Esteem is a simple word. It is worth and value that we apply to people, places, and situations. It is the amount of respect we assess. We have esteem for our world leaders. We have esteem for places like church and synagogue. We have esteem for an exemplary performance whether it is in sports, acting, or simply doing the right thing.
But the most important place we need to apply esteem is within ourselves. We must maintain our self-esteem in order to place value on ourselves as a worthy individual in the world.
Self-esteem can affect every single part of our lives. If our esteem is low, our lives will be dull and gray. Elevating esteem for ourselves is a crucial key to happiness in life.
Most people's feelings and thoughts about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship – all can have a temporary impact on your well-being.
Your own self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal "ups and downs" associated with situational changes. For people with healthy basic self- esteem, normal "ups and downs" may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor basic self-esteem, these "ups and downs" may make all the difference in the world.
People with poor self-esteem often rely on how they are doing in the present to determine how they feel about themselves. They need positive external experiences to counteract the negative feelings and thoughts that constantly plague them. Even then, the good feeling (from a good grade, compliment from a boss, loving words from a family member or friend, etc.) can be temporary.
Healthy self-esteem is based on our ability to assess ourselves accurately (know ourselves) and still be able to accept and to value ourselves unconditionally. This means being able to realistically acknowledge our strengths and limitations (which is part of being human) and at the same time accepting ourselves as worthy and worthwhile without conditions or reservations.
What we want to do is help you raise your self-esteem to levels that will enhance your life and the way you view life. It can make a tremendous difference in your quality of life. Learning techniques to raise self-esteem can be taught and put into practice in just a few days. However, it will take commitment and consistent practice to keep your healthy self-worth nurtured and nourished in your daily life.
We can show you how to improve your self-esteem in just one weekend! Three short days applying the information in this book and you will be on your way to healthy self-esteem as your life becomes the bright place it is meant to be.
2. Definitions
• Self-concept:
• Picture or perception of ourselves/ a
person's mental model of his or her
abilities and attributes
• Self Efficacy:
• The set of beliefs that one can perform
adequately in a particular situation.
2
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
3. Contd……………..
• Self-ideal: The way we
would like to be
• Self-actualization: A
concept in personality
psychology referring to a
person's constant striving to
realize his or her potential and
to develop inherent talents and
capabilities.
• Self-awareness: The top
level of consciousness;
cognizance of the
autobiographical character of
personally experienced events. 3
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
4. • Meaning in (Dictionary.com)
• Self Esteem: Feelings we have about
ourselves
• Self Esteem: A realistic respect for or
favorable impression of one self; Self
respect
4
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
5. What is Self Esteem?
• Self + Esteem
• The total, essential, or particular being
of a person; the individual: +Worth,
Value, Opinion ,judgment
5
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
6. Self-Esteem…What’s it made of?
• Your self-esteem
is made up of all
the experiences
and interpersonal
relationships
you’ve had in your
life. Everyone
you’ve ever met
has added to or
taken away from
how you see
yourself!
6
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
7. Self-Esteem
• Self-esteem refers to
the way we see and
think about ourselves
• Self esteem is your
opinion of yourself.
• High self esteem
is a good opinion of
yourself and
• Low self esteem
• is a bad opinion of
yourself.
7
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
8. What Self Esteem is Not
• Self Esteem is NOT dependant upon what
other people think of you
• Self Esteem is NOT egotism, arrogance,
narcissism/selfishness, or a desire to feel
superior to others
• Self Esteem is NOT temporary euphoria
8
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
9. How should we measure self-esteem?
9
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
10. Factors affecting on high and low
self esteem
• Your self esteem depends on many questions:
• Is your job worthwhile? Do others respect what
you do? Do you?
• Do you believe you are successful?
• How do you see yourself (your self image)?
- Improve your self esteem
- Boost your self confidence
-
• How do you feel about your strengths and
weaknesses?
• What do you think of your social status?
• How do you relate to others?
• Can you make your own decisions? A lack of
choices leads to low self esteem.
10
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
11. Development of Self Esteem
• A person develops his/her self esteem
throughout the life through experiences.
• In this regard childhood experiences play
an important role in shaping self esteem.
11
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
12. Factors that develop High and
Low Self Esteem
High Self Esteem
• If you are being
praised
• If you are listened to
• If you are being
spoken to
respectfully
• If you are getting
attention
• Experiencing
success
• Having trust worthy
friends
Low Self Esteem
Experiencing
Continuous Failure
Being expected to
perfect all the time
Being Ignored or
made fun of
Having physical or
emotional
punishment
Being criticized
12
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
13. Why Self Esteem is important?
• Having a healthy self – esteem creates
confidence, self-reliance, and overall
happiness in an individual
• Self esteem increases your
confidence. If you have confidence you
will respect yourself and then you can
respect others, improve your
relationships and become happier....this
is not a selfish goal as you will
contribute more and share yourself with
the world and those around you.
13
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
14. • Low esteem causes depression,
unhappiness, insecurity and low
confidence.
• Other's desires may take preference over
yours.
• Inner criticism, that nagging voice of
disapproval inside you, causes you to
stumble at every challenge and challenges
seem impossible
14
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
15. Change
the bad
Appreciate
life
Willing
to try
new things
Believes
in
self
Is not
a threat
to others
Doesn’t submit
to
peer pressure
Accept
failure
Leader
to
others
Good
Self
Esteem
15
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
16. 16
Who has contributed to your self
esteem?
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
17. No one can
Make you feel
inferior Without
your Consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
17
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
18. Tips for building Self Esteem
Learn to be more assertive and not
feel guilty about saying no
Think positively
Believe on your self
Make plans for the future .Set and
achieve goals
Do something challenging each day
Look your best
Eat correctly
Do something for someone else
Learn a new skill
18
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
19. Contd.
Handle things one at a time
Use criticism constructively
Ask for help – take advantage of
learning opportunities
Allow personal growth time each day
Do not say negative things about
yourself
Reward yourself often
List your accomplishments each
evening
Volunteer to share your skills with
others
19
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
20. 20
Accept yourself:Accept yourself: Stop worrying aboutStop worrying about
the things you can’t change. Be morethe things you can’t change. Be more
accepting of others and the things theyaccepting of others and the things they
can’t change.can’t change.
Try not to compare with others.Try not to compare with others.
It’s unfair. You may compare theirIt’s unfair. You may compare their
strengths with your weaknesses. Judgestrengths with your weaknesses. Judge
yourself in terms of your own growthyourself in terms of your own growth
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
21. Have Realistic
Expectations – We
expect too much from
ourselves. Perfection is
not possible but bettering
our-self should be a
lifetime goal.
21
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
22. • Emphasize your strengths.
• Change what can be changed.
Some things fast, others
gradual, and others never.
There are things we inherit
but we can change our
attitude about it. Try new
experiences.
22
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
23. 23
Best Friends
• Would you take better care of yourself?
• Would you be kinder to yourself?
• Would you be more forgiving of your human
• imperfections?
• If you realized your best friend was yourself?
• Who is always with you everywhere?
• Who is on your side when others are unfair?
• And tell me, who will never let you down in any situation?
• Who will always see you get your share?
• And that’s why I’m a best friend to myself.
• And I take me out whenever I feel low.
• And I make my life as happy as a best friend would
• I’m as nice to me as anyone I know!
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
24. • There are two
different people in the
world.
• One that says “I wish I had”
and
• the One that says “I’m glad I
did”.
• Remember you can have
anything in this world if you
just believe in yourself.
24
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
25. Final Thought
• You are a unique individual.
No one else is like you in the
whole world. This makes you
special already!
• Our time in this world is
limited. Make it happen for
you so you leave your mark in
history!
25
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan
26. “Commercial of Me”
Emphasizing the positive
characteristics and capabilities of
you, develop an advertisement or
commercial to
“sell oneself”.
It may be a radio or television ad,
billboard, sweepstakes, etc.
26
Understanding and Building
Self Esteem
- Vasudevan