The document provides tips for women to communicate powerfully and get what they want without turning people off. It discusses facts about lower representation of women in leadership positions and higher returns for companies with more women leaders. The tips include learning to negotiate like a woman by focusing on mutual benefits, watching language by removing hesitations and qualifiers, developing a strong personal brand, promoting one's brand, and finding a happy medium between being too passive or aggressive. The goal is for women to advocate for themselves effectively without reinforcing negative stereotypes.

1. Communicate
POWERFULLY
5 Ways To Get
What You Want
(Without Turning
People Off)

2. Why?

3. Fact:
less pay,
lower positions,
fewer promotions

4. Fact:
Only 15 Fortune 500 companies (3.0%)
and 28 Fortune 1000 companies (2.8%)
are run by women. Only 20% of top
management positions in the U.S.
are held by women.
– CNNmoney.com, May 2009

5. FACT:
“Companies with the
most women in
senior management
positions had a 35%
higher return on
equity and a 34%
higher return to
shareholders.”
– Catalyst Study

6. in fact....
the
“feminization”
of leadership

7. Fact:
“Women who adopt a
masculine, ‘alpha-
female’ approach in the
office earn more [and
get promoted more] than
than their more passive
female colleagues.”
– Businessweek, July 2010

8. Fact:
Women are much
less likely than men
to negotiate to
promote their own
ambitions or desires.
Men use negotiation
to get ahead and get
what they want
between two and
nine times as often
as women do.
– Businessweek, July 2010

9. Fact:
The double standard
is alive and well.
“Plenty of studies
have shown that...
we don't accept the
same behavior from
women that we
accept from men.”
Hannah Riley Bowles, co-author
Claiming Authority:
Negotiating Challenges for
Women Leaders
Psychology of Leadership:
Some New Approaches

10. 5 Tips

11. #1.
learn to negotiate
(like a woman)

12. “The Entitlement Effect”
“If you bring men and women into the lab and you
say either one of two things: ‘Work until you think you've
earned the $10 we just gave you,’ or ‘Work and then tell us
how much you think you deserve,’ the women work longer
hours with fewer errors for comparable pay, and pay
themselves less for comparable work. But if there's a
standard [that men and women know], then this
result goes away.
Hannah Riley Bowles, co-author Claiming Authority:
Negotiating Challenges for Women Leaders
Psychology of Leadership: Some New Approaches

13. What’s
In
It
For
Me?

14. Everything is negotiable

15. Women tend
to have an
easier time
advocating
for others
instead of
themselves,
so...

16. what’s at stake?

18. what’s your market value?

19. internal external
“This is
what I feel this “This is the
service is market rate for
worth” or “this this type of
is what I would service”
like to
make”
k

20. internal external
“This is
what I feel this “This is the
service is market rate for
worth” or “this this type of
is what I would service”
like to
make”
k

21. You’ll get more out of a
COOPERATIVE tone than a
COMPETITIVE one. Tip:
Emphasize the importance of the
“business relationship” - when
women do this, they are less likely
to be perceived as aggressive!
Author & Harvard lecturer Matt Smith, Tavius Consulting Group

22. Practice
saying no 100
times in 100
different
ways

23. #2.
watch your language

24. do you ask for
permission to
speak up?
Can I ask a question?
I just want to add one thing
Would you mind if I said
something?
I have an idea I’d like to
share, if you don’t mind
May I add something?

25. only While you’re
just at it, lose the
you know “hedging”
really language too.
in my opinion
sort of
kind of
apparently
I’m not an expert, but
I may not be qualified, but
but
maybe
I guess

26. Learn to say “shut up” (politely)
Oops, just a moment, I’m not quite finished...
Please allow me to finish this thought
Please hold any comments until I’m done
Please hold your questions until the end
Just a moment...
I’d like to hear what you think, but first let
me just finish this train of thought
*Phyllis Mindel, PhD
How To Say It For Women

27. blames you for issues childish
that aren’t yours
often leads to
“psychobabble”
(i.e., “feel,”
“think,”
“believe”)
“I” not effective
leadership (it’s
not about you)
takes focus off the facts
* How To Say It For Women
Phyllis Mindell, Ed.D.

28. “blah, blah, blah...”
“Be in the moment...
“present...” “The Secret...”
“The Law of Attraction”
“psychobabble”
rambling & “I feeeeel...”
nervous chatter
and... and... and...
“I’m suuuuch an Aquarius (giggle)”

30. #3.
develop a strong brand
& get comfortable
promoting it

31. 1
Like it or not, we all have a personal brand.
Purposeful or accidental, decided by you, or
decided by the people around you...

32. •talk show host?
•home & entertaining expert?
•dog trainer?
•child-care expert?
•martyr?
•satanic rocker?
•dirty politician?
Copyright 2007- 2009 Mivista, Inc. www.MivistaInc.com (888) 531-3830

33. in-demand =
high market value

34. How do you
respond to
compliments?

35. “Unwritten Rules: What You Don’t Know Can Hurt Your Career” © 2008 by CATALYST

38. #4.
develop a the part
Look strong brand
& get comfortable
promoting it

46. 1

47. The classic “head tilt” and the coy stare
say “I don’t know,” “I’m a little girl” or
“I’m sexy” – not good if you’re an
ambitious, professional woman.

48. Here are some alternatives that work.

50. 2

51. And one that doesn’t.

52. 1

53. #5.
Find the happy medium...

54. the nice girl

55. the strong woman

56. •always needs to win •never needs to win
•doesn’t listen •only listens
•doesn’t trust •too trusting
•loud •quiet
•talks very fast •talks very slowly

57. The Bitch
& The Ditz:
How the
“Year of the
Woman”
Actually Set
Women
Back
– Amanda Fortini,
New York Magazine
“....both Clinton and Palin came to represent – and, at times, reinforce – two of the most
pernicious stereotypes that are applied to women: the bitch and the ditz…. Women
regularly find themselves divided into dualities that are the modern equivalent of
the Madonna-whore complex: the hard-ass or the lightweight, the battle-ax or the
bubblehead, the serious, pursed-lipped shrew or the silly, ineffectual girl.”

59. Happy medium
can sometimes
get confused
with “Passive
Agressive”

61. “Thanks for doing “Everything is great. Just
such a great job. perfect.”
Really, thanks.
“It’s not like you do anything anyways
“Whatever you say.”

62. • be solution-oriented
• address sarcasm straight-up “was
that meant to be sarcastic?”
• ask for alternate behavior
• use active listening to uncover the
real issue (ask!)
• talk about that (honestly)

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I’ll email it to you.
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