Educational session for parks and recreation professionals and youth sports league administrators about parents. Proactive and reactive measures for dealing with parent behavior issues.
Also introduces the Parents Association for Youth Sports (PAYS) training and membership program of the National Alliance for Youth Sports (NAYS).
www.nays.org/parents
11. Reactive Measures for Dealing
with Parents
Complete training program
Remove parent from game/event
Suspension
Yellow/red cards
Personal meeting
Require parent to sign behavior
contract
“Silent Saturdays” no cheering at
all
12. Desirable Parent
Behaviors
Supportive/ encouraging
Be a positive role model
Compliment ALL
players, coaches, officials
Leave coaching to the coaches
Volunteer
Treat young athletes like children, not
mini-professionals
Be realistic about child’s future in
sports
Emphasize enjoyment, developing
skills, and team play
Friendly with other parents
Knows the rules of the game
13. THE ROLE OF THE RECREATION
PROFESSIONAL
BE PROACTIVE!!!
It is YOUR
responsibility to
ensure that the
activity meets the
philosophy of your
program.
16. Parent Orientation
• Expectations for proper behavior
• Acquaint parents with the coaches
and administrators
• Educate parents about the
objectives, goals, and rules of the
program
• Get parents to understand and
reinforce the coaching philosophy
that will be used
• Establish clear lines of
communication
• Help coaches and administrators
understand the concerns of parents
19. ACCOUNTABILITY
•
•
•
•
Agreement must be explicitly worded
and clearly identify the penalties for
potential violations
Tell parents up front what the
consequence will be if they do not
uphold the behavior agreement
(Suspensions, removal)
Evaluate behavior violations as part of
a formal hearing process
Include mechanism for violators to
demonstrate evidence of behavior
improvement (written
statement, meeting with administrator)
Follow through with what you say
you’re going to do!
20. TRAINED AND COMPETENT
COACHES AND OFFICIALS
Trained
to utilize techniques that tone down
confrontations among
players, coaches, officials and spectators
21. THROUGHOUT THE SEASON
Open communication
Opportunity for parents to provide feedback
Recognition – Be sure to recognize positive parent
behavior. Say thank you!
On-going education – keep parents up to date with
relevant information
23. TOOLS TO ASSIST FROM NAYS
Parents Association for Youth Sports
Rate Your Coach
Let’s Talk Sports
National Youth Sports Coaches Association
National Youth Sports Officials Association
National Youth Sports Administrators Association
24. PAYS PROGRAM
•
40 minute orientation
Educational video
and code of ethics
•
•
Nationally recognized
•Developed
by
professionals
•
•
PAYS online option
Member Area
29. How to get involved?
•Easy for recreation
departments to offer PAYS to
parents
• Parents can sign up as
individual members
30. RATE YOUR COACH
Provide an avenue for parents to give feedback
about coaches
Online system
31. “Rate Your Coach” Evaluations
View All Results:
Historical results can be
exported to a
spreadsheet for
management.
View Individual
Results:
Results can be used to
follow-up with coach
complaints or to
reward coaches for
great service.
View Categories:
You and coaches will be
able to see the areas
where they need to
improve their coaching.
32.
33. LET’S TALK SPORTS!
Program is focused on helping parents and their
children understand and encourage the
development of life skills through sports
Free, easy to sign up online
Parents complete the program along with their child
and receive a certificate of completion.
Helps parents understand the real value of playing
organized sports is not winning!
letstalksports.nays.org
35. OTHER TRAINING & MEMBERSHIP
PROGRAMS
National Youth Sports Coaches Association
How to deal with parents
Coaching your own child
National Youth Sports Officials Association
How to deal with parents
National Youth Sports Administrators
Association
Managing parents
36. WRAP UP
Review
Questions?
If you would like a copy of today’s presentation or a
temporary login to the PAYS Member Area. Please
email me at:
Kate Dilworth - kdilworth@nays.org
37. SCENARIO #1
You
receive several e-mails from an
angry parent who is upset because her
child has not played every inning of
the first five baseball games (the team
lost three of the five games). Her child
is considered by most to be one of the
top five players in the league. The
parent is blaming the coaches for the
losses.
38. SCENARIO #2
One
of your parents begins to
regularly yell a chant that is foul
(rhymes with “ducks”) and
disrespectful to the officials. The
players and some of the parents
appear to be joining in on the chant.
Introduce presenter and go over a brief topic outline for the session.(running) Coaching youth sports sometimes involves dealing with petty behavior, jealousy, high emotions and constant whining.And then there are the kids.
Basic history of NAYS and our programs. Later we’ll talk about getting involved.
Parents are the backbone of youth sports, it’s the parents who make it all operate. Deciding to register, driving to practice, cheering at games, volunteering to coach, etc. They play a huge role in the entire experience. Ever been to a youth sporting event where parents yell and scream at, or belittle, the players on the field--sometimes their own. How about these same individuals badgering referees and/or coaches during the game, maybe after the game? Discussion: Ask audience to share memorable stories about a youth sports parent? Positive or negative.- Bottom line here is there that youth sports parents have a wide range of attitudes and behaviors.
- 1 minute clip of two bad/ugly youth sports parents. From ABC NEWS special.The majority of parents have good intentions and display positive behavior, but I guess video clips of good parents aren’t entertaining enough for prime time TV!For some parents who are unable to act appropriately at their child's sporting event, the reasons have more to do with personality factors and underlying social pressures. (“If you let me down” social pressure – rage is a personality issue)
The extreme example showed abusive behavior from the father and over-involved/upset behavior from the mother. Other common negative behaviors. Betting!
Pushy/over involved parent“Then/Now” suggests that this is a trend but there are articles from 1975 in Sports Illustrated describing violent behavior at youth sports events. I have heard youth sports parents called “a virus” because it the problems keep evolving in new ways.
How did does this happen? So many instances of poor behavior at youth sports events. Let’s take a look.- Group discussion question “First, let’s talk about why parents sign their children up for sports in the first place?” In other words, what are the benefits of sports participation?- FOR THE MOST PART: parents enroll their children in sport because they believe that sport participation has tangible benefits – and they are right!For the child: It’s enjoyable, builds character, increases self-esteem, lowers school drop out rates, etc.For society: Persons who were involved in youth sports are more likely (as adults) to volunteer, donate money, vote, attend to news and current affairs – thus, they are more active members of society!- It IS a fun, safe and healthy activity
Shift Happens (paradox shift)- Parents voluntarily sign their children up for a fun activity and then either their child is better than they thought, or the other kids are a lot better than theirs. Parents start to identify with child. Their child is a direct reflection of them. Lose sight of all those benefits of sports and get caught up in the competition. the parents' self worth is linked to the child's athletic success. Thinking of their own feelings now. Really makes you wonder… Is the program for the parents or for the children??? Parents can also become emotionally involved, and in some cases, lose proper perspective when they begin to see their young athlete as an investment. Some parents view athletics as a means of achieving fame, glory or material rewards. In many instances, the goal can be a college scholarship or professional contract. But even if a child appears to be a gifted athlete, the odds are remote.
Negative Role ModelsToo often, professional sporting events have become venues for aggressive, bottle-throwing fans, who vent their frustration at officials and players.TV Shows: "in your face" confrontations or physical altercations between guests (e.g., The Jerry Springer Show). Drugs/Alcohol
Describe your dream parent.
OK so we are starting to understand the root of the issue. What can be done? How do we get everyone on the same page? Start with a pre-season meeting for all parents. Educate them about their role in the youth sports experience Require all parents to sign a behavior agreement or code of conduct Have a system in place for when a parent violates the agreement and ENFORCE the policies and procedures.
Show of hands: has anyone participated in (or offers) a pre-season meeting? What was it like? What type of content was presented? WHO: Require all parents and guardians to participate. Not for kids. WHAT: Their role and impact in youth sports. Important dates and information about your program. Behavior expectations. WHEN: Before the season begins. Another note about “when”.. This content is especially important for parents of first time athletes WHERE: Location with ample seating and limited distractions. Local community center, school amphitheatre or classroom, etc. WHY: WHY!?!?!?Have you been paying attention to the presentation AT ALL!?! Do you listen to ANYTHING we say!?!?! Just kidding!
Require all parents to sign a behavior agreement or code of conduct, code of ethics, behavior agreement At the end of the parent orientation Even if for some reason you don’t have a parent orientation, require parents to understand and sign a behavior agreement!
Require all parents to sign a behavior agreement or code of conduct, code of ethics, behavior agreement At the end of the parent orientation Even if for some reason you don’t have a parent orientation, require parents to understand and sign a behavior agreement!
Parents who volunteer to coach their own child’s team can find themselves in difficult situations. Equip these coaches with the skills they need to ensure the season is fun for all kids on the team. Treat all players equally. Take off the coach's hat at home. Parents can decide to create a new league on their own. These can be the overly competitive parents. When dealing with these coaches and administrators keep in mind they are parents first.
Can be a tough subject to discuss, leave it to us. Parents Association for Youth Sports PAYS is a 30 minute orientation in which parents view our educational video, and read and sign the PAYS Code of Ethics.
Show 4 minute clip of PAYS video 12:46 -17:20(talks about 10 pointers for parents)
Topics covered in 20 minute PAYS video
Think your community could benefit from the PAYS program?As a league or organization – start a chapter of NAYS to offer PAYS and other NAYS education programs to the adults involved your programs, no cost to begin!As a parent – tell your league about PAYS. Join online and spread the word.As a coach – tell your league about PAYS.Cost $5 per household either at a live meeting or onlineCOMMUNITY EDUCATION PACKAGE For only $75.00, organizations can order the PAYS video and handbooks/parent cards for 50 parents. This option allows organizations to use PAYS educational materials, however, parent information is NOT submitted to NAYS or maintained in NAYS’ national database and parents will not receive SportingKid magazine. Additional kits are available for $50.00 (excludes DVD).