Positive Relationships 16.04.15

1. POSITIVE RELATIONSHIPS
WITH ADULTS AND CARERS
AND THE WIDER
COMMUNITY.
LISA GRAY
16.04.15

2. 20 minute reflection time on
previous training session to
discuss strategies used, what
went well and next steps .

3. Objectives :
• Acknowledge relationships with all stakeholders
and the wider community
• Develop a range of approaches to communicate
effectivectively with all stakeholders.
• To Understand parents/carers perceptions of
school life .
• To consider implications for your own practice

4. Wind Park Community Primary School is situated on the outskirts of one of our major
cities in the North of England. Once deemed by Ofsted to be a ‘failing school’ and
described in the local evening newspaper as ‘a school that is letting down the
community,’ it is now a thriving environment that all members of the school community
are proud of. Of course this did not happen overnight, as the head teacher described:
It’s been a real struggle, but a struggle that has been worth it. It has involved all of the
community working together, and that is the reason why we have succeeded.
The level of this success cannot be underestimated given the challenges that the school
had to face. On my journey to the school I noticed that many of the local buildings were
covered in graffiti, with rolling barbed wire on the edges of the rooftops to deter intruders.
Interestingly, as I entered through the school gates, such things were not evident. A large
red sign greeted me with the words ‘working together for success’. My second greeting
was from a group of young boys, about eight years of age, ‘Have you come to have a
look at our school mister?’ Since coming out of special measures I was to learn that the
school was subject to many visits from a range of people interested in their success. My
final greeting, as I entered the school building came from a group of parents who had
gathered at reception. Noticing my nervousness one of them called out, ‘First day is it?
Don’t worry, he’s not a bad lad, our Mr Fellows – he won’t bite.’
THINK PIECE
15 MINS
Wind Park Community Primary School
Activity 1
Whole group

5. Seemingly on cue Mr Fellows, head teacher, turned a corner and came to greet me.
Sharing a joke with the parents, he was immediately surrounded by children all
clamouring for his attention. Very skilfully he seemed to acknowledge each and every
one of them as he led me into his office.
Over coffee he began to reflect on the journey the school had made. He described the
background of the school it serves a community with high levels of unemployment and
social deprivation, 72 per cent of the 210 children on roll entitled to free school meals.
Three years ago standards of attainment, as measured by achievement of level 4 at
Key Stage 2 tests were less than 30 per cent in literacy, maths and science; they are
now all above 70 per cent.
He was adamant that this success was down to many things, but he saw the
involvement of the community as the most significant factor. Recalling the situation
when he arrived at the school he comments:
The kids were aggressive and so were the parents. Fights were the norm and sadly
this sometimes involved parents. There were low aspirations and people just seemed
lost. I was very worried as to whether I would be up to the job, but I was clear about
one thing, that we had to build our school through the community.
He described how he began appointing teaching assistants and welfare staff who
lived in the local area.
I wanted to break down the barriers and build human relationships between the staff
and the families of the children.

6. Similarly, he recognised the need to establish local partnership. Given the profile of the
school he targeted the local press and many school events were regularly featured. He set up
a programme of activities that involved the local community police officer; the school nurse
was a regular visitor too, as were representatives from the local, high profile, football team.
He spoke with great pride as to how these groups were actively involved in the learning of the
children, but he was particularly proud about the way the parents were now involved:
At first it was a nightmare, every encounter seemed to be aggressive, but it’s different now.
We have family nights, school discos and even bingo!
The head was eager to take me to a coffee morning that was going on in the school hall. The
parents organised it for themselves and as we entered it was the same friendly tone that we
experienced at the start of the day. A number of the parents were to stay on afterwards, and
as we walked the corridors we saw parents working with the children, listening to them read
and baking with them. Another group were reorganising the library; people were happy to be
there and it seemed to matter.
I commented to the head that it was difficult to tell who the teachers were and who the
parents were. His response was: ‘I involve people; it is only by people working together that
we can succeed.’ It seemed that such a view was echoed by all staff members. One of the
learning mentors I met commented: ‘We’re all involved in everything.’ What I was to learn was
that being involved meant having the opportunity, but also the responsibility to contribute.
Caroline’s involvement was to be responsible for pastoral support, a job she loved:

7. I just love it, I am allowed to take the lead, make decisions without having to check every
little issue with the senior leadership team. For example, at one point we had a major
problem at lunchtimes. I made the decision to appoint a number of parents as lunchtime
supervisors, at first they simply watched the children fight, and even worse, and if it
involved their own child they sometimes took sides. At first I looked to the head teacher for
the solution and was surprised when he said that I should sort it out, I know why he did it
now.
Behaviour was an issue that the school took very seriously, as Caroline described: ‘It is
the first step in learning.’ Being in the school I was very aware of a range of procedures that
were intended to develop consistency. For example, the ‘Golden Book’ that celebrated
good behaviour, the ‘Golden Way’ — directions such as ‘we will care for each other and be
friends’ and the ‘Golden Rules’ – ‘we will not be unkind’. Whilst impressive, these signposts
simply reflected the individual and collective responsibility that was part of the daily
experience of all involved at Wind Park. One Year 4 child, Jamie, summed this up:
‘When you feel you are getting angry you just have to press the panic button’.
I looked for evidence of an internal alarm system that would bring forth a team of experts
to come and rescue Jamie. Then he showed me the panic button in the centre of his hand
and he explained that when he pressed it he could control his own behaviour.
At the age of eight Jamie understood that he had to be responsible for his own
behaviour. Of course the school did have a team of experts that worked effectively to help
those children in greatest need, but self-responsibility and commitment to the school
community was the starting point.

8. The children were committed to the community because the community was committed
to them. This was wonderfully exemplified at the end of the school day. I say the end of
the school day but what I mean is at 3.30 p.m. a whole range of community activities
get underway. Children take part in a range of sporting activities provided from
agencies beyond the school gate. A computer and art club run by staff members adds
to the range. To complement this, a group of parents run a family crèche for the nursery
and very young children. Another group of parents are engaged in a computer course
run by one of the teaching assistants. This is the third year that the course, which is
sponsored by the local university, has been running.
As I gathered up my things to leave Wind Park Community Primary School I reflected
back on a day which convinced me, that if we want our children to succeed it is best
and probably can only be achieved in community.

9. What is the main message here?
What implications does this have
for your setting ?
Select one key quote from the
text and write it on a post it note

10. Two perspectives on successful partnerships
Is there a place for parents in schools?
Yes
by Clare Griffiths, Head teacher, Parkview Primary School, Derby
Parental involvement in schools works. Parents have been central to Parkview since we opened
six years ago, helping us achieve our aim of being ‘the best we can be’.
The governing body includes many parents. The way we have developed our leadership together
means there is now real trust in how we meet, draw up and implement our school development
plan. Our purpose is to provide optimum conditions for learning and these adults bring
experiences and opportunities. Parent governors attend student school council and include
council representatives at the annual meeting with parents. They recruit, attend staff meetings
and Inset and are Investors' in People. They bring building and finance expertise to develop our
outdoor classroom and strategy to extend provision. Members of faith communities and police
lead assemblies, RE and PHSE sessions, and run out-of-school clubs ranging from recorders to
prize-winning gardening. Parents are leaders in our many open sessions, constantly evaluating
how we are doing through conversations and questionnaires.
The Parents' and Friends' Association (PFA) socialises and fundraises effectively and
imaginatively. Our PFA provides enrichment for learning that goes well beyond the additional
resources provided. Meetings with the group and individuals are vehicles for developing dialogue
about learning. Our IT coordinator made a presentation to parents about potential improvements
in technology and methodology; parental knowledge and skills, as well as fundraising, achieved
more joined up understanding and provision. These parents are ambassadors, linking with other
PFAs and businesses, and sounding boards for how we could improve together.
Activity 2
Split into 2 Groups
15 mins

11. We have more parent helpers than teachers, enhancing our capacity to
individualise learning, make visits, play sports, run crèches and clubs, and bring
in the world of other work. Librarian parents train us, and others run
community classes. We develop helpers and organise adult education classes for
parents. Parents gain work experience, qualifications and sometimes
employment with us. They are part of what we do as well as a proud and
celebratory audience. Parents have brought in first-hand information to areas
such as Geography and History. They accelerated the development of music
through bringing their own bands into school to play with the children in our
concerts as well as converting the caretaker's space into a music room.
Ours is an open school. We hold special events, responding to parental requests
as well as linking sessions with the school improvement plan, which they help
to develop. Policies and initiatives are developed with parents, increasing
energy, impact and sustainability. We have created valuable new knowledge
about our children, learning and the community.
We began cautiously and sometimes got it wrong. Not all parents are able or
keen to be highly involved; some parents  and staff  disagree at times. But
we see children's happiness at having parents in school, helping us to achieve
another of our aims  having fun learning together  and we plan to have more
of this.

12. No
by Paul Strong, Head teacher, William Farr CE School, Lincolnshire
I went to my GP who is 30; he went to college and achieved good qualifications. He examined me and said there
was nothing wrong. However, I have been ill and therefore am an expert on medicine. I questioned his conclusion. I
knew I was unwell and said so. He replied 'I am right, you are wrong, I resent your attitude, go and find another
GP.'
Fantasy? In a medical world. Of course not.
For if a doctor says you have chicken pox it is non-negotiable and you cannot bargain for measles or mumps. You
would not dare disagree.
At a recent parents’ evening, a geography teacher, also 30, said that there were no concerns about a child.
However, the parents disagreed and since they have been to school, this qualifies them as experts on education.
To which my member of staff replied, 'Well, that is my professional opinion. If you do not like it, go and find another
school!'
Fantasy? In an educational world. Of course.
The parents then wanted to see the head teacher or chair of governors. Despite the teacher's view, they knew
better. The school had not recognised their child was under-functioning; she was 'special needs' and had a
'syndrome'.
Given increasing expectations by politicians of 'parent power' and 'rights' (but not 'responsibilities') parents feel
more empowered to disagree with the professional decisions of teachers, taking up time more efficiently employed
in the classroom. We are encouraged to recognise a parent/school 'equal partnership'. Impossible. Children are in
school for about eight hours a day yet with parents for one hour in the morning and three or four after school. That
is, if they are not told 'your dinner is in the oven' or 'why don't you use your Play Station, iPod, Internet, plasma
TV?' I therefore contend that, realistically, teachers and educators know more about individual children than any
parent. And it is about time they realised this.

13. One has to wonder why many parents bother having children. They send them to
school ill, cannot collect them because 'it is inconvenient', expect the school to
provide transport if they 'miss the bus' or feel affronted when challenged about
failure to check homework. I have been a head for 20 years. Like many other
schools, my staff work very hard. Our school is outstandingly successful in 'whole
child' education. We are oversubscribed, housing 30 per cent more pupils than
neighbouring schools. Appeals are a weekly event. You would think parents would
be grateful for such a positive and caring environment. Yet they think we are at
their beck and call and our motives and work constantly subjected to questioning
and ill-informed comment.
As parents increasingly abdicate responsibility for bringing up their children, it falls
upon schools to provide a substitute. Many pupils come to school lacking the basic
values of compassion, civility, humility, decency, mutual respect, orderly thought
and behaviour. It is only in school that such basic principles are inculcated,
principles so often undermined by completely different attitudes at home.
Parents, who needs them? One thing is certain, schools and teachers certainly do
not. Parents should cease their interference and do what they are good at:
fundraising and ferrying their children to sports matches and school events. Where
education is concerned, they should leave it to the professionals.

14. Activity 3
Diamond 9
2 groups
15 mins

15. The diamond nine statements
 Parental partnership is essential for realising each child’s potential –children,
parents and staff all have equally important, if different, roles
• All parents want what is best for their child
• The parent is the expert on their own child
• We recognise that many of our parents live under highly stressful conditions
which affect their capacity to parent as we may think appropriate – we recognise
that they are doing their best within the context of their individual situations
• We understand that we may have to work harder (and differently) to earn trust
and credibility with some parents because of their previous life-chances and
negative experiences with authority and the education system
• We need to adopt creative and flexible strategies and policies to meet a variety
of parental needs
• We accept that we will sometimes have different perspectives, expectations and
beliefs which result from different life-experiences, culture and contexts but
strive for mutual understanding
• We take a solution-focused approach to problem-solving and do not judge or
blame
• We aim for every interaction with parents to result in them feeling ‘heard’ and
valued, and be a step on the way to empowerment

16. Activity 4
Think /Pair /Share
10mins

17. From the list created previously
discuss ways we can involve all these people
to create a positive learning climate and
build social capital for all our stakeholders
Nominate a scribe and a person from your
group to feedback to the rest of the group .
Activity 5
2 Groups
20 mins
Vision Exercise

18. Points to consider:
• Do we treat everyone equally?
• Who are the most important people ?
• Are we investing in our relationships , if so
how and how often are we topping up this
investment ?
• Do our school policies reflect and enhance
positive relationships between all
stakeholders?
• Do all staff invest in building positive
relationships ?
• How do we communicate that everyone is a
valuable member of the school community?

19. Activity 6
Small Group
15mins .
Think of a personal
experience where you were
Confronted by a really upset
parent unable to control
their emotions .
What could you have done
differently ?
How did you deal
with this ?
How did it make
you feel ?

20. lisagray@wcpsandrscc.co.ukLisa Gray BA Hons ChYth Stud
Specialist Leader of Education
Worsbrough Common Primary School
lisagray@wcpsandrscc.co.uk