1. A discussion/analysis of
the differences between
raising children in
different cultures
by: Rosanna Amato and
Melissa Jurado

2. Idea of Parenthood
France United States of America
 French believe the baby fits into the  American families typically
family, not the family into the baby want to change their life around
 The families do not have to change
to adapt to the new baby
their normal routine just because a
new baby has come into it.
 Parents feel overwhelmed
 They want to buy parenting books,
 Parents are happier
research, and read about parenting
 Make time for themselves techniques.
 Do not devote all their time to  They feel as if there are not enough
children hours in the day
 Parents do not get frantic about having a  They devote many hours to their
baby children
 They have a more calm approach  Very panicked something will go
preparing for a baby wrong
Druckerman says: ““French parents are very concerned about
their kids… but are not panicked about their children’s
wellbeing” (3)

3. Idea of “Tough Love” in French
Culture
• French children experience tough love
from their parents from the very
beginning.
• Parents will allow children to fuss and
cry in the crib. In comparison with
American parents who immediately go
to their child when they hear crying.
• French parents teach their children
how to sort through problems on their
own until the parent is really needed,
such as feeding/changing diaper.
• French parents think this idea of
having kids who need “instant
gratification” makes life unbearable
• Druckerman explains this idea as
the:“Let it be principle”
- Let the children entertain
themselves
- Do not make child’s life
constraining for the parents
(Druckerman, 143)

4. Lack of “tough love” in the U.S.
 Parents want to meet every demand of
their children to make their children
happy.
 They will sacrifice much of their own
time for the sake of their children .
 This is seen by the use of sophisticated
technology where American parents
have to have the latest baby video
monitors so that they can see and hear
the baby at all times to see if the baby
is safe and needs anything.

5. Discipline in France
 Stricter
 Children are taught to be respectful,
especially in front of adults
 They do not act out in public
 Children have expectations instilled in
them from the very beginning.
 “When I ask French parents how they discipline
their children it takes them a few beats to
understand what I mean. ‘Ah, you mean how do
we educate them?’” (Druckerman, 7)
 French view “discipline” as educational, not
as punishment
 Druckerman found that discipline is a
seldom used category and “education” is
something they imagine they do all the
time as parents (Druckerman 7)
 “American children have no boundaries, their
parents lack authority and anything goes. This
is the antithesis of French ideal. French
children have very strict limits and the parents
strictly enforce those limits but within those
limits the children have a lot of freedom”
(Druckerman 68)

6. Discipline in United States
 Parents in the United States use negative re-enforcement which makes the
child learn that when they act out, they can get what they want.
 Children act out in public
 Tantrums in stores when the child doesn’t get what they want
 We can see how in the United States children are spoiled, children are picky
eaters, children are obese, watch excessive amounts of television, etc.
 Parents feel guilt because they are working many hours and do not spend
enough quality time with their children and so they overcompensate
 French mothers recognize this guilt, “but the difference is they don’t
valorize it. To the contrary, they consider it unhealthy and unpleasant,
and they try to banish it.”
 “Guilt is a trap” (Druckerman, 146)

7. French children adapt to
adult routine
 Children in France are taught to act like an “adult” at an early age.
 They are not picky eaters, they do not throw food, they eat in an adult manner.
 Expected to behave while parents are mingling with other adults.
 French children begin to sleep throughout the night much earlier than
American children ( 2-3 months old)
 French parents can not explain why there children sleep throughout the night,
but the speculate that it is because they expose children to light during the day
keep them in the dark at night
 French parents put their children in a certain “rhythm” for bedtime
 The fact that in American we have TVs, nightlights, and other distractions in the
bedroom, it can ruin this rhythm for children.
 Once the children begins his or her education, they are taught that speaking
properly is important
 “The French logic seems to be that if children can speak clearly, they can also think clearly”
 In the United States, parents are too focused on buying baby-literacy DVDs, and everything else,
not focusing on the children’s thinking, cognitive skills, and rationalization.

8. Differences in culture
France United States of America
 Culture is not work-based  Work-based culture
 Does not have a competitive nature  American culture is such that parents are very
 Siesta – children and parents eat lunch busy working, as a result it causes parents to
and spend time together. not spend as much time with their children
• French parents do want their children to and parents feel guilt for this and want to
be stimulated spoil their child in an effort “to make it up to
• Such as talking to them and taking them to them”
tennis lessons, but are not as obsessive  1980s – started a stigma that children need
about overstimulation as Americans are. more stimulation, now Americans over
• French mothers realize the perfect stimulate children.
mother doesn’t exist and they say it to  Signing children up for soccer, ballet,
each other to reassure themselves. violin, etc.
• “While some American toddlers are  They over pack the children’s schedule in
getting Mandarin tutors and pre-literacy an effort to be successful within the
training, French kids are –by design- competitive nature of American society.
toddling around by
themselves”(Druckerman 7)

9. Pamela Druckerman Interview
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OGk5NvZZfRM
 In this interview,
Pamela points out very
interesting facts she
discovered while
raising her own child
in Paris, France.

10. Our Thoughts after Research
 We were both found the topic to be interesting and our
research helped us open our eyes to a different approach
in child rearing.
 We think that some of the ways the French culture
chooses to raise their children are very effective. However,
we understand the cultural differences and believe these
ideas just might not work in the work- based competitive
culture of the United States.
 We believe that being made aware of these suggestions
and the differences of child rearing in these countries can
offer parents ideas to think about when they are raising
their children.

11. Bibliography
 Druckerman, Pamela. Bringing up Bebe. New York: The Penguin Press, 2012. Print.
 This books focuses on the differences that the author saw in French parenting versus what she
saw through her experiences or friends experiences in the United States.
 "French Parenting? That's good ol' American Wisdom."Charlotte Observer. N.p., 27 002 2012. Web. 3
Apr 2012.
 This website comments on the book listed above and well as comments on our cultural
differences and how times have changed.
 Sealey, Geraldine. "Supermom Smackdown." MarieClarie. N.p., 22 002 2012. Web. 3 Apr 2012. <http://
www.marieclaire.com/world-reports/pamela-druckerman-interview>.
 This website provides a written interview between Marie Claire and Pamela Druckerman. It
provides information on what Pamela Druckerman to become interested in observing the
differences between French and American parenting.
 Druckerman, Pamela. Internet Videoconference Interview.
http://www.askmen.com/video/sports/pamela-druckerman-bringing-up-bebe-interview-video.html
 This is the reference to the video interview that we have provided as part of this presentation. It contains
additional information on observations that Pamela Druckerman writes about.