1. The Platinum Rule Gary Rinehart

2. Agenda Introduction (10 min) Understanding (50 min) Strenths Potential Limitations Tendencies Team Activity (30 min) Understanding communication and working styles of others Sharing “Likes” & “Dislikes” when communicating Effective Communication (30 min) Do’s and Don’ts when communicating with each profile Success Insights Wheel (30 min) Understanding our strengths as a team Understanding our potential limitations as a team

3. Content Communication Perception Personality Styles Personality Ranges Detailed breakdown Relationship problems Versatility

4. Purpose & Objectives Understand different communication styles in our team Find ways to more effectively communicate across different communication/work styles Build stronger relationship with the team

5. Ground Rules Be open-minded Participate actively Confidentiality – What is said in the room stays in the room Focus on the topic at hand Respect the opinions and input of others Listen to each other Learn about others and YOURSELF Any Others?

6. Why am I interested in this stuff? Interesting seminars Interest in understanding other’s motivations Found that in making a presentation you have the opportunity to exchange ideas Communicate Problems in communication and organization

7. The Rules Golden Rule“Do for others what you want them to do for you” Platinum Rule“Do for others what they want done to them”

8. Meaning of any Word Meaning of any word cannot be completely understood until it is placed in context in the total framework within which a communication takes place Instead of hearing what people say, we hear what our minds tell us they say that might be something totally different. Words do not have the same meaning for different people

9. Feedback Single most important method of improving communication Cannot have proper feedback until you understand yourself and the person you are trying to communicate with. Communication is a process of people relating to other people.

10. Communication 75% of day spent in: Speech Writing Reading Listening Nonverbal communication Memory

11. Communication The process of passing information from one person to another Effective Communication Must be understood Must be believed Must be accepted Breakdown in Communication Inability to convey meaning as well as words Inability to perceive or have empathy

12. Verbal Communication 7% words 38% tone 55% all other

14. Role We PlayConscience Self Role Others See

15. Perception Perception What we see Attitude What we think about what we see Every person has a perception of reality based upon Personal wants Past experience Physiological Structure Physical and social environment

16. Selective Perception We are selective about what we choose to perceive at any given time In order not to hear or see something, we must first: Hear or see it Recognize it Reject it Almost Simultaneously

17. Perception of Environment Behavior determined by perception of environment Halo effect Projection

18. Through understanding the nature of man as a rationalizing animal, we can begin to learn both about ourselves and our associates. One step in understanding is classifying our personalities.

19. What are we talking about? It is a style assessment tool – not a skill assessment A tool that analyzes the behavioral style Manner of solving problems and challenges Ability to influence and work with others Ability to work in a rapid dynamic environment Manage information and structure The categories are . . . Driver, Analytic, Amiable, and Expressive Helps individuals understand how they project themselves to different people in different situations Assists team members in developing strategies to meet the needs of the role, culture and people The results noted on your report are perceptions other people may have of you. Under stress those perceptions may be magnified

20. Benefits of this type of Assessment Benefits Gain insight regarding preferred styles of communicating Show how to present ideas to someone who has a different style Learn to value & appreciate differences in styles Provide a common vocabulary for team future references Use knowledge to enhance team as well as internal customer relations This is not a test – these is no pass or fail grade There is no ‘good or bad’ – “we need all ‘types’ to get the job done!” The information does not get shared outside of the team setting

21. Four Basic Personality Styles Driver Expressive Amiable Analytical

23. Control

24. Direct Action

25. Rejects Inaction

26. Competitive

27. Ambitious

28. Analytical

29. Organized

30. Cautious

31. Rejects Involvement

32. Perfectionist

33. PrecisePlatinum Rule is based upon how we do things and where we fit within these major styles. Introvert Extrovert Amiable Steady Relates Supportive Rejects Conflict Patient Relaxed Expressive Persuasive Inspiring Involved Social Rejects Isolation Trusting Relationships

34. Personality Subtraits Could have subtraits of one of the other types Personality matrix is a 4 x 4 matrix Each main type is again divided into 4 subcategories composed of the same personality traits Analytical Driver Analytical Drive Amiable Expressive Amiable Expressive

36. Technical Specialist

37. Driver

38. Control SpecialistAsk Tell Slow Fast Amiable Support Specialist Expressive Social Specialist Emotional Feelings

39. Characteristics of Axis Control Few gestures Cool Distant Poker Faced Facts/Logic Oriented Calm Emotional Many gestures Warm Friendly Smiles Frowns Opinions and Feelings Oriented Excitable Ask Slow Actions Avoid Risks Cooperative Supportive Leans Back Consistent Tone Limited Pressure Tell Fast Action Takes Risks Competitive Challenging Leans Forward Voice Emphasis Presses for Decisions

41. Hesitate to act without sufficient facts or precedent – waits to be right

42. Be bound by organizational procedures and methods – avoids risk

43. Do the work themselves and not delegate

44. Yield position of self and team to avoid controversy – extremely cautious and slow

46. Help to decide

47. Be systematic, organized and prepared

48. Take time to list advantages and disadvantages of proposals

49. Have viable alternatives for dealings with any disadvantage

50. Assure after decision

51. Provide solid, tangible factual evidence

53. User fear as a motivator

54. Overextend their ego

55. Over delegate and under instruct

56. Make decisions without all of the facts

58. Being involved in all the important decisions

59. Lead the pack

60. Right in line with the direction you are taking

61. Get people to start listening

62. Give the driver a choice

63. Be precise, efficient and well organized

65. Be hard to manage

66. Avoids confrontation within the team

67. Lack initiative and a sense of urgency

68. Overuse compassion and kindness

69. Not challenge the status quo

71. Good team players

72. Resolve everyone’s concerns

73. Probably does a lot more than they get credit for

74. Relationship-oriented

75. Achieve consensus

76. Be confident

78. Be unrealistic in appraising people

79. Be inattentive to details and disorganized

80. Listen selectively to team members

81. Be overly optimistic about team abilities

82. Must hold self in check

83. Excitable

84. “Trust me, life is too short”

86. Gain respect

87. Builds on what you have already accomplished

88. New

89. Unique

90. Get your point across

91. Not leader type without calming influence

92. Move at a rapid but entertaining pace

94. President Jimmy Carter

95. Chris Evert

96. Al Gore

97. Felix Unger

98. Mr. Spock (Star Trek)

99. Lisa Simpson

100. Driver

101. President J.F. Kennedy

102. Barbara Walters

103. Michael Jordan

104. Donald Trump

105. Madonna

106. Dr. PhilTell Ask Amiable President Gerald Ford, George W. Bush Michael J. Fox Mahatma Gandhi Fred Rogers Mother Teresa Expressive President Clinton Robin Williams Arnold Palmer Oprah Winfrey Eddie Murphy Sammy Sosa Emotional

108. Best around because it has been studied to death

109. Driver

110. Compares

111. If it doesn’t work, he’ll break the storeAsk Tell Amiable Studies it Sends it in Expressive Didn’t know it existed Emotional

113. Control

114. Direct Action

115. Rejects Inaction

116. Competitive

117. Ambitious

118. Analytical

119. Organized

120. Cautious

121. Rejects Involvement

122. Perfectionist

123. PreciseD C Introvert Extrovert Amiable Steady Relates Supportive Rejects Conflict Patient Relaxed Expressive Persuasive Inspiring Involved Social Rejects Isolation Trusting S I Relationships

124. Relationship Problems Problems of: Pace Driver certainly goes at a different pace from amiable Priority Expressive establishes his/her priorities on principles completely different from analyticals Nobody would get along if each practiced their own style of the Golden Rule

125. What to do? Must become versatile: Recognize our own tendencies Recognize our counterpart’s traits Try to meet the other person more than halfway

126. Who is typically more . . . Introverted Tendency not to disclose inward thoughts and emotions through verbal and nonverbal behavior Extroverted Tendency to outwardly demonstrate inward thoughts or emotions through verbal and nonverbal behaviors C S D I

127. Who is typically more . . . Indirect Tendency to speak using specific qualifying statements to describe the context Direct Tendency to say it bluntly, tersely, or in broad, general succinct statements C S I D

128. Who is typically more . . . Risk Assessing Tendency to reduce risk by deliberate examination of the alternatives or consequences Risk-Taking Tendency to take big and little risks without much examination of alternatives or consequences C S I D

129. Who is typically more . . . Continuation-Orientation Tendency to want and promote consistency and familiarity in one’s environment and life routines Change-Oriented Tendency to accept and desire a variety or change in one’s environment and life routines C S I D

130. Who tends to . . . Control Tendency to act on the environment to change it to meet one’s inner needs Accept Tendency to accept what the environment gives and use what is given to meet one’s inner needs C D I S

131. Who tends to . . . Fight Tendency to move toward or engage in conflich Flight Tendency to move away or to withdraw from conflict D C I S

132. Who tends to . . . Judge Tendency to qualify or test ideas and experiences of self and others against preconceived ideas of what “Should” be Perceive Tendency to withhold judgment or to allow for a wider variety of people, places, or things without judgment C D I S

133. Who tends to . . . Be Pessimistic Tendency to react as if the world is an unfriendly, hostile environment despite information or experiences to the contrary Be Optimistic Tendency to react as if the world is a friendly place despite information or experiences to the contrary C D S I

134. Handouts Behavior Observation Checklist Evaluate Speaker Could use on spouse, boss, interviewee, enemy Self Evaluation Sheet one at start of class Sheet two at end of class Place evaluation from sheet one in proper quadrant Bottom part describes each quadrant by opposite adjectives

136. DriverR E S P O N S I V E N E S S Very (Tell) ASSERTIVENESS (Ask) Not Amiable Expressive Very (Emote) Warm, Friendly, Feeling Oriented

137. Time for a teambuilding . . . Gather in groups (D-I-S-C) As a group answer the following questions What do we like when communicating? What do we dislike when communicating? What other communication styles bug us and why? What bugs us about ourselves? What do we say or do under stress? When we are under stress, we need others to do/say . . .

138. Communicating with the Driver Be clear, specific to the point Stick to business Come prepared Present facts logically Ask specific questions Provide alternatives and choices for making decisions Provide facts and figures about probability of success or the effectiveness of options If you disagree, take issue with the facts Provide a win-win opportunity Don’t ramble on, or waste their time Don’t forget or lose things Don’t be unprepared or disorganized Don’t come with the decision made

139. Communicating with the Expressive Plan interaction that supports their dreams and intentions Allow time for relating and socializing Talk to people about their goals Focus on people and action items Put details in writing Ask for their opinion Provide ideas for implementing action Use enough time to be stimulating, fun, fast moving Provide testimonials from people they see as important or prominent Offer special, immediate and incentives for their willing to take risks Don’t be curt Don’t drive to facts, figures and alternatives Don’t leave decisions up in the air Don’t be impersonal Don’t talk down to them

140. Start with personal comments Break the ice Don’t rush headlong into business Show sincere interest in them as people Don’t stick coldly to business Present your case logically, softly, non-threatening Don’t threaten with positional power Ask specific questions Listen carefully Don’t be abrupt and rapid Don’t mistake their willingness to go along for satisfaction Don’t promise something you can’t deliver Allow them time to think

141. Prepare your case in advance Don’t be disorganized or messy Approach them in a straightforward, direct way Don’t be casual, informal or personal Don’t force a quick decision Present specifics, and do what you say you can do Don’t be vague about expectations or fail to follow through Draw up an “Action Plan” with scheduled dates and milestones Don’t over promise Take you time, but be persistent Don’t be abrupt and rapid Don’t appeal to opinion or feelings as evidence Allow them their space Provide them with the information and the time they need to make a decision

142. Elements of Versatility Image What is our image? Presentation How do we communicate with others? Knowledge & Competence If we are a klutz, then all is lost Feed back Listen to the vibes being transmitted by others

143. Conclusion Once we have assumed all the elements of versatility, we must accept the fact that we control only 50% of any relationship If we try to make a relationship work and it fails, AT LEAST WE TRIED.

145. Persistent

146. Serious

147. Vigilant

149. Severe

150. Tough-Minded

151. Dominating

152. Harsh

153. Critical

154. Indecisive

155. Stuffy

156. Exacting

157. Moralistic

158. Determined

159. Requiring

160. Thorough

161. Decisive

163. Retiring

164. Ingratiating

165. Dependent

166. Awkward

167. Personable

168. Stimulating

169. Enthusiastic

170. Dramatic

171. GregariousEmotional