My take on the First Couple, on essence.com

1. The Obamas’ Relationship Stimulus Plan - Essence.com 10/6/09 12:54 PM
October 6, 2009
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POSTED: JULY 20, 2009
The Obamas’ Relationship Stimulus Plan:
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I find President and Mrs. Obama to be so much more relatable than any
previous White House occupants. And it's not just their brown skin. Two kids.
Two careers. PB&J in the pantry and playthings in the yard. They seem a lot
TALES OF A like my husband and me. And as they approach 17 years of marriage, they
HOLLYWOOD MOM always appear so loving toward each other. When I see reports of them having
with Tichina Arnold date night at the theater or in an intimate bistro, I'm frequently reminded that
it's the little things, done consistently, that make love last. Barack and Michelle
POSTED: 07.16.09 @ 04:02 demonstrate that brand of authentic commitment we see often in our
PM communities but so rarely in the media. As I look forward to celebrating seven
NOW IS THE BEST TIME years with my sweetie next month, I thought I'd share (and remember to take
TO GIVE to heart) seven keys to Love, Obama Style.Style.
I'm sitting here in my bed, thinking 1. Insist on couple time. For parents, that means not letting the time and
and evaluating myself, my actions, my energy you spend nourishing your kids result in you starving your marriage.
reactions and my behavior. The First Couple's weekend in Paris this spring is a great example of getting
the balance just right. While sightseeing on the river Seine and at Notre Dame
READ MORE » was a family affair, mom and dad enjoyed an intimate dinner alone at a cozy
restaurant later.
2. Keep your promises, no matter what. "I am taking my wife to New York
City because I promised her during the campaign that I would take her to a
Broadway show after it was all finished," the President told reporters at the
airport on the way to another much-publicized night on the town. By the time
he was able to make good on the promise, pulling it off was no longer as
simple as ordering a couple of tickets. Two helicopters, a small Air Force jet,
barricades to keep the paparazzi at bay and security screenings at both the
restaurant and the theater were required to make the evening a success.
Given all the fuss, he could have easily begged off. But he decided to stay true
to his boo.
3. Praise each other in public, share constructive feedback in private.
Playful quips about dirty socks aside, Mrs. Obama has frequently shared that
she fell in love with her husband's authenticity, truth and principles. The
President speaks adoringly of his better half, calling her "the love of my life" in
his victory speech, "good looking" at the Inaugural and even "a better dancer"
on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show."
TEAM
4. Touch each other, often. She holds his hand. He places one on the small
MICHELLE
of her back while walking. These little wordless ways of saying "you matter to
me" can create a bond stronger than that Mighty Mendit Super Glue sold on
http://www.essence.com/relationships/men/articles/the_obamas_relationship_stimulus_plan Page 1 of 3

2. The Obamas’ Relationship Stimulus Plan - Essence.com 10/6/09 12:54 PM
infomercials.
Laura Bush: I'm 5. Share and support your spouse's dreams without losing sight of
Free As A Bird! your own. You say you want to be the first Black man in the White House? poll
How many wives would have said "Um, good luck with that!" Our partners face
the world with a "Yes we can" attitude when we show them our unflinching
belief in their goals and abilities. But don't look to Mrs. Obama to support the
status quo as a cookie-cutter consort. She's redefining the role of First Lady in
The Heroes Of a way that stays true to her own ideals and passions.
Facial Hair
6. Read and respect one another's signals. When things are tense, you
may not feel like talking. Picking up on nonverbal cues is key. During the
campaign, a Ladies Home Journal reporter asked Michelle "How can you tell
More Style News when your husband is really stressed?" "When he is writing small notes late at
night. When he's really brooding," Mrs. O. said. "That's when I know [to ask],
‘What happened? What's going on?'"
7) Laugh—and pray! —together often. The Obamas share giggles and
Laugh— pray!—
gaffaws on a regular basis. They also share God. I'm glad to know that after
MORE ON ESSENCE.COM months of church shopping in their new city, they've found, in a chapel at
Camp David, a new place to call their spiritual home. The death of Kandi Burruss’s ex-fiancé A.J.
Jewell represents another example of the
BUY ESSENCE MUSIC Claire McIntosh is a deputy editor for ESSENCE magazine. senseless violence that is plaguing our
FESTIVAL community. What’s the solution?
MERCHANDISE It starts at home; we must be better parents to
Be the FIRST to rock
our children
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Music Festival®
We need greater police presence in our
merchandise.
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Black Love is expensive and loving
Posted at 7/30/2009 11:21 AM by Daniel Morgan
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Black Love is expensive and loving
Posted at 7/30/2009 11:21 AM by Daniel Morgan
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