Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: VULNERABILITY
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This document outlines the agenda and key topics for a class on vulnerability and meta-emotions. The class includes discussions of shame and empathy, telling personal stories in small groups, examining myths and questions about vulnerability, and exploring meta-emotions and how to manage uncomfortable feelings about emotions. It emphasizes that practicing vulnerability can build important skills for leaders but can also be destructive if not managed effectively. For next class, students are asked to read about unhappiness from different perspectives and be prepared to briefly share a personal source of unhappiness.
![The art of
Photo by Philip Leara [link]
self-coaching
Ed Batista
Class 7:
VULNERABILITY](https://image.slidesharecdn.com/ed-batista-self-coaching-vulnerability-slideshare-161112154345/85/Ed-Batista-The-Art-of-Self-Coaching-StanfordBiz-Class-7-VULNERABILITY-1-320.jpg)
![Class #
Photo by losmininos [link]](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
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Ed Batista, The Art of Self-Coaching @StanfordBiz, Class 7: VULNERABILITY
- 1. The art of Photo by Philip Leara [link] self-coaching Ed Batista Class 7: VULNERABILITY
- 2. Class # Photo by losmininos [link]
- 3. Vulnerability Photo by Philip Leara [link]
- 5. This week…
- 6. Photo by Theresa Thompson [link] Small groups 35 mins Vulnerability 15 mins Meta-emotions 30 mins For next time… 5 mins Agenda
- 7. Before we get down to business Photo by Charles Hutchins [link]
- 8. Debrief in your What was that like? How did it feel? quartet
- 9. Shame & empathy Photo by Brandon Grasley [link]
- 10. Shame & Shame = I’m flawed & unworthy Empathy = The antidote to shame empathy
- 11. Shame & Shame = Creates distance Empathy = Creates closeness empathy
- 12. Shame & Seeking help typically triggers shame (or embarrassment or vulnerability) True for many forms of disclosure empathy
- 13. Shame & But typical responses block empathy 1. “Look on the bright side” 2. “My problem’s worse” 3. “Here’s some advice” empathy
- 14. Shame & Instead… 1. Avoid judgments 2. Sense & validate emotions 3. Convey understanding (≠ agreement) empathy
- 15. Vulnerability Photo by Philip Leara [link]
- 17. Vulnerability Now it’s your turn Spread out with your quartet
- 18. Vulnerability 4 minutes for each of you to tell a story 2 minutes for group to respond Timing will be key
- 19. Vulnerability How might you push yourself? What would be too far? Reflect for a minute
- 20. Vulnerability Photo by Philip Leara [link]
- 21. quartet Debrief in your What happened? What did you experience?
- 22. Thank your group Photo by Minda Haas Kuhlmann [link]
- 23. Debrief Photo by Philip Leara [link]
- 24. Crucible stories Photo by Dave Hogg [link]
- 25. Crucible stories Photo by Dave Hogg [link] Meaning-making Mental models Connections Empathy
- 26. Vulnerability Image by Public Domain Review [link] myths
- 27. Vulnerability Brené Brown Vulnerability = oversharing or weakness I don’t do vulnerability I can go it alone myths
- 28. Vulnerability So… If vulnerability ≠ oversharing, what’s enough? If vulnerability ≠ weakness, what is it? How do we build boundaries & trust? questions
- 29. Meta-emotion Photo by Franco Folini [link]
- 30. Meta-emotion John Gottman & Horst Mitmansgruber et al How do we feel about how we feel?
- 31. Meta-emotion Feelings (& thoughts) about our emotions Yet another set of mental models
- 32. Meta-emotion Discomfort with emotion Feelings themselves become triggers
- 33. Meta-emotion Possible with any emotions Particularly salient with vulnerability Powerful (often destructive) responses Suppression/denial, distance, acting out
- 34. Meta-emotion Reflect on your worksheets
- 35. What does this tell me?
- 36. What does this Reivich & Shatté ABCs: Adversity Beliefs Consequences Traps: Tunnel vision, overgeneralize, conclusions Icebergs: Achievement, acceptance, control tell me?
- 37. What can I do about it?
- 38. What can I Reframing Self-soothing Talking about feelings Leave our comfort zones They tend to expand do about it?
- 39. Vulnerability Photo by Philip Leara [link]
- 40. Vulnerability Why discuss this here, now? Why does it matter? A powerful lever when we can manage it A destructive force when we can’t
- 41. Vulnerability As leaders, you’ll manage it or you won’t You’ll build a culture no matter what
- 42. Vulnerability OBVS: The real world ≠ a classroom The underlying principles still apply It’ll be up to you to translate them effectively
- 43. For next time… Photo by funca88 [link]
- 44. Unhappiness Photo by Jes [link]
- 45. Unhappiness Subjective points of view Stoicism, Pema Chödrön, Viktor Frankl Which ones are most meaningful to you?
- 46. Unhappiness Chödrön is a little out there That’s why Burkeman Ch. 3 is an option (Burkeman Ch 2. is required, not optional)
- 47. & a (short) story…
- 48. & a (short) story… After doing the reading, complete the worksheet Multiple sources of unhappiness Be prepared to disclose one You’ll have 20 seconds
- 49. & a (short) story… This exercise can be daunting Please plan accordingly Please don’t be late
- 50. Other items… Slides posted on my site Next assignment due Tuesday 9pm