Building resilience and wellbeing in young people through positive psychology

Talking to young people about
self-harm
Dr. Bridie Gallagher
Clinical Psychologist
Visit: www.hsrpsychology Follow us @hsrpsychology

Outline
• Why do young people self-harm
• Why we think rates are increasing
• How to sensitively approach young people
• do's and don'ts from young people
• Managing risk in school settings
Follow us @hsrpsychologyVisit: www.hsrpsychology

Non Suicidal Self Injury, Self Injurious
Behaviour
• Deliberate act that is intended to damage tissue but not to end life
• Cutting
• Scratching
• Eating harmful substances
• Overdosing on prescription medication
• Tying ligatures
• What is it not?
• “Parasuicide”
• Relationship of self-harm to suicide is that most people who complete
suicide have not self-harmed but young people who self-harm are at
increased risk of suicide (approx. 2-3x more likely).

Why?
All behaviour is a communication:
“Attention seeking” and “manipulating” unhelpful language
• “To see if anyone cared”
• “To feel something”
• “Physical pain is easier to deal with”
• “To punish myself”
• To not feel or help to manage emotional pain
• Grounding when dealing with traumatic flashbacks or high levels of
anxiety
• Seeking the love and care that they need

• They have experienced trauma that they have not been supported to
overcome (e.g. domestic violence, loss, sexual abuse)
• They do not have the coping skills to deal with their emotions
• Double disability

Self-harm – a thoroughly modern problem?
•14-24% estimates in adolescent population
•Higher rates in females, LGBT community, BME
communities.
•Also associated with adolescent identity (emo/goth)
•Increasing rates? Not enough/good enough data
• Just more talked about?

Why might it be increasing?
• Socially accepted – social media
• Rising inequality
• Less connected
• Shame and social media
• Child abuse

How to approach it…
•Self-harm is letting you know that a young person
cannot cope and doesn’t have another person to help
them calm down/feel OK
•All about building trust and letting them know this is a
safe relationship
•If they have let you know, then they want your help,
they might not know what help.
•By being curious and empathic you are already
intervening in a helpful way

Do’s
•Take your time and choose your place
•Listen carefully
•Write things down if you need to
•Seek support from colleagues
•Think “child protection”
•Keep calm - pay attention to your own level of anxiety
•Just be with them

Helpful questions…
•How often is this happening?
•When did it start?
•Are there other ways you have hurt yourself?
•Have you told anyone else?
•Are you using any chat groups or forums for support or
information?
•Is there anything that you need help with?
•Is there anyone hurting or scaring you?

Don’ts
•Ask why (but don’t forget to be curious)
•Try to “cheer them up” thinking about positives
•Say their worries are “silly” or not true
e.g. “of course your parents love you!”
•Try to scare them into stopping
•Try to do “deals” to get them to stop
•Agree to keep any secrets

Risk management…
• All about relationships… a curious empathic person at school can reduce the
need to self-harm
• Accept the feelings and the pain… it WILL NOT make them harm more
• If no support from CAMHS…
• Offer a key person for support
• Check in every day
Safety planning
• What should we look out for? (Warning signs)
• What helps? What doesn’t help? (Do’s and Don’ts for staff at school)
• What can you do to soothe yourself? E.g. take time out, colouring, call your auntie,
go to the school nurse for a hug)
• What can you say to yourself? “I got through this before I can do it again”
• Who can you approach/talk to? Named person.

Strong feelings...
Young people who self-harm have often experienced abuse and neglect
They have well developed ways of managing their relationships that have kept
them safe in the past e.g.
• Making people pay attention and be worried about them
• Keeping people at arms length and relying only on themselves
• Pushing people away when they get too close
• Testing whether adults care about them
These behaviours can make it hard to be close to the young person and make
you feel angry, rejected, or as if you are the only person in the world who can
help.

Building resilience and
wellbeing through positive
psychology
Dr. Rachael King
Educational and Child Psychologist

Outline
• What is wellbeing?
• Wellbeing in schools
• An introduction to positive psychology
• Techniques for building resiliency in young people

Wellbeing
• 'Subjective Well-being’ is the Scientific Term for Happiness

10 keys to happier living
• Everyone's path to happiness is different, but the
research suggests ten things consistently tend to
have a positive impact on people's overall
happiness and well-being.
• What are they?

Benefits of wellbeing
Social
Work
Health
Personal
Meta-analysis by Lyubomirsky, King & Diener (2005)

Challenges to Wellbeing
• Rise in mental health problems
• Social media and technology
• Increased fear
• Family/community breakdown, increase of
divorce, social isolation
• Increased expectations and pressures on young
people

What is positive psychology?
• The study of positive emotions and positive
character traits.
• Broad aims
Increasing positive emotions.
Reducing the impact of negative emotions.
Changing the subject: thinking about others rather than ourselves and
engaging in purposeful activity.
Finding meaning in one’s life.

Wellbeing and resilience
• Wellbeing is a psychological state at a point in time
• Resilience is dynamic, taking into account the past
and the future
• Wellbeing is strongly correlated with resilience
• How we feel today can prepare us for what is
coming
• How resilient we are can impact on our sense of
wellbeing

Techniques for building resiliency
 Strengths
 Mindfulness
 Gratitude
 Extra acts of kindness
Individual
Groupwork
Whole
class/school

Strengths
• Generates optimism
• Sense of direction
• Fulfillment
• Achieve goals
• Build self esteem
• Carry out the VIA Character Strengths assessment (takes up to
30 minutes): www.viacharacter.org/www/the-survey
• Strength cards

Mindfulness
• Paying attention to the present moment
• Can improve awareness and regulation of thoughts
and feelings
• Can boost concentration
• Mindfulness games, snacktime, apps (eg. Smiling
Mind), mindful breathing
• You can follow a free 10-day daily guided
meditation on the Headspace website:
www.headspace.com/register/free-trial

Gratitude
• Three Good Things
• Gratitude Diary -Write about 2-3 things that you
are grateful for:
 Make them recent (e.g., last 24hrs)
 Make them specific (e.g., morning coffee, walked the dog, chat with my sister)
 Online gratitude diary and challenge www.thnx4.org
• Letter of thanks
• App ‘The gratitude garden’

Extra Acts of Kindness
• Such as, a smile, offer your seat on a bus, thank someone, help a
neighbour
• Studies found significant increases in well-being after 6 weeks of 5
random acts of kindness a week (Lyubomirsky et al., 2004)
• Kindness UK day November 13th
http://kindnessuk.com/world_kindness_day_kindness_day_uk.php
"if you want to feel
good, do good"

Resources
• Action pack
http://www.actionforhappiness.org/media/80216
/happiness_action_pack.pdf
• Test your happiness
https://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/t
estcenter
• Resources for schools
http://kindnessuk.com/schools/resources.php
• Self esteem journal (handout)

Self care
• Many of these techniques and strategies can be
used for yourself and your team
• Prevent burnout
• Identify stressors
• Maximise personal resources
• Reignite passion and energy for your job
• Self care assessment

Thank You!
References available on request
Rachael@hsrpsychology.co.uk
“Happiness is always here, it is always now.” Osho

References
• MacConville, R. & Rae, T. (2012). Building Happiness, Resilience and Motivation in
Adolescents: A Positive Psychology Curriculum for Well-Being. Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
• Mguni, N, Bacon, N. & Brown, J.F. (2012). The wellbeing and resilience paradox. Young
Foundation.
• Seligman, M. (2003) Authentic Happiness: Using the New Positive Psychology to Realize
Your Potential for Lasting Fulfilment. New York: Free Press

Thanks for listening!
The End

Building resilience and wellbeing in young people through positive psychology

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