and be specific and objective.
 Avoid emotive language.

Rather than offering your own observations, you could ask the other person for theirs. In
other words, encourage them to generate their own feedback.

Ask the other person:

 What worked?
 What didn‟t work?
 What might they have done differently that they could use next time?

This self-generated feedback is likely to lead to self-learning and development.


The Process of Giving Effective Feedback
Situation – Behaviour – Impact (SBI)

Simple - Direct - Effective

1. Capture the Situation: Where or when did the behaviour occur?

Yesterday morning while we were inspecting the building...
Last week, during our regular staff meeting...
Today when you and I were talking in your office...
Last weekend at the staff party...

2. Describe the Behaviour: What were the specific actions that were observed?

What can you see
What can you hear
What the person did or did not do
Words and non-verbal behaviours

3. Deliver the Impact: What were the consequences of the behaviour?

Make a statement about the person’s behaviour:

“When you turned in the report two days early, I felt as though you
understood the pressures I am under right now.”

“When you ended the conversation after only 5 minutes I wondered if you
were interested in my opinion.”

OR acknowledge the emotional affect the behaviour had on you:

“When you asked my opinion this morning I felt included and like a full
member of the team.”

“When you told me my concerns were overblown, I felt belittled.”


How to Build the Feedback Relationship

 Strike a balance between positive feedback (specific comments on a job well
done) and feedback about problematic behaviour that needs to be addressed.
Ideally feedback is 4:1, positive to negative.

 Leverage strength. Give people credit for everything they do right.

Rapport – How to ensure your feedback is heard


Tips
Your Delivery Technique

 Remember your only reason for giving feedback is to help another person succeed

 Find a private setting and give your undivided attention

 Soften the opening. (eg “Mary, may I share an observation with you?”)

 Acknowledge the uneasiness or discomfort you might feel. “I am aware that I am
uncomfortable”

 Be prepared to offer suggestions and support for changing behaviour in case of a
performance problem.

 Recognise that people process information differently.

 Your choice of words might be the least important part of the feedback

 After you‟ve given the feedback, reflect on how it went and if it did not go as
planned, decide what you will do differently next time.

 Recognise that you do not have to be “comfortable” to give feedback; it‟s your
job.


Behaviours that Demonstrate Open or Closed to
Feedback
Open Closed
Look interested; demonstrate an Show polite interest, while inwardly
+1 -1
open posture preparing your rebuttal
Summarize key points without Explain how the person
+2 -2
interjecting your ideas misperceived the situation
Express your appreciation for the
Justify and excuse the situation by
+3 message regardless of the tone of -3
providing a “logical” reason
delivery
Express genuine curiosity about ways Interpret what the person says and
+4 -4
to resolve the issue an undeserved attack
Openly wonder about your role in
+5 -5 Interrupt to give your perspective
creating the issue
Request information and examples in
Make snippy replies and non-verbally
+6 an effort to understand (not to -6
show your irritation
defend what you did)
Take full responsibility for the results
+7 -7 Blame someone or something else
that were created
Think out loud, making new
+8 -8 Intimidate or attack the messenger
associations about the issue
Show genuine enthusiasm about Complain about the decision and
+9 -9
making a change criticise people not present
Implement (plan action, request Comply with no real commitment to
+10 -10
support and follow-up) do what you say you‟ll do

Taken from ‘Radical Change Radical Results’ written by Kate Ludeman and Eddie Erlandson


Six reasons to Try Feedforward
By Marshall Goldsmith

1. We can change the future. We can’t change the past.

Feedforward helps people envision and focus on a positive future, not a failed
past. By giving people ideas on how they can be even more successful we can
increase their chance of achieving this success in the future.

2. It can be more productive to help people be “right” than prove they were
“wrong”

Even constructively delivered feedback is often seen as a negative as it
necessarily involves a discussion of mistakes, shortfalls and problems.
Feedforward on the other hand, is almost always seen as a positive because it
focuses on solutions – not problems.

3. Feedforward is especially suited to successful people

Successful people like getting ideas that are aimed at helping them achieve their
goals. We all tend to accept feedback that is consistent with the way we see
ourselves.

4. Feedforward can come from anyone who knows about the task. It does not
require personal experience with the individual

One very common positive reaction to feedforward is that participants are
amazed by how much they can learn. For example, if you want to be a better
listener almost any fellow leader can give you ideas on how you can improve.
Feedforward just requires having good ideas for achieving the task.

5. People do not take feedforward as personally as feedback

If not delivered well, feedback can be taken personally. Successful people‟s
sense of identity is highly connected with their work. Feedforward cannot
involve a personal critique, since it is discussing something that has not yet
happened.

6. Feedforward can cover almost all of the same “material” as feedback.

Imagine you have just made a terrible presentation in front of the executive
committee. Your manager is in the room. Rather than make you “relive” this
experience, your manager might help you prepare for future presentations by
giving you suggestions for the future. These suggestions can be very specific and
still delivered in a positive helpful way.


How to Get Feedforward
Feedback is important for growth and development. However it focuses on what has
already occurred in the past not on the vast possibilities of the future. Feed-forward
gives suggestions for the future in a helpful and supportive manner – focusing on making
a positive difference going forward

Who to ask for it
 A person whose opinion you respect

 Someone with credibility and integrity

 Someone with a different work style

 Someone you trust

 Someone with whom you must interact in order for you both to be successful

 Someone who has had the opportunity to observe you in action

When to ask for it
After you‟ve identified a development goal (through reflection, a 360 survey and
another assessment

How to ask for it
 Start with one goal. Be specific about the goal.

 State your goal and ask another person for his or her observations

What to do with it
 Be curious!

 Consider accuracy (eg On what is the information based?)

 Consider importance (Is it helpful? Relevant? Do you want to know more?)

 Decide what you will do with it. (anything? Not all information should be acted
upon. Even if you don‟t like it, some feedback cannot be ignored)

 Do not make excuses or try to explain. Simply listen

 Thank the person for his or her contribution.


Notes


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Giving effective feedback workbook