1. I'LL DRINK TO THAT
Written by
Adam Glennon
Television Drama
127 Windermere Road
Stockport
adam.glennon@yahoo.com
07835404857

2. OPENING SCENE
INT. SOCIAL CLUB MANCHESTER. NIGHT
The room’s buzzing with activity. There’s a hungry group of
middle aged men gorging on the buffet at the back of the
room, holding over-filled paper plates and pints of ale. The
queue for the bar’s three people deep and staff rush around
collecting glasses and serving drinks. The tables are
occupied with drunken couples singing along to the ELVIS
impersonator on the stage.
ELVIS
Thank you, thank you very much.
EILEEN DAVIES, a petite lady of indeterminate age (touching
sixty), dressed immaculately and over-heavy on the make-up,
is sitting with her latest, pot bellied, slightly younger
squeeze JOHN.
ELVIS (CONT’D)
(singing)
Wise men say, only fouls rush in.
The crowd join Elvis in singing the lyrics. Eileen smiles at
JOHN pats him lovingly on the leg. She removes a cigarette
from a leather pouch and lights it.
JOHN
You’ve done it again love.
EILEEN
What?
John points at the cig.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
Oh, I don’t think I’ll ever get use
to this.
She stubs the cig out on the table leg and slides it back
into the pouch.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
Better nip outside for a smoke then
handsome, back in a mo’.
JOHN passes Eileen some money.
JOHN
Grab a couple of brandies on your
way back.
EILEEN
No problem.

3. She kisses him deeply and slips the cash into her bra while
standing. John looks around a little embarrassed at such a
public display of affection. She steps away from the table.
JOHN
Pork Scratchings as well.
With a wink she glides through the busy tables, like a bride
at her wedding, towards the exit at the back. She greets
several people who return her warmth.
EXT. SMOKING AREA. MOMENTS LATER
Eileen’s chatting to DEB, a tired looking but attractive
woman in her early forties with bleached blonde hair and
bright red lipstick.
DEB
So, how’s it going with Fat John?
EILEEN
He’s not fat.
DEB
Really?
EILEEN
He’s big boned.
They share the silence, both with raised eyebrows and cigs in
mouths.
DEB
If that’s what they’re calling it
nowadays, who am I to judge?
EILEEN
Exactly.
DEB
Because, you know what we called
big boned people when I was young?
EILEEN
No. But I’d love to know.
DEB
Fat fuckers Eileen, we called ‘em
fat fuckers.
They laugh out loud. Fellow smokers turn to see what’s so
amusing then continue with their own conversations. After
regaining their composure, swigging from wine glasses and
dragging on cigs they continue.
2.

4. EILEEN
So, to answer your question babe,
we’re doing fine. He pays the bills
and I look fabulous. Nothing to it.
DEB
How about the . . . you know?
EILEEN
Haven’t the foggiest.
DEB
The sex Eileen, has the fat man got
any moves?
EILEEN
A lady never divulges such
information, you should know
better?
Deb smokes and nods in acknowledgement.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
But I can tell you this, what he
lacks in moves, he makes up in...
Eileen holds her hands about a foot apart and parallel.
DEB
Bloody hell. Who’d ‘ave thought.
Fat John’s got a big...
JOHN (O.S.)
(interrupts)
What you two talking about?
EILEEN
Oh nothing. Just telling Deb about
your new telly.
JOHN
Ar yes, it’s a belter. I can watch
the footy and ‘ave a drink at home
now.
EILEEN
That’s right. And while he watches
the game, I’ll open his beers and
serve h’orderves on a tray.
Unlikely mister.
JOHN
What the ek is an h’orderve?
The women exchange a quick glance.
3.

5. DEB
How’s your sister doin’ John? Not
seen her for ages.
JOHN
She’s fine. To posh to come round
here nowadays.
EILEEN
Thank god for small mercies.
DEB
‘Av’ I missed somethin’?
EILEEN
She hates me.
JOHN
No she doesn’t.
EILEEN
(to Deb)
She hates me and I’m not overly
fond of her either.
JOHN
You’ve not had time to get to know
one ‘nother yet.
John puts an arm around Eileen’s shoulder.
JOHN (CONT’D)
And in a couple of weeks you’ll get
the chance at our Jenny’s weddin’.
DEB
Who’s Jenny?
JOHN
Cousin.
DEB
Talkin’ of wedding’s, when you
gonna make a honest woman out of
this one John?
Eileen’s eyes widen. She’s mortified! John removes his arm
from Eileen’s shoulder and steps away slightly.
JOHN
I only came outside to see where ma
Pork Scratchings are.
EILEEN
I’ve not been to the bar yet, I’ll
be in, in a few.
4.

6. JOHN
Give uz the money and I’ll go. Be
waiting all year for you two to
stop gabbing.
Eileen removes cash from her bra and passes it to John who
leaves immediately, burping and rubbing his belly.
EILEEN
What you doing Deb? I nearly had a
stroke.
DEB
Never seen you squirm before. Was
it the mention of marriage in
general or the thought of marrying
fat John?
EILEEN
I like things the way they are.
Dodged that bullet once.
DEB
When?
EILEEN
It’s a long boring story hun. Not
one I’d like to discuss tonight.
DEB
You’re a woman of mystery.
EILEEN
And long may that continue.
DEB
Come to think of it, I don’t know
much. Where’d you live before?
EILEEN
All over. Not one for settling
down, so don’t mention marriage
again please.
DEB
These lips are sealed.
EILEEN
Thank you. Now, you coming in?
Elvis is still in the building.
Both cigarettes are disposed of and the two women walk back
inside linking arms.
5.

7. EXT. STREET. LATER
The street’s quiet except for Eileen and John. John’s swaying
slightly while munching on a tray of pie and chips. Eileen’s
smoking as they walk.
JOHN
Was pretty good that Elvis wa’nt
he?
EILEEN
He was. Never a big fan of the King
but he was on top form tonight.
JOHN
You don’t like the King?
EILEEN
He didn’t write his own songs.
Three HOODED YOUTHS appear from around the corner drinking
from bottles of beer.
HOODED YOUTH
Give us a cig.
EILEEN
That’s not a polite way to ask.
HOODED YOUTH 2
Give us a cig please.
EILEEN
That’s better.
HOODED YOUTH 3
You old bitch!
JOHN
You little shit.
HOODED YOUTH 3 smashes the tray of food out of John’s hand,
hitting Eileen in the process. Eileen quickly gets her cig
pouch from her bag and throws it on the floor.
EILEEN
Bloody take them.
Drunken Youth 2 picks them up.
DRUNKEN YOUTH 2
What’s this shit?
He removes the cig packet and throws the pouch on the floor.
JOHN
Oy, give ‘em back.
6.

8. EILEEN
Leave it John, let em’ have ‘em.
JOHN
I’ll let ‘em have it alright!
John reaches out for one of them but loses his footing and
trips over, landing heavily on the pavement. The youths walk
away laughing. Eileen leans down to help John up.
EILEEN
You silly sod. It was only a
packets of cigs. I’ve got plenty.
JOHN
I know, but...
Eileen’s almost pulled down with John as he falls back to the
ground.
EILEEN
What is it?
JOHN
I don’t know.
John struggles to breathe.
EILEEN
Are you okay? John.
He clutches his arm in agony and rolls onto his back. Eileen
kneels and holds his head in her hands. His eyes move rapidly
from side to side as he tries to speak.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
(shouting)
John, John. Help, somebody help,
please . . . HELP!
A window opens in one of the houses close by.
ANGRY MAN (O.S.)
Will you shut the fuck up. I’ve got
work in the mornin’.
He closes the window.
EXT. HOSPITAL WARD. NIGHT
A doctor’s talking to Eileen but she isn’t listening. He
hands over a plastic bag and rubs her shoulder before walking
away. In a daze, Eileen heads along a corridor and sits down
in the waiting area. A woman’s sleeping upright in a chair
with a small boy on her knee. The boy smiles at Eileen and
she forces a smile in return.
7.

9. EXT. HOSPITAL ENTRANCE. NIGHT
Eileen’s smoking a cig under the illuminated hospital sign. A
car pulls up and Deb exits the passenger side and immediately
embraces Eileen.
INT. JOHN’S HOUSE. DAY
Eileen and Deb enter the front door into the hallway. Eileen
looks into the mirror and notices the black makeup smudged
around her eyes. Deb waves to the driver in the car then
closes the door.
EILEEN
You could have warned me.
Pointing to her black eyes.
DEB
What? You look like that every
Sunday mornin’.
The friends laugh softly. Eileen hesitates before entering
the living room where John’s big screen television is still
boxed and sat in the centre of the room. Eileen walks over,
gently kicks it then sits on top of it.
EILEEN
John didn’t want to go out last
night.
She removes a hipflask from her bag, unscrews it, takes a
gulp then offers it to Deb who accepts.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
He wanted to stay in, fix this
monstrosity to the wall and watch
Match of the bloody Day.
DEB
It wa’nt your fault. Don’t think
like that.
Eileen walks over to a shelf and picks up a lighter. Her hand
shakes as she lights a cig.
EILEEN
You know what makes it even worse?
DEB
What?
Deb drinks from the hipflask then passes it back to Eileen.
EILEEN
I fucking hate Elvis.
8.

10. INT. SARAH’S COTTAGE. MORNING
The living room’s trashed. Pictures have been ripped off the
walls and ornaments smashed. The coffee table’s upside down,
plates, glasses, everything is everywhere and certainly not
in the correct place. Thirty five year old SARAH, is wearing
her wedding dress and sprawled half on, half off the sofa.
Her head’s on the floor under a cushion. She’s snoring
loudly.
A soft knock at the front door causes her to stir a little.
She continues to snore blissfully. The knocks turn to thuds
and this time she wakes.
SARAH
Go away.
Her legs drop to the floor and she rolls onto her knees. She
pushes her face deep into a cushion.
BENNY (O.S.)
Open the door.
She throws the cushion to one side and forces herself to
stand. She’s seriously hung over and unsteady on her feet.
She surveys the mess and looks down at her wedding dress.
SARAH
Shit.
BENNY (O.S.)
You’ve got ten seconds then I’ll
presume it’s an attempted suicide
and kick the door down. One... Two.
SARAH
Keep your bloody hair on! What’s
left of it.
BENNY (O.S.)
I heard that.
The tight wedding dress means she must shuffle towards the
hallway.
BENNY (CONT’D)
Eight, nine!
SARAH
Okay, okay.
She opens the front door and BENNY’s standing there. Looking
fresh faced, fit as a fiddle for his fifty years, as black a
man you’ll ever see and not best pleased to be there at this
time in the morning.
SARAH (CONT’D)
Hello Benjamin.
9.

11. BENNY
You know I hate that.
SARAH
I know.
BENNY
I see you’re wearing your wedding
dress again.
SARAH
Quite astute aren’t you. They must
have been devastated when you left
the force.
BENNY
They were actually. Not good for
stats when a black officer suffers
a nervous breakdown. Especially a
gay one.
SARAH
You ticked all the boxes.
BENNY
Yes I did.
He looks her up and down.
SARAH
What?
BENNY
Getting a little snug in there
wouldn’t you say?
She adjusts her boobs but stands defiant.
SARAH
I’ll admit to gaining a few extra
pounds over the last ten years but
it still fits.
BENNY
You look like an elephant wrapped
in a net curtain.
He barges past her unconcerned.
SARAH
Twat.
10.

12. LIVING ROOM. CONTINUOUS
Benny surveys the carnage.
SARAH (O.S.)
Fancy a brew? I’ve got some custard
creams somewhere. If I didn’t eat
them all last night.
Sarah’s wedding pictures are scattered all over the floor.
Benny picks up a handful. He’s in several, smiling and
standing with Sarah and her ex, ANDREW. Sarah appears at the
arch between rooms eating a biscuit.
SARAH (CONT’D)
There’s no custard creams but I
found some digestives.
BENNY
This is depressing. You’re
depressing.
He points at her and throws the pictures back on the floor.
SARAH
Nobody invited you here.
BENNY
Really?
He strides across the room towards her holding his phone out.
Sarah stops chewing the biscuit.
BENNY (CONT’D)
22:40, three text messages of light
hearted waffle. 23:46, the first
missed call, 11:52, 12:08, 12:43,
text messages, voice mails, shall I
continue?
They stare at one another. Sarah swallows.
SARAH
Do you want a digestive with your
tea or not?
BENNY
Do I want a digestive? You’re
something else.
SARAH
What do you want me to say? I don’t
remember making any of those calls
or sending those texts.
BENNY
How convenient.
11.

13. He starts tidying the mess. Sarah watches from over his
shoulder then joins him in the room, rearranging everything
he touches.
SARAH
That doesn’t go there . . . please
stop helping.
BENNY
I wish I didn’t have to.
SARAH
You know I need things in a certain
way.
BENNY
Yes, I’ll make sure they arrange
your bloated dead corpse just the
way you like when I finally kick
that door through and find you
lying there in that hideous dress.
Dead!
SARAH
Oh, you’re being a tad dramatic
Benny.
BENNY
Am I? I don’t think so. You’ll
probably choke on your own vomit.
SARAH
Don’t be ridiculous, I’m never sick
when I drink. And what’s wrong with
this dress you bastard? It’s
vintage.
BENNY
I had a vintage kettle once. I
threw it away.
She looks down at the dress and tries to smooth some of the
creases out of it. She picks at a crusty stain then smells
her fingers.
BENNY (CONT’D)
You truly are disgusting.
She holds her fingers out towards him and he backs off.
SARAH
It’s just chocolate, honestly.
BENNY
Get away from me you heathen.
12.

14. She chases him around the coffee table but stretches the
dress in the process and tears the seam. She sits on the sofa
and tears the other side as well. She puts her head in her
hands and begins to weep. Benny sits next to her.
SARAH
I know, I’m a fuck up.
BENNY
Yes you are.
He rubs her back.
BENNY (CONT’D)
Yes you are.
INT. SARAH’S KITCHEN. NIGHT.
Sarah, now wearing a colourful summer dress, is sitting with
Benny around the island unit drinking wine and eating dips.
The kitchen’s immaculately clean and organised.
BENNY
He was nice but closet gays aren’t
my thing. Brings back to many
unwanted memories.
SARAH
You’re getting a bit picky.
She tops up their glasses and wipes the table although
nothing was spilled.
BENNY
Picky? Me? I’m streamlining until I
find the right guy. Don’t see the
point in settling for second best.
Did that with my ex wife and look
where that got me.
SARAH
How is TINA anyway?
BENNY
She’s okay. I’ve been out for
nearly five years and she still
doesn’t believe it.
SARAH
Well, you did go from a butch cop
to camp queen over night.
BENNY
It wasn’t over night for me.
13.

15. SARAH
I know, I meant from her
perspective.
BENNY
She hasn’t said it out loud, but
she’s waiting for me to change my
mind and move back home. Like it’s
that simple.
SARAH
Oh no, poor Tina.
BENNY
I wouldn’t go back even if I could.
Played the straight guy long
enough. And I’m happy now, I mean,
really happy.
She raises her glass.
SARAH
I’ll drink to that.
BENNY
Yep, feels wonderful, moving
forward. Leaving the past where it
belongs.
SARAH
Oh here we go, I was waiting for
the dig.
BENNY
It’s not a dig, it’s a suggestion.
SARAH
Can’t you just accept me for who I
am.
BENNY
This isn’t who you are. The woman I
met, let’s choice one example,
wasn’t a agoraphobic!
Sarah finishes her glass in one then refills her it. She
considers wiping the surface with the cloth but pauses. They
stare at each other.
BENNY (CONT’D)
There’s a word for that as well.
She wipes the clean surface anyway then straightens the glass
coasters into slightly different positions.
SARAH
This is who I am Benny.
14.

16. BENNY
And who’s that exactly? You’re not
an artist anymore. You’re not a
wife, you’re not...
SARAH
Stop telling me what I’m not. We’re
both different people Benny. You’re
gay now! That’s a pretty
significant change.
BENNY
I’m still the same person...
Sarah stands up, finishes her glass again in one her wine up
a little clumsiley then wipes the splashes up.
SARAH
Really? You think so? The Benny I
first met, Benny the Police
Officer, Benny, my husband’s
partner, was a macho, beer drinking
chauvinist pig. I didn’t like that
guy.
She opens the fridge and removes a bottle of white wine.
BENNY
Really? You kept that quiet.
She unscrews the bottle, wipes the moisture off it before
placing it on the worktop.
SARAH
Now we talk about art, the men you
sleep with, you use words like
heathen! You’re gentle, you’ve been
there for me, you’ve listened.
You’ve done and become everything
the old Benny could never. So don’t
tell me you haven’t changed.
Benny swirls the wine around his glass. Sarah sits back onto
her stool and wipes the surface and moves the glass coaster
again.
BENNY
Well, when you put it that way.
He looks up and they start laughing.
15.

17. INT. APARTMENT IN MANCHESTER. NIGHT
Twenty three year old ROSE is stuffing a few items of
clothing into a rucksack. She’s rushing around the bedroom
looking for something. She’s getting stressed.
ROSE
Where is it?
She takes a moment. Looks in the mirror, smoothes the puffy
skin under her eyes, removes a hair band from her wrist and
ties her thick blonde dreadlocks behind her head.
ROSE (CONT’D)
If I was a sadistic piece of shit,
where would I put...
She turns towards the adjacent room and rushes into it. The
apartment is uber trendy. The kitchen/living space is filled
with expensive appliances and furniture. She navigates the
corner sofa and reaches a small porcelain Buddha sitting
happily on top of the fire place. She picks it up.
ROSE (CONT’D)
Be lucky.
Rose smashes the Buddha on the tiled floor surrounding the
fireplace. She looks down at the memory stick on the floor.
ROSE (CONT’D)
Thanks Buddha.
She picks up the memory stick and runs back into the bedroom,
grabs the rucksack and returns to the front door. She reaches
for the handle but remembers something else and heads back
into the kitchen. She removes three bundles of cash from the
top compartment of the freezer and places them inside her
rucksack. She looks around then walks purposely to the front
door.
ROSE (CONT’D)
Fuck you.
As she touches the handle, the sound of keys jingling on the
other side of the door startles her. She’s momentarily frozen
with fear before quickly and quietly sliding into the
bathroom. The front door opens as she hides behind the
bathroom door.
RAZER (O.S.)(ACCENTED WELSH)
(on a mobile)
Everything stays the same, you
don’t have to worry.
Cautiously, Rose looks through the gap in the door. Her, now,
ex boyfriend RAZER is out of view.
16.

18. RAZER (O.S.) (CONT’D)
(on the mobile)
The police? They don’t matter.
Everything is perfect...
There’s silence. Rose takes a chance and slowly widens the
gap in the door. The hinge squeaks and she retreats
backwards, knocking an aftershave bottle off the shelf in the
panic. She skillfully catches it.
RAZER (O.S.) (CONT’D)
I’ll have to call you back. Stay
happy.
She places it on the floor and returns to the door to gauge
Razer’s position. He’s still out of sight. More silence.
RAZER (O.S.) (CONT’D)
Oh Rose Bud, what have you done?
She winces at the mention of her name. Suddenly, she’s
overcome with panic and searches her pockets and her
rucksack. She locates her phone, fumbles slightly and turns
it to silent a split second before the screen flashes with an
incoming call from Razer. The call goes to voicemail.
RAZER (O.S.) (CONT’D)
Stay happy my little Rose Bud,
catch up with you soon.
More silence.
Rose inches forward and peeks through the gap in the door.
She falls backwards in shock as Razer begins destroying the
apartment. He doesn’t utter a sound as the crashing and
smashing ends as suddenly as it began.
More silence. Rose doesn’t move an inch.
RAZER (O.S.) (CONT’D)
(on his mobile)
Pick me up an energiser smoothie
from Alberts and meet me outside in
ten minutes.
Rose shuts her eyes and anticipates the worst as Razer’s
footsteps approach from behind the bathroom door. Rose keeps
her eyes tightly closed and holds her breath. The front door
opens and he exits. Rose vomits on the floor.
17.

19. EXT. CREMATORIUM. DAY
A large flower arrangement spelling out JOHN sits outside on
the wall. Mourners exit the building and shake hands with the
Vicar and members of John’s family. Eileen and Deb, both in
black, link arms and approach PAT, John’s sister who’s the
spitting image of her deceased brother only with long hair
and wearing a dress.
DEB
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Deb and Pat gently shake hands. Eileen extends her hand.
PAT
You’ve got a nerve.
Pat smiles and shakes hands with another mourner, ignoring
Eileen’s outstretched hand.
PAT (CONT’D)
(to the mourner)
Thanks for coming
EILEEN
What does that mean?
PAT
(back to Eileen)
You know exactly what...
Pat’s husband ALAN, a small wiry man with a gentle manner,
steps forward and places a hand on his wife’s arm.
ALAN
Patricia.
His touch is enough to defuse the situation. Pat continues to
greet other mourners. Deb encourages Eileen to walk away but
she’s not so eager to end it there.
EILEEN
No, I want to know what she means.
DEB
Let’s go Eileen.
Deb tugs Eileen away.
PAT
You know what you did.
Eileen frees her arm from Deb and marches back to Pat.
EILEEN
You have no right to...
18.

20. Pat slaps Eileen’s face. Nobody moves except the Vicar. He
raises his eyebrows towards Alan who shrugs his shoulders in
response.
PAT
You’re the one who’s no right. No
right to be here, no right to speak
to me about my beautiful John,
sweet naive John.
Eileen rubs her cheek and holds back the tears filling her
eyes. Deb attempts to pull Eileen away again.
DEB
Come on, don’t listen to this stuck
up cow. John loved you to bits.
PAT
I bet he did. All men like to try a
slut on for size now and again. My
poor John always had a soft spot
for the pathetic.
ALAN
That’s enough dear.
Again, Alan’s touch and gentle tone calms the situation and
Eileen allows Deb to lead her away.
DEB
She dun know anythin’ babe. Don’t
let her get under your skin.
PAT (O.S.)
And don’t bother comin’ to the club
either, you’re not welcome. It’s
for family and friends, not sluts.
A single tear escapes from Eileen’s eye and streams down her
cheek. Any trace of moisture is removed in an instant with
the back of her hand and she follows Deb away from the crowd.
They walk in silence until they reach Deb’s battered Ford.
DEB
Where you wanna go?
EILEEN
Somewhere with Gin and as far away
from here as possible.
The friends enter the car. Smoke escapes from the windows as
they roll them down and drive away.
19.

21. EXT. SARAH’S COTTAGE. DAY
Sarah and Benny, both looking a bit rough, stand at the front
door.
BENNY
My tongue’s like sandpaper.
SARAH
I’m sure there’s plenty of guys out
there who’ll love that.
BENNY
You’re disgusting.
He leans in and kisses Sarah on the cheek.
BENNY (CONT’D)
I know you’ll only get annoyed but
I’ll ask anyway. There’s a new art
installation opening in the city
this week. A friend of a friend.
The Joy of Junk or something. You
fancy it?
SARAH
You know the answer.
BENNY
I do. Not gonna stop trying though.
SARAH
And I don’t want you to.
Benny enters his electric car and drives away. Sarah stands
for a few moments and watches him disappear around the corner
until she’s left alone with the sounds of the country. She
closes the door and walks along the hallway, through the
kitchen and out the back door into the garden.
A rope swing hangs from an apple tree in the middle of the
garden. Sarah walks over and sits down. She pushes off the
ground and swings gently back and forth, carefree and happy.
Opposite is a large outhouse and Sarah tries to avoid looking
directly at it. She plants both feet back on the ground and
stops the swing. Suddenly realising she’s biting her nails
she quickly withdraws her hand from her mouth and stands.
She walks back towards the house then turns, marches towards
the outhouse, reaches it, grabs the handle, opens the door,
slams it shut, walks back to the house and slams that door
even harder.
She opens the kitchen window blind, peeks out then shuts it
again.
20.

22. EXT. BEER GARDEN. DAY
Eileen and Deb are pissed!
DEB
I bet she’s never had an orgasm.
EILEEN
Please stop.
DEB
I bet, she’s dryer than the desert.
EILEEN
Please!
The friends laugh. Deb hands Eileen a cig and they both light
up.
DEB
So, what you gonna do?
Eileen takes a drag on her cig and ponders the question.
DEB (CONT’D)
I know you aint’ stayin’ round
here.
EILEEN
Really?
DEB
I might not av’ known you long, but
I know you well enough.
EILEEN
I must be losing it.
DEB
Maybe?
They swig their drinks and smoke.
EILEEN
Majorca.
DEB
Majorca? Wasn’t expectin’ that.
Why?
EILEEN
Let’s call it my safe place.
DEB
When?
EILEEN
Tomorrow. Ticket’s already booked.
21.

23. DEB
Wow, I’m impressed.
EILEEN
I tend to make quick decisions. Not
always good ones.
Eileen reaches over the table and holds her friends hands.
EILEEN (CONT’D)
I couldn’t have made it through
this week without you.
DEB
Oh stop it. You’ll av’ me cryin’ in
a minute.
EILEEN
I mean it. As you’ve correctly
identified, I like keeping folk at
a distance, it’s my way.
DEB
You don’t av’ to say anymore.
EILEEN
I do, and not just because I’m
drunk! I’m gonna miss you.
DEB
I’ll miss you too.
EILEEN
Ye old tart.
DEB
Ye old slapper.
EILEEN
To John.
DEB
To John.
They clink glasses and drink.
DEB (CONT’D)
And to Majorca. Your next
adventure.
EILEEN
I’ll drink to that!
22.

24. INT. AIRPORT. DAY
Wearing a colourful dress and black shades, Eileen approaches
the desk tentatively. FEMALE FLIGHT ATTENDANT greets Eileen
with a massive smile and a overly excitable demeanour.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Good morning. How are you today?
EILEEN
Delicate.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Nothing serious I hope.
EILEEN
Self inflicted.
Eileen hands over her passport and boarding pass.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
In a few hours you’ll be sitting by
the pool drinking Sangria and
feeling 100% better I’m sure.
EILEEN
I’m sure.
She hands back the documents.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Have a fantastic day.
Eileen rubs her temples, smiles politely and walks through
the boarding gate.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT (CONT’D)
Good morning. How are you today?
ROSE
Great, fantastic.
Rose looks around nervously.
ROSE (CONT’D)
Are there any delays?
FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Not that I know of. The quicker we
get everyone boarded, the quicker
we depart.
ROSE
I better get a move on then?
With shaking hands and a nervous energy, Rose hands over her
documents and continues to look around the boarding area. The
flight attendant smiles and passes them documents back.
23.

25. FLIGHT ATTENDANT
Have a fantastic day.
ROSE
I will now. Same to you.
She surveys the area one more time before entering the
boarding tunnel now with a massive smile on her face. She
pulls her bag over her shoulder and walks confidently towards
the plane.
INT. PLANE. LATER
Eileen’s reclined in her seat wearing an eye mask. She’s
nursing a gin and tonic with one hand and rubbing her temples
with another. Next to her is SIMON. He’s thirty years old but
dressed like an 70’s throwback. Complete with V-neck jumper
and brown cords.
SIMON
I talk when I’m nervous, it’s a
reflex or something. Nervous, under
stress or excited. Those feelings
are all connected anyway, ever
heard of fight or flight? Of course
you have, silly question. My ears
are still popping, are yours? Do
you have anymore sweets?
EILEEN
Simon.
SIMON
Yes Eileen.
EILEEN
I know we’ve only known one another
for an hour or so, but can I be
completely honest with you?
SIMON
An hour and forty seven minutes to
be exact.
EILEEN
Simon.
SIMON
Erm, yes?
Eileen removes the eye mask.
EILEEN
I’m gonna be honest.
24.

26. SIMON
My dad always says that honesty
is...
EILEEN
Simon.
SIMON
Oh, yes?
EILEEN
When a stranger, or anybody in-fact
is wearing one of these, what do
you think it means?
She dangles the eye mask in front of his face.
SIMON
Erm, they’re resting their eyes.
These planes are awfully bright, I
might get one.
EILEEN
Yes Simon, resting their eyes in
the hope of getting some shut eye.
SIMON
But it’s 13:30 in the afternoon.
EILEEN
Listen Sweetie, I’ve had an
emotional week.
SIMON
I know exactly what you mean, just
last week I nearly burnt my
house...
Eileen pours the dregs from the hipflask into her cup but
it’s barely a swig. She tilts her head back and drinks it
anyway then repeats with the hipflask. Female FLIGHT
ATTENDANT 2 walks down the aisle, Eileen reaches out and
gently touches her arm.
EILEEN
Could I get another one of these
sweetie?
Eileen shakes the plastic cup with the lonely lemon slice
inside.
FLIGHT ATTENDANT 2
I’m sorry but we’ll be making our
descent in a few minutes. Service
has finished I’m afraid.
25.

27. EILEEN
Not even a little one. I don’t need
tonic, just bring the gin. And ice!
FLIGHT ATTENDANT 2
Sorry.
She walks away. Eileen turns back to Simon who’s now wearing
her eye mask.
SIMON
It really does block out the light.
EILEEN
Give me strength.
Rose is sitting on the opposite aisle to Eileen looking
relaxed. She leans across.
ROSE
Here, av’ a bit of this.
She reveals a bottle of peach Schnapps.
ROSE (CONT’D)
It’s not gin but it’s better than
nothing.
EILEEN
You’re a life saver.
Eileen offers her plastic cup to Rose and she half fills it
with Schnapps and pours herself one.
ROSE
I’m Rose.
Offering her hand.
EILEEN
Eileen. Nice to know you.
They shake.
ROSE
Who’s your friend?
EILEEN
Who? Him? This is Simon. Say hello
to Rose, Simon.
Still wearing the eye mask.
SIMON
Hi Rose. I like your hair, it looks
strange because you’re white but
you have a pretty face so it works.
Do you like Majorca?
26.
(MORE)

28. Have you been before? I’ve never,
but someone said you shouldn’t
drink the water or eat the salad.
Is this true? I hope not, I like
tomatoes.
ROSE
Erm, I don’t know.
EILEEN
Take the mask off you silly sod.
He takes it off and blinks over dramatically a couple of
times.
ROSE
Here.
Rose offers Simon a plastic cup filled with Schnapps.
SIMON
I don’t drink except on special
occasions. Never been able to
handle alcohol. When I was at
school my friends used to buy me
cider just to see what I’d do...
ROSE
Simon.
SIMON
Erm, yes Rose.
ROSE
Don’t leave us girls to drink
alone.
SIMON
I suppose one wouldn’t hurt.
He downs it in one.
SIMON (CONT’D)
Lovely. Can I have another?
Rose gives him a refill. He drinks it in one gulp as well.
SIMON (CONT’D)
I’m going to rest my eyes now. Can
I borrow your eye mask Eileen?
EILEEN
Knock yourself out. Please.
He puts the eye mask on and reclines his chair.
27.
SIMON (CONT'D)

29. EILEEN (CONT’D)
You might have just saved my last
nerve.
Rose refills both their cups.
ROSE
To your last nerve.
She raises her cup and so does Eileen.
EILEEN
I’ll drink to that!
28.

30. INT. POLICE STATION. NIGHT
Detective ANDREW FLEMMING (Sarah’s ex) is a tall dishevelled
man with a five o’clock shadow and black bags under his eyes.
Not bad looking but appears older than his thirty five years.
It’s quiet apart from a few scattered officers working alone
behind their desks. ANDREW’s phone rings.
ANDREW
Detective Flemming.
No reply. He sighs.
ANDREW (CONT’D)
Is that you?
He sits back in his chair and massages his brow.
ANDREW (CONT’D)
You’ll have to speak to me
eventually.
Andrew’s partner, Detective LAUREN CHEN, immaculately dressed
in a grey trouser suit and white blouse walks over to his
desk and sits in the spare chair. She’s stone faced and
holding a file which she’s tapping impatiently with a pen.
Andrew raises his eyebrows and mouths the word,”Sarah.” She
stops tapping.
ANDREW (CONT’D)
Listen, I’ve gotta go. Lauren’s
here with some info and...
He gently places the phone back in its cradle.
LAUREN
You really messed her up?
ANDREW
Fuck off Lucy Liu.
LAUREN
Your stereotypes are lame. No
wonder Benny had a nervous
breakdown.
ANDREW
Not funny.
She throws the file onto the desk towards Andrew.
LAUREN
His little Rose Bud has left the
country.
ANDREW
Fuck off.
29.

31. Andrew opens it.
ANDREW (CONT’D)
Where?
LAUREN
Majorca.
ANDREW
Majorca?
LAUREN
Majorca.
ANDREW
Is there a fucking echo in here?
What’s in Majorca?
LAUREN
Tapas and bullfighting.
ANDREW
Lauren!
LAUREN
She left, he followed.
ANDREW
How do you know all this?
LAUREN
I’m a detective, it’s what I do.
ANDREW
You’re a genius.
LAUREN
This is true.
She snatches the file back from him. He looks at her with a
“What the fuck are you doing?” kind of expression. She walks
over to her desk, sits down and stores the file away. He
follows.
LAUREN (CONT’D)
We can’t go.
ANDREW
We have to. He’s isolated. If she’s
left him, he’ll be pissed. Angry
people make mistakes.
LAUREN
Doesn’t matter.
30.

32. ANDREW
I’m sorry, who the fuck are you and
what ‘ave you done with Detective
Chen?
LAUREN
She’ll never let us go.
Lauren organises her desk. Andrew considers his options.
ANDREW
I’m calling her.
LAUREN
Be my guest.
He returns to his desk and removes a mobile phone from his
suit jacket.
ANDREW
I’m making the call.
Lauren doesn’t react. Andrew makes the call. He waits.
ANDREW.
Ma’am, we need to talk about... I
don’t know the time... No. Yes, I
understand. Oh, you’ve already
spoken to Detective Chen about it?
He scrunches up a piece of paper and throws it at Lauren.
ANDREW
That’s a fair comment but we didn’t
have enough evidence then and we
still don’t. This is an opportunity
to catch him off guard. Yes... No,
but... What? Fuck me are you
joking? Sorry Ma’am. Okay, forty
eight hours.
Lauren joins him back at his desk. He ends the call.
LAUREN
What did she say?
ANDREW
Lovers tiff?
LAUREN
None of your business. What did she
say?
ANDREW
Pack your suncream, we’re going to
Majorca.
31.

33. LAUREN
I don’t believe it.
ANDREW
Neither do I. But it’s happening.
LAUREN
You know she wants us to fuck this
up?
ANDREW
I do but we won’t.
They both collect their belongings and walk through the
office towards the elevator at the end of the floor.
ANDREW (CONT’D)
You must have done something really
serious to piss her off?
Andrew pushes the button for the lift and the doors open.
They both enter.
LAUREN
You could say that.
ANDREW
What’s the lesbian equivalent to
not dipping your pen in the company
ink?
She presses the button and the doors close.
THE END
32.