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Welcome to
Asking
Better
Questions
Your Trainer:
Dawn Newton - Morello Training
Clients include:
▪ Mind
▪ Carers Network
▪ Sense
▪ Sightsavers
▪ St John Ambulance
2
Charity Meetup - Friendly
Networking and Skills Sharing Events
www.morellomarketing.com/charitymeetup
3
Session Outline
1. Why develop questioning skills
2. How to develop questioning
skills
3. Practicing questioning skills
Game
1.Find a person you have not met yet
2.Introduce yourselves (briefly)
3.Ask each other –
What did you discover about yourself
in the last 12 months?
1.Why develop your
questioning skills?
“The best leaders are the best note-takers,
best askers and best learners.”
- Tom Peters
5
6
Why are Questions Important?
1. Questions can open our
minds to new
possibilities or help
clarify solutions to
problems.
2. Questioning skills are
crucial to work well with
others and good leaders
ask great questions.
7
3. Being bold enough to ask a question in
a meeting can transform the
discussion, and change the mood for
the better.
4. Enhance interactions and meetings by
enhancing your repertoire of questions.
Stay curious!
“One of the fastest ways to
find the solution to an issue or
challenge you are facing is to
ask the right questions.
– Robin S. Sharma
8
[
Why develop our questioning skills?
▪ You only get answers to questions you ask.
▪ Questions unlock and open doors.
▪ Questions are the most effective means of
connecting with people.
▪ Questions cultivate humility.
9Source: Maxwell's book, "Good Leaders Ask Great Questions"
Skill is required to
ask the right
question in each
circumstance
Instruction vs Coaching
Would you rather:
▪ Be told how to do something or inspired to
find your own way?
▪ Work with a person who knows everything?
▪ Be a collaborator who questions, listens,
collaborates, coaches and serves?
12
Source:
https://learn.tearfund.org/en/resources/publications/footsteps/footsteps_81-
90/footsteps_84/bringing_out_the_best_in_people/
We are losing the ability to listen
“Most people do not
listen with the intent
to understand;
They listen with
the intent to reply”
- Steven Covey
Levels of Listening
Level 1
Internal Listening
Level 2
Active Listening
Level 3
360 Listening
Awareness
Inner dialogue, “me”, my feelings,
what I want to say, missing clues
Non judgemental, being present,
repeating, paraphrasing, reflecting,
use of silence, asking questions
Holding the space, using senses,
intuition, energy
“A leader's job is not to do the
work for others, it's to help
others figure out how to do it
themselves, to get things done,
and to succeed beyond what
they thought possible.”
- Simon Sinek
“The main premise of appreciative
inquiry is that positive questions,
focusing on strengths and assets,
tend to yield more effective results
than negative questions focusing on
problems or deficits.”
— Warren Berger
17
2. How to develop
questioning skills
18
19
Subconscious
Behaviour
20
“95% of your behaviour is driven by
your subconscious programming, which
means you function more in reaction
than conscious choice.
If you want to change your behaviour,
you must first become aware of your
subconscious drives. Then you know
when and how to practice choosing
something better.” - Kimberly Giles
Claritypoint Coaching Academy
Open and Closed Questions
Closed
A closed question can be answered
with either a single word or a short
phrase. (Often Yes/No)
How they are helpful:
▫ They give you facts.
▫ They are easy to answer.
▫ They are quick to answer.
▫ They keep control of the
conversation with the questioner.
Open
An open question is likely to receive a
long answer.
How they are helpful:
▫ They ask the respondent to think
and reflect.
▫ They will give you opinions and
feelings.
▫ They hand control of the
conversation to the respondent
21
22
What questions are the least
threatening as they seek
understanding about behaviour
and the environment.
Examples to try:
▫ What were the circumstances?
▫ What did you think?
▫ What can we do about it??
Experimenting with Open Questions
What?
How?
23
How questions are slightly more
threatening as they seek
understanding about actions and
capabilities
Examples to try:
▫ How did it happen?
▫ How does this work?
▫ How was the meeting?
Experimenting with Open Questions
Why?
24
Care must be taken with the use of Why?
questions as they seek to understand a
person’s values and start to pry at their
identity.
Examples to try:
▫ Why did you do it??
If you ask this as the first question it is likely to provoke a
negative / defensive response.
▫ Why are you (so) late / early?
▫ Why did you not come for lunch?
Experimenting with Open Questions
““GET TOUGH. Mental and spiritual
toughness go together. Deepen your
commitment to your most essential
values and mentally rehearse the
specific ways you can take positive
action.” - Gary Chapman
25
Clarifying
questions
Q. Tell me more about x …
Very useful question for many different situations
Q. How should our success be
measured?
Q. If you could do it over again,
what would you do differently?
Q. What are we missing? What have
we not considered?
26
Experimenting with
Questions
Let’s start to make the questions our own
27
Question pass the parcel:
• One person presents a problem
• First person asks an open question
• Second person asks a different question
Avoid
using
WHY
Try at a future meeting:
Oprah Winfrey starts every meetings by asking:
“What is our intention for this meeting?
What’s important?
What matters?”
28
6
29
Breaking
Free of
Blocks
Resistance to new
initiatives
Q. What will be
the benefits of
change?
Opposing views
Q. I hear your
views, can I have
the opportunity to
share my differing
point of view?
If you get stuck in
a negative loop
Q. What is
possible?
30
Stuck on an
obstacle
Q. How would the
following day look
like (without this
problem)?
2. Practicing
questioning skills
31
Socrates’ way of examining people was using the
Socratic method. He believed that this made people
more aware of their ignorance and therefore, leads
to humility and modesty.
32
“I define connection as the energy that
exists between people when they feel
seen, heard, and valued; when they
can give and receive without
judgment; and when they derive
sustenance and strength from the
relationship. – Brené Brown
33
Mastermind
Group
Principles
Bids to raise problem
Uninterupted sharing
Group agrees agenda
34
No
Judgement
Principles
35
▪ People have their own solutions within
themselves
▪ If someone is given access to the
resources they need, they will make
better choices
▪ Individual and organisational success
benefits from behavioural flexibility.
37
Mini Mastermind
• Share live issues & one chosen
• Briefly describe issue
• Define what help you would like
• The group asks questions
• Some solutions can be offered at the end
38
Reflection
39
▪ What resonated with you?
▪ What surprised you?
▪ What will you try out?
▪ What worked well?
▪ What was challenging?
Change Within
40
▪ Ongoing support programme
▪ Mastermind / Action Learning Sets
▪ Themed groups of 6 – 10 people meet monthly
“I was genuinely surprised at how it allowed me to view my issues
from a completely different perspective. It was a magical,
serendipitous moment where I experienced what it was like to think
outside myself by utilising what was already within.” - Paul
41
https://dribbble.com/shots/3548319-Wonder-Woman#shot-description
Be Bold! Good Luck!
Thanks!
Any questions?
Dawn@morellotraining.co.uk
42
@goreckidawn
Dawn.Newton
43
Getting ahead in your
comms career
20 June 2019
London
#CommsCareer
Visit the CharityComms website to view
slides from past events, see what events
we have coming up and to check out
what else we do:
www.charitycomms.org.uk

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Asking better questions

  • 2. Your Trainer: Dawn Newton - Morello Training Clients include: ▪ Mind ▪ Carers Network ▪ Sense ▪ Sightsavers ▪ St John Ambulance 2 Charity Meetup - Friendly Networking and Skills Sharing Events www.morellomarketing.com/charitymeetup
  • 3. 3 Session Outline 1. Why develop questioning skills 2. How to develop questioning skills 3. Practicing questioning skills
  • 4. Game 1.Find a person you have not met yet 2.Introduce yourselves (briefly) 3.Ask each other – What did you discover about yourself in the last 12 months?
  • 5. 1.Why develop your questioning skills? “The best leaders are the best note-takers, best askers and best learners.” - Tom Peters 5
  • 6. 6 Why are Questions Important? 1. Questions can open our minds to new possibilities or help clarify solutions to problems. 2. Questioning skills are crucial to work well with others and good leaders ask great questions.
  • 7. 7 3. Being bold enough to ask a question in a meeting can transform the discussion, and change the mood for the better. 4. Enhance interactions and meetings by enhancing your repertoire of questions. Stay curious!
  • 8. “One of the fastest ways to find the solution to an issue or challenge you are facing is to ask the right questions. – Robin S. Sharma 8 [
  • 9. Why develop our questioning skills? ▪ You only get answers to questions you ask. ▪ Questions unlock and open doors. ▪ Questions are the most effective means of connecting with people. ▪ Questions cultivate humility. 9Source: Maxwell's book, "Good Leaders Ask Great Questions"
  • 10. Skill is required to ask the right question in each circumstance
  • 11. Instruction vs Coaching Would you rather: ▪ Be told how to do something or inspired to find your own way? ▪ Work with a person who knows everything? ▪ Be a collaborator who questions, listens, collaborates, coaches and serves?
  • 13. We are losing the ability to listen
  • 14. “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; They listen with the intent to reply” - Steven Covey
  • 15. Levels of Listening Level 1 Internal Listening Level 2 Active Listening Level 3 360 Listening Awareness Inner dialogue, “me”, my feelings, what I want to say, missing clues Non judgemental, being present, repeating, paraphrasing, reflecting, use of silence, asking questions Holding the space, using senses, intuition, energy
  • 16. “A leader's job is not to do the work for others, it's to help others figure out how to do it themselves, to get things done, and to succeed beyond what they thought possible.” - Simon Sinek
  • 17. “The main premise of appreciative inquiry is that positive questions, focusing on strengths and assets, tend to yield more effective results than negative questions focusing on problems or deficits.” — Warren Berger 17
  • 18. 2. How to develop questioning skills 18
  • 19. 19
  • 20. Subconscious Behaviour 20 “95% of your behaviour is driven by your subconscious programming, which means you function more in reaction than conscious choice. If you want to change your behaviour, you must first become aware of your subconscious drives. Then you know when and how to practice choosing something better.” - Kimberly Giles Claritypoint Coaching Academy
  • 21. Open and Closed Questions Closed A closed question can be answered with either a single word or a short phrase. (Often Yes/No) How they are helpful: ▫ They give you facts. ▫ They are easy to answer. ▫ They are quick to answer. ▫ They keep control of the conversation with the questioner. Open An open question is likely to receive a long answer. How they are helpful: ▫ They ask the respondent to think and reflect. ▫ They will give you opinions and feelings. ▫ They hand control of the conversation to the respondent 21
  • 22. 22 What questions are the least threatening as they seek understanding about behaviour and the environment. Examples to try: ▫ What were the circumstances? ▫ What did you think? ▫ What can we do about it?? Experimenting with Open Questions What?
  • 23. How? 23 How questions are slightly more threatening as they seek understanding about actions and capabilities Examples to try: ▫ How did it happen? ▫ How does this work? ▫ How was the meeting? Experimenting with Open Questions
  • 24. Why? 24 Care must be taken with the use of Why? questions as they seek to understand a person’s values and start to pry at their identity. Examples to try: ▫ Why did you do it?? If you ask this as the first question it is likely to provoke a negative / defensive response. ▫ Why are you (so) late / early? ▫ Why did you not come for lunch? Experimenting with Open Questions
  • 25. ““GET TOUGH. Mental and spiritual toughness go together. Deepen your commitment to your most essential values and mentally rehearse the specific ways you can take positive action.” - Gary Chapman 25
  • 26. Clarifying questions Q. Tell me more about x … Very useful question for many different situations Q. How should our success be measured? Q. If you could do it over again, what would you do differently? Q. What are we missing? What have we not considered? 26
  • 27. Experimenting with Questions Let’s start to make the questions our own 27 Question pass the parcel: • One person presents a problem • First person asks an open question • Second person asks a different question Avoid using WHY
  • 28. Try at a future meeting: Oprah Winfrey starts every meetings by asking: “What is our intention for this meeting? What’s important? What matters?” 28 6
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  • 30. Breaking Free of Blocks Resistance to new initiatives Q. What will be the benefits of change? Opposing views Q. I hear your views, can I have the opportunity to share my differing point of view? If you get stuck in a negative loop Q. What is possible? 30 Stuck on an obstacle Q. How would the following day look like (without this problem)?
  • 31. 2. Practicing questioning skills 31 Socrates’ way of examining people was using the Socratic method. He believed that this made people more aware of their ignorance and therefore, leads to humility and modesty.
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  • 33. “I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship. – Brené Brown 33
  • 34. Mastermind Group Principles Bids to raise problem Uninterupted sharing Group agrees agenda 34 No Judgement
  • 35. Principles 35 ▪ People have their own solutions within themselves ▪ If someone is given access to the resources they need, they will make better choices ▪ Individual and organisational success benefits from behavioural flexibility.
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  • 38. Mini Mastermind • Share live issues & one chosen • Briefly describe issue • Define what help you would like • The group asks questions • Some solutions can be offered at the end 38
  • 39. Reflection 39 ▪ What resonated with you? ▪ What surprised you? ▪ What will you try out? ▪ What worked well? ▪ What was challenging?
  • 40. Change Within 40 ▪ Ongoing support programme ▪ Mastermind / Action Learning Sets ▪ Themed groups of 6 – 10 people meet monthly “I was genuinely surprised at how it allowed me to view my issues from a completely different perspective. It was a magical, serendipitous moment where I experienced what it was like to think outside myself by utilising what was already within.” - Paul
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  • 44. Getting ahead in your comms career 20 June 2019 London #CommsCareer
  • 45. Visit the CharityComms website to view slides from past events, see what events we have coming up and to check out what else we do: www.charitycomms.org.uk