4. At this point, I would like to ask you a rather intimate question,
but it would be fine if you could try and think about it openly
and answer it frankly.
Well...
6. If your answer was "yesâ, write a list of ten things you really fear.
Arrange them from the strongest in intensity to the weakest.
7. If you still claim you never fear anything, you can skip this chapter.
But you will definitely be asked to prove your words later.
When the time comes...
8. Now let's digress a little to another question.
What actually is fear?
And do we need it?
We usually have a very definite feeling that we could present much much better
without it, couldnât we?
9. Here you will need your list of fears that you were asked to make
in slide 6.
Things you fear most.
10. You can compare it with the results of a survey in which a team of market
researchers asked 3,000 respondents in the USA exactly the same question.
Many respondents named more than one fear, but it is interesting to think
about the results in the next slide.
Note: The numbers are given in percentage...
11. Speaking
before a
group
Heights
Financial problems
Deep water
Insects & Bugs
Death
Flying
Loneliness
Driving/riding Dogs
in a car
Darkness
Escalators
12. At this point it may be useful to have a closer look at fear. What exactly is it?
First of all, fear is a natural emotion.
We are born with some fears (for example the fear of falling, the fear of loud
noises) and we learn other fears early in life from the reactions of people around
us. The purpose of "natural fear" is very logical â to give us caution and help us to
keep our body alive.
To have fear is a defensive advantage. It protects us from danger and serves us as
motivation to escape to safety. We all need fear because it gets our adrenaline
going (remember the vital primaeval fight-or-flight reaction).
Too much fear, however, is counter productive and paralyzes us.
13. One way to deal with our fears is simply to work out what we are afraid of.
Ask yourself what it is exactly that you are worried about. Write it down, draw a
picture, make a song or a poem and try to understand the roots of your negative
attitude.
Also, attempt to do something practical about it. For example, if you are afraid of
spiders, buy a cuddly spider toy; if you are afraid of missing the morning bus, use
two friends (on the phone, of course) or two alarm clocks; if you are afraid of
freezing up during a presentation, improve your notes and rehearse more.
There are various successful supporting methods to fight against unnecessary
anxiety or dread, systems like limbic and mental programming, yoga, or Emotional
Freedom Techniques. Just look for them.
Of course, if your fear nears panic, it is advisable to see a psychologist.
15. The reason why we are afraid of public performance is manifold, but generally
it is because we do not like being exposed (remember Medieval punishment of
pillory for public humiliation or standing against the wall at school). An even deeper
reason is that we are afraid, no, we agonize of not being accepted.
These are for most of us lifelong frights, but we have learned to mask them very
well in normal life.
But as speakers, we are exposed in front of a crowd, plus we have to woo that
crowd (a hostile crowd, as we imagine) to get its attention and respect. What an
unenviable position!
It is also good to realize that stage fright and fear of public performance often have
their ground in our inner insecurity, fear of failure and thus anxiety of people. It is
also often accompanied by lack of self-trust and high suspiciousness towards other
people, which may have deep roots going back to our childhood.
16. Basically there are only two ways how to deal with it: you can choose to
give it up and suffer or to do something about it.
I have personally witnessed that practising public speaking helped people to
improve their personal qualities including more improved self-confidence and
ameliorated relationships.
17. Have you got any special ways how you deal with your fears and with the
anxiety of public performance?
You can compare them with our suggestions that follow.
19. Out-and-out preparation
Language practice
Tongue twisters
Breathing techniques
Building self-confidence in life
Positive expectation & visualization of success
Relaxation & meditation exercises
Mudras & acupressure points
A glass of water
Mind shift
Guarana
Having a nip
Out-and-out preparation
20. Now, I've got another question for you. This time a fighting one.
Have you ever thought that fear may be positive?
21. If you tend to protest, try to recall now the situations you have experienced
where a certain amount of fear has helped you in winning success...
Do not hurry and go through them in your mind trying to feel the emotions you felt,
how you dealt with them, and what was the feeling when it was successfully over.
22. If you have done that little exercise, you probably realized many important
and useful things:
1. Fear can be overcome.
2. Fear adds to our strength.
3. Fear sharpens our senses.
4. Fear focuses our mind.
5. Fear can be overcome.
23. Let me share a secret of a successful public performance:
Do not kill those butterflies in your stomach.
Rather learn to keep them under control.