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X-Ray Listening
Judy Rees
Judy Rees
• Passionate about connecting minds and
bodies via metaphor, to catalyse change
• Co-author of Clean Language: Revealing
Metaphors and Opening Minds
• International coach and trainer
Asking About Metaphor
• When you are listening at your best, you are
like... what? (Starter question only)
• What kind of X (is that X)?
• Is there anything else about X?
What did you notice?
Listening Benefits
• Brings you clarity about what people mean
• Reduces misunderstandings and conflict
• Helps listenees to think precisely
• Builds rapport and trust
• Conceals your ignorance!
AreYou Listening?
1.Listen
2.Be distracted
3.Listen
Notice what happens!
What Makes A Good
Listener?
Your suggestions
Deeper Listening?
1.Person A talks about something
important to them
2.Person B listens without speaking (can
smile and nod)
Notice what happens!
What Happened?
• When you were being listened to?
• When you were the listener?
• To the relationship between you?
Parrot Phrasing
Parrot Phrasing
1.Person A talks about something
important to them
2.Person B encourages them by
repeating selected words and phrases
3.Person C listens for metaphors and
makes some notes for later
A waitress increased her tips by 70%
simply by repeating the customer’s order
back to them in their own words, rather
than saying “okay” or “coming right up”
University of Nijmegen, 2005
Metaphor
Metaphor
Thought is made of metaphor -
the native language of the
unconscious mind
Metaphor
Describes one kind of thing in
terms of another kind of thing
Surfaces And
Essences
Douglas Hofstadter and
Emmanuel Sander
Metaphors In Mind
• Categorising
• Creating
• Interpreting
• Deciding
• Learning
Coins Activity
• Take a handful of coins
• Arrange them to represent either:
• you and your family, or
• you and your colleagues
Metaphor In Language
• Six metaphors per minute
• Side-effect of metaphoric thought
• Can be used to connect with the
unconscious mind
Metaphor in Thought
• Change in metaphor in language can lead to
change in thought
• Change in metaphor in thought “rearranges
neurology” - everything changes
The Mind
David Grove’s
Clean Language
Clean Language
Precision toolkit for
working with
metaphor in thought
Noticing Metaphors
Natural Metaphors
• Cliches and proverbs
• Common metaphors - eg. journey, game,
space, force
• “It’s like...” is stated or implied
Directing attention
with questions
Clean Language Questions
• Precision tools for working with people’s
thoughts and directing attention
• Designed to minimise content input
• Include as few presuppositions and
metaphors as possible
• Use only the given question, with one or
more of the person’s own words
• “And when...” with a parrot-phrase is used
as a connector
Clean Language Questions
David Grove
1950 - 2008
Clean Language
• Created by David Grove for therapy
• Modelled/codified by Penny Tompkins and
James Lawley
• Now ideas applied in multiple contexts -
management, coaching, marketing etc
• Increasingly supported by academic
research
“Constraint inspires
creativity”
What happens when you
are asked a question?
The art of directing
attention
The
2 Lazy Jedi
Questions
2 Lazy Jedi Qs: Uses
• Finding out more about anything!
2 Lazy Jedi Questions
• What kind of X (is that X)?
• Is there anything else about X?
Words Are Personal
• Think of a flower
• What kind of flower is your flower?
Using The 2 LJQs
• What’s one of the goals you have in life?
(Starter only)
• What kind of X (is that X)?
• Is there anything else about X?
What did you notice?
The Dark Side Of
Metaphor
Discovering A Metaphor
• Listen for, and notice, natural metaphors
• Or ask:“And that’s... like... what?”
• Ask very slowly, with long pauses
• Metaphors are personal
• Ask Clean Language questions - the details
are always different
Handling The Dark Side
• Notice - is this a metaphor for a problem
or an outcome?
• If it’s a problem, take care! Either:
• Use Power Switch immediately or
• Ask up to two LJQs before asking for a
metaphor, then use the Power Switch
Exploring A Metaphor
• Start with “What would you like to have
happen?”
• Explore that outcome with Clean Language
questions
• Listen for, and explore, metaphors
• If drifting into problem, use Power Switch
The Power Switch
• And when <problem>, what would you like
to have happen?
The Power Switch Uses
• Changing focus from negative to positive
• Changing mood/state
• Unsticking
• Persuasion, influence, sales
• Conflict resolution
Power Switch Practice
• Start by stating a minor problem
• “And when <problem>, what would you
like to have happen?”
Power Switch Practice
• This time, start with a metaphor for a minor
problem
• And <problem> is like... what?>
Practice
• Person A talks about something/someone
they love (or a metaphor for that)
• What kind of X?
• Is there anything else about X?
• “And when <problem>, what would you
like to have happen?”
Feeling to Metaphor
• Person A mentions a feeling
• What kind of X?
• Is there anything else about X?
• Where/whereabouts is X?
• And that’s like... what?
Unlocking The
Emotional Brain
Bruce Ecker, Robin Ticic, Laurel Hulley
Coaching With Clean
• Get a “towards” outcome
• Get a metaphor for that outcome
• Develop the metaphor until chimes
• No fixing! Elicitation is the intervention
Coaching With Clean
• What would you like to have happen (as a
result of this module)?
• What kind of X?
• Is there anything else about X?
• Where/whereabouts is X?
• And that’s like... what?
Necessary Conditions
• What needs to happen for X?
• Conditions are often “nested”
When you are working
at your best, you are
like what?
Starts 3 October
http://bit.ly/181xxxw
http://bit.ly/181xxxw
Judy Rees
www.xraylistening.com - blog
www.learncleanlanguage.com - resources
www.judyrees.co.uk - coaching
http://youtu.be/D7rFhf7
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http://youtu.be/D7rFhf7
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http://youtu.be/2cU56S
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http://youtu.be/2cU56S
WXHFw
http://youtu.be/aVvcU5
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http://youtu.be/aVvcU5
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X-Ray Listening: Clean Language section for NLP Master Practitioner Course

Hinweis der Redaktion

  1. Thought is made of metaphor just as matter is made of atoms
  2. Share with you the specific coaching techniques which can be used to release the power within those metaphors. Called Clean Language.
  3. start telling stories. Roland’s 34.8 m euro project. conflict - Ireland, South Africa, Gaza UK health service and BBC: 5-minute coach model
  4. Thought is made of metaphor just as matter is made of atoms
  5. Share with you the specific coaching techniques which can be used to release the power within those metaphors. Called Clean Language.
  6. And nuclear bombs
  7. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  8. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  9. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  10. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  11. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked
  12. do in big group so everyone has the experience of being asked