A presentation on Academic Writing for new students in the Masters in Applied Social Work at Massey University, New Zealand.

1. Master’s in Applied Social Work
Academic Writing Orientation
Centre for Learning and Teaching

2. CENTRE FOR TEACHING
AND LEARNING SERVICES
http://tinyurl.com/6xy9hy
Academic English podcast
http://owll.massey.ac.nz
Online Writing and Learning Link
http://tinyurl.com/albanyworkshops2014 Workshops
ONE-TO-ONE OR SMALL GROUP CONSULTATIONS
Book on 09 441-8143 or slc-alb@massey.ac.nz
OR in person at the library (LEVEL 3)

3. ACADEMIC STYLE
Ordinary English
Ageism happens when someone is treated badly just
because they‟re young or old and it‟s a lot more common
than people think. What matters most isn‟t whether or not
someone‟s treated differently but whether it‟s unfair to treat
them differently in the circumstances. You couldn‟t call a bar
ageist if they didn‟t take on a 16 year-old for the job because
they‟re not allowed to have a teenager working for them. But
it‟s obvious that a bar that wouldn‟t give a job to a 50 year old
to serve drinks is being ageist if that person was good
enough in every way except for the fact that he or she was
older. This sort of thing is incredibly common, even in New
Zealand.

4. Academic English
Ageism may be defined as “unfair discrimination towards
someone on account of their age” (Smith & Davidov, 2003, p.
104). The crucial aspect is not discrimination in itself, but its
unfairness. It could not be claimed that a bar was being
ageist for refusing to employ a 16 year-old, since they are
legally prohibited from doing so. However, a bar which
refused to employ a 50 year old to serve drinks could be
considered ageist, if that person fulfilled the employment
specifications in every other respect. Recent research has
found evidence of such practices, where age is used as an
unjustified barrier to employment or promotion, in over half of
New Zealand employers (Brown, 2012).

5. Academic English is:
precise
Ageism happens when ….
Ageism may be defined as ….
concise
when someone is treated badly
unfair discrimination
impersonal
you could hardly say that …
It could not be claimed that …
evidence-based
This sort of thing is incredibly
common, even in New Zealand.
Recent research has found
… (Brown, 2012).

6. CITATIONS AND
REFERENCES
Citations are a short way of indicating the source of your
theories, models, concepts, examples or facts
In APA style, all you need to do is to put the author and
date of publication of the book, article or website you used
The most common way to do this is to put these in
brackets AFTER you‟ve used the information
Recent research has found evidence of such
practices, where age is used as an unjustified
barrier to employment or promotion, in over half
of New Zealand employers (Brown, 2012).

7. As an alternative you can use ‘according to’
and include the author(s) in your sentence
According to Brown (2012), older employees
provide three main benefits for organisations.
The first of these is ….
Or make the author(s) the subject of your
sentence, choosing an appropriate reporting
verb, for example:
claim
argue
explain
suggest point out
find / found
Brown (2012) found that age is used as an
unjustified barrier to employment or promotion in
over half of New Zealand employers.

8. Your citations need to match up with complete
references to sources in a list at the end
References
Brooks, R. M. (2010). Financial management: Core concepts. Boston, MA: Pearson
Brown, P. (2012). Equal opportunities in New Zealand: Myth or reality? Australasian
Journal of Human Resources, 41(3), 46-68.
Davidson, C., & Tolich, M. (2001). Social science research in New Zealand.
Auckland, New Zealand: Pearson Education.
Khan, I., & Chen, T. (2010). Tackling ageism: A cross-institutional approach. In J.
Johnson & T. Peterson (Eds.), An equal opportunities handbook (pp. 102-131). San
Francisco, CA: Pilot Press.
Atkinson, D. (2013, January 24). Too old to work: Too young to die? Retrieved from
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/1004532.htm
Smith, P., & Davidoff, R. (2003). Equal opportunities: From policy to practice. Central
Islip, NY: Progressive Press.
Statistics New Zealand. (2008). Demographic Trends – 2001-2006. Retrieved from
http://stats.govt.nz/demotrends-2012.pdf

9. In academic writing, most references are to
books and journal articles
surname,
initial
(year)
title of book
Smith, P., & Davidoff, R. (2003). Equal opportunities: From policy to
practice. Central Islip, NY: Progressive Press.
city
surname,
initial
(year)
publisher
title of article
page numbers
Brown, P. (2012). Equal opportunities in New Zealand: Myth or
reality? Australasian Journal of Human Resources, 41(3), 46-68.
doi: 10.1037/0278-6133.24.2.225
volume / issue number
doi number
name of journal

10. CHAPTER IN
EDITED BOOK
Author of chapter
and year of
publication
Title of chapter – not
in italics
Editors‟ names – initial
goes before and (Eds.),
goes after!
Biggins, G. (2009). Why I became a social worker. In P. Te Ara & T. Rogers (Eds.),
Social work and social workers in New Zealand/Aotearoa (pp.102-120).
Auckland, New Zealand: Insight Press.
City &
Publisher
Title of book –
in italics
Page numbers of chapter – in
brackets with pp. before

11. CITY OF PUBLICATION
UK, NZ etc
USA
Australia
city,
country
city, state
initials
Either
state OR
country
Harmondsworth, England:
Penguin.
Palmerston North, New
Zealand: Dunmore Press.
Upper Saddle River, NJ:
Lawrence Erlbaum
Associates.
Milton, Qld: McGraw-Hill.
Milton, Australia:
McGraw-Hill.
Check title of book in library catalogue and/or Google if
city of publication is not clear from the book itself

12. WEB PAGE REFERENCE
Year
author’s name
(if it’s missing put (n.d.)
(or organisation that owns the web site)
Title of page
(in italics)
Statistics New Zealand. (2009).
Mapping trends in the Auckland
region. Retrieved from
http://www.stats.govt.nz/Publication
s/PopulationStatistics/mappingtrends-in-the-auckland-region.aspx.
Retrieved from
followed by full internet address

13. REFERENCING
SOFTWARE
Microsoft Word 2007 +
Use the references tab in the toolbar
Click ‘insert citation’ + add new source
Take care with names (Hamel, Gary) and type of source
Endnote ($36 from library – and make sure you go to a
tutorial)
http://tinyurl.com/endnoteguide
Free Programmes to download (but you’ll need to learn
how to use them, through online tutorials etc)
http://www.zotero.org/
http://www.mendeley.com

14. USING SOURCES
Quotations
1) Only quote definitions:
The concept of comparative advantage states that “everyone does best
when each concentrates on the activity for which he or she is relatively
most productive” (Frank & Bernanke, 2001, p. 23).
2) ..... or really memorable phrases:
As Mundell (2002, p. 4) argued, “If it‟s right for Europe to scrap its national
currencies, why is it wrong for other countries to do the same thing?”
And, as in the above examples, copy as few words as possible and
put these inside “ “ after your own introductory phrase.

15. An example of finding and embedding a
quotation into your text
original text
Such is the realm of corporate governance, an area that
deals with how a company conducts its business and
implements controls to ensure proper procedures and ethical
behaviour.
(from page 18 of a book entitled “Financial Management:
Core concepts”, written by Raymond Brooks and published in
2010)
quotation
Corporate governance refers to “how a company
conducts its business and implements controls to ensure
proper procedures and ethical behaviour”
(Brooks, 2010, p. 18).

16. Your citations need to match up with complete
references to sources in a list at the end
References
Brooks, R. M. (2010). Financial management: Core concepts. Boston, MA: Pearson
Brown, P. (2012). Equal opportunities in New Zealand: Myth or reality? Australasian
Journal of Human Resources, 41(3), 46-68.
Davidson, C., & Tolich, M. (2001). Social science research in New Zealand.
Auckland, New Zealand: Pearson Education.
Khan, I., & Chen, T. (2010). Tackling ageism: A cross-institutional approach. In J.
Johnson & T. Peterson (Eds.), An equal opportunities handbook (pp. 102-131). San
Francisco, CA: Pilot Press.
Atkinson, D. (2013, January 24). Too old to work: Too young to die? Retrieved from
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/1004532.htm
Smith, P., & Davidoff, R. (2003). Equal opportunities: From policy to practice. Central
Islip, NY: Progressive Press.
Statistics New Zealand. (2008). Demographic Trends – 2001-2006. Retrieved from
http://stats.govt.nz/demotrends-2012.pdf

17. Summarising
90% of your use of sources will be in the form of summaries of
ideas in your own words. To do this effectively, you need to:
a) highlight the relevant information
b) turn this into brief notes
c) close the original text
d) expand your notes into one or more linked sentences
How could you summarise in ONE sentence the key ideas from
this text (from an article by Chen & Lee, 2008) for a paragraph on
Confucian ideas about leadership?
“A person who wishes to follow Confucian moral philosophy will have
the goal of becoming a junzi. The term junzi literally means the „„son of
the ruler‟‟ and has been translated into English as a „„person of virtue,‟‟
a gentleman, a „„superior man‟‟ or a „„princely man.‟‟ The term appears
107 times in the Analects (Wang, 2000). According to Anh (2008, p.
103) a junzi is a „„noble person who attempts to actualize Confucian
cardinal virtues in concrete human relationships at any cost.‟‟ The junzi
is a person who is an involved agent with others, rather than someone
who is a detached intellectual or ivory tower philosopher (Wang, 2000).
Business leaders still nominate the ideal of being a junzi as the
standard of personal integrity in China today”.

18. STEP 1: Highlight relevant information
“A person who wishes to follow Confucian moral philosophy will have the
goal of becoming a junzi. The term junzi literally means the „„son of the
ruler‟‟ and has been translated into English as a „„person of virtue,‟‟ a
gentleman, a „„superior man‟‟ or a „„princely man.‟‟ The term appears 107
times in the Analects (Wang, 2000). According to Anh (2008, p. 103) a
junzi is a „„noble person who attempts to actualize Confucian cardinal
virtues in concrete human relationships at any cost.‟‟ The junzi is a person
who is an involved agent with others, rather than someone who is a
detached intellectual or ivory tower philosopher (Wang, 2000). Business
leaders still nominate the ideal of being a junzi as the standard of
personal integrity in China today” (Chen and Lee, 2008).
STEP 2: Take the information out and put into brief notes
Confucian goal is to become a junzi – a person of outstanding practical moral
standard
Business leaders in China see junzi as an ideal (Chen & Lee , 2008).

19. STEP 3: Close the original book or screen – so all
you have in front of you is your notes
Confucian goal is to become a junzi – a person of outstanding moral standards,
which they use in social relationships
Business leaders in China see junzi as an ideal (Chen & Lee , 2008).
STEP 4: Expand your notes into one or more linked
sentences
Research has shown that modern Chinese business leaders continue to
aspire towards the Confucian ideal of the junzi, or someone recognised
as having outstanding practical virtues and social skills (Chen & Lee ,
2008).
If you follow these FOUR steps
•
•
•
•
You won‟t need to worry about plagiarism
You‟ll write more critically
Your writing will flow much better
You‟ll be more credible

20. EXAMPLE of a POORLY
STRUCTURED PARAGRAPH
The political challenge of becoming a republic needs to be considered.
Firstly, Australians voted by 55% to 45% against becoming a republic
in the national referendum held on November 6th 1999, with only the
State of Victoria giving a narrow majority in favour of the change
(Campbell, 1999) and New Zealanders are more attached to the
Monarchy than Australians (Singh, 2010). Secondly, like New Zealand,
Canada etc, Australia continues to be governed according to the
authority of the ‘Crown’ as the executive branch of Government, an
authority inherited from the colonial power, Britain (Radley & Foreman,
2003). In New Zealand, the current Governor General is Sir Jerry
Mataparae (New Zealand Government, n.d.). Thirdly, Brown (2003)
points out that Republicanism has traditionally replaced ‘top-down’
authority with a concept of a generalised power of the people and that
diversity and biculturalism are ignored. However, in New Zealand, the
Treaty Principles uphold partnership, protection and participation
(Massey University, 2009). Therefore, it is even harder for New Zealand
to abolish the Monarchy than it was for Australia, where indigenous
rights and biculturalism have been less prominent. According to the
last Australian Premier, Julia Gillard, the issue was no longer even on
the agenda (Behan, 2011).

21. PRINCIPLES OF EFFECTIVE
PARAGRAPHS
Unity
The paragraph should focus on ONE claim
about ONE topic
Coherence
Each sentence in the paragraph should
build logically on the one before
Development
The paragraph’s claim must be supported with
relevant evidence

22. EXAMPLE of a WELLSTRUCTURED PARAGRAPH
Another barrier to elimination of the Monarchy is the lack of an
alternative concept of State power. This difficulty is said to explain why
Australians, less attached to the Monarchy than New Zealanders (Singh,
2010), voted against change in the referendum a decade ago (Campbell,
1999). According to the last Australian Premier, the issue was no longer
even on the agenda (Behan, 2011). In the meantime, like New Zealand,
Canada etc, Australia continues to be governed according to the authority
of the ‘Crown’ as the executive branch of Government; an authority
inherited from the colonial power, Britain (Radley & Foreman, 2003).
Republicanism has traditionally replaced this ‘top-down’ authority with a
concept of power of the people. However, this ‘people-power’ concept
has been criticised for suppressing diversity and bi-culturalism in favour
of ‘One Nation’ (Brown, 2003) and would clearly be especially
problematic for New Zealand, where the Treaty Principles uphold
partnership, protection and participation (Massey University, 2009). If
Australia, where indigenous rights and biculturalism have been less
prominent, has struggled to develop an alternative to the power of the
Crown, how much more difficult would such a process be in New Zealand,
where national identity is a complex and central political issue?

23. UNITY
Topic sentence in the Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
The political challenge of becoming a republic
needs to be considered.
… is weak: it introduces the topic (vaguely) but makes
no claim about it.
Topic sentence in the Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
Another barrier to the elimination of the
Monarchy is the lack of an alternative concept
of State power.
… is strong: it introduces the topic more precisely and
makes a specific claim about it.

24. PROBLEMS OF VAGUE
TOPIC SENTENCE
Because the original topic sentence was so vague,
the paragraph includes too much irrelevant detail
Australians voted by 55% to 45% against
becoming a republic in the national
referendum held on November 6th 1999, with
only the State of Victoria giving a narrow
majority in favour of the change ...
... the current Governor General is Sir Jerry
Mataparae
Facts are only worth including if they make any
difference to the claim made in the topic sentence

25. TECHNIQUES FOR
GREATER COHERENCE
Coherence can be achieved by creating language
bridges from one sentence to another. This allows the
claim to be supported and developed as the paragraph goes
on. This can be done by:
Repetition and Variation of topic
vocabulary: keeps the focus on the same topic
Back-reference devices: Using ‘this’ / ‘these’
/ ‘such’ etc means that each sentence builds on the
one before, helping your argument move forward
Sentence adverbials:
Words or phrases like
‘Moreover’ or ‘On the other hand’ highlight important
steps in the argument – but should not be used too much
or too loosely.

26. 3. EVALUATION OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
The political challenge of becoming a republic needs to be considered.
Firstly, Australians voted by 55% to 45% against becoming a republic
in the national referendum held on November 6th 1999, with only the
State of Victoria giving a narrow majority in favour of the change
(Campbell, 1999). On the other hand, Australians are less attached to
the Monarchy than New Zealanders (Singh, 2010).
Each sentence seems to set off in a new direction, so it’s hard to
follow the argument
Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
Another barrier to elimination of the Monarchy is the lack of an
alternative concept of State power. This difficulty is said to explain
why Australians, less attached to the Monarchy than New Zealanders
(Singh, 2010), voted against change in a referendum a decade ago
(Campbell, 1999).
The clear back-reference and the omission of irrelevant details makes
it more coherent and easy to follow.

27. PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
…. uses sentence adverbials – in a desperate
attempt to cover up the lack of real coherence
Firstly, ........ On the other hand, ....... Secondly, ...... Thirdly, .....
However, ....... Therefore, ......
Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
…. uses just a couple of sentence adverbials
strategically – to highlight important ‘moves’
... the issue is no longer even on the agenda (Behan, 2011). In the
meantime, like New Zealand, Canada etc, Australia continues to be
governed according to the authority of the ‘Crown’ .... Republicanism
has traditionally replaced this ‘top-down’ authority with a concept of
power of the people. However, this ‘people-power’ concept has been
criticised ......