Networking for Success Second Edition

Dr. Leahcim Semaj
www.LTSemaj.com
Dr. Sandra M. Palmer
www.DrSandraPalmer
.guru

Social Network’ing’
KEMAL BROWN
SOLUTIONS OFFICER,
THE JOBBANK
DIGITAL CONSULTANT

12/4/2015 www.SlideShare.net/LSemaj 5

Objectives
 Become a magnet for attracting the right people in
your space
 Create a master plan before attending any event and
execute
 Stop handing out business cards and make real
connections
 Become the go to person in your sphere of influence
 Command any room the minute you walk in
 Join any conversation at any event
 Become the most liked person at an event
12/4/2015 6www.SlideShare.net/LSemaj

Objectives cont’d
 Be always warm and open to starting a
conversation
 Make building and managing your network
a part of who you are
 Take your networking to the net
 How to build a network
 See your career, business, practice and
personal relationships take off

WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

What is Networking?
 Why is it important to anyone who wants to
succeed
 Critical to personal, career and business
development
 Successful persons create and nurture a network of
contacts
 Your income can grow only to the extent that you
grow
 I create my life versus what happens to me

What is Networking?
Essentially, networking is getting to
know people who can help you develop
your career, business or personal
prospects .
You don't need to be a big shot or the
most outgoing person in the world to
network effectively.
Its simply connecting with people

Networking: definitions…
 A supportive system of sharing information
and services among individuals and groups
having a common interest
[http://dictionary.reference.com]
 Creating a group of acquaintances and
associates and keeping it active through
regular communication for mutual benefit
[www.businessdictionary.com]
Networking depends on relationships

One simple rule
 “It takes only a moment’s conscious decision
to become a networker, with no interference
to one’s daily routine.
 All it requires is a slight shift in attitude, and
adopting one simple trifurcated rule:
 Greet each new acquaintance with an
openness to learn more about that person, a
willingness to help, and an offer to stay in
touch.”
[Buzzy Gordon - http://entrepreneurs.about.com]

How big is your network?
People you
have known
in the past
People you
know now
People you
will know in
the future

Dunbar’s number
 150 = the maximum number
of people with whom we can
maintain relationships
 Hypothesis by primatologist Robin
Dunbar that 150 is the maximum
number of social interactions you
can manage
 It is the number at which groups
start to break down
 The number is higher or lower
across different species of social
primates

Map your network
My Network
Prof. Orgs. Universities Friends Suppliers Customers
Colleagues

What are the benefits of
networking?
 A lot of good jobs never make it to the pages of a
recruitment website or newspaper.
 They get filled by word of mouth and the more
senior the position, the more often it happens this
way.
 Even if the job is advertised, it helps to know
someone inside the new organisation who can give
you the inside line.
 They may even end up interviewing you which will
always make it a less stressful experience

What are the benefits of
networking?
 Access to their rolodex
 Ability to genuinely helps others
 Inability to network can hinder your
performance on the job, in business and in
personal life
 In the end business is conducted through
personal relationships
 Cannot focus only on financial aspect

Operational
• People who can help you
get your work done
• Often internal & current-
focused
Personal
grow personally &
professionally
• Usually external & share
common interests
Strategic
shape your future goals &
direction
• May be internal or external
& are future-oriented
3 reasons for networking
How Leaders Create and Use Networks
by Herminia Ibarra and Mark Hunter HBR Jan. 2007

Networking vs. Relationship Building
 The word “networking” is commonly used to
describe the process of cultivating business
relationships.
 There’s nothing inherently wrong with
networking, but it often has the connotation of
being manipulative and self-serving.
 Should we shy away from it?
 No matter how good your service or product is you
are in the people business

Not all network contacts are equal
Networks contain a small number of
people that have proportionately more
influence over the network than others
This 5-10% of individuals, called
critical connectors by organisational
anthropologist Karen Stephenson,
occupy specific places within networks
Ref: http://goo.gl/mWXgA

Hubs, Gate-keepers & Pulse-takers
Hubs are directly
connected to many
people and, as a result,
have the ability to
disseminate
information quickly
Gatekeepers stand
at the intersection
between parts of the
organisation, or areas
of expertise
Pulse-takers are the
covert influencers
within networks who
are often more
knowing than
known, and they
connect with others
strategically

Your networking plan
Map your
network
Identify
your critical
connections
Engage and
add value
Develop &
grow your
network

Introverts and Extroverts
Introverts
 Think, then speak
 Prefer small groups
 Comfortable being alone
 Know a few people well
 Take risks, carefully (!)
 Solitude is a catalyst for their
creativity
 Focus on one thing at a time
Extroverts
 Speak, then think
 Enjoy being in bigger groups
 Have lots of friends
 Get their energy from other
people
 Dive into new situations with
energy
 Thrive on surprises and not
knowing “what’s up”
 Good multi-taskers

If you’re an Introvert…
 It’s not about selling yourself, it’s about helping other people
 It’s not about becoming popular, it’s about learning and sharing
 If it’s hard to talk to strangers, make it easy for them to talk to you
 Ask good questions (Open Questions)
 Be more interested in them than in yourself
 Look for ways to help them
 Follow-up meetings with ideas, offers to help, recommendations
 Make it easy for others to find you (use online tools)
 Most of these apply to Extroverts too!

But I’m Too Shy!
What is shyness?
What are the symptoms?
How to handle shyness?
If your goal is to be comfortable
chances you will never be successful
The only time you are growing is
when you are uncomfortable

socially awkward moments aren’t
survival threats

Social anxiety has deep roots;
 in our primordial past, belonging to a group
was essential to survival.
Social anxiety is nature’s way of ensuring
that we do what we have to do to stay with
the pack.
Even though today we live in a pretty safe
environment and don’t have to worry about
dying if we’re not part of a social group, our
brains continue to gin up massive amounts
of stress and anxiety at the specter of being
rejected.

that’s out of sync with our
modern environment?

When you start feeling
 those anxious, shy feelings,
 keep repeating to yourself:
 “Everything’s fine.
 My brain thinks it’s 10,000 BC and is
overreacting.
 I’m not in danger of dying on the savanna.
 I’m not in danger of dying on the savanna.”
 Decide that it’s okay if some people don’t like
you
 (you don’t like some people, after all!).

springs from the fact that we
want everyone to like us.

If someone doesn’t seem to like you
 it can be crushing, or at least irksome.
 “Why doesn’t he think I’m cool?!”
 You start to feel there’s something intrinsically wrong
with you.
 But no one is universally liked;
 even very popular “nice guy” celebrities like Bill Crosby
have their haters.
 And that’s okay!
 Everyone’s personality jibes with different people.
 Your personality just isn’t going to align with some
folks.

Remember, there are people you don’t
like too!
And you probably don’t generate
terrible thoughts about them
either, but simply think,
“That’s just not my type of person.”
So don’t take it personally if
others don’t seem to get you.

First,
simply work on making more eye
contact with people.
When the cashier asks if you
found everything you were
looking for, look her in the eye
when you say yes.

Then,
work on asking a single question to people
you engage with in passing interactions.
When you get your daily coffee, ask your
server how her day is going.
If you need help finding something at a
store, ask a clerk to help you.
After a college class, ask your professor to
expand on something he touched on in the
lecture.

Next,
try to engage people with some back and
forth questions and get a short conversation
going.
Treat your small, everyday social
interactions like little experiments.
See what happens when you engage people
socially instead of simply avoiding them.
You may be surprised to learn that
socializing isn’t that scary after all and won’t
lead to existential annihilation.

If you have severe shyness,
 and can’t even begin to look people in the eye?
 my somewhat unorthodox advice would be to first make
strenuous physical feats a regular part of your life.
 Do HIIT workouts at least a couple times a week.
 Take cold showers a few times a week.
 Take up long-distance race walking/running.
 Becoming comfortable will physical discomfort won’t
automatically make you comfortable with socializing,
 but it will build your confidence and create a
foundation for the belief that your will is capable
of bossing your fearful mind.

Can’t Do That?
 There’s no easy answer.
 As Yoda wisely put it,
 “Do or do not. There is no try.”
 You have to reach a point where you simply take
a big breath and jump in.
 Nearly every good thing in life, from our physical
health to our social prowess, is predicated on
the ability to put aside immediate fear and
discomfort for a long-term reward.
 Strengthening your will is the prerequisite for all
other progress.

Shyness researchers
have found that people forget themselves
and their anxiety more easily
if they’re involved in activities that are
helpful to others and give them a pre-
determined role or job.
For example,
many self-described shy people don’t have
any problem talking to strangers if it’s part
of their job.

Consider volunteering your services
for organizations that align with your
interests and values.

Be yourself, at least for now.
what is the “self”?
If temperament and personality is 50%
inherited, is your self your genetics?
Is it the other 50% — the particular way you
happened by chance to be raised?
Is it an amalgamation of the millions of
commercials you’ve seen on TV and online
that has influenced your perspective in ways
you’re not consciously aware of?

More importantly,
 what if your self would like to sit at home in a
sweat suit 24/7, playing video games, and
eating choclate?
Should you still be “true to yourself”?
 Rather than being yourself,
 I think you should decide who you want to be,
find an ideal, and act in accordance with it.
 Take whatever you think is inherent to your
personality and marshal it towards excellence.

Implementation is simple:
when you reach a point where you get tired
of your shyness, say to yourself
“F it! This is dumb!
I’m just going to start acting confident.”
And then you do so;
act loose and relaxed, look people in the
eye, and start talking to them.
Works like a charm.

To Deposit in
My Social Capital Account?

Nothing to deposit in my social
capital account?
Networking for Students
Young entrepreneurs
Graduates
Early career professionals

 Take the role of the mentee
 Believe in your vision and share it
 Find your tribe
 Use school connections to your advantage
 Know your target and go out
 Know where you fall in the pecking order
 Ask great questions
 Interview successful people and ask them to help
other students by sharing their knowledge

 Use the classes you take – Get an A and
others will take you seriously
 Lead a group. Help others succeed
 Go online and be credible – no one can tell
you age except you state it or share a picture
 Volunteer and deliver
 Find opportunities to prove yourself before
meeting with anyone in person

THAT’S WORTH MILLIONS

Building a network that’s worth
millions
 What if you maintained contact with all
the persons you had great relationships or
interactions with since childhood?
 What would that be worth over a life
time?
 Where do you start?
 How to create a system that works for you?

Many Options
 Old school, college or university classmates, alumni
 Family members and their friends
 Professional organisations
 Trade organisations
 Professionals -doctor, lawyer or accountant, etc.
 Club members or anyone else you meet socially
 Civic and charitable organisations
 Faith based organisations
 Professors, advisers, coaches
 Former or present work colleagues or bosses
 Pick up a sport – golf, tennis, sailing, shooting

How to decide what to do and
where?
 What are you interested in?
 What’s your passion?
 What inspires you?
 Shared beliefs, experiences – child with
special needs, same faith, giving back
(ability to do more with others)
 Only works if you do the work – get to know
people, work on projects, deliver

Build Relationships in Diverse Ways
 The world has gotten quite complex –
Facebook, Linkedin, etc.
 Remember the 6-degrees-of-separation
principle.
 Go to reunions
 Join your alumni
 Simply provide good service
 Go after the # 2 person to reach a power
broker12/4/2015 64www.SlideShare.net/LSemaj

 Don't ask directly for a job - networking is not a job
fair; it's an opportunity to gather potentially useful
information.
 Give and take - networking is a two-way exchange,
there's no such thing as a free lunch.
 Do the groundwork - research your contacts before
meeting them and always follow up good leads or pass
them on.
 Think laterally – try to expand your network
outwards, beyond your comfort zone or usual sphere
of operation.
 Patience is a virtue – getting involved in networking
is being in there for the long haul; don't expect to land
a plum job at your first meeting.

 How you do anything is how you do everything
 Be a class act
 Be impeccable in your words
 When in doubt check
 Practice uncommon appreciation
 Better to say no than to break your word
 Give more to get more without immediate
benefit
 Find a way to serve – Webinar, Blog, Newsletter

 Drop out of the ‘Ain’t it awful club’. No one
wants to hear your complaints [except those
who are in your inner circle]
 Ask, Ask, Ask
 Act in spite of fears because it is not
necessary to try to get rid of fear in order to
succeed
 The informational interview

A NETWORKING EVENT

Planning effectively for a networking event
3 Phases Pre-Event, The Event, Post Event
Pre-Event
- Why are you going,
- What do you want to accomplish
- Who will be there you want to see/meet?
- What’s the dress code? Can you comply?
- Am I current on what’s happening?
- Can I be of service?
- Be conversant in topics of interest to your target
(sports, current affairs, music, etc.)

At the Event
 - Be pleasant
 - Smile and make eye contact with others
 - Enter the room with confidence
 - When you start a conversation do not hold
the person captive , circulate
 - Pick out the wall flowers standing by
themselves nursing a drink and engage
them

At the Event
 - Do not pass out your business cards like
confetti
 - Ask someone for their card first
 - Focus on making a connection
 - Ask great question – not ‘What do you do?’
 - LISTEN
 Be helpful by playing host
 Focus on quality not quantity
 Promise to follow-up

Listen!!!
 Ask a question and wait to get an answer
 Do not interrupt! Its rude. It says what I have to say is
more important
 Don’t just wait to speak and formulate your thoughts
 Pay attention
 Put away the Smartphone
 Do not try to show –off with the on-up manship or
womanship
 Make the other person feel important
 Don’t flaunt your accomplishments
 Become a master Listener and see your popularity soar!

Post Event
 Start building the relationships
 Do what you promised to do. E.g. Call, set a
time to get together right away. Do not delay.
 Review the notes you made, shared interest
 Determine how you can be of value
 Keep in touch in a consistent way
 Share - ideas, articles, tickets, products,
lunch
 Nurture the relationship

Mastering the art of conversation
and meeting people anywhere
 Every master was once a disaster
 Hone your social skills
 Have something interesting to share
 Keep abreast of current affairs and local
happenings
 Let the other person talk and really listen
 Be pleasant and treat everyone the same
 Make Relationship Building a Way of Life

How to make instant connection
and build rapport with anyone
 Ask a thoughtful question
 Ask what you can do to help
 Give them a reason to remember you.
 Focus on quality not quantity
 Ask what makes them happy, excited, lose
sleep
 Remember their name and story.

Don’t let your business card end
up in the trash can!
 Clearly define what you do best.
 Tell a story
 Smile and make eye contact
 Say their name
 Send an intro email on the spot
 Talk about your passions
 Give a genuine compliment

Nurturing your Network and
setting targets
 Want to or committed to? 99% or 100%
 The #1 reason most people don’t get what they
want is because they don’t know what they want.
 Be committed to promoting yourself and your
value
 Return phone calls immediately
 Connect people – refer and let your contact know
 Restore damage relationships – communicate,
clean-up, apologise, forgive, be sincere

The Power of Karma
 Give outside of the giving season
 Share tickets to games, concerts, plays,
movies and sit together. Lunch, dinner,
breakfast.
 Celebrate others’ success every chance you
get – promotion, national award, children’s
success
 Determine how you can be of value

Nurturing your Network
 Always be thinking about the other person, not
personal gain.
 Maximize access.
 Don't go for meaningless "numbers".
 Systematize it.
 Always be connecting.
 Dedicate real and meaningful time.
 Be a hybrid.
 Above all else, be there to help people.

Nurturing your Network
 Have the right mindset -Networking is more like
farming than hunting.
 Have the tools to network with you at all times.
 Listen and ask questions.
 Small courtesies count a lot in today’s world
 Make a point to meet new people.
 Write notes on the backs of business cards you
collect.
 Be yourself.
 Follow up!

Is your Network Dying?
 We make ~2000 contact by age 35
 At any one time we can maintain 150 fairly
good relationships
 People go away or grow away
 What happens as we build new relationships?
 How do we maintain old relationships?
 Telltale questions you have a problem
 You can’t afford this as traditional marketing
is more expensive/less effective

Taking Our NetworksToThe Net
•Now if the aim of networking is to connect
with likeminded professionals to help you
achieve your professional goals while
making meaningful contributions, then
social media is the perfect vehicle.
•Social media allows you to reach, anyone,
anywhere, anytime. It possesses the
astonishing capability to create a one-to-
one personal connection with virtually
anyone – the wonders of the perfect cold
message or email.

A Few StatisticsTo KickThings Off
•94% of recruiters use, or plan to use social media
for recruiting. This number has increased steadily
for the last 6 years.
•Employers who used social media to hire found
a 49% improvement in candidate quality over
candidates sourced only through traditional
recruiting channels.
•89% of all recruiters report having hired
someone through LinkedIn. Facebook and
Twitter trailed by a wide margin, reaching only
26% and 15% respectively.

"We are CEOs of our own companies: Me
Inc.To be in business today, our most
important job is to be head marketer of a
brand calledYou.” –
Tom Peters, Branding Expert

•Personal branding, then, is key to optimize your
social networking – a great personal brand is like a
well sharp business suit – it makes you look good.
•Before going to any event use social media to do a
bit of research on your prospects – the people you
would like to meet.
•Keep consistency across all your profiles, when
you show people who you are they will believe
you.
•LinkedIn is the best network for networking as it
allows each of us to display digital resumes for the
perusal of prospects.
A FewTips For Effective Social Networking

Why LinkedIn
•Over 60% of users make more than
US$75,000 a year, 40% of users make
$100,000 or more annually. - Stephanie
Sammons, social media strategist.
•It exists for one reason – professional
connections to add value.
•Attract opportunities and influential
people – create smart networks – quality
over quantity.

•Do treat your profile as your professional brochure. Use
an appropriate-looking profile image and put in
complete and up-to-date information.This will be your
first impression for many.
•Don't blanket connect. Before you ask for a connection,
learn about the candidate. Be ready to explain why they
should connect with you.
•Do get intentional testimonials and endorsements that
speak to your actual skills.
•Do reach out and make meaningful connections.Take
the time to find common ground based on your profiles
and consider how you can bring reciprocal value.
•Do get intentional testimonials and endorsements that
speak to your actual skills.
LinkedIn Dos….

•Don't let your profile sit inactive. Even if you only
post an update once a week, keep it alive.
•Don't treat LinkedIn as a chore. Dedicate real time
and effort to make the most of your connections,
and you'll establish worthwhile, long-term
relationships.
•Don't create verbiage combinations that no one
understands.
•Don't hog the conversations in groups or make it
your personal soapbox.You should always
consider others and bring value with every post.
LinkedIn Don’ts….

But
First
Let’s
Take A
Selfie!!

Mistakes to avoid
 Resenting those who are successful
 Focusing on yourself and past
accomplishments
 Asking someone for help when you have not
spoken to them in ages.
 Over sharing personally or professionally
 Talking too much
 Promoting several things at once

of NETWORKING

Summary - The 10 Commandments
For Better Networking:
1 Always have your tools.
2 Networking is more like farming than hunting.
3 Understand where you are in the pecking order
4 People remember engaging people
5 The law of Karma is real
6 The little things count for much.
7 Grow Your Quality Network
8 Have a Good Business card strategy
9 Keep it Real - First Impressions Last
10 Close the circuit - Follow up!

Your action plan…
See it
Say it
Write itDo it
Review it

Next Steps
 What will you do in the next 24 hours?
 What will you do in the next week?
 What will you you do in the next month?

Dr. Leahcim Semaj
Chief Ideator &
Resultant
The JobBank
12/4/2015 Leading Change 112
Keep In Touch!

12/4/2015 LEADING CHANGE 113
Dr. Sandra Palmer
Chief Dream Builder
Peak Performance
Int’l
Keep In Touch!

www.facebook.com/kemallbrown
@kemallbrown
@kemallbrown
Thank You!
jm.linkedin.com/in/kemallbrown

Networking for Success Second Edition

Networking for Success Second Edition

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