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Lesson 4 Children and Parenting
1.
2. Even before Children & Marriage
marriage, 86% of
couples believe
that children
would put an Kids a
problem
additional Kids NOT
STRAIN on their a problem
marriage–
They are Right
3. If children have
priority over
marriage, problem
s will increase.
Kids have more
power in the home
than the stepparent
This creates
resentment, jealousy,
hurt, anger and
competition.
4. Making the
marriage a
PRIORITY
RELATIONSHIP
Paradoxically
invites the children
to gain respect for
stepparents
EMPOWERS the stepparent to actually
care for the children in loving and
sacrificial ways, due to a lack of
competition
5. We shouldn't
neglect our
children to focus
all the attention
on our spouse, at
the expense of the
children.
BUT!
Bottom Line: When push comes to shove,
we must make it clear to our children that
our marriage will last ABOVE ALL ELSE
6. Children are
threatened by a
strong marriage:
They feel of loss &
failure,
lost dream of Parental
Reconciliation
A Parent's
commitment to their
marriage is the It is the first step toward
foundation of the marital INTIMACY
home. Stepfamily
HARMONY, and
7. “It was when our 5 children came to
believe and accept that
our marriage wasn’t going away
that our stepfamily turned the
corner to
Peace and harmony.”
9. Graphics, desktop publishing, sequencing and editing my OCOI Studios
Xhilliwhack, BC OCOI.Studios@gmail.com
Cartoons permission by cartoonstock.com
Tables and graphs courtesy of Baker Publishing group
Hinweis der Redaktion
CHILDREN AND Parenting:when kids are part of the package.Even before marriage, 86% of couples believe that children would put an additional STRAIN on their marriage– They are Right
CHILDREN AND Parenting:If children have priority over marriage, problems will increase.Kids will have more power in the home than the stepparentThis creates resentment, jealousy, hurt anger and competition between the child and the stepparent
Making the marriage a PRIORITY RELATIONSHIP, then, invites the children to gain respect for stepparents and IT EMPOWERS the stepparent to actually care for the children in loving and sacrificial ways, due to a lack of competitionThis is contrary to popular wisdom. It challenges the unhealthy emotions and attitudes of single parents who are unhealthily attached to their children!
We shouldn't neglect our children to focus all the attention on our spouse, at the expense of the children. Bottom Line: When push comes to shove, we must make it clear to our children that our marriage will last ABOVE ALL ELSE
Children often feel threatened when your marriage is strengthened: They feel a sense of loss and often failure, as their dream of Parental Reconciliation is diminished.Even with the child' fear, insecurity and anxiety, about the new stepfamily, a Parent's declaration and demonstrated commitment to their marriage is the foundation of the home.It is the first step toward marital INTIMACY Stepfamily harmony, and effective parenting
“It was when our 5 children came to believe and accept that our marriage wasn’t going away that our stepfamily turned the corner to Peace and harmony.”
REMEMBER? This is based on research with 50,000 people experienced in step family situationsCondoning childish immaturity is hurting the child and both parents:1. Your partner, the stepparent will eventually leave, lonely and bitter.2. The child will grow up without the ability to form satisfying adult relationships and enter fulfilling marriageFinally, the most depressing fact!3. The biological parent will be lonely in their old age: After studying children of divorce for 25 years, Psychiatrist Judith Wallerstein observed that children of single and divorced parents rarely visit their aged parents in convalescent homes.HOLD ON TO YOUR MARRIAGE!
