2. TODAY’S CONTENT
Content
Personal Introduction
The Samaritans- who are they & what’s in it for me?
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Why is knowing your personality type vital for Emotional Intelligence?
9 Personality Types and their relationship with Loneliness.
Recap
Contact Details
3. WHO AM I & WHAT DO I
OFFER?
❑Barrister: various in-house roles in financial
services area.
❑Trainer: train in legal and financial services areas
in negotiation, leadership and emotional
intelligence.
❑Author: Published ‘Stop Being Your Self’
December 2021.
❑Author: ‘Stop Being Your Self- in negotiations and
leadership’ (due for publication early 2023).
5. SAMARITANS- WHAT'S IN IT FOR
ME?
• Active Listening &
Empathy.
• No approval or
admiration.
• Culture of talk.
• Focus on others.
• Arrests Judgment &
Improves tolerance.
• Emotional Triggers.
6. WHAT IS EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE?
Part 1: ‘the
ability to identify
our emotions as
they arise and to
respond in an
appropriate
manner’.
Part 2: ‘to be
able to read the
emotions of
others in our
interactions and
to respond with
empathy’.
7. WHY IS KNOWING YOUR PERSONALITY TYPE
VITAL FOR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE?
IDENTIFY AND LABEL
EMOTIONS.
MENTAL SPACE AND
AWARENESS- NOT ACT OUT.
EMOTIONAL REGULATION.
8. TYPE 1: THE PERFECTIONIST
PRINCIPLED/ ACCURATE/ REFORMING V JUDGMENTAL/IMPATIENT/INNER-CRITIC
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
Do I feel Lonely?
➢ No- my focus is on how to do
things the right way, and you
will have had to do
something wrong to be
lonely.
➢ Maybe- if they admit they
are wrong and need
something reformed.
➢ But, I am a principled person,
so it would be the right thing
to do.
9. TYPE 2: THE GIVER
CARING/ OPEN/ HELPFUL V APPROVAL/ INDISPENSABLE/ GUILT
Do I feel Lonely?
➢Yes, but I will deny it as I do
not like to admit I have needs
of my own.
➢Feelings of Loneliness peak
when exhausted through serving
others and not receiving
approval.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢Absolutely, that is what I was
put on this earth to do- help
others in need.
10. TYPE 3: THE PERFORMER
ACCOMPLISHED/ EFFICIENT/ SELF ASSURED V IMAGE CONSCIOUS/ WORKAHOLIC/ COMPARING
Do I feel Lonely?
➢No, I don’t have time to feel
lonely.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢Don’t stress me out, you know I
hate emotionally needy people.
➢But, maybe getting them
onboard will ensure we get this
project finished more quickly and
I am people’s greatest
cheerleader when they striving
for success.
11. TYPE 4: THE INDIVIDUALIST
SPECIAL/ DISCERNING/ METAPHYSICAL V MISUNDERSTOOD/ INTENSE/ VOCATION
Do I feel Lonely?
➢Yes, I spend a lot of time
feeling totally alone in this
world- no one understands me.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢Absolutely, I get such a high
from helping people that are
emotionally distraught.
12. TYPE 5: THE OBSERVER
SCHOLAR/ SELF SUFFICIENT/ COMPOSED V DETACHED/ ISOLATE/ DRAINED
Do I feel Lonely?
➢No, not really, I love to be
alone- I find people very
draining.
➢But, because I spend so much
time alone, the isolation
eventually leads to anxiety and
depression.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢No, people and their emotions
are not my department. I can
speak at length about a
psychological definition of
loneliness- if that helps?
13. TYPE 6: THE DEVIL’S ADVOCATE
LOYAL/ ANALYTICAL/ DISCERNING V PROCRASTINATION/ PARANOID/ REBELLING OR ACCEPTANCE
Do I feel Lonely?
➢No, my focus is on who I can
trust out there in the world.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢Maybe, if you are in my circle
of trust, I will be 100% loyal
and supportive to you.
➢But, if I don’t trust or like you,
your loneliness and emotions just
make me more anxious than I am
already.
14. TYPE 7: THE OPTIMIST
CHARISMATIC/ IMAGINATIVE/ VERSATILITY V OPTIONS/ FANTASIST/ CHARM
Do I get Lonely?
➢No!!! Life is an amazing and
exciting adventure- don’t waste
your time being lonely!
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢I am a natural at lifting the mood
and keeping spirits high in the
workplace, so I suppose I would!
➢I just don’t see the point in being
negative or negative emotions- lets
make a joke and shake the loneliness
off!
15. TYPE 8: THE BOSS
STRONG/ ACTION-ORIENTATED/ PROTECTIVE V CONTROLLING/ CONFLICT/ VULNERABILITY
Do I get Lonely?
➢This is a definitive no from me-
I don’t get lonely, I take
ACTION!
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢If they are on my side, I will
support and back them to the
grave. No one will mess with
you, until we get you well again.
16. TYPE 9: THE MEDIATOR
CALMING/ UNDERSTANDING/ EMPATHETIC V STUBBORN/ DECISIONS/ PRIORITISING
Do I get Lonely?
➢No, my peace in life is
unshakable.
➢But, when I space out too long
to anything like tv or music, and I
am not in a supportive regular
routine, I can feel isolated and
down.
Will I support a Lonely Colleague?
➢I get along with everyone, of
course I will. No better person than
myself for understanding people’s
point of view.
➢But, I do tend to minimise difficult
emotions and I might not pick up on
emotional cues unless the person
actually says it to me!
17. THANK YOU
❑Contact for training needs discussion:
info@stopbeingyourself.ie
❑Go to website for more information:
https://stopbeingyourself.ie
❑Buy a copy of ‘Stop Being Your Self’:
Stop Being Your Self: A unique and
practical take on the Enneagram
personality framework: Amazon.co.uk:
Gallagher, Ronan: 9798760357281:
Books