If your fundraising appeals aren't bringing in the kind of responses you'd hoped for, maybe the problem is your message.

1. + your
Do
Dear Donor,
As I reflect on the many blah, blah, blah, one of
annual appeal blah, blah, significant
to engage blah, blah
has been the blah, blah
and our mission to blah,
letters blah, principles of a three-pronged approach.
suffer from Blah blah, economic downturn, blah blah
the dreaded
believe that every one should have blah, blah,
blah, and a chance to blah, blah the future in
blah-blahs?
order to blah, blah, vitally important blah,
blah, blah, regardless of blah, blah, blah.
Every year, nonprofits churn out thousands of appeal letters
hoping their message will make us open our wallets.
Linda Ziskind / z2 Consulting
NTEN 2011
Ignite Presentation

2. +
Cartoon by the brilliantly funny Gary Larsen
But the reality is different. No matter how compelling we think our message is, if
it isn’t meaningful to the audience, it’s just a bunch of blah-blah.

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and effective com oration, problem
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While we have tr
aditionally relied
regional foundati on the generosit
ons, we can no y of
longer depend o
This year, the needs of our Foundation n the
are greater than ever before. Your
donation to our annual appeal will
directly support the Foundation. This,
g this
in turn directly supports the mission of id durin to
cial a ble
the museum and enables us to offer
for finan ion availa
s t
programs for all ages, such as the quest educa y
ted re is unique d is greatl
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We a y. Your a gardless o v es of eir future
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econo qualify, r
e the li th
aff ected d them in
ho ve re
all w iated. we ha inspi
Here’s the problem: boil all the appr ec c ause y that we
e? Be sa
u giv timonials
d yo e tes
copy down to the essence and they shoul s
Why ts…becau hanged
they all say the same thing. “We n
stude and even
c
es
implement mission-critical choic
programs. We need money to
continue. Please give it to us now.”

4. +
How To Recognize
A Blah-Blah
If a piece blathers-on and on, uses coma-inducing phrases like,
“as I reflect on…” and is indistinguishable from any number of
similar pieces – it’s a blah-blah.

5. + Business Documents Have Always Suffered From Blah-Blah
ulary
ous vocab
pretenti
mble ..use
y to ra
..te ndenc
much data
in too
angled
..get t
James Yang
Bad communication habits Stanford Graduate School of Business
have reached such critical Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania
proportions, business
schools have been forced Simon Graduate School of Business at University of Rochester
to start teaching writing Northeastern University College of Business Administration
skills.
Information and graphic from Wall Street Journal article:
“Students Struggle for Words” by Diana Middleton
March 3, 2011

6. +
The Declarative Sentence Is A Lost Art
One of the most difficult student assignments in Northeastern’s
MBA program is to create a compelling sales story in less than
150 words, which is roughly four times the number of words on
this slide.

7. +
This Is Not A Heretical Premise:
Business sales pitches and nonprofit fundraising pitches
are not that different.
A donation and a purchase
are both business transactions.

8. +
What ‘transaction’
means to a business
definition:
The exchange of items of value, such as information, goods, or
services, and money.
reality:
People don’t buy products and services, they buy benefits and
solutions.

9. +
What ‘transaction’
means to a business
“People don’t buy a quarter-inch drill bit,
they buy a quarter-inch hole."
- Ted Levitt,
Harvard Business School Marketing Professor / Brilliant Thinker

10. +
What ‘transaction’
means to a nonprofit
definition:
the giving of a gift, or free contribution, especially to a charity or
public institution
reality:
People are paying for the emotional benefit of a specific and
personal act of good.

11. +
The most direct path to a donor’s wallet
is message-reduction
Donor Action: Buy a goat
Donor Benefit: Giving this family a
sustainable livelihood
Boil down the mission to its simplest, most personal component.

12. +
The most direct path to a donor’s wallet
is message-reduction
Donor Action: Send $10 via text
Donor Benefit: Help the victims of the
Haiti earthquake
Dead simple, instantly gratifying and takes cash, credit cards &
checks out of the equation.

13. +
The most direct path to a donor’s wallet
is message-reduction
Donor Action: Choose an item to fund
Donor Benefit: See who you helped
and learn about the
difference your gift made
Donor benefits organically integrated into every part of the organization.

14. +
4-Step Cure For
The Blah-Blahs
1. Find your story.
a) In one sentence, describe what your organization does.
b) Now describe the benefits of what your organization does.
c) Now rewrite that sentence in simple, conversational language.
This is the foundation of your story.

15. +
4-Step Cure For
The Blah-Blahs
2. Reduce your story.
a) Turn macro into micro.
b) Your story has 2 main characters, a donor and the end
beneficiary.
c) Write your story from the perspective of each of those
characters.

16. +
4-Step Cure For
The Blah-Blahs
3. Get right to the point.
a) The only people who read the entire appeal are you and your
assistant. Everyone else skims.
b) Leave the hardcore data at the door.
c) If you want them to read past the first line, get them at “hello”.

17. +
4-Step Cure For
The Blah-Blahs
4. You’re not selling the drill-bit, you’re selling the hole.
a) People get dozens of appeal letters and they all say the same
thing: “We need your money because….”
b) Turn the proposition around.
 “You’ll be a hero for just $15, which buys a 3 month supply of
vitamins to help this child survive.”
 “You’ll change the lives of an entire family with the $120
purchase of a goat.”

18. +
Follow-Up = Big Returns
 Pick up the phone
o Study showed: donors who got a thank you phone call from a board
member within 24 hours of receiving the gift gave 39% more the
next time they were solicited than donors who didn’t receive a call.
After 14 months, the calls were netting 42% more.*
 Discover motivation
o Find out why they chose to make a gift. Add the information to your
donor database and reference it to personalize your next solicitation
letter.
*Penelope Burk

19. +
Follow-Up = Big Returns
 Show their money at work
o Keep donors engaged with news about the people and programs
their donations targeted.
 Talk to lapsed donors
o Give them the opportunity to come in at a lower donation level.
o Keep them up-to-date on the benefits of your organization.
o Personalize & tailor your messaging to them for your next appeal.

20. +
Your Homework:
When you get back to your office, take a look at your last
fundraising appeal. If it’s more than one page, if you can win
buzzword bingo in the first paragraph, and if it says “we”
twice as much as it says “you,” take out the red pencil and
get rid of the blah-blahs.
Linda Ziskind / z2 Consulting
NTEN 2011
Ignite Presentation