This presentation was designed for students at Massey University, New Zealand. It covers general features of effective paragraph writing, including issues of length, structure and flow of language.

1. Structuring a paragraph
1. CTL online resources
2. How many paragraphs? How long?
3. Principles of effective paragraphs
CENTRE FOR TEACHING AND LEARNING
09 441-8143
LIBRARY 3RD FLOOR
slc-alb@massey.ac.nz

2. 1. CTL ONLINE
RESOURCES
http://owll.massey.ac.nz online writing and
learning link
http://tinyurl.com/albanyctl Centre for
Teaching and Learning, Albany
http://tinyurl.com/6xy9hy
podcast
(can also be accessed through OWLL)
http://tinyurl.com/albanyworkshops2014
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts

3. 2. HOW MANY
PARAGRAPHS
Typical essays will consist of 6 – 16
paragraphs (1000 – 2500 words)
ONE introductory paragraph
Between FOUR and FOURTEEN body
paragraphs
ONE concluding paragraph
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts

4. 2. PARAGRAPH
PLANNING GUIDE
500 words: 3 – 5 paragraphs
800 words: 5 – 6 paragraphs
1000 words: 6 – 8 paragraphs
1500 words: 8 – 10 paragraphs
1800 words: 9 – 12 paragraphs
2000 words: 10 – 14 paragraphs
2500 words: 12 – 16 paragraphs

5. 2. SAMPLE PARAGRAPH
PLAN
Discuss how Auckland is planning for growth. (1200 words)
1: intro
2 & 3: future housing needs & plans
4 & 5: future economic needs & plans
6 & 7: future transport needs & plans
8: conclusion

6. 2. PARAGRAPH LENGTH
No fixed length, but at undergraduate level
between 100 and 200 words (4 – 8 sentences) is
typical.
Shorter than four sentences? It could be ok,
but have another look in case you haven’t fully
supported your claim.
Over 8 sentences? It could be ok, but have another
look in case some of the details are unnecessary or
it would be better split: two well-focused
paragraphs are better than one fuzzy one.

7. 3. EXAMPLE PARAGRAPH
- GOOD OR BAD?
The political challenge of becoming a republic needs to be considered.
Firstly, Australians voted by 55% to 45% against becoming a republic
in the national referendum held on November 6th 1999, with only the
State of Victoria giving a narrow majority in favour of the change
(Campbell, 1999) and New Zealanders are more attached to the
Monarchy than Australians (Singh, 2010). Secondly, like New Zealand,
Canada etc, Australia continues to be governed according to the
authority of the ‘Crown’ as the executive branch of Government, an
authority inherited from the colonial power, Britain (Radley & Foreman,
2003). In New Zealand, the current Governor General is Sir Jerry
Mataparae (New Zealand Government, n.d.). Thirdly, Brown (2003)
points out that Republicanism has traditionally replaced ‘top-down’
authority with a concept of a generalised power of the people and that
diversity and biculturalism are ignored. However, in New Zealand, the
Treaty Principles uphold partnership, protection and participation
(Massey University, 2009). Therefore, it is even harder for New Zealand
to abolish the Monarchy than it was for Australia, where indigenous
rights and biculturalism have been less prominent. According to the last
Australian Premier, Julia Gillard, the issue was no longer even on the
agenda (Behan, 2011).

8. 3. PRINCIPLES OF
EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS
By the end of this presentation, you should
have a clear understanding of the problems
which make this original ‘Republic’ paragraph
confusing and hard to read …
… and of the principles which make the
improved ‘Republic’ paragraph (which you
will read in full later) more readable and
convincing.

9. 3. PRINCIPLES OF
EFFECTIVE
PARAGRAPHS
Unity
The paragraph should focus on ONE claim
about ONE topic
Coherence
Each sentence in the paragraph should
build logically on the one before
Development
The paragraph’s claim must be supported with
relevant evidence
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts

10. 3. TOPIC SENTENCE
Paragraph UNITY is made stronger by
including a TOPIC SENTENCE:
usually the first or second sentence
makes a clear and concise claim
this claim ‘controls’ the rest of the
paragraph – nothing should be included in
the paragraph which doesn’t support or
develop the claim made in the topic
sentence

11. 3. TOPIC SENTENCE
EXAMPLE
Can you identify the topic
sentence in this paragraph?
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy released
by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to exceed the
total energy consumed by mankind throughout the world in one
year (Fowles, 2001).

12. 3. COMPONENTS OF A
TOPIC SENTENCE
TOPIC
+
CLAIM
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy released
by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to exceed the
total energy consumed by mankind throughout the world in one
year (Fowles, 2001).

13. 3. TYPES OF TOPIC
SENTENCE
A claim is basically an answer to a question:
WHO?
Hurricanes … mainly affect people of a certain
socio-economic class.
WHAT?
Hurricanes … are powerful weather phenomena.
WHERE?
Hurricanes … only occur in certain areas.
WHEN?
Hurricanes … only occur at specific times of the
year.
WHY?
Hurricanes … are caused by certain atmospheric
conditions.
A sentence is a claim if it’s possible to say, “No, that’s not true”

14. 3. EVALUATION OF TOPIC
SENTENCES
Topic sentence in the Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
The political challenge of becoming a republic
needs to be considered.
… is weak: it introduces the topic (vaguely) but makes
no claim about it.
Topic sentence in the Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
TOPIC
Another barrier to the elimination of the
Monarchy is the lack of an alternative concept
of State power.
CLAIM

15. 3. PROBLEMS OF VAGUE
TOPIC SENTENCE
Because the original topic sentence was so vague,
the paragraph includes too much irrelevant detail
Australians voted by 55% to 45% against
becoming a republic in the national
referendum held on November 6th 1999, with
only the State of Victoria giving a narrow
majority in favour of the change ...
... the current Governor General is Sir Jerry
Mataparae
Facts are only worth including if they make any
difference to the claim made in the topic sentence

16. 3. PRINCIPLES OF
EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS
Unity
The paragraph should focus on a single claim
Coherence
Each sentence in the paragraph should
build logically on the one before
Development
The paragraph’s claim must be supported with
relevant evidence
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts

17. 3. TECHNIQUES FOR
GREATER COHERENCE
Coherence can be achieved by creating language
bridges from one sentence to another. This allows the
claim to be supported and developed as the paragraph goes
on. This can be done by:
Repetition and Variation of topic
vocabulary: keeps the focus on the same topic
Back-reference devices: Using ‘this’ /
‘these’ / ‘such’ etc means that each sentence builds
on the one before, helping your argument move
forward
Sentence adverbials: Words or phrases like
‘Moreover’ or ‘On the other hand’ highlight important
steps in the argument – but should not be used too much
or too loosely.

18. 3. EXAMPLE OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
What makes this paragraph
coherent?
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy released
by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to exceed the
total energy consumed by mankind throughout the world in one
year (Fowles, 2001).

19. 3. EXAMPLE OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Repetition and Variation of vocabulary about
the topic (hurricanes) and the claim (exert
power) means that all the sentences are strongly
linked back to the topic sentence
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy released
by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to exceed the
total energy consumed by mankind throughout the world in one
year (Fowles, 2001).

20. 3. EXAMPLE OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Back-reference … means that each sentence
builds on the one before
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy
released by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to
exceed the total energy consumed by mankind throughout the
world in one year (Fowles, 2001).

21. 3. EVALUATION OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
The political challenge of becoming a republic needs to be considered.
Firstly, Australians voted by 55% to 45% against becoming a republic
in the national referendum held on November 6th 1999, with only the
State of Victoria giving a narrow majority in favour of the change
(Campbell, 1999). On the other hand, Australians are less attached to
the Monarchy than New Zealanders (Singh, 2010).
Each sentence seems to set off in a new direction, so it’s hard to
follow the argument
Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
Another barrier to elimination of the Monarchy is the lack of an
alternative concept of State power. This difficulty is said to explain why
Australians, less attached to the Monarchy than New Zealanders
(Singh, 2010), voted against change in a referendum a decade ago
(Campbell, 1999).
The clear back-reference and the omission of irrelevant details makes
it more coherent and easy to follow.

22. 3. EXAMPLE OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Sentence adverbials … highlight key ‘moves’ in the
argument (eg important links, contrasts, limitations etc)
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert
tremendous power. These storms are often a hundred
kilometres in diameter, and their winds can reach velocities
well in excess of 120 kph (Snowdon, 2006). With such wind
velocities, typically accompanied by heavy rain, hurricanes have
the potential to completely destroy a small town in a matter of
hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in fact, is the energy
released by a single hurricane that it has been estimated to
exceed the total energy consumed by mankind throughout the
world in one year (Fowles, 2001).

23. 3. EVALUATION OF
PARAGRAPH COHERENCE
Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
…. uses sentence adverbials – in a desperate
attempt to cover up the lack of real coherence
Firstly, ........ On the other hand, ....... Secondly, ...... Thirdly, .....
However, ....... Therefore, ......
Improved ‘Republic’ Paragraph
…. uses just a couple of sentence adverbials
strategically – to highlight important ‘moves’
... the issue is no longer even on the agenda (Behan, 2011). In the
meantime, like New Zealand, Canada etc, Australia continues to be
governed according to the authority of the ‘Crown’ .... Republicanism
has traditionally replaced this ‘top-down’ authority with a concept of
power of the people. However, this ‘people-power’ concept has been
criticised ......

24. 3. PRINCIPLES OF
EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPHS
Unity
The paragraph should focus on a single claim
Coherence
Each sentence in the paragraph should
build logically on the one before
Development
The paragraph’s claim must be supported with
relevant evidence
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts

25. 3. CLAIM DEVELOPED
THROUGH EVIDENCE
Hurricanes, also known as cyclones or typhoons, exert tremendous
power. These storms are often a hundred kilometres in diameter,
and their winds can reach velocities well in excess of 120 kph
(Snowdon, 2006). With such wind velocities, typically accompanied
by heavy rain, hurricanes have the potential to completely destroy
a small town in a matter of hours (Jameson, 1987). So great, in
fact, is the energy released by a single hurricane that it has been
estimated to exceed the total energy consumed by mankind
throughout the world in one year (Fowles, 2001).
1.
Its size
2.
Its speed
3.
Its capacity for destruction
4.
Its energy

26. 3. INEFFECTIVE PARAGRAPH
DEVELOPMENT
Original ‘Republic’ Paragraph
… lacks DEVELOPMENT. Its loosely-connected
ideas create a ‘shopping-list’ effect through:
•
•
•
•
•
Lack of focus on the topic and claim
Overuse of vague adverbials like ‘Firstly’, ‘Secondly’
Inclusion of irrelevant details
Random shifts between NZ and Australia
Adding one fact after another without explaining
how they support the argument
A shopping-list paragraph takes the reader on a
confusing journey that leads nowhere

27. 3. INEFFECTIVE PARAGRAPH
DEVELOPMENT
Political challenge must
be considered
Topic
Sentence
Supporting
argument 1
Australians voted
against - Victoria
voted in favour –
Australia not as keen
on monarchy as NZ
Supporting
argument 4
Republics have
people power – but
not diverse or
bicultural
Supporting
argument 2
Australia etc
governed by
authority of Crown
Supporting
argument 3
Sir Jerry Mataparae is
NZ Governor General
Supporting
argument 5
NZ’s treaty
principles mean it’s
harder to abolish
Monarchy
Conclusion
Julia Gillard says the
issue is not on the
agenda in Australia

28. 3. EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPH
DEVELOPMENT
Improved version
... Uses the same ideas, but ...
• they’ve been more carefully selected (UNITY)
• they’ve been clearly built from one sentence
to the next (COHERENCE)
• the claim made at the beginning is supported,
leading up to a strong conclusion
(DEVELOPMENT)
A well-constructed paragraph tells the reader where they are
going, guides them along the way and lets them know they’ve
reached the destination

29. 3. EXAMPLE OF EFFECTIVE
PARAGRAPH
Another barrier to elimination of the Monarchy is the lack of an
alternative concept of State power. This difficulty is said to explain why
Australians, less attached to the Monarchy than New Zealanders (Singh,
2010), voted against change in the referendum a decade ago (Campbell,
1999). According to the last Australian Premier, the issue was no longer
even on the agenda (Behan, 2011). In the meantime, like New Zealand,
Canada etc, Australia continues to be governed according to the authority
of the ‘Crown’ as the executive branch of Government; an authority
inherited from the colonial power, Britain (Radley & Foreman, 2003).
Republicanism has traditionally replaced this ‘top-down’ authority with a
concept of power of the people. However, this ‘people-power’ concept has
been criticised for suppressing diversity and bi-culturalism in favour of
‘One Nation’ (Brown, 2003) and would clearly be especially problematic
for New Zealand, where the Treaty Principles uphold partnership,
protection and participation (Massey University, 2009). If Australia,
where indigenous rights and biculturalism have been less prominent, has
struggled to develop an alternative to the power of the Crown, how much
more difficult would such a process be in New Zealand, where national
identity is a complex and central political issue?

30. 3. EFFECTIVE PARAGRAPH
DEVELOPMENT
Supporting
argument 1
This barrier led to
Australians voting to
keep the Monarchy, even
though they’re not really
so keen on it
Another barrier to
elimination of the Monarchy
is developing an alternative
concept of State power
Supporting
argument 2
The alternative concept
of ‘people power’ has
been criticised for
being monocultural
Conclusion
Topic
Sentence
Supporting
argument 3
This criticism is
especially valid in the
NZ context of
biculturalism.
If this barrier was strong
enough to stop Australia
eliminating the monarchy,
it’s going to even more
difficult for NZ to do so

31. THANKS – AND SEE YOU
NEXT TIME!
References and arguments are provided for illustration
of writing principles only – not for their content!
© 2014
This PowerPoint Presentation and the
accompanying handouts are copyrighted by
the Centre for Teaching and Learning,
Massey University and may not be used,
except for personal study, without written
permission from the copyright owner.
Presentation: http://tinyurl.com/paragraphs2014
Handouts: http://tinyurl.com/albanyhandouts