Handbook for the Unemployables

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Job Shark
Quick Start Guide
For the Unemployed
By Nora E Boyle
Published by Nora E Boyle
Smashwords Edition
Copyright May 2010 by Nora E Boyle
To request information, please contact
perishpublishing@earthlink.net
· Benefits (UI)
· The Resume
· Become Self Employed
· Go Online
· Get Connected
· The Interview
· Training
· Sell yourself
· Temp Work
· Get the offer!
###
Chapter One
Benefits
File for Unemployment
If you were laid off, ‘let go,’ fired, or ‘canned’ then you can file for unemployment
insurance provided you file taxes, worked on a W2 and paid into the Fund.
The Fund is the payroll tax.
A W-2 is the federal tax form you fill out at the start of your job which states how much
you as the employee were paid during that year.
We might as well get the boring stuff out of the way.
US Citizen
If you are a foreign national with an H1 visa, green card, etc., you may qualify, but call
your local employment compensation bureau to find out what you have to do.
Undocumented workers will need to get documented if they want to collect.
Where to Go

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For filing an unemployment claim, there is either a website or a 1-800 number.
Unemployment is a state-run agency and is called “UI” or unemployment insurance, but
names of the state agencies range from “Employment Development Department,”
Department of Labor and Workforce Development,” Unemployment Insurance Agency,
or Texas Workforce. When you are let go from your job, they are obligated to furnish you
with this information.
Unemployment Insurance or UI
UI provides weekly insurance payments for workers who lose their job through no fault
of their own. Well, it’s important to take responsibility for everything that happens to
you, so cool off before you talk to the UI people about what an asshole your boss is. This
insurance is funded by employers who pay taxes on wages paid to employees.
The agency determines your weekly ‘wage’ through a benefits calculator and benefits are
awarded for 26 weeks or about five months. They do not pay you immediately, referring
to this as the ‘waiting week,’ and during the recent recession, there was an additional 73
weeks of benefits provided under the Emergency Unemployment Compensation program
or EUC.
The federal government stepped in to provide additional funding to the state-run agencies
as unemployment rose to an average of ten percent nationwide. This additional
compensation is called Federal Extensions, and there was even an additional $25
included in the check. Extended Benefits or EB is part of the EUC but has different
requirements for the ‘claimant,’ depending on how much you earned and when you
earned it. Generally, the people down at Unemployment look at your last 18 months of
employment.
How Much?
$500 a week or less, probably less
Employers are required to submit annual federal unemployment tax under FUTA, the
Federal Unemployment Tax Act. The tax rate is 6.2 percent but if paid on time, can
receive a credit of 5.4 percent. The net FUTA tax is then reduced to 0.8 percent. These
FUTA taxes fund the unemployment benefits in each state for both military and civilians.
The unemployment rate is the percentage of the labor force out of work, and is measured
by leading economic indicators. It is calculated by the number in the total labor force
divided into the number of unemployed.
Good Times, Bad Times.
Recession, depression, recovery and prosperity are the business cycles in an ‘economy,’
and a little economics lesson never hurt anyone. We all know economics is the study of
the production, consumption, and distribution of goods and services, and shows us the
law of supply and demand. The law of supply states the number of products increases as
prices increase and decreases as

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prices decrease. Demand is when people will buy more of a product at a lower price than
at a higher price. So, if there are more houses than there are buyers, the price will fall,
and if there are more buyers than there are houses, the price will rise. The buyers are the
demand side and the houses are the supply side.
Business Cycles
The cycles of the economy reflect the law of supply and demand and affect the value of
real estate, jobs, manufacturing, the stock market, and interest rates which affect credit
cards and loans. Key factors in economic downturns are interest rates, housing
construction, layoffs, deficit spending, and mounting national debt. The four stages of
increasing and decreasing economic demand are these business cycles: recovery,
prosperity, recession, and depression.
RECOVERY
This is when consumers begin purchasing goods and services after a slowdown. Prices
fall and as demand exceeds supply, production increases. Employment rises, and more
money becomes available. Consumers spend more money. Commercial and industrial
real estate reduce their vacancy rate and the economy is headed for an upturn once again.
PROSPERITY
There is low unemployment, higher consumer income, more buying power, higher
demand for goods and services, followed by price increases. Inflation may increase,
decreasing the purchasing power of the dollar. Credit is available to expand the
production of goods to meet the increasing demand.
RECESSION
There is increased production to catch up with increasing demand to surpass it. Supply
exceeds demand and industry must cut back on production. As supply increases, there is
an excess of goods. Layoffs occur and unemployment rises. Consumer confidence in the
economy decreases, and there is less money to spend. Prices may fall as business tries to
attract customers, and credit is more difficult to obtain. Production activity slows, and
only necessities are purchased. The recession bottoms out when a surplus supply of goods
are exhausted and buyers come back to the marketplace.
The National Bureau of Economic Research defines a recession as a significant decline in
economic activity spread across the economy, lasting more than a few months, normally
visible in real GDP real income, employment, industrial production, and wholesale-retail
DEPRESSION
There is high unemployment, less confidence in the economy, and limited ability to
purchase. It would follow a recession as a matter of degree if consumers had absolutely
no way to re-enter the marketplace and purchase the goods and services they needed. In a
downturn, the general business economy, fewer people can afford to buy real estate,
demand decreases, and prices decline.

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Since the Great Depression from 1929 to 1934, safeguards to prevent large-scale fallout
like the 1929 stock market crash brought about establishment of the Federal Deposit
Insurance Corporation (FDIC) which insures depositors in banks and savings and loan
associations against loss up to $100,000.
Most people are now aware that many banks failed in the crash of 2008-2009.
Unemployment hit a record 20 percent where one in five people were out of work. Many
still are unemployed as their jobs ‘went away’ and are not coming back.
The Job Market
No use crying over spilled milk – just retrain, and reboot and get back in the job saddle. It
is easy to see what’s in demand. Computer skills are always in demand as the economy
becomes increasingly digital. Healthcare will always require doctors, nurses, lab
technicians, medical technologists, and pharmacists. And, then there are government
jobs.
###
Chapter Two
The Resume
Resumes R Us
A resume is your career profile, not just a list of jobs, but everybody has an opinion on
how they should be written. Your best bet is to have two or three versions; one
functional, one chronological, and one that is geared toward stop gap employment or
temp jobs.
A functional resume does not advertise the fact that you took a year off to write a novel,
but instead that you have great writing skills, and a functional resume offers your
responsibilities and achievements broken down into focused areas like “managed this”
and “managed that,” “budgeted this and budgeted that” etc., etc. If you have a ‘spotty’
job history, then you need to capitalize on your strengths, not your flakiness. Personally,
job hoppers are really job shoppers and are merely activating the flight or fight instinct.
Check out resume-resource.com or quintcareers.com
The Application
It doesn’t stop there. If you have ever filled out an online application, not only do you
have to duplicate the information in the resume, but you must also accurately revise some
things that you skim over in the resume. There are ‘assessments’ and questionnaires, and
‘additional information’ or comments, or you have upload more stuff like curriculum
vitae, writing samples, and whatever information they can suck out of you, they will
provide a text box for you to do so. And, this is before you even get an interview.
And, they have ways of making you talk.

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This is part of the ‘weeding out’ process. Sometimes they make you fill out an
application, including job references prior to the interview, so have your names and
addresses handy.
If you are in the process of filling out job application after job application or if you would
like to work for the government, then you need to get used to the process and make your
words sing. After one arduous application, job hunter Jeff Wilson, filled out everything -
when at the end - it asked him another series of intrusive questions like
· more about you
· getting personal
· tell me more
· some basic questions
Pretty soon, Jeff’s hair went on fire and he wanted to quit before he finished. But, he
realized he would be weeding himself out.
Criminals Need Not Apply
Here’s an example of application verbiage.
All Applicants: dishonest or misleading answer to the questions could prevent further
consideration of your employment or, if employed, be cause for your immediate
dismissal. A conviction does not automatically preclude employment, but the nature of
the offense will be noted. Applicants for certain positions can not be hired if their
criminal record makes them ineligible for a state license. Similarly, federal law prohibits
insurance companies from hiring persons who have been convicted of certain criminal
offenses.
"Criminal Offense" includes misdemeanor, felony, or military offense. You may exclude
misdemeanor traffic citations and juvenile offenses. "Convicted" includes, but is not
limited to, having been found guilty by verdict of a judge or jury, having entered a plea of
guilty or nolo contendre, or having been given probation, a suspended sentence or fine.
State Applicants only
Do not disclose any information concerning: (a) any conviction for which the record has
been judicially ordered expunged, judicially sealed, or statutorily eradicated; (b) any
misdemeanor convictions related to marijuana which occurred more than 2 years ago; (c)
any misdemeanor convictions for which probation has been successfully completed or
otherwise discharged and the case has been judicially dismissed pursuant to Penal Code
Section 1203.4; and (d) any record regarding a referral to, and participation in, any
pretrial or post trial diversion program. *Application Question Set - Responses Required
Have you ever been convicted, pleaded guilty or no contest, or accepted adjudication to a
criminal offense other than a minor traffic violation?

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If yes, please explain in the Application Comments box below.
Are you currently charged with a felony involving dishonesty or breach of trust or any
criminal offense other than a minor traffic violation?
If yes, please explain in the Application Comments box below.
Are you 18 years or older?
Do you have a high school diploma or equivalent?
Do you have authorization to work in the United States?
Will you now or in the future require sponsorship for employment visa status?
(e.g., H1B, TN1)
Do you currently or have you ever served in the U.S. Military?
Have you applied to this company before? If yes, please provide the date or approximate
date that you applied in the Application Comments box below.
Equal Employment Opportunity
And then of course, followed by all the EEO* stuff and electronic signature so they can
follow up with a credit check. Jeff’s hair was still on fire and he was so exhausted, but he
finished.
Then all he got was - Thanks, but we have decided to pursue another candidate. “Please
try us again, however.” The idea is they hold on to your information, usually for about a
year, so you don’t have to fill it all out again, but that’s as long as you remember your
password, and username, and the security question, and the website.
*Some people think Equal Employment Opportunity is reverse discrimination, as it gives
preferences to veterans and minorities, but given all the discrimination in the workplace,
it hopefully serves as a counterbalance.
Are you now or have you ever been?
A veteran in the Armed Forces?
Disabled or Blind
Hispanic or Latino
One or more race
Two or more races
White
A Disabled Veteran
US Citizen
And, some applications drill down even further:
Viet Nam Veteran
Other protected veteran
Special Disabled Veteran

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Recently Separated Veteran
And, it is easy to tell if the company gives veterans preference if you get this:
Vietnam Veteran - (a) A person who served more than 180 days of active military, navy,
or air service, any part of which was during the period of August 5, 1964 through May 7,
1975, and who (1) was discharged or released with other than a dishonorable discharge,
or (2) was discharged or released from active duty because of a service-connected
disability if any part of his or her active duty was between August 5, 1964 and May 7,
1975. (b) A person who served more than 180 days of active military, navy, or air
service, who served within the Republic of Vietnam, any part of which was during the
period of February 28, 1961 through May 7, 1975, and who (1) was discharged or
released with other than a dishonorable discharge, or (2) was discharged or released from
active duty because of a service- connected disability if any part of his or her active duty
was between February 28, 1961 and May 7, 1975.
Other Protected Veteran - A veteran who served on active duty during a war or in a
campaign or expedition for which a campaign badge has been authorized.
Special Disabled Veteran - A veteran who is entitled to compensation (or who but for the
receipt of military retired pay would be entitled to compensation) under laws
administered by the Veterans Administration for a disability (1) rated at 30 percent or
more, or (2) rated at 10 to 20 percent in the case of a veteran who has been determined
under section 3106 of Title 38, U.S.C., to have a serious employment handicap or (B) a
person who was discharged or released from active duty because of a service-connected
disability.
Recently Separated Veteran - A veteran who served on active duty in the US military,
ground, naval, or air service during a one-year period beginning on the date of a veterans’
discharge or release from active duty. If recently separated vet, please provide discharge
date:
Be All You Can Be – it pays to serve in the military.
Google Thyself
Now, here’s the kicker: you get through all these obstacles, and you sit down in front of a
middle-aged woman with a computer, and she says,
“I Googled You."
What does she find? Well, so there aren’t any surprises here, always remember to Google
thyself first and on a regular basis. Okay, maybe you are one of eighteen Jane Doe’s in
the world, but are you on Facebook, Myspace, Linkedin, and the forty other social
networks? Are there photos? Are there photos of you naked? Are there any photos of you
drunk?

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A lot of people are astonished because they know nothing about ‘privacy settings’ on
these social network sites, and even if you have a password, your public profile might
allow anybody to see your photos from Spring Break down in Florida. Are you sort of
naked and sitting on some strangers’ lap? If you think this harmless fun won’t get you in
hot water, remember the snowboarder in Vancouver in 2010 that had to leave the
Olympics early in shame after photos were posted of some girls posing suggestively with
his medal. No closing ceremonies for him. Do not allow people to pre judge you.
So Back To Your Resume
Have it critiqued. Listen to constructive criticism. Recently, a wedding planner asked a
seasoned writer to help her with her ‘bio’ that would be included on a website, not
actually a resume, but yes, sort of a resume. Said wedding planner threw around words
like risk management and said she had a multitude of dimensions and the meaning, of
course, is lost.
Risk management is a business tool, not something a wedding planner really uses, unless
of course, she sees that her client’s marriage is a huge mistake. And, ‘a multitude of
dimensions sounds like a personality disorder, but the wedding planner thought it was
‘cool.’ Heh, go ahead, see who thinks you are cool when they think you have multiple
personality disorder, and/ or a Harvard MBA in Risk Management.
Credibility is key. You must write in concrete language, and do not even think about
writing in Textese (OMG, I mean TXZ) when corresponding with prospective clients or
employers about getting work. Write in complete sentences, and by writing in concrete
language, you avoid misunderstanding.
For example:
U R So getting multitudinal wit Ur attitude about Ur dimensions when U mge risk
Art and Arson
Artist resume -You are on your own. We all have our talents, but if you really want to be
a painter, then you may need to find a sponsor. Consider a teaching career or get a job as
a graphic artist to pay for the canvas and oil.
Actors require headshots, full figure shots, and probably a website.
WEBSITES
You will be Googled. If you have a website, where you can put your resume, credentials,
samples of work, PORTFOLIO, and even some clients, then this will impress as long as
it is done well. If you know nothing about creating a website, then get one of those off-
the-shelf websites from these providers:
Intuit.com
Yahoo! Small Biz
Hostmonster.com

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Bluehost.com
And, you can get a free blog page from Blogger.com. If you want to be an expert at
something, here’s one way to prove it. Write about what you know. If you are in real
estate, then you might want to blog about the real estate market, but you will have to find
an angle, since there is plenty of competition.
You will need a Domain name or the Name of your Website such as “Noraboyle.net”
and pay for a two-year registration through Register.com.
If you are a website designer and developer, a graphic artist or photographer, a writer, or
anything where you need to make a name for yourself, a website can display your
advertising and post your portfolio. Please don’t post a picture of yourself taken at age 20
when you are age 40.
Expertise and Profiles
It is important to set yourself apart from others in your field and develop expertise. Some
people like to be seen as ‘techies’ or ‘geeks’ while others want to be business savvy or a
sales shark. Whatever your arena in life, you need to develop your expertise, credentials,
and as they say in academia, publish or perish. You must prove who you are or at least
show evidence.
One way to achieve this is your mission statement. A mission statement is a profile of
your career thus far, but also lists your accomplishments, achievements, awards, and
philosophy – say of management. This should not sound canned, but you should edit
ruthlessly, have it critiqued, and read it aloud to see if it sounds phony.
Here’s an example from Terry, a tech writer:
I realized as a technical writer, I work with some of the smartest people in the world. As a
writer, I realized this is a craft that needs to be polished every day and so write
religiously, studying new technologies, learning new software, and reading as much as
possible. During college, I began working for daily and weekly newspapers as a reporter
and feature writer, and also worked in advertising and marketing, where I learned
graphics and photography. I learned a good work ethic from the pressures of a daily
deadline and also learned a good deal about interpersonal skills and ways to get the job
done. The pressure of the ‘daily news’ is fiercely competitive and low-paying, but proved
invaluable as ground work.
As the Information Age ensued with the advent of personal computing, it became evident
that not only would I have to practice my craft as a writer, but become truly digital and
learn technical communications beyond my journalism studies. I studied desktop
publishing, page layout, graphics, and advertising design, and learned specific computer
programs such as Adobe PageMaker, In Design, Photoshop, and Illustrator. I studied web
development, learning HTML, and its many incarnations such as XML, especially as
more and more people requested I design web pages. As documentation became more
sophisticated, I learned more robust programs like Framemaker, Robohelp, and content

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management systems where I learned structured documentation and conditional text, now
so prevalent in web applications.
I transitioned into technical writing as the demand for information technology services
grew. I had the opportunity to work for a large telecom company where I received
training in documenting the software development cycle, systems integration and
application, and network engineering.
My work style is simple. I like to contribute, and work with people who are objective,
technical, scientific, and smart; I like to work with people who focus on their work and
the team they play for. Work should be fun and enjoyable, but this often depends on
unity, and this achieved when people have a common goal and respect their leadership.
The Japanese have a saying, “Many in body, one in mind, “and this is how a unified team
moves mountains.
Again, for resume templates and samples, just Google. If you are not a writer, there are
plenty of resume writing services available.
###
Chapter Three
Become Self Employed
So, you have had a couple of jobs, a boss from hell, and there was not much team spirit in
your last job. You can do better, you can take of business, and work at being self
employed. Everybody knows a dysfunctional company when they are in it. Maybe you
worked for a family-run company, but oh, you were not a member of the family. Or, the
boss decided to hire his wife to do the books. Many companies and departments within
companies go off the rails, and you are supposed to put up and shut up, but a lot of times,
you either have to cut your losses and run for your life.
Or, you just get canned. Don’t take it so hard. When one door closes, another one opens.
Just make sure it’s not the door to Hell.
Get a Tax ID or TIN from the Federal Government: IRS.gov. This way, you can
‘freelance,’ work for yourself, file quarterly taxes, set up a consulting business, and or
form your very own empire. (*TIN stands for Tax identification number)
It expands your employment options, and who knows? You might tap into your inner
‘mogul,’ and discover how to build a better Mickey Mouse.
Necessity is the mother of invention and to further avoid trite adages like this, here’s the
point: You expand your employment options by forming your own business, and here’s
why:

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Most of us wage slaves work on a W2.
W2 is the form you fill out when you are hired for a job and shows how much the
employee earned during the course of a year. Payroll taxes come out of this paycheck
every week along with social security and a host of other FICA taxes that pay for social
costs. But, if you are your own corporation, sole proprietorship, or work on a ‘1099’ then
none of these taxes are taken out and you get to keep those earnings, but then must pay
up to the IRS in a larger share. Many consultants and contractors form their own
corporations. The catch is if you get canned, you do not qualify for unemployment.
Employment Contract
When you work on a 1099, you usually sign an employment contract with an agency and
the contract language will state something to the effect of:
Each party agrees and acknowledges that consultant as an independent contractor will
pay at its expense all fees licenses, insurance costs, and other costs and expenses of
performing the services.
Consultant is and shall be solely responsible at its expense for payment of all workers’
accident, injury and illness compensation and all other legal and labor requirements.
Consultant is and shall be solely responsible at its expense for all contributions, taxes and
premiums, including nut not limited to FICA, income taxes, withholding taxes, payroll
axes, and unemployment and workers compensation premiums, payable under any and all
laws measured on or in relation to the sums paid under this agreement by AGENT to
consultant.
Doleta.gov.
Another good resource for the self employed is this website of the US Dept. of Labor
which offers self employment assistance. This program is designed to encourage and
enable unemployed workers to create their own jobs or start their own business. Instead
of unemployment benefits, the self employed worker can obtain an allowance while they
become established. Again, this is operated by the State, so check for this on doleta.gov
with this link
http://www/servicelocator.org/owslinks.asp
To be eligible, the worker needs to be previously laid off or dislocated and can obtain
training, business counseling, and technical assistance.
First Things First
Get a TIN
A Tax Identification Number or TIN is an identifying number used for tax purposes in
the United States. It may be assigned by the Social Security Administration or by the IRS
(Internal Revenue Service.)

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A TIN may be:
Social Security number (SSN) Individual Taxpayer Identification Number (ITIN)
Employer Identification Number (EIN), also known as a FEIN (Federal Employer
Identification Number).
SSNs are used by individuals who have the right to work in the US.
ITINs are used by aliens who may or may not have the right to work in the US, such as
aliens on temporary visas, etc. The Tax ID number is actually called a “Federal EIN”
(Federal Employer Identification Number). Often the reason why people need the
identification number is because they have been advised by a bank that no account will
be opened without it, even if it is requested by a non-profit organization.
EINs are used by employers, sole proprietors, corporations, partnerships, non-profit
associations, trusts, estates of decedents, government agencies, certain individuals, and
other business entities.
An Individual Taxpayer Identification Number (or ITIN) is a United States tax processing
number issued by the Internal Revenue Service. It is a nine-digit number that begins with
the number 9 and has a 7 or 8 in the fourth digit, i.e. 9xx-7x-xxxx or 9xx-8x-xxxx.
The IRS issues ITINs to individuals who are required to have a taxpayer identification
number but who do not have, and are not eligible to obtain, a Social Security Number.
ITINs are issued regardless of immigration status because both resident and nonresident
aliens may have Federal tax return and payment responsibilities under the Internal
Revenue Code. Individuals must have a filing requirement and file a valid federal income
tax return to receive an ITIN, unless they meet an exception. In the U.S., we tax
everything that moves.
The program was created for the purpose of tax filing of passive income, not salary or
hourly income, and used for these income sources is an unintended misuse. Receiving an
ITIN number does not in any way confer the right to work and receive income in the
United States.
In 2006, 1.4 million people used ITIN when filing taxes. Federal tax law prohibits the
IRS from sharing data with other government agencies including the Department of
Homeland Security, ensuring illegal immigrants that the tax information will be
confidential and not be used to deport them.
ITINs are also used by real estate brokers to facilitate mortgages for legal and illegal
immigrants.
Form 1099 is an IRS form to prepare and file an information return to report various
types of income other than wages, salaries, and tips for which Social Security
Administration Form W-2 is used instead. Each payer must complete a 1099 for each

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covered transaction. Three copies are made: one for the payer, one for the payee, and one
for the IRS. Instructions for form 1099 include a guide to what payments must be
reported.
Examples of report amounts paid to independent contractors or in IRS terms payments
that are nonemployee compensation. U.S. tax law requires businesses to submit a Form
1099 for every contractor paid at least $600 for services during a year, but does not apply
to corporations receiving payments. Each payee-taxpayer is legally responsible for
reporting the correct amount of total income on his or her own Federal income tax return
regardless of whether a Form 1099 was filed.
Once you’ve squared away the tax thing, then you can go into business for yourself and
hopefully make money. If you are a consultant, you still need to get somebody to hire
you, but often this is done through recruiters or agencies. This is unless you can get your
own clients. Sometimes, if you have worked for a company, you can outsource yourself
as a consultant, and send them a bill just like any other vendor. And, hope they pay you.
You need to send them an invoice, and if they don’t pay, you need to become your own
collection agency. So, be careful with whom you do business. One piece of advice, only
do business with people or companies you both like and trust.
If you have a service to sell, say computer or accounting skills, then this is easy to set up
in a business. If you have goods to sell, say your very special cookies or clothing, then
there are often production costs, shipping, delivery, and insurance on any equipment you
may use, not to mention a facility or warehouse to store it all. People do it all the time,
however, and one college graduate, Jeremy, teamed up with his friend, Joshua, to form a
personal training alliance where they train college athletes and teams and then opened
their own gym called AET Fitness in the Valley in Los Angeles.
During the recession, their clientele grew so rapidly that they expanded into a bigger
facility and at age 25, these two young men have a thriving business. Why? Apparently,
during a recession, either people have more time on their hands to work out, or people
were working much harder and ditched their regular gym memberships for a dedicated
personal trainer to work on their time. Jeremy’s philosophy is his gym is no frills and is
for ‘average joes.’ And check out Average Joe’s at
aetfitness.com
And One thing about starting a business, you may have to bend over backwards to get
and keep new clients.
Don’t Get Rich Quick
The key to self employment, however, is to avoid the Get Rich Quick schemes, and the
millions of job scams on the internet. They appear in your email and seem legitimate like
‘we need a work at home agent to take orders for us, only we need your bank account
through which we pay you $3000 a month, and then you send us $500.

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Well, what happens is their check or bank transfer bounces, and you are stuck with the
tab. Anything that requires you to use your personal bank account is probably a scam
and do not do it.
Self employment is hard, but no harder than trying to get a job, so at least you have this
option if you have a skillset that is in demand in the workplace. Contracting is how many
people earn a living and they often earn pretty good money doing it. Depending on where
you live and what you do, your income could double. And, if you like to travel, often
consultants can get hired in other states and in other countries.
While working at Lucent Technologies, Sheila met a German woman who‘s expertise
was SAP, an enterprise computing program that was being implemented at the company.
Sheila said the woman earned $200 an hour and traveled all over the world on these
company contracts often getting housing and car allowances as well - all because she
knew a computer program.
One more thing about being self employed…its risky and not for everybody. You assume
the costs and responsibility of keeping your business afloat, so grow a thick skin, because
you will take hits.
###
Chapter Four
Go Online
If you have a computer, connect to the internet. If you don’t, you will have to get
connected. Do not be Digitally Illiterate or you are missing out on a large part of the
economy, jobs, communication tools, and well, high speed access to all things Planet
Earth. Your local library offers free computer access, and if you can’t type or completely
lack any computer skills, there is free training available in most communities, local
community colleges, Adult Ed, and through the Unemployment Agency also known as
Workforce Development.
Okay, say you are a Neanderthal and hate computers. Fine, be that way, but the world is
passing you by. It’s akin to the cave man that discovered fire and used it to cook his food,
and the guy who said Nay and preferred to eat raw meat and later died of trichinoses. Its
survival of the fittest, and in this century, it’s the computer fittest.
Linkup!
Bookmark these
Google.com
Facebook
Linkedin

15. 5/26/2010
Careerbuilder
Monster.com
Yahoo.com
Craig’s List
Okay, Facebook is optional. If you just connect professionally to people on FB, great, but
pretty soon, that loser in third grade will find you. Do you know you can read books on
Google library? Just look for Google and then books. You don’t even have to go to the
library or buy the book, you just dig it up on Google, add it to MYlibrary, and voila, you
are reading The Art of War by Sun Tzu. Most of these books are in the public domain or
if still under copyright, allow a ‘limited preview.’
For job-hunting purposes, you need to get online and connect to all the major jobsites,
and set up job alerts or email agents, and get job notices directly in your email.
If there’s a company you have your eye on, then go directly to their website and sign up
for notifications if they offer this. As soon as the job of your dreams becomes available,
you are the first to know. Another way into a company is through Linkedin, and if you
can, you develop contacts within the company, usually through their recruiter.
Sometimes, companies and their recruiters ONLY advertise through social networks like
LinkedIn.
Also, there are dozens of groups that have popped up on these sites for everything
imaginable, from “I Need A Job” to “Fortune 500 Job Opportunities” and for those of
you in the 20 percent that graduated college, there are online Alumni Associations all
willing to network, advertise, and promote their wares, jobs, and services. And, of course,
all the recruiting agencies have created websites and joined in the social network
phenomena to promote their services. Everybody is a fame whore these days.
With over 60 million members, LinkedIn has become a business networking
phenomenon, and now, people are even consulting on how to use social networks to
advance your cause. Within every posting, profile, and correspondence, people include
the links to their blogs, RSS feeds, websites, company, mobile messaging, Twitter and
other accounts, just in case you want to hitch your wagon to their star or vice versa.
Facebook, on the other hand, is more family friendly, and while companies and people do
use it for business networking, there’s a lot of fan pages on there, celebrities, and people
looking for their high school sweetheart from twenty years ago. Facebook is great for
communicating to family members and you can send private messages on here as well.
So, what if that loser from third grade finds you and pretends you were her closest ally?
You can always DeFace them, which is to ‘unfriend’ them or disconnect them if they
start stalking you or annoying you.
One of the side effects of all this fame whoring, and pardon this expression, but there’s
no other term for it, is that people really abuse the electronic and instantaneous

16. 5/26/2010
connections we have, by endlessly sending message after message to others and thus, are
spamming. Now, there are spam laws in place, but you also need a fairly robust internet
provider who can help deter this.
Facebook boasts over 400 million users worldwide, so be careful about what information
you display publicly on your site. Don’t give out too much personal information like
addresses, and when and where you will be, or where you live, since some moron might
actually show up and take advantage of this.
Going online is really the most effective way to find a job, and many people are
‘working’ online as they telecommute or work at home for companies on their computers.
This option is increasingly attractive to stay at home moms, disabled people, and
eliminates that insufferable commute.
There are even websites dedicated to finding these jobs, including Craig’s List which
offers a telecommute check box in the search function, and jobsites such as Remote jobs,
Flexjobs, tjobs, Linkup, telecommute-jobs, and yet, many are customer service, sales, or
writing jobs.
Here’s an excerpt from the blog: http://boombabychrono.blogspot.com
Ah! Perchance To Dream, To Telecommute!
According to The Bureau of Labor Statistics' Occupational Outlook Handbook, 2008-09
Edition for jobs that may experience high job growth AND allow you to work from home
are
Sales and Advertising Agents
Sales and Advertising agents locate advertisers for every medium including internet,
print, newspaper, radio, billboards, and even the sides of your car. The new hot ad
medium is online marketing and BLS projects 35,000 new positions will be created by
2016.
Administrative Assistants
Administrative Assistants used to be called secretaries and yes, they still exist. "Admin
Assists" are able to work remotely if their workplace is plugged in with a secure interface
and allows for them to work in different cities if their company and boss allow. It does
cut down on much needed office space.
Computer Software Engineers
BLS ranks this occupation as one of the fastest growing with 1.18 million software
engineers currently employed and an additional 324,000 new positions expected by 2016.
Software engineers design, develop, and testing new computer software and perform
upgrades and fixes as required. This usually requires a computer science degree.
Court Reporters

17. 5/26/2010
Gone is the bespectacled lady typing 100 words a minute on that weird device, though
they may still exist. Now they are transcriptionists using sophisticated audio and
computer equipment and this usually requires an investment.
Customer Service Representatives
Many companies seek customer service reps when they can't afford a huge call center in
India. The number of customer service representatives is expected to grow from 2.2
million to 2.7 million by 2016.
Event Planners
Event planners coordinate any event and are responsible for everything from soup to nuts
including choosing a venue, finding a guest speaker, tracking attendees, making
transportation and lodging arrangements, and managing any crisis that arises in
connection with the event, meeting, or personnel they are hired to 'handle.' Usually
involves a lot of phone work and budgeting.
Market Research Analysts
Market research analysts are in growing demand as online advertising continues its global
rise. For every new gadget invented, from I Phone, to digital TV, somebody has to figure
how to make money off the changing habits of television, cell phone, computer users and
viewers, and how much they can charge them. Web metrics are big here, as is finding
niche markets for new products.
Paralegals
Paralegals or Legal Assistants help lawyers assemble documentation for trials, meetings
and other events where research and analysis skills are required. Law firms usually
require an ABA (American Bar Association) certified program for their paralegals, so
don't just go to Bob's online college and get paralegal training. Also, they usually have to
be very specialized to work at home and do the overflow work of attorneys for tax
preparation, labor laws including workman's compensation cases, and corporate law.
Personal Financial Advisers or Consultants
Rich people need help investing their money, either planning their retirement or sending
Junior to college, so they hire a financial planner who will advise them on the best way to
do that. Often these people are also certified (CFP) and must be knowledgeable about tax
law and accounting methods. Projections for this job see a jump by 41 percent by 2016.
Technical Writers
Any technical document, instruction manual, project proposal, or anything smacks of
technical data is usually written by 'tech writers,' who are often well versed in computer
software and or specialize in electronics or engineering. Tech writers translate
complicated technical jargon to make it comprehensible to a wider audience. Since this
work is project-oriented, it can be done remotely if the company allows.
And, telecommuting works well for part- time workers, seniors, and students. Of course,
once your home becomes your office, you might find going to work in your pajamas not

18. 5/26/2010
so attractive. You never get away from your job, you are married to your computer, your
phone, and you might not make as much money. Most people miss the social interaction
of the office, and of course, Happy Hour.
###
Chapter Five
Get Connected
While we touched upon social networking in the previous chapter, once online, once you
have email, once you join every professional or social network that applies, then you
need social or rather, E-Skills.
Start a blog.
http://scryptography.blogspot.com/
http://boombabychrono.blogspot.com/
http://teksaurus.blogspot.com/
http://noraboylenet.blogspot.com/
And, read blogs:
http://recareered.blogspot.com/
Phil Rosenberg writes a great one,
Who's Firing summarizes weekly research of companies announcing and rumoring
layoffs for the week….For the past week pharmaceutical, airlines, government, financial
services, and health care employers announced the largest layoffs.
http://recareered.blogspot.com/2010/05/whos-firing-layoffs-week-ended-5-21-10.html
Phil offers personal coaching for people navigating through a job search and offers “Free
Career Teleseminars” so, join in, and contact Phil –by emailing him at
phil.reCareered@gmail.com .
Someone once said, “I like the internet, but I don’t want to live there,”
And yet, there is a large population that does. When you join social and professional
networking sites like Linkedin, Facebook, Yahoo Groups. MySpace, etc. you hook up
with perfect strangers who may or may not give you one good idea or one good job tip,
so trawling the internet for any information to get employed - works.
Learn to do research on Google and job sites.

19. 5/26/2010
Start with these jobsites:
Careerbuilder
Monster
Yahoo Hotjobs,
Post your resume, then dig deeper
Plaster resume all over the internet wall. You never know where an opportunity will
come from. Well, as long as you have email and a phone, a cell phone, an Iphone, a
Droid, a Blackberry, a PDA.
You can get free public email at gmail from Google or at Yahoo.com. Texting is another
skill you may want to learn, but that’s a whole ‘nother universe and most people are all
thumbs. There’s also a specialized Texting language, and there’s a link for the translation
down below.
Let me interject another blog entry here:
ROTFL
TXT-ZING
After my nieces introduced me the fine art of texting, I realized I had an age related
disorder brought on by my love of words and grammar, and OMG, are they kidding me
with this abomination of the English Language????
But, still first, seek to understand...(and then see my essay on Evil Teenagers) So for
every TXT Zing I manage to get out, they send me VOLUMES within seconds and I just
give up, but they never answer their phones anymore!
So, here are few translations of this new TXT Lingo
ROTFL Rolling on the floor laughing...
GTG - Gotta Go or G2G
TTYL or T2UL Talk to you later
MU Miss U
POS Parents Over Shoulder
2NITE Tonight
ADR Address
ASL Age/Sex/Location
B4 Before
B4YKI Before You Know It
BC Because
BRB Be Right Back
CIAO Goodbye (in Italian)
CWYL Chat With You Later
CYA See You
So, if you can type on a microscopic cell phone (I still have trouble with laptops) Have at
it!
AT&T's Parent's Text Tutorial (You will just have to Google it as it is an Acrobat doc or

20. 5/26/2010
PDF) offers the following tips to text messaging. Since each message can only contain up
to 160 characters, users have developed a short-hand system to allow them to say more in
one message. One outcome of this practice is that punctuation is widely disregarded.
Below, are more basic tips:
Take out vowels. For example, shorten 'Text' to 'TXT'
Replace words with symbols and numbers — For example, instead of writing the word
'FOR,' use the word '4.' So when the letters 'FOR' appear as part of another word like
'FORGIVE,' it's usually texted as '4GIVE.' More examples include: People = PPL Please
= PLZ
Use Known Abbreviations and Common Words –There are some words that do not use
the regular methods above but have become popular abbreviations or acronyms over
time. Many of these have spread to text messages from their initial use in chat rooms over
the Internet.
Other examples include:
And = &
AT = @
ATE = 8
ONE = 1
TO/TOO = 2
Percent = %
Remove the End ‘E’ and Change ‘O’ to ‘U’
OMG, is OH MY GOD, but there is salvation, had I taken the time to read the 99 page
manual that came with my cell phone and service - you can post text messages online
using your conventional keyboard - limited to 160 characters, but Heh! I am such a spaz
in the cell phone typing pool....
And, finally this from the Urban Dictionary:
Sexting: the act of text messaging someone in the hopes of having a sexual encounter
with them later; initially casual, transitioning into highly suggestive and even sexually
explicit In a sentence: "He keeps sexting me saying how hard he is and how much he
wants to tap my ass," Cindy said massaging her breasts unconsciously.
Sexting in action:
Nancy: "Wut do u want?"
Bob: "Cum over to my place now."
Nancy: "Is NE1 else there?"
Bob: "No. I need to c u."
Nancy: "K. Will b there soon."
So, if you need texting lessons, ask a 15 year old.
As for sexting, please don’t.

21. 5/26/2010
And then there’s Twitter. No one is certain where Twitter fits into all of this but sign up
for an account anyway. Somebody will follow you and you may follow somebody and
round and round she goes. Who knows? Maybe you will twitter right into Demi and
Ashton.
There’s a networking site for every profession and then some.
Go local and regional, go international, and find people in other countries, but keep your
eyes on the prize. What is your prize? Employment or a Career? A job or and adventure?
A Soul Mate or a Cell mate? Pretty much anything you want is out there on the Internet
frontier. Facebook is a general site, whereas Linkedin tries to keep it to networking
professionals.
Meetup.com is a good one to check out for networking in your local area and anybody
can host a meet up, so beware of pagan rituals that call for members to be ‘skyclad’ since
that means Naked. If you are looking for business contacts, you can find people with
mutual interests here. When you are out of work, it’s good to get involved in other
activities, even if it’s a sewing circle. You never know where job opportunities lie.
Meettheboss.com is a business networking tool for business execs around the world
across all industries. If you are in management, check it out.
For a list of social networking sites
Visit wikipedia.org and search for social networking sites. But Wikipedia is chiefly a
global encyclopedia, so if someone says that you need to bone up on your Drupal skills,
you can look it up and find out what Drupal is.
About.com is another good site to find out about anything.
The best place to start any search, however, is with Google.
Alexa.com shows the top websites in the world, by country, and by category. For
example, if you go on Alexa.com and choose by category, by business, you can further
drill down to your specific industry or career interest, say information technology, and
then drill down from there to several more categories, especially, ‘employment.’
Jobsites
There are jobs and then there are job cemeteries. When you do your career assessment,
you will discover many things that will make you successful. What’s a career
assessment? See below, but first let’s look at job sites.
Careerbuilder, Monster, Yahoo Hotjobs are still viable, but they fall in and out of favor
with recruiters, and lately Craig’s List.org, as it is free, is really topping the lists.
Localization is key here, and recruiters are not offering relocation expenses to many
people anymore, so they prefer to find somebody within a fifty-mile radius.

22. 5/26/2010
Some of the better jobsites are
Computerjobs.com
Dice.com
Pharmajobs
Biospace.com
Gadball.com
Job.com
The Ladders.com
Simplyhired.com
Indeed.com
Jobcentral
Jobserve.com
Beyond.com
Efbfweb.org
Hotjobs.com
Execu-Search.com
Hound.com
Ooodle
Snagajob
Trovix
Tweetmyjobs….for twitter users!
USAjobs – for government jobs, mostly federal
EFbfweb.org – a little known, but highly effective site.
One way to search for jobs is to enter your zipcode into the search tab, or if that produces
too many results, then search on job function like administrative assistant, construction,
web developer, systems analyst, editor, Indian chief, candlestick maker, etc.
Job Title?
One good exercise is to figure how your job title. It is better to have one all-
encompassing job title, than not. Are you a consultant? Salesperson? If you are changing
careers, and all your experience is in insurance, then become an insurance consultant.
Often, if you are transitioning out of one career, you will need to retrain for another. This
is where stopgap jobs come in. A Stopgap job is any job you can get to cover the bills –
for NOW.
Of course, if you are an artist, you will need a Plan B.
However, there are many sites catering to writers, actors, and Hollywood wannabes.
Here are a few sites to check out:
Varietymediacareers.com
Mandy.com
Productionwizard.com

23. 5/26/2010
Backstage.com
Massify.com
Greenlightjobs
And they do hire a lot of people for game shows and reality shows, so if you keep your
eyes peeled, they may hold auditions in your town. Try not to embarrass yourself.
There are people in Los Angeles who make a living by auditioning and getting on game
shows. You do have to know how to play the game and have a good personality.
Check out this site for getting work as an extra.
seeingstars.com
Extras are the background actors in television and movies, and some people do this as a
stopgap job.
Call Central Casting in Burbank at 818-562-2755 and press number 2 to go to the non-
union Info Line. A recording will tell you how to get registered. For most work in Film
and TV, you need a SAG card (Screen Actors Guild). You also need a social security
card. One famous actress made $75 a day waiting for her big break – a regular job!
If you don’t do your own career assessment, others, and by this, others who are in
positions to hire you, will assess you. This is referred to as the ‘sniff’ or ‘smell’ test, and
this is the snap judgment the recruiter, the human resources woman, the hiring manager,
or the 22-year-old kid who’s interviewing you. They absorb your essence much like a
vampire sucks your blood. They take note of what you are wearing, what you look like,
and how you present yourself.
Some are sharks, some are idiots, but you must connect to them and take control. Some
will do all the talking, so you need to interject. These are the gatekeepers. Some of these
people take themselves way too seriously, but do not underestimate them.
Some people don’t say much and expect you to do all the talking. Establish a dialog and
try not to sound stupid. Stay quiet, but let them know about your interest in the job.
Devise a script and a few sound bytes, a few anecdotes, and try not to complain or whine
or sound ‘negative.’
If you sound bitter or spiteful about previous employment experiences, they will make
judgments about that, so the idea is keep your interview act upbeat, engaged, interested,
and competent. Try not to appear desperate, even if you are. The key is to achieve rapport
with the person, but this is not always possible, so sit back, and make a decision on how
best to present yourself, while being interrogated. It’s always smart to have a few stock
questions to fall back on when you can’t control the conversation.
What sort of person are you looking for?
Who will I be working with?

24. 5/26/2010
How many in your team?
Is there a training period?
What’s your timeline for hiring?
And, if you can sneak this in
So, how many people are you interviewing?
And, importantly
I would really like the opportunity to work here
And, are these your kids? (if you see a photo) Take notice!
Okay, this is a personal question, but its okay to get personal – for a minute – to achieve
rapport. They might have a picture on their desk, and if not, they might have some clue,
that shows something of their lives in which you should feign interest. Never
underestimate the power of flattery. Just, don’t schmooze.
If you are too oily, they will make a judgment about that. The objective is to ‘connect’
and achieve rapport and get a dialog going. This is so they like you or at least think they
like you and then pull for you to get the job. This is called selling yourself, and we
devoted an entire chapter to it.
For an online personality test:
humanetrics.com
Career Assessing
What do you really enjoy?
What do you want to be when you grow up?
What can you do?
How much money do you want to earn?
What do you absolutely hate doing?
For some, this is a process of elimination. Some people love being on the phone, others
hate it. Some people love meetings, others do not. This is where you really need to learn
what drives you nuts and discover where you thrive.
Some people love to drive, and some people just want to sit on their butts all day in an
office or at a computer. If you are restless, then you probably should get a job where you
are ‘on the go,’ or at least get out of the office to go on appointments. Read job ads and
see what jobs are in demand. Computer skills are a must.
You need to learn how to type.
If you speak a little Spanish, learn to speak a little more Spanish.

25. 5/26/2010
If you have a knack for cooking, then cook, and if you like to drive, drive, but if you
really hate being on your feet all day, retail stores and waitressing jobs are probably not
for you.
Connect and Electrocute
Making connections is all about people. If you are not a ‘people’ person, then you need to
work a little harder, or, perhaps, differently. You can discover these things about yourself
before you find yourself in the absolutely wrong job. There are personality tests for these,
but realize you can change, and you can compensate for anything they say you are not.
Job hunter Lilli Dexter told this story:– She temped for a personnel recruiter who liked to
administer his personality tests to people who worked for him, so she complied. He read
the results and came out of his office utterly astonished, saying ‘you are not a people
person…!”
Lilli laughed and of course, knew this was true, but she managed to conceal this from
most people, having compensated and learned social skills to move through society with
ease. She knew most people didn’t like you if you are too quiet or too talkative or if you
are too self-involved and always talked about yourself. It’s important, she said, to
interview people, ask the right questions, be interested in them, and then they like you.
Seems shallow, she said, but it works – like a charm. Funny, how most people never learn
this.
By connecting with others, we open the channel for opportunities. And, by opening the
channel, we become part of the human web, and this is where we open up to possibility,
to opportunity, and to adventure. If people remain locked up in themselves, inattentive,
self absorbed, they lose out on many new experiences. Relationships are life’s mirrors
and we are burnished by our encounters with other people, good or bad.
We all know the guy in the office with the colossal ego who thinks the world revolves
around him, and/or tries to make it so. There are people who like to control others with
anger, with flattery, with contempt, and many of them actually get jobs in management.
Some companies reward bad behavior.
But, these bullies miss out on stuff, too – a lot of stuff. There is always an office or
workplace bully. They like to intimidate, dominate, and push people around.
If you have had this experience, go to
Workplacebullying.org
It’s important to blend in with society, make friends, even if you are not a ‘people’
person, because this is how people become successful. If you find yourself depressed or
anti-social, or not fitting in, then try to get some therapy to heal those inner conflicts,
childhood wounds, or bitterness and baggage we all collect. And, then there are
medications which help those with bipolar disorders, depression, anxiety, and obsessive-
compulsive disorder or OCD. These things are all treatable.

26. 5/26/2010
And, there are free mental health clinics usually associated with local hospitals, so if you
find yourself doing drugs, drinking alcohol, and being angry and anxious all the time,
then why don’t you ask for some help – some confidential help? Jim Lewis, a young
college graduate had trouble getting his career going, and after the death of his parent,
started falling apart.
High Anxiety
Fortunately, someone recognized Jim’s anxiety and gave him the name of a therapist. Not
a psychiatrist, but a social worker with an MSW or Master of Social Work who counseled
people at a low cost. Jim realized he had some serious but treatable issues, and was
relieved to talk to a professional about them, and after six weeks, he felt so much better.
It is not like talking to your friends at the bar, but a professional who has skills and
techniques to help you discover the cause of some your anxiety, behavior patterns, and
black moods that lead to drug and alcohol abuse.
Some of this is programming we inherit from our parents and family, and some of it
comes from negative experiences.
Jim said later, “I thought I was schizo or psychotic…turns out I had adolescent anxiety
disorder – I was only suffering from arrested development and I had some bad brain
chemistry. I take anti depressants and stay away from drugs and alcohol, and I’m doing
really well…”
There is little room for mental illness in our society, so if you feel yourself falling over an
edge, get help.
###
Chapter Six
The Interview
So, you got an interview! It might just be an appointment with a job recruiter or a temp
agency, but wait, are you going to just ‘wing it?”
Don’t! They ask specific psychological questions in interviews and you must be
prepared. Any human resources person or talent recruiter worth their salt will ‘weed you
out,’ because there are so many reasons to do so. When the job market is competitive,
they get flooded with resumes.
Mary Harris, recalled being hired as a temp for a large recruiting agency where she was
handed a stack of resumes and was told to find the ones with ‘auditing’ experience. There
were hundreds of resumes. The job was for controller of a large company, and its fate
was in a temp’s hands. She picked out resumes she thought were ‘cute.’

27. 5/26/2010
By prepared, it is akin to a first date, and you must make a good impression. Don’t talk
too much. Have questions ready. Have answers for why you left your last job, how long
have you been out of work, what you are looking for?
Back on the Chain Gang
If you are out of work, tell them you are ‘working’ but at a stopgap job doing something
relevant. It’s harsh, but people seem to discriminate against people who are completely
unemployed, and it seems you need to cover your tracks. You can say you are temping,
freelancing, writing a book, taking classes, whatever. Just don’t say you are sitting on the
couch all day, watching “Days of Our Lives” and “Oprah.”
Even if you are.
One of the first ways they weed people out is pretty simple:
How much money do you want?
What is your salary requirement?
How much you want to earn?
Salary history?
Show Me the Money
Avoid this subject at all costs but, if they never bring it up, don’t hesitate to ask “What’s
the salary?” Especially if they are Just a Recruiter. Then you can weed them out.
They sometimes ask for this up front, but try to avoid it until you feel like maybe; the
salary won’t meet your expectations.
If they ask for a salary history, then use your discretion on what to tell them. They
usually have a number already in mind, so your job is to figure out what that is, so you
don’t overshoot the target.
When they ask you for your salary number, ask them back:
“I know you must have a figure in mind, why don’t you just say what it is, and I will tell
you if it’s too low?”
If they hesitate, then you have hit a nerve. They may counter with – well what is your
salary request? Backed into a corner, try to make an assessment before you spill six
figures.
Think of what the bottom number is for you to work there, and go five, ten thousand
over. If you have no clue about the salary range for the job, then you need to do some
homework and discover the market rate.
Working in the USA
Another showstopper is if you don’t have a social security number, because then you
need a visa or a work permit to work in the country you are in. There are permanent
resident aliens or people who are in this country legally, but if you don’t have a work visa

28. 5/26/2010
or a social security number, your job options are severely limited. And, then there are all
those questions about have you ever committed a felony?
Try not to get arrested – ever. While a life of crime is tempting, you can forget about
going back to the normal nine to five. And, besides, there is all that white collar crime to
witness. The big money is the casino they call the Stock Market, so if you itch for
financial adventure, get your stockbrokers license. Wall Street waits for you. And, there’s
a book called, “The Best Way to Rob a Bank is to Own One, by William K. Black. Make
money, but try not to embezzle, swindle, and steal. Also, if you get arrested, you can’t get
your license to practice law, and we all know that is an option worth keeping open.
Credit Scores = 620
The other big glitch in getting hired is your credit score, and if it is below 620, then you
can probably forget working in banks, high finance, retail – yes, even the huge superstore
on the highway, since you are essentially being punished for not paying your bills, or not
paying them on time. You will be turned down for jobs requiring security clearances
unless you are a rocket scientist and nobody can do what you do.
Preparation Meets Opportunity
Mentally prepare for each and every interview – do not ‘wing it,’ because you may just
get hit by a truck. You create your own LUCK.
Review all the positives that have occurred in your career and in your personal life. And,
after you finish beating yourself up, try to stay positive. You are worthy. It’s just a job.
Visualize In Advance.
Seeing yourself as a successful person with a job is part and parcel of getting a job.
Visualize questions and your response. Practice in front of the mirror. Write them down
and bring them with you.
If when you do your own career assessment, did you find a hidden talent? Everybody has
a dream inside, something they would love to do – if. But, first you have to fit into the
workplace, so remember the interview script:
What sort of person are you looking for?
Who will I be working with?
What’s your timeline for hiring?
So, where are you from?
Okay, this is a personal question, but its okay to get personal – for a minute – to achieve
rapport. If they say they are from somewhere else, then you know something more about
them. You can say you went there once, and loved it, or you would love to visit, Podunk,
Iowa some day.
Some really good advice from Paul Blair of Manpower about interviewing”

29. 5/26/2010
“Don’t appear too complacent, and don’t be too cocky…”
(pblair@manpower-sd.com)
It’s important to check your ego at the door and try to appear interested, enthusiastic, and
knowledgeable about the job, your skills, your background, and the company where you
hope to get a job.
Some Interview Questions
How do you respond to pressure?
I work well under pressure; I have always imposed deadlines on myself.
Are you optimistic or pessimistic?
I am often optimistic, but we all have our worries.
Do you have reliable transportation?
I do, and the commute is no problem or I can relocate…
What kind of work do you enjoy?
I enjoy this sort of work (whatever they are interviewing you for)
What are your greatest strengths?
I like to think that I have leadership qualities, I will do whatever it takes to finish the project and I think I have good
interpersonal skills and work well with others. I like being part of a team, but can also work independently.
What are your areas for improvement?
I would love to get more training (on a specific skill set required for this job or on the computer applications they use
for this job…there is always room for improvement.
The last time you used a specific skill?
Keep it current even if you haven’t touched this in five years. They want to know if you done this within the past 6
months and how long you have used this skill. Some skills are like riding a bike, others require constant practice.
Why do you like programming/analysis?
Why does she think I know programming?
What programming do you find interesting?
(OMG, she thinks I’m a programmer)
I am fascinated by coding and making things work correctly.
Do you like to work in groups, alone, or both?
I like to work in teams when necessary and independently when I have designed the project
(Careful, trick question! This is how they determine you are a team player…)
What significant accomplishment in your past has given you the most satisfaction?
(Write this down beforehand)
What major problem have you encountered and how did you deal with it?
(Also write this down beforehand, and do not slander anyone in the process)
How has your education or experience prepared you for a career?

30. 5/26/2010
(Write this down beforehand and keep it brief) I love to learn and when I was in college, I interned as a rocket
scientist…for NASA and they thought I had great potential um not as a rocket scientist, but as somebody most likely to
communicate with alien lifeforms.
How would your references describe you?
Upbeat, hard-working, personable, a good team player…( I pay them… )
What about your last supervisor did you like or dislike?
(That SOB SH&**head wouldn’t know his head from his A$$$!^^%$#%&) She was brilliant and taught me so much!
(Be careful, do not slander anyone.)
What are your work or study habits like?
(Low lighting, solitude, easily distracted, suffer from ADD, etc.) I’m very adaptable!
If you could have dinner with anyone in the world and discuss anything who would it be
and why?
(Oh brother!) Just don’t say Jesus or some deity. Stick to this century and somebody who is not dead.
And another thing. It is great if you are devoted to the Lord and are super religious, but
many people are not. There’s pretty much a policy of separation of church and state in the
US, so don’t bring it up in an interview. Nobody wants to be around somebody who’s
always proselytizing or preaching. Leave that to the professionals or the Mormons.
###
Chapter Seven
Training
While you are collecting unemployment, you are eligible for training and can get basic
computer skills, job training, and academic courses toward a high school or college
degree. Take full advantage of any or all training.
Say you want to be a real estate appraiser. They will sponsor the basic coursework to get
trained and certified for the licensing exam. Currently business schools charge $1200 for
the six week course, but it is usually online. You still have to pass the test, though, and,
then pay the state licensing fees. Ditto for real estate, home inspection, and many
insurance jobs.
If you don’t have a high school degree, the government will help you get your GED, and
if you don’t have a college degree, Associates or Bachelors, they will help you get those,
too. Less than 20 percent of Americans have their Bachelor’s degree and it’s a real edge
over the competition in terms of getting a job. If you don’t believe this, look at the want
ads and see how many jobs require the Bachelor’s degree.
Education, certification, training, and instruction
Training is easier to get than ever because a lot of it is online. When a woman said she
was getting her Master’s degree at the University of Phoenix, an online ‘college,’ you

31. 5/26/2010
could hear the deafening roar of disbelief, but it’s true. And, they offer a juris doctor as
well – yes, a law degree. So life is learning, and if you suffer from residual hatred of
schools, teachers, and/or ADD or any learning disability, now is the time to declare
yourself learning disabled and get help, or get retrained for a new career. We all have
talent, find yours.
Dina Costello was out of work and applied through Workforce Development to attend
training in computer graphics. The 12-week course for five different software
applications was costly, but completely paid for by state government funding. She
learned the rudiments of Adobe Photoshop, Adobe Indesign, Adobe Pagemaker, Adobe
Illustrator, and an animation tool, Adobe Flash. Not only did Dina get high-end computer
graphics training, she got a job, and now designs websites. Graphics is easier with
computers, but you still need to know how to draw.
Many online tutorials exist for the most basic instructions for any software program or
application and here’s a free one
W3 tutorials.com
This little known gem of a website teaches you the basics of
HTML
CSS
Javascript
VBscript
XML
SQL
And many other web development and web programming computer skills.
Computer instruction can be pricey, and if you are offered any, take it. Computer
consultants working on contract can earn anywhere from $20 to $200 an hour depending
on skill set, and what flavor of the month software package is in vogue. While many
people pursue advanced degrees in computer science, many are also self-taught. And, if
you invent software that mows the lawn, move over Bill Gates, because you can move
into his mansion.
Workforce Development
WD is a program under the Federal Department of Commerce and Economic
Opportunity, and is committed to encouraging statewide economic development by
cultivating a well-trained workforce via the Workforce Investment Act (WIA) to assess
employability skills and provide training.
If you are collecting unemployment, ask about Workforce Development in your area as it
is managed on the state and local level and they run out of money quickly.

32. 5/26/2010
If you would like to create your own opportunities, research grants and go to the US
Department of Labor’s Directory of Foundation Workforce Grant Opportunities.
This is a list of companies who will partner and place people in jobs. This list also
includes FBCO’s or faith based and community organizations.
Also check out the US Department of Labor Employment and Training Administration or
ETA.
Doleta.gov
This is a master site that tells you about unemployment insurance and job training, grants,
disability, and state and local contacts. This is where a Foreign Worker can also find
information for hiring and filling out forms.
Also on this site – ASSESS YOURSELF!
They have online tools for planning your career options, a skill profiler, and finding
occupations based on your skills. Get a snapshot of your employability and how much
you can expect to earn.
And, of course, there’s a local office somewhere. And a 1-800 number
In 140 different languages, no less
1-877-US2-JOBS
TTY
1-877-889-5627
There is also a page for employment laws in the event you were wrongfully terminated,
discriminated, and ill-fated in your previous job.
Other avenues of job training besides temp jobs, school, and internships, are the military,
government jobs, and of course, self learning.
Be All You Can Be
Now, if you want to join the military, you need to do this before age 35. And if you want
to be a fireman, a policeman, and work for the FBI, CIA, or any other action hero job,
they usually like to get you before age 35.
Why? No clue. It’s a state secret.
I’m Old, not Dead.
So, seniors, characteristically those over 50, are only discriminated against by young
people, and not all young people, just the snotty ones. As one very petty person put it:

33. 5/26/2010
“Nobody in management wants to hire somebody older than them so they feel like they
are talking back to a parent.”
Sounds like a personality problem, but there it is. So, age discrimination comes in many
forms. One prevalent way is
“We decided to hire somebody straight out of college…”
According to the latest statistics released by the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity
Commission, more than 45,000 charges of age discrimination were filed in 2008 and
2009, up from about 30,000 in 1999 and 2000. This number does not accurately portray
the many instances of people who are disregarded by employers during the interview
process because of their age.
Despite the fact that the number of age discrimination cases being filed has dramatically
risen over the past couple of years, it's becoming increasingly difficult for workers to
prove their claims.
A 2009 Supreme Court decision in the case of Jack Gross v. FBL Financial Services, Inc.
found that older workers bringing age discrimination claims must meet a higher standard
to prove their claims than others who have been subject to unfair discrimination at work.
Congress is currently considering legislation that would overturn that decision, restore the
burden of proof to the employer rather than the employee and ensure that age
discrimination is treated in the same way as race or sex discrimination.
The bill, called the "Protecting Older Workers Against Discrimination Act," is still
pending. In the meantime, AARP is sponsoring 48 career fairs in 19 states across the
country in the coming months to help jobseekers over the age of 50 re-enter the
workforce.
The "Helping Experience Work@50+" events will offer workshops on promoting
yourself over the age of 50 and will emphasize tips and techniques for success in a
competitive job market.
And, it doesn’t stop there. People are discriminated for all sorts of reasons including
being too fat, too old, too ugly, and male or female, gay or lesbian.
Too Fat
Morbid obesity is now classified as a disability, as in
“I can’t come to work today, I’m too fat…”
Well, get help. Once you top 300 pounds, then you probably need professional help. As
many laws are passed to combat workplace bias, it is always there, since nobody has
figured out a way to get rid of small-minded, petty or negative people. Overheard on the
phone once, a tech recruiter said to her client,

34. 5/26/2010
“Wait till you meet (Suzie) she’s got a great body!”
So, there are jobsites and opportunities for the Old, but so far none exist for the Fat.
Here they are:
Quintcareers.com
Workforce50.com
Job-hunt.org
Jobsover50.com
And of course, check out
AARP.org
Training for Older Workers
The Senior Community Service Employment Program (SCSEP) is a community service
and work based training program for older workers. Authorized by the Older Americans
Act, the program provides subsidized, service-based training for low-income persons 55
or older who are unemployed and have poor employment prospects. Participants have
access to both SCSEP services and other employment assistance through One-Stop
Career Centers. Their goal is to provide both community services and work-based
training.
Participants work an average of 20 hours a week, and are paid the highest of federal, state
or local minimum wage. They are placed in a wide variety of community service
activities at nonprofit and public facilities, including day-care centers, senior centers,
schools and hospitals. It is intended that community service training serves as a bridge to
unsubsidized employment opportunities; SCSEP's goal is to place 30% of its authorized
positions into unsubsidized employment annually.
To be eligible, participants must be at least 55 and have a family income of no more than
25% over the Federal poverty level. Enrollment priority is given to persons over age 60,
veterans, and qualified spouses of veterans. Preference is given to minority, limited
English-speaking, and Indian eligible individuals. Preference is also given to eligible
individuals who have the greatest economic need.
The federal poverty level in 2009 stood at
1 person in family = $10,830
2 = 14,570
3 = 18,310
4 = 22,050
5 = 25,790
6 = 29,530

35. 5/26/2010
7 = 33,270
8 = 37,010
And for families with more than 8 persons, add $3,740 for each additional person.
Program Funding: SCSEP is currently funded at approximately $571.9 million. All funds
are allocated by a formula; 22% of funds are allocated among states and territories, and
78% to national organizations that compete to provide services.
In 2009, the number of participants stood at 77,758 authorized positions, with an
additional 12,321 authorized positions funded by the American Reinvestment and
Recovery Act of 2009.
For Further Information regarding SCSEP programs in your area: contact your local One-
Stop Career Center through the Toll-Free Help Line at
1-877-US2-JOBS (1-877-872-5627),
The funding for job training provided by the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act
(ARRA) is a benefit for workers as this stimulus allocates billions for job-training. These
programs help workers retool their skills and reestablish themselves in viable career paths
according to Secretary of Labor Hilda Solis.
The major ARRA provisions include: $1.25 billion for dislocated adult workers, such as
those laid off or who have received advanced notice of a factory closing. $1.2 billion for
dislocated youth workers. $500 million in state grants for employment services, mainly
for low-income adults. $500 million to fund training for sustainable energy jobs.
Got that? Sustainable Energy job boom coming.
Dislocated Workers
The key to connecting with the new training money is local One-Stop Career Centers, the
federal government’s network of more than 3,000 employment-help offices.
Monster.com offers this example of how workers can use stimulus funding to make the
transition from a career in a depressed industry. A woman in suburban Cleveland loses
her job as a manufacturing technician, and goes to the County One-Stop Career Center, is
referred to a technical training program in allied health at the local community college.
She becomes a radiologic technologist and could earn the college’s computed
tomography certificate with both coursework and clinical experience. A radiologic
technician performs diagnostic imaging like MRI’s or magnetic resonance imaging, and
historically was referred to as X-Ray technicians. Now she can earn on average $55k a
year.

36. 5/26/2010
Check out
bls.gov
One-Stop gives a voucher to pay for college education so the unemployed should
consider this resource to provide money for retraining and this could be a once-in-a-
lifetime opportunity. Now, a voucher may mean the student has to cough up the money
and then get reimbursed, but this also depends on where you live, as each state makes up
their own rules. .
ARRA money for job training singles out two demographic groups: young people just
entering the workforce and older workers having difficulty finding or keeping a job. With
names like “Youth Ready” many cities are getting federal funding for internship and job-
training programs where they will about career opportunities by participating in activities
like job shadowing. These programs are for people aged 14 to 24 can call the program or
apply online.
ARRA is also making available additional funding for low-income workers age 55 and
up. The Senior Community Service Employment Program offers training and placement
in part-time service jobs at public agencies and nonprofits. Older workers should also
check with their local One-Stop Career Centers about training opportunities.
To learn more about federally funded training opportunities in your area or to contact a
specific program, contact your state’s Workforce Investment Act plans or Department of
Labor.
So, you can back to school and or get technical training if you are smart. Or you can sit
around and when your unemployment runs out, you can go get another stupid job.
###
Chapter Eight
Sell Yourself
You have to stop feeling sorry for yourself. Grow up and be mature and responsible. If
you’re having trouble with this, there are free mental health clinics that can counsel you
and don’t deny it if you are in trouble. Trust your feelings. When people lose their jobs,
they often lose their identity and self esteem. Many people do not know how to cope with
job loss and this contributes to suicide, workplace violence, and domestic disputes. Don’t
become a statistic, get help, and start marketing yourself. Take some personality tests to
determine your career interests.
Rejection

37. 5/26/2010
Develop a thick skin about rejection. There is a lot of rejection for people who put
themselves ‘out there,’ so don’t take it personally. Consider rejection a signal or a
guidepost. That was not the job for you. That was not a good place for you to be.
For example, one 55 year old woman was told after a series of interviews that they
decided to go ‘in a different direction’ and hire somebody ‘straight out of college,’ and
that was code for ‘you are too old.’
Sure, it’s degrading, but move on, who wants to work there if that’s how they feel – then
they are immature and threatened by older workers, and this is not a place where you
would be comfortable in the job.
Everything is Selling.
Everything is selling, so don’t kid yourself. You need to market yourself to the world,
and become your own best pitch person. You are your own product, so take inventory.
Even if you hate salespeople, selling, advertising, marketing, performing, dealing with
the public in general, everything is selling. You have to have an ‘act,’ and this act is what
you do to earn a living. This act can also include suppressing some your more annoying
habits. Most job seekers assume companies are looking for the contender with the best
education, the most experience and a well-written cover letter. They think their résumé
will speak for itself, says Dave Sanford, executive vice president of client services for
Winter, Wyman, a staffing firm. While these things are important, none of them is at the
top of an employer's list.
Do You Fit IN?
Fit, above all else, is what piques and keeps an employer's interest, Sanford says.
"It's not strictly within the position, as many candidates have sufficient technical skills to
perform within the job. Rather, fit within the corporate culture and within the business as
a whole," Sanford says. "Those 'soft' interpersonal skills are very important."
Remember Joe Pesci in the movie, My Cousin Vinnie?” His girlfriend says, “Oh, yeah,
you BLEND…”
Employers are also looking for a skill set match, says Jack Manning, president of
Manning Associates, an executive recruiting firm. "Candidates should expect to be asked
pointed questions concerning their skills and their applicability to the position being
interviewed for."
The biggest setback job seekers face is not articulating exactly what they bring to the
table, Sanford said. They can't clearly express their value and what sets them apart from
other candidates. If the job seeker doesn't seem interested, or there's no "spark," many
times, the candidate won't be offered the job.
Now that you know what employers are looking for when you interview and what's been
holding you back this far, here are some ways to score a job offer, according to our

38. 5/26/2010
experts. Selling yourself is key, especially if you have worked hard in school and in your
career; don't be afraid to share your accomplishments. A great way to sell yourself is in
your cover letter, says Kevin Donlin, creator of TheSimpleJobSearch.com. Include a
"P.S." at the end of your cover letter, Donlin suggests.
The "P.S." always gets read. The trick is including one so intriguing; employers won't
have any choice but to call you to learn more. Another tactic is to send the resume
certified mail, especially if you are angling for a creative job and need to show off your
wares. Email is anesthetizing and easily deleted, but if a FedEx or hard copy certified
package comes in, it will get noticed. Just make sure you don’t spill any white powdery
substances in there, so they have to call the Bomb Squad.
###
Chapter Nine
Temp Work
Sign up with temp agencies, recruiters, and jobsites
Stop gap, temp work, short term, contract employment is the best way to get employed
while being unemployed.
Some of these jobs lead to permanent jobs. It could be considered job-shopping as you
may get skills and experience in areas that are new to you, thus opening up brave new
worlds. You may work in industries you never would have been exposed to otherwise
and find new opportunities.
For one woman, Felicia, who started temping for law offices, discovered she had a knack
for legal work. She couldn’t believe the ‘private investigator’ who went out with a
Polaroid instant camera and took snapshots of broken sidewalk for the attorney, for his
‘trip and fall; personal injury business, and made $200 a pop. She wanted to do that.
Temps have a bad name, but their numbers have not diminished, and it’s a great way to
get into the job market, into a new field, and into a company that you want to work for.
It is also a way to find a job.
But, temp agencies aren’t the only game in town. The whole job market has changed to
one of temporary workers because highly paid computer consultants are paid to work on
a specific work project and are hired temporarily on contract. Here’s where the self
employment part comes in. They either work on a W2, a 1099 or a corporate contract,
meaning they formed their own corporation.
###

39. 5/26/2010
Chapter Ten
Get The Offer!
As in the military, they say ‘secure the objective,’ in terms of their mission. In the job
market, just get the job offer. Now, if you really want a job, you will take anything. You
don’t have to put it on your resume.
When you are done with the interview, ask for the job. Say, “This is a job I feel I would
do really well at and I would like to start working for you…” and then shake their hand,
look them in the eyes, and see their reaction.
But, if you need money, than you can deliver pizza, work at Target, spend Christmas at
the mall and get a discount. Whatever money you earned is deducted from your
unemployment benefits.
On the other hand, this stretches your benefits out a little while longer, while paying back
into the system. If you earn enough, you can requalify for unemployment benefits the
following year. So, working is good.
There are plenty of seasonal jobs, and you might just follow your nose to one of them.
Where do you shop?
One day, Kerry Smithson was shopping at her favorite store, Big Lots, and she mentioned
to the manager that he must be busy with all the traffic in the store. No, he replied, “I get
a commission off the sales, and make out great…” This surprised her, since Big Lots, in
case you don’t know is a liquidation store where you can find products that are being
discontinued, or have been tossed by larger stores to make room, and are greatly
discounted. The woman knew how much she spent at the store, and when an opening
came up, she applied.
Drug Testing and Credit Reporting
Not everybody wants to work in retail, and there are stricter hiring policies in many of the
larger retail outfits. Home Depot drug tests its employees, and many retailers run credit
checks on their prospective hires. Credit checks can put many out of the running, as a
‘repo,’ bankruptcy or credit card default are negatives that may prevent stores, banks, and
many financial institutions from hiring otherwise great employees.
And often, an applicant is asked to sign this or something similar:
DRUG SCREENING AND HEALTH ASSESSMENT
I understand and acknowledge that any offer of employment made to me by the Mega
Corpo Companies is contingent upon the outcome of a pre-employment screening for
illegal drugs to be arranged at the Companies' expense. I agree to supply a specimen of
my hair and/or urine for both testing and analysis, as required by the Companies, as a part

40. 5/26/2010
of the Companies' drug screening program, within 72 hours of the extended offer. Failure
to do so may result in the offer being withdrawn. I understand and acknowledge that if
either my urine or my hair specimen test positive for controlled substances, unless a
medical condition is established or the specimen shows evidence of adulteration or
substitution, or if my hair is cut, altered or removed prior to collection, I will not be hired
at the present time but can reapply for a position after one year from the date of my last
drug screening. I understand and acknowledge that if I fail to provide a specimen of my
urine or hair at or within one hour of the scheduled drug test that the offer of employment
may be withdrawn. Additionally, I understand and acknowledge that the MegaCorpo
Companies conduct a health assessment after any offer of employment is made.
FAIR CREDIT REPORTING ACT NOTICE AND DISCLOSURE
It is important that, as an applicant for a position with the Mega Corpo Companies, you
understand that a routine investigation of your background will be conducted. During this
investigation the Companies will obtain information (a "Consumer Report") about your
credit history, as permitted, as well as other information about your personal character.
The Companies may also elect to obtain information about your character, general
reputation, and mode of living, through personal interviews with friends, neighbors, and
acquaintances (an "Investigative Consumer Report"). If we decide to order an
Investigative Consumer Report, you will receive further notice regarding your rights
under the Fair Credit Reporting Act within three (3) days of the Investigative Consumer
Report being ordered. If employment is denied either wholly or partly because of
information in a Consumer Report, the Companies will advise you in writing and give
you the name and address of the reporting agency making the Consumer Report, a copy
of the Report, and a copy of "A Summary of Your Rights under the Fair Credit Reporting
Act".
Making false statements or withholding information on this application will disqualify
you for employment or, if hired, cause your subsequent dismissal. Consequently, it is
critical that you answer all questions thoroughly and honestly.
ACKNOWLEDGMENT AND CONSENT
As an applicant for a position with the MEGA CORPO Companies, I have thoroughly
and honestly answered all questions on the application and questionnaire(s) and will
continue to do so in response to future job-related questions from Company interviewers.
I understand and acknowledge that failure to do so will disqualify me from further
consideration or cause my subsequent dismissal.
I have read the foregoing notice and disclosure regarding my rights under the Fair Credit
Reporting Act, and I hereby authorize the MEGA CORPO Companies to order a
Consumer Report and/or Investigative Report in connection with my application for
employment with the Companies. If hired, I hereby further authorize the Companies to
order Consumer Reports and/or Investigative Reports from time to time as a condition of
employment with the Companies.
Military and Veterans

41. 5/26/2010
And if you are a vet, there are all kinds of perks for you.
There is the ARMY, the NAVY, the Marine Corps, The Coast Guard, The National
Guard, and according to your status, active duty, where you are located, and cost of living
(COLA) the pay ranges from 15,000 to $30,000 with E-1 being the lowest grade.
However you get food, shelter, and sometimes a tank to drive.
Vets and Disabled Vets
Right now, there are nearly three million disabled vets, and dozens of organization to
help them readjust to civilian life.
For Jobs, see:
Vetjobs.com
Va.gov/jobs
usajobs.gov
The Job
The military likes you to be physically fit, so if you don’t enjoy exercise, this is not for
you. And, forget about some basic freedom, because they drug test regularly, and
depending on where you are stationed, you may not be let off the base. On the other hand,
great health care, training, education, home loans, and many other perks await the
honorably discharged vet. And, they have bases in Hawaii, but also, Afghanistan. And,
there’s a lot of social control so if you have issues with authority, you may not be a good
fit, but they will let you know pretty quickly.
Check out
Goarmy.com
Immigrants
The military is also an avenue of employment for many. The armed forces also serve as a
pathway to citizenship for immigrants who are awarded US citizen status often within six
months. The all-volunteer military is stretched thin and those living in this country on
temporary visas, permanent residents with ‘green’ cards are all eligible to enlist. For
more information, see:
Military.com
Government Jobs
Usually when there is a recession, government spending increases and this means jobs.
One mainstay of jobs is the IRS or internal revenue service, so if you have a knack for
accounting, bookkeeping, and tax law, apply here.
The government has plenty of other jobs, however, but they also have the most arduous
tests and applications. Since they started the EEO or Equal Opportunity Commission,

42. 5/26/2010
they have you fill out this information ad nauseum, so if you are multi-racial, a veteran,
disabled, please apply, since you are given preference. So if you want to work for the
CIA, the Forest Service, the FBI, the IRS, the BIA, The BLM, the HUD, ICE, the ATF –
for a job, visit:
USA.gov
USAjobs.gov
Drink a cup of coffee; you will have to stay for awhile. On the other hand, government
workers rarely get fired, don’t pay into social security, and get a separate retirement
pension. Rumor has it that it can take up to a year to get hired by the FEDS.
Back to the job offer – or not!
Rejection
Don’t take it personally. You can’t. If you take every rejection personally, you will
commit suicide, go on a drinking bender, or kill somebody. Grow a thick skin, and slough
off each disappointment, rejection, and snotty encounter, with ‘there is something better
for me.’ That was not it. The universe will provide.
Affirmations work wonders: Remember Elmer Fudd who walked around saying, “I am a
millionaire, I own a mansion and a yacht”? Do the same, except, say, “I now have a job I
love and enjoy, that pays me well and at which I excel…”
Now, go get a job!
For more information: contact perishpublishing@earthlink.net
Job Shark 1.0
To be continued….