3. “Jon, firstly let me congratulate you on
the most entertaining cold email that I
have received recently, or possibly
ever.”
4. “And I get a lot. It’s so rare to get a truly
creative communication from an agency
that purports to be creative, so thank
you.”
5. “I’m going to build a wall of fame for
examples of good marketing, on the
basis of your letter. It might be quite
small though, or perhaps just a few
tiles.”
6. “Let’s talk? We can probably use some
help with value propositions, or just our
general thinking. You don’t need to
wear the top hat, but if it helps, don’t let
us stop you.”
7. “Hi Jon. You have my attention, which
isn’t easy as I probably receive 40 or 50
of this type of email a week...”
8. “Let’s have a chat. I’m making no
promises (at this stage). I’m on holiday
for a month from Friday - so I guessed
25/1?”
9. “Hi Jon. Sarah forwarded me your email
- it was the ferret that did it ;-) It would
be great if you’d like to come and meet
us in person and talk to us a bit about
what you guys do, perhaps the morning
of Friday 15th?”
12. Greetings Susan,
You’ve never heard of me. (Hi, I’m Jon) I got
your details from a list *gasp*. But hey -
you’re list worthy, that’s gotta be something,
right? :-)
13. OK. Let’s get down to brass tacks. I’m
emailing you because I run a digital marketing
agency in Clapham, London, called Render
Positive with my brother, Gary, and a team of
10.
14. I used to work at large digital agencies with
big brand clients offering online marketing
services (SEO, PPC, Social Media, Analytics,
Content Creation and Bedroom Tidying).
15. For nearly 5 years, we’ve run our own agency
and we’re absolutely loving it. It’s so good to
not feel like we are ripping clients off, and we
are doing the best work of our lives.
16. We recently got an office in Clapham North
and I’m looking to win new clients over to our
side and away from those evil (ok maybe not
evil… but not as good) other agencies.
17. We have some big names on board - but
being the ambitious bunch we are, we won’t
settle for anything other than total
domination.
18. If you let me have a chat with you about your
digital marketing needs, I will buy you coffee /
lunch / tequila shots and promise to be
somewhat entertaining. If you’re lucky, I may
even wear a top hat.
19. First off, I’d love to provide you with some
ideas you are free to steal.
20. I have attached a picture of a ferret that has
been dressed up. According to the internet,
his name is Colin. I trust this will charm you
into submission.
21. I await your profanity filled response.
Have an absolutely wonderful day,
Jon Buchan
26. Greetings Susan,
You’ve never heard of me. (Hi, I’m Jon) I got
your details from a list *gasp*. But hey -
you’re list worthy, that’s gotta be something,
right? :-)
27. OK. Let’s get down to brass tacks. I’m
emailing you because I run a digital marketing
agency in Clapham, London, called Render
Positive with my brother, Gary, and a team of
10.
28. I used to work at large digital agencies with
big brand clients offering online marketing
services (SEO, PPC, Social Media, Analytics,
Content Creation and Bedroom Tidying).
29. For nearly 5 years, we’ve run our own agency
and we’re absolutely loving it. It’s so good to
not feel like we are ripping clients off, and we
are doing the best work of our lives.
30. We recently got an office in Clapham North
and I’m looking to win new clients over to our
side and away from those evil (ok maybe not
evil… but not as good) other agencies.
31. We have some big names on board but being
the ambitious bunch we are, we won’t settle
for anything other than total domination.
32. If you let me have a chat with you about your
digital marketing needs, I will buy you coffee /
lunch / tequila shots and promise to be
somewhat entertaining. If you’re lucky, I may
even wear a top hat.
33. First off, I’d love to provide you with some
ideas you are free to steal.
34. I have attached a picture of a ferret that has
been dressed up. According to the internet,
his name is Colin. I trust this will charm you
into submission.
35. I await your profanity-filled response.
Have an absolutely wonderful day,
Jon Buchan
39. “I recently cited you as an example of
someone who got my attention -- and
got me to publish something -- based
on a completely off the wall pitch.”
40. “In a conversation about PR & how to
pitch editors with some startup folks
here in SF.
Nobody pitches like you :)”
41. Dylan,
I'm in the office on a Saturday, so my
work-speak mode is off.
I'm going to cut straight to the chase -
no bullsh*t or pretence.
42. I have a rather useful graphic that
shows people how to create a Bring
Your Own Device policy. We found tons
of folks asking about this on LinkedIn
groups, so we created it. I found your
site - think its relevant and superb - and
wondered if you could take a look at it
43. and see if its something you'd publish.
We get: Kudos for getting our graphic
posted on an awesome site.
You get: A pretty good useful graphic
with our clients expert nerds thoughts
on it. It's quite nice looking too.
44. Our resident design expert, HB, did
them. Anyway, I'm sure you get
spammed all day with all such requests.
We'd love you to see them - and to see if
you like them.
45. I've attached a picture of a ferret that
has been dressed up. According to the
Internet, his name is Colin. I trust this
will charm you into submission.
46. I await your profanity filled response.
Regardless of your response, I hope
you have a wonderful day.
47.
48. For the rest of the exchange, head here:
charm-offensive.co.uk/brighton