21. 1. Prevent your child from becoming a bully! Teach our children how to treat other people Make the consequences for poor behaviour clear Warn against retaliation Always build resilience
22. 2. How to respond if she is bullying Talk Monitor Punish Forgive
23. 3. Prevent her becoming a ‘target’ Rules for online involvement (eg: no personal details) Teach her to not respond Be selective about access and security Trust and honesty
24. 4. What if she is a victim? Notice signs of victimisation Sadness or depression avoidance of friends, school, computer or phone subtle comments about her distress Acknowledge the strong feelings that come with being attacked
25. 4. What if she is a victim? Save evidence (screen shots, chat logs) Try to identify the online bully – without retaliating Ignore, block, remove Calmly and strongly tell the person to stop
Online bullying sounds like a new phenomenon – but it is just in a new formIt is still SOCIAL CRUELTYOr, in a very basic sense – it is hurting other people.
Online bullying sounds like a new phenomenon – but it is just in a new formIt is still SOCIAL CRUELTYOr, in a very basic sense – it is hurting other people.
Online bullying sounds like a new phenomenon – but it is just in a new formIt is still SOCIAL CRUELTYOr, in a very basic sense – it is hurting other people.
Harm – real harm, is caused by online bullying:low self-esteemdepressionangerdecreased school performanceschool avoidanceviolenceself-harmPossibly greater harm than from traditional bullyingBECAUSE THERE IS NO ESCAPE 24/7
Breakdown of trust in friendship groups leads to a general damage to trust.The trauma of the social cruelty leads to young people keeping secrets they shouldn’t have to.Young people also are afraid of being denied access to their phone and computer.Young people believe they can sort it out themselves.
The guidelines for parents for kids behaviour online communication are the same as for traditional relationships: respect, respect, respect.Even young adults (Year 11 and 12) need parental consequences for poor behaviour and choices.Retaliation is the key to bullying: escalation results, and the victim becomes the bully, becomes the accused.Sometimes things go wrong. Teach our children how to bounce back. The quality of character is demonstrated under stress
Young people try on different traits and personalities – Digital masks make this even easier and more dangerous.There is a chance that ‘good kids’ become online bullies, especially if they have been victimised in a traditional setting.The College has a duty of care and obligation to respond – so do you.Social cruelty needs a firm response from parents. Ask us for help.NEVER engage with other young people who may be victims or may be responisble
Just because it is a new environment doesn’t mean we have no right to engage, or they have a right to total privacy.Time restrictions, access restrictions, collaborative rule making.The ‘Bite Back’ phenomenon is hardwired into the brains of adolescents defending their emerging personalities.Bullying needs attention to continue. Not responding is the most effective way of reducing bullying.Work with your child to help her block or add friends. Familiarise yourself with the programs she uses and find out how to lock them down for her protection.The best way to help her navigate through this is by having the type of relationship that allows open and honest conversations about difficult topics.
We know our kids well. We should note and respond to changes (even if they turn out to be nothing).If she does disclose bullying, let her know we understand that this is really distressing and that we will sort it out together.Not all online harassment involves cruel and malicious people – sometimes it is just friendships out of control!
Keeping a record helps you, the college or the police assess and respond to the bullying more effectively.Blocking is an immediate and effective course of action. Young people are reluctant to block or ignore bullies because they are concerned to read what they will say next.Using a statement like “I want you to stop writing these things about me. If you don’t I will have to get help from the school to make you stop.”NEVER RETALIATE
Girls find it challenging to break the cycle of retaliation and thing get worse and worse
Community wellbeing is a shared responsibility. There will always be relationship breakdowns, friendship hassles and weak and strong people. A healthy community will not let any of that be used as an excuse for cruelty.By working together we can keep ourselves safe and build people up.