Mind Your Manners On Linked In

OPEN SECURITY ALLIANCE
What I Dislike About People on Linked In – Mind Your Manners!
• I get these ‘connect’ requests
• Since my profile is public, I don’t mind the
requests because I am online to network too!
• What gets to me is the request message and
the way people send out these invites
indiscriminately – sort of spam, that’s how I
term it
• People just do not have any amount of
sensitivity on how to say hello! Are they
dumb…. And I got enough charge to start
writing!

• A human being can handle no more than 150
‘friends’ so what are people doing with thousands
of connections and looking for more!!
• At any time how many business associates can you
network with? More than ten! Goddam it you are
superXYZ.
• If you are at a conference and get a business card
from every attendee what do you do with them?
Hahaha – think hard and recollect the trash.
• At every event you rush to shake hands and hand
over your business card to the guest of honor – do
you believe your card will not be in the garbage the
next day? Liar !

TRUST? !!
does this thing exist!
How about me
trusting you??
• OK so you want to
connect with me, but
why should I …
• How about a better
reason than this one line
spam!
• How do you know me?
“I’d like to connect you to
my professional network”
“Since you are a person I
trust I wanted to invite you
to join my network on
Linked In”
“Please add me to your
Linked In network”

• How do you
expect me to
respect your
invite if you do
not have the
time to tell me
about yourself
• Do you expect
me to go check
your profile?
• Come on – be a
bit polite – show
you care and
put in some
effort

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• You shared some information about who
you are, where you’re from, what you do!
• Your motive(s) ?
• If you want something from me.. ?
• Don’t just drop out of nowhere with a
(canned) one liner written by someone else !
• Did you sent me the invite because you
liked my gender (m/f) or my picture or what !

• I may not be interested to increase the
number of connections on my profile
• Having x,000 connections may get
someone brownie points with Linked In but
how will one person (humanely) manage
the expectations of thousands of
connections is anyone’s guess!
• IAC – this is not an FAQ – it is about me!

How do we take this relationship forward.
BTW I sent a message asking why you are
reaching out to me … did you reply !

• You are connected to me but you do not respond
to my mail when I ask for an introduction
• Linked In is about professional networking and if
you do not respond to a business proposal – why
did you connect to me in the first place
• You may be having new opportunities but you do
not communicate with your ‘connections’ – so why
did you connect with them?
• Many a times you don’t even know if you are
connected to me !

• With your connection request write a few lines
• Why did you want to connect
• How did you come across my profile or name
• How will ‘being connected’ benefit us
• What are you bringing to the relationship
• If nothing like above, and you just want to
connect…. Then
• Just say that you want to be a friend
• Tell me why you want to be a friend and how
you found me

Some of my experiences with connections
which make me wary about intentions or
objectives. It will be so nice if people just
communicated.

• I accepted a connection and suggested we
meet – and, this guy wants to know why !
• Hey WTF, you sent the invite to connect
• I accepted your request and am asking to meet
you… - taking your interest to the next level!
• Why did you want to connect if you did not
want to meet up to discuss opportunities of
areas of common interest.
• Creep full of attitude – I disconnected.

• This guy sends a connection request and I
see his profile is nowhere near my business
or lines of interest so I write and ask him
what brings him to my doorstep.
• He says he is a recruiter so I write back and say
‘that’s great’ and how can I help him? Is he
looking at me as a potential candidate?
• Now there is no reply from this guy – so
much for being polite when you come
knocking my door.

• I am traveling to this new city and decide to
lookup some of my ‘connections’
• I write to them in advance … 50% do not get
back, 30% are busy and 20% ask me to ‘drop
them a line’
• Now these are all people in senior positions …
the supposedly ‘big’ guys.
• Had I written to freshers or juniors the story
would have been different (that’s what I would
like to believe)

• I got connected with this real enthusiastic
person who helps me a few times and I
help him a few times and we are now real
pals – and he moves to my city!
• I call him to say I am in the neighborhood
and but he is too busy to take a five minute
break.
• Or even drop me a message on LI

• This is another painful one… the connection
is from a company and not a person
• No picture of anyone!
• And this company has only one or two
connections
• And the message says that I am a person to
be trusted!
• Oh God – help me please

• The same 10 / 20 odd people are the only ones
who are posting or responding to discussions in the
groups. Millions of lurkers and freeloaders 
• I believe that a lot of recruitment happens on Linked
In and I have seen hundreds of interesting ads too –
no one has ever approached me  No friend of
mine has been recruited through LI or FB or TW
• I have heard the same about business too … but
have to see evidence. Yes I have made a number of
acquaintances and have instances of mutual benefit.

• Oh yes then there are those who connect with me and are working in
a competitor company (“them”)
• Either “they” do not monitor their employees or “they” do not care !
• Anyway my the new connected friend sends me a request saying that
I am ‘someone he/she trusts’ or ‘wants to grow his/her’ network
• After I have accepted the connection there is nothing … no noise, no
thanks, no communication
• Until… this person leaves his / her job or is kicked out, when I get a hi
how are you doing mail
• Asking for references for a job or career advice
• Everyone is not in the same boat because some do take time to reach
out in emails or at conferences (Check the email about the gracious
ones)

ABOUT
ME
Contact Info,
License, Copyright,
Disclaimer

CONTACT
INFORMATION
E dinesh@opensecurityalliance.org
@bizsprite
L: http://in.linkedin.com/in/dineshbareja
+91.9769890505
dineshobareja
dineshobareja

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Mind Your Manners On Linked In

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