1 Running head: Title TITLE 3Letter of AdviceFinal Paper Requirements For this assignment, you will write a letter of advice to either a newly engaged couple or a group of coworkers. Imagine that either the engaged couple or coworkers hear that you are taking a course in interpersonal communication and want advice regarding how to communicate in their personal or professional relationships. Based on what you have learned in this course, what advice would you give them regarding how to communicate effectively? How can you use what you have learned in this class to offer a couple or group of co-workers advice to have more positive relationships? Write your paper in the form of a letter. Please review the Sample Final Paper. Instructions Use the list of learning outcomes to write your letter. The course learning outcomes you will need to cover are: · Explain the principles of and barriers to effective interpersonal communications. · Analyze the role of communication in developing and maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and self-esteem. · Differentiate appropriate levels of self-disclosure and emotional intelligence in various relationships. · Describe strategies for using communication techniques to resolve interpersonal conflicts. · Analyze the impact of gender and culture on interpersonal communications. For each of the five learning outcomes, create a separate heading that states the learning outcome that you are addressing. Then, address the following for each segment: · Explain the principles of and barriers to effective interpersonal communications. Why do the principles matter? How can your couple or group of co-workers overcome the barriers you have listed? · Analyze the role of communication in developing and maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and self-esteem. Begin by defining each term and then explain how these three notions of the self potentially impact your couple or group of co-workers relationship. What advice can you offer to help them develop a positive self-concept or build each other’s self-esteem? · Illustrate the importance of self-disclosure and emotional intelligence in various relationships. What role does self-disclosure play in your couple or partner’s relationship? How can their relationships be improved by them becoming more emotionally intelligent? · Evaluate strategies for using communication techniques to resolve interpersonal conflicts. Explain one or two potential conflicts and then present at least two strategies for addressing the dispute(s). · Analyze the impact of gender and culture on interpersonal communications. First, define these two key terms. Then, explain the importance of gender and culture in relationships generally and for your couple or group specifically. What advice can you give to become a better communicator based on the information you have presented? Content Requirements You must address all five of the learning outcomes and the questions listed with those objectives. F ...

1. 1
Running head: Title
TITLE 3Letter of AdviceFinal Paper Requirements
For this assignment, you will write a letter of advice to either a
newly engaged couple or a group of coworkers. Imagine that
either the engaged couple or coworkers hear that you are taking
a course in interpersonal communication and want advice
regarding how to communicate in their personal or professional
relationships. Based on what you have learned in this course,
what advice would you give them regarding how to
communicate effectively? How can you use what you have
learned in this class to offer a couple or group of co-workers
advice to have more positive relationships? Write your paper in
the form of a letter. Please review the Sample Final Paper.
Instructions
Use the list of learning outcomes to write your letter. The
course learning outcomes you will need to cover are:
· Explain the principles of and barriers to effective
interpersonal communications.
· Analyze the role of communication in developing and
maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and self-esteem.
· Differentiate appropriate levels of self-disclosure and
emotional intelligence in various relationships.
· Describe strategies for using communication techniques to
resolve interpersonal conflicts.
· Analyze the impact of gender and culture on interpersonal
communications.
For each of the five learning outcomes, create a separate
heading that states the learning outcome that you are
addressing. Then, address the following for each segment:
· Explain the principles of and barriers to effective
interpersonal communications. Why do the principles matter?
How can your couple or group of co-workers overcome the
barriers you have listed?

2. · Analyze the role of communication in developing and
maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and self-esteem.
Begin by defining each term and then explain how these three
notions of the self potentially impact your couple or group of
co-workers relationship. What advice can you offer to help them
develop a positive self-concept or build each other’s self-
esteem?
· Illustrate the importance of self-disclosure and emotional
intelligence in various relationships. What role does self-
disclosure play in your couple or partner’s relationship? How
can their relationships be improved by them becoming more
emotionally intelligent?
· Evaluate strategies for using communication techniques to
resolve interpersonal conflicts. Explain one or two potential
conflicts and then present at least two strategies for addressing
the dispute(s).
· Analyze the impact of gender and culture on interpersonal
communications. First, define these two key terms. Then,
explain the importance of gender and culture in relationships
generally and for your couple or group specifically. What
advice can you give to become a better communicator based on
the information you have presented?
Content Requirements
You must address all five of the learning outcomes and the
questions listed with those objectives. For each objective, be
sure to define key terms and relate those ideas directly to advice
for your couple or co-workers. The point here is for you to
demonstrate how these ideas can be utilized to help people in
their relationships. Try to offer specific advice they can
integrate into their lives.
Begin your paper with an introductory paragraph that has a
succinct thesis statement and that previews what you plan to
cover in your paper. If you are having problems writing a thesis,
try using the Thesis Generator.
End with a conclusion that reaffirms your thesis and restates
your key points.

3. You must use at least five scholarly sources to help you make
your points. Three should be course readings and two should be
academic articles you have found yourself through doing
research in the Ashford University Library. If you need help
doing research, visit the Ashford University Library, which can
be accessed through the Library tab in the left-navigation menu,
in your online course.
You must also draw on personal experience to offer advice or to
illustrate points. It is acceptable to use hypothetical examples
and/or your personal experiences for either your couple or
group of co-workers. We simply want to see that you can apply
what you have learned to some potential “real world”
experience.
The Final Paper
· Must be eight to 10 double-spaced pages in length (not
including title and references pages) and formatted according to
APA style as outlined in the Ashford Writing Center.
· Must include a separate title page with the following:
· Title of paper
· Student’s name
· Course name and number
· Instructor’s name
· Date submitted
· Must use each learning objective as a header that separates
each section of the paper.
· Must use at least five scholarly sources, two of which can be
found in the Ashford University Library.
· Must document all sources in APA style as outlined in the
Ashford Writing Center.
· Must include a separate references page that is formatted
according to APA style as outlined in the Ashford Writing
Center.
Final Notes
This is a formal paper and should utilize proper grammar,
complete sentences, and paragraph transitions. However, you
will write this paper in the format of a letter to the newly-

4. engaged couple or group of co-workers. Feel free to address the
people you select directly throughout the paper.
After you have written the paper, please review the grading
rubric to ensure you have met all of the requirements.
Grading Rubix
Description:
Total Possible Score: 25.00
Explanation of the Principles of and Barriers to Effective
Interpersonal Communications
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Comprehensively explains the principles of and
barriers to effective interpersonal communication. Uses course
materials, with full citations, to support all claims.
Proficient - Explains key principles of and barriers to effective
interpersonal communication. The explanation of key
terms/themes is slightly underdeveloped, or some details are
unclear. Uses course materials, with full citations, to support
most claims.
Basic - Partially explains some key principles of and barriers to
effective interpersonal communication. The explanation of key
terms/themes is underdeveloped, and/or relevant details are
missing. Uses course materials, though not always with full
citations, to support some claims.
Below Expectations - Attempts to explain some key principles
of and barriers to effective interpersonal communication;
however, the explanation of key terms/themes is significantly
underdeveloped, and significant details are missing. Does not
use course materials, with full citations, to support claims.
Non-Performance - The explanation of the principles of and
barriers to effective interpersonal communications is either
nonexistent or lacks the components described in the assignment
instructions.
Analysis of the Role of Communication in Developing and
Maintaining One’s Self-Concept, Self-Image, and Self-Esteem

5. Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Comprehensively analyzes the role of
communication in developing and maintaining one’s self-
concept, self-image, and self-esteem. Uses course materials,
with full citations, to support all claims.
Proficient - Adequately analyzes the role of communication in
developing and maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and
self-esteem. The analysis is slightly unclear or underdeveloped.
Uses course materials, with full citations, to support most
claims.
Basic - Minimally analyzes the role of communication in
developing and maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and
self-esteem. The analysis is unclear or underdeveloped. Uses
course materials, with full citations, to support some claims.
Below Expectations - Attempts to analyze the role of
communication in developing and maintaining self-concept,
self-image, and self-esteem; however, the analysis is
significantly unclear or underdeveloped. Does not use course
materials, with full citations, sufficiently to support claims.
Non-Performance - The analysis of the role of communication
in developing and maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image,
and self-esteem is either nonexistent or lacks the components
described in the assignment instructions.
Illustrate the Importance of Self-Disclosure and Emotional
Intelligence in Various Relationships
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Clearly illustrates the importance of self-
disclosure and emotional intelligence in various relationships.
Uses course materials, with full citations, to support all claims.
Proficient - Adequately illustrates the importance of self-
disclosure and emotional intelligence in various relationships.
The illustration is slightly unclear. Uses course materials, with
full citations, to support most claims.
Basic - Somewhat illustrates the importance of self-disclosure
and emotional intelligence in various relationships. The

6. illustration is unclear. Uses course materials, with full
citations, to support some claims.
Below Expectations - Attempts to illustrate the importance of
self-disclosure and emotional intelligence in various
relationships; however, the illustration is significantly unclear.
Does not use course materials, with full citations, sufficiently to
support claims.
Non-Performance - The illustration of the importance of self-
disclosure and emotional intelligence in various relationships is
either non-existent or lacks the components described in the
assignment instructions.
Evaluate Strategies for Using Communication Techniques to
Resolve Interpersonal Conflicts
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Systematically evaluates two strategies for
using communication techniques to resolve conflict. Uses
course materials, with full citations, to support all claims.
Proficient - Adequately evaluates at least two strategies for
using communication techniques to resolve conflict. The
evaluation is slightly underdeveloped. Uses course materials,
with full citations, to support most claims.
Basic - Minimally evaluates two strategies for using
communication techniques to resolve conflict. The evaluation
is underdeveloped. Uses course materials, with full citations, to
support some claims.
Below Expectations - Attempts to evaluate one to two strategies
for using communication techniques to resolve conflict;
however, the evaluation is significantly underdeveloped. Does
not use course materials, with full citations, to support claims.
Non-Performance - The evaluation of strategies for using
communication techniques to resolve conflict is either
nonexistent or lacks the components described in the assignment
instructions.
Analyze the Impact of Gender and Culture on Interpersonal

7. Communications
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Thoroughly analyzes the impact of gender and
culture on interpersonal communications. Uses course materials,
with full citations, to support all claims.
Proficient - Adequately analyzes the impact of gender and
culture on interpersonal communication. The analysis is slightly
underdeveloped. Uses course materials, with full citations, to
support most claims.
Basic - Partially analyzes the impact of gender and culture on
interpersonal communication. The analysis is underdeveloped.
Uses course materials, with full citations, to support some
claims.
Below Expectations - Attempts to analyze the impact of gender
and culture on interpersonal communication; however, the
analysis is significantly underdeveloped. Does not use course
materials, with full citations, to support claims.
Non-Performance - The analysis of the impact of gender and
culture on interpersonal communication is either nonexistent or
lacks the components described in the assignment instructions.
Provide Advice Based on Research and Course Concepts
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Provides exceptional advice in the letter based
on research and course concepts.
Proficient - Provides sufficient advice in the letter based on
research and course concepts, but minor details are missing.
Basic - Briefly provides advice, based on research and course
concepts, but relevant details are missing.
Below Expectations - Attempts to provide advice, based on
research and course concepts, but significant details are
missing.
Non-Performance - The provision of advice based on research
and course concepts is either nonexistent or lacks the
components described in the assignment instructions.

8. Use Personal Experiences to Illustrate Key Points and Offer
Advice
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Thoroughly uses personal experiences to
illustrate key points and offer advice.
Proficient - Adequately uses personal experiences to illustrate
key points and offer advice.
Basic - Somewhat uses personal experiences to illustrate key
points and offer advice.
Below Expectations - Attempts to use personal experiences to
illustrate key points and offer advice.
Non-Performance - The application of research and course
concepts to personal experiences is either non-existent or lacks
the components described in the assignment instructions.
Paragraph Development
Total: 2.00
Distinguished - Paragraphs are well-developed with each
making a single point that directly relates back to the thesis
statement.
Proficient - Paragraphs are adequately developed with each
making a single point that directly relates back to the thesis
statement.
Basic - Paragraphs are partially developed with each making a
single point that directly relates back to the thesis statement.
Below Expectations - Paragraphs are not adequately developed
with each making a single point that directly relates back to the
thesis statement.
Non-Performance - The paragraph development is either non-
existent or lacks the components described in the assignment
instructions.
Introduction, Thesis Statement, and Conclusion
Total: 2.50
Distinguished - Paper is logically organized with a well-written
introduction, thesis statement, and conclusion.

9. Proficient - Paper is logically organized with an introduction,
thesis statement, and conclusion. One of these requires
improvement.
Basic - Paper is organized with an introduction, thesis
statement, and conclusion. One or more of the introduction,
thesis statement, and/or conclusion require improvement.
Below Expectations - Paper is loosely organized with an
introduction, thesis statement, and conclusion. The introduction,
thesis statement, and/or conclusion require much improvement.
Non-Performance - The introduction, thesis statement, and
conclusion are either nonexistent or lack the components
described in the assignment instructions.
Written Communication: Control of Syntax and Mechanics
Total: 2.50
Distinguished - Displays meticulous comprehension and
organization of syntax and mechanics, such as spelling and
grammar. Written work contains no errors and is very easy to
understand.
Proficient - Displays comprehension and organization of syntax
and mechanics, such as spelling and grammar. Written work
contains only a few minor errors and is mostly easy to
understand.
Basic - Displays basic comprehension of syntax and mechanics,
such as spelling and grammar. Written work contains a few
errors which may slightly distract the reader.
Below Expectations - Fails to display basic comprehension of
syntax or mechanics, such as spelling and grammar. Written
work contains major errors which distract the reader.
Non-Performance - The assignment is either nonexistent or
lacks the components described in the instructions.
Written Communication: APA Formatting
Total: 2.50
Distinguished - Accurately uses APA formatting consistently
throughout the paper, title page, and reference page.

10. Proficient - Exhibits APA formatting throughout the paper.
However, layout contains a few minor errors.
Basic - Exhibits limited knowledge of APA formatting
throughout the paper. However, layout does not meet all APA
requirements.
Below Expectations - Fails to exhibit basic knowledge of APA
formatting. There are frequent errors, making the layout
difficult to distinguish as APA.
Non-Performance - The assignment is either nonexistent or
lacks the components described in the instructions.
Written Communication: Page Requirement
Total: 1.50
Distinguished - The length of the paper is equivalent to the
required number of correctly formatted pages.
Proficient - The length of the paper is nearly equivalent to the
required number of correctly formatted pages.
Basic - The length of the paper is equivalent to at least three
quarters of the required number of correctly formatted pages.
Below Expectations - The length of the paper is equivalent to at
least one half of the required number of correctly formatted
pages.
Non-Performance - The assignment is either nonexistent or
lacks the components described in the instructions.
Running Head: LETTER OF ADVICE
1

11. Letter of Advice
Student’s Full Name
COM 200: Interpersonal Communications
Instructor:1
Use Full Date – September 24, 2015
1 Please use your instructor’s full name.
Purpose: Use this sample Final Paper for a better understanding
of what is present in a high
quality Final Paper: Letter of Advice. We’ve included these
elements of constructive criticism to
demonstrate that even “A” quality work still receives comments
to improve the student’s thinking

12. and writing on the topic. Please note that this paper was written
when a slightly different set of
learning objectives were being used in this class. Be sure you
use the learning objectives listed in
the final paper prompt.
See the footnotes at the bottom of each page for information
about what the student has done well
in this assignment and also some areas for improvement.
LETTER OF ADVICE
2
Dear Cassy and Jeremy,
Congratulations on your recent engagement. It’s such a great
time in your life. My wife
and I have been married almost 8 years. I also just took a class
on interpersonal communications
and would love to share with you some of what I learned in
addition to some personal
experiences.2 Knowing how your partner communicates and
uses verbal and non-verbal
communication is important in a relationship and will help in
reducing miscommunications.

13. Know going in to your marriage that there will be conflict but
learning how to manage or resolve
those conflicts will help in a successful marriage. I know you
both love each other very much
and that will help get you through those difficult times.3
Interpersonal Relationships4
Interpersonal relationships are part of our everyday life.
Getting married forms one of
the most important interpersonal relationships you will ever
have. But with any relationship there
are barriers to effectively maintain those interactions. Our self-
concept is developed through our
interpersonal relationships and changes over time. Emotional
intelligence also has a great impact
on how effective a relationship will be. The amount an
individual discloses of themselves in a
relationship can vary depending on the type of relationship and
can have both negative and
positive effects. Interpersonal conflict is probably one of the
most challenging aspects of a
relationship and managing these conflicts effectively is
important to the relationship’s wellbeing.

14. 2 While we usually discourage people from using the first
person, this essay asks that the student write a personal
letter, so it is okay to be more casual here
3 This is a good introduction. It would be even stronger with a
more definitive thesis statement. The Writing Center
has a great “Thesis Generator” tool to help students write a
thesis: https://awc.ashford.edu/writing-tools-thesis-
generator.html
4 This segment is not required, but it was a nice addition.
LETTER OF ADVICE
3
Interpersonal relationships have many pieces. Imagine a clock,
there are many pieces that
make up a clock and each one has to be working properly for it
to run smoothly. With my
relationship we have set times we sit and talk to each other
about anything that is bothering us.
Just like with the clock sometimes you must work on that clock
and even make repairs. If you
work to maintain your relationship just like you do with that
clock it will run much smoother.5
Barriers to Effective Interpersonal Interaction6

15. Interpersonal communication is something we all participate in
everyday and though it is
very beneficial most of the time there are sometimes barriers
that make the interaction not as
effective. “Along with the many beneficial functions of
interpersonal communication come a
number of challenges” (Bevan, 2014).7 Three of these
challenges are misperceptions, long
distance relationships, and intergenerational relationships.8
Misperceptions, Long Distance and Intergenerational
Relationships9
Though interpersonal communications are an important part of
any relationship
sometimes there are barriers that make the interaction not as
effective. First is the misperceptions
that10 occur and most of the time the cause of this is noise that
affects how effective the
communication is between individuals. For example sometimes
work or children will keep you
5 Interesting analogy. The student has also introduced the
central themes that will be covered in the paper,
previewing what’s to come. Overall, this is a solid
introduction.

16. 6 Again, the learning objectives have changed slightly. Please
use the current learning objectives listed in the
assignment instructions. For instance, the new learning
objective now says “Explain the principles of and barriers to
effective interpersonal communications.”
7 The student does not list both authors here and this quote is
free-standing. Please be sure to introduce all quotes by
either explaining who is speaking (e.g. According to Bevan and
Sole) or starting the sentence.
8 Introducing what is to come is a great way to highlight that
the student is addressing three different barriers to
healthy relationships.
9 Good. Because this is a subsection of the header above, the
first one should be centered and then this is justified
left. See https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/560/16/
for more information on levels of headings.
10 There is a missing word here. I believe the word should
have been “can.”
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/560/16/
LETTER OF ADVICE
4
from answering a call or text from your significant other and
they11 may take the no response as
being ignored. This is a misperception caused by noise (too
much going on).12 Second13 is when
you’re having a long distance relationship which can cause
money issues because of travel, lack

17. of comfort, and tension and stress along with several other
challenges (Good point. Again,
Bevan & Sole address long distance relationship. Cite sources
whenever ideas are influenced by
them). Hopefully this will not occur in your relationship but
sometimes traveling for work can
cause these issues in a relationship. This occurred in my
relationship with a deployment and
doing your best to communicate as often is possible worked best
for us, even if it is with emails.
Sometimes it would be a short email maybe one sentence
because things were very busy, just
something to let her know I was thinking of her. Letting your
significant other know that you
there for them with calls and emails as much as possible will
keep your partner and you happy
with your relationship. As Bevan and Sole suggest, these types
of distant relationships can have
both challenges and opportunity (Bevan, 2014).14 And third15
is when there is an
intergenerational relationship which can cause issues because of
being in a different stage of life
which changes communication styles, different economic states,
and age related stereotypes.16 I

18. know this does not relate to your relationship but it is important
to remember that both of you
have different interests and entertaining both of your interests is
important to keeping you both
happy. It can also provide new and different insights17 into the
world around you (Bevan, 2014).
You will learn to work together to get passed the obstacles you
encounter. Though all these
11 Be clear about the referent. It’s not clear if the author’s use
of the term “they” is in reference to the children or if
it is other individuals.
12 Good. In Section 1.2 of Bevan and Sole, they address noise
and this was an opportunity to reference them and
give them credit and get credit for using a class resource.
13 A new topic means a new paragraph is necessary.
14 The student did not include both authors here either. The
year only has to be listed in the first reference.
15 Again, this should be a new paragraph.
16 This is an interesting point, but could be developed a bit
more to be more meaningful
17 This was an opportunity for the student to explain a few of
them.
LETTER OF ADVICE
5

19. barriers could have negative effects on your interpersonal
interaction they are barriers that can be
worked through.
Self-Concept18
Self-concept will not only have effects on your identity and the
way you perceive yourself but
will also affect the relationships you form and the way you
communicate in those relationships.19
“Researchers believe that self-concept is a complex mix of how
we see ourselves, what others
have told us about ourselves, and what society says we should
be” (Bevan,2014).20 “Though
self-concept is an internal process, it is learned, maintained, and
can change through
interpersonal communication”21 (Bevan, 2014). Our22 self-
concept is developed through the
interpersonal relationships we have through the years and can
go through changes as we get
older. You can let what others say define you or you can change
your self-concept through your
interpersonal communications. Having a positive self-concept
will likely help in a successful
relationship. If others say negative things about you and you
begin to believe these things it will

20. likely affect your relationship. This could lead to a bad self-
concept and letting this affect you in
a negative way it could have negative effects on your current
interpersonal relationships.23 “A
person with high self-concept clarity should experience greater
relationship satisfaction and
commitment, in part, because of inclusion of other in the self”
(Lewandowski, 2010). If you
18 Please center the text here as this is a new section of the
paper. And remember, the learning objectives have
changed. Use the ones listed in the final paper instructions –
“Analyze the role of communication in developing and
maintaining one’s self-concept, self-image, and self-esteem.”
19 Excellent point. This is the gist of the importance of self-
concept and how it relates to communication and
relationships.
20 Per APA style, all quotes need a page or section number
21 This is another free standing quote. Please start the sentence
with something like: The authors continue by saying
….
22 Once again, a new point means a new paragraph is needed.
23 Good point. It would be nice to see the student connect this
point to the couple as well
LETTER OF ADVICE
6

21. yourself are more stable than24 you are more attractive to your
partner and can contribute more
of a positive light in the relationship. Cassy and Jeremy it is
important to try and work on your
self-concept because this could greatly affect your relationship
in either a negative or positive
way.25
Emotional Intelligence and Effective Interpersonal
Relationships26
Being emotionally intelligent is a very important aspect of any
relationship. It is
important to not only understand your feelings but also the
person you are having a relationship
with.27 According to Michelle Pence and Andrea Vickery
(2012), “being able to listen in an
active-empathic way is positively related to having emotional
intelligence, which involves the
ability to monitor, regulate, and discriminate among your own
and your partner's feelings in
order to guide your thoughts and actions” (Salovey & Mayer,
1990) (Bevan, 2014).28 In an
article by the American Journal of Family Therapy, they

22. describe29 emotional intelligence as
being able to recognize emotions in the self and others
(Malouff, 2014).30 Being empathetic with
what your partner has to say is also an important element to
your relationship. “One of the
primary benefits of relational partners sharing their thoughts
and feelings with each other is that
doing so helps each partner understand the emotions of the
other person. It is for this reason that
researchers call empathy "a central and crucial" component of
healthy romantic couple
functioning” (Bevan, 2014). In any relationship especially a
romantic one being an active and
24 “Than” is used for comparisons, such as “This is ‘more than’
enough food.” If you start a sentence with “if,
which happens here, use “then.”
25 Explain how and why by using a specific scenario. Also,
whenever possible, try to create some transitions
between sections.
26 Please note that the learning objective now also covers self-
disclosure.
27 Great point. Having an emotional connection is a crucial
part of bonding with others.
28 When using a source that is cited in a source you read, use
this citation: (as cited in Bevan & Sole, 2014, Section
8.3).
29 Avoid using “they” and instead be precise and list the
authors. The journal didn’t describe emotional intelligence,
the authors did.

23. 30 Use all of the authors’ names.
LETTER OF ADVICE
7
empathic listener is important and that is highly related to being
emotionally intelligent. If your
significant other is talking to you, stop and listen to what they
have to say, be active in the
conversation and show empathy.31 This shows your partner that
you care about what they have to
say, and that is extremely important in a healthy relationship.
Put your cell phone down, turn the
television off, plan 10 minutes a day to sit and talk with your
partner, it will make all the
difference. If you do not have good communication with your
partner there will likely be many
issues in the relationship.
Listening32
As I mentioned earlier listening is another key factor in a
healthy relationship. “Listening
skills are some of the most important ways in which you express

24. consideration for other
people—by making good eye contact, appropriately smiling,
being engaged with the other
person, and responding with meaningful questions and
comments”(Bevan, 2014). When you
make your partner feel important and loved it builds a stronger
bond. “If you do not listen during
an interaction, then you cannot understand others, respond
appropriately to what they say, or
provide helpful feedback” (Bevan, 2014). Listening leads to
better more comprehensive
conversations between the two of you. Cassy and Jeremy make
an effort to analyze your
listening skills, and work to improve them.33
Self-disclosure34
Everyone has the desire to feel close to others and share stories
of their life, but how
much of this self-disclosure should be shared and how soon?
When in a new relationship
31 Excellent advice based directly on what the student learned
in class. This is how a student can show they are
“applying” knowledge from the course
32 This works for a discussion about empathy as long as the

25. student clearly discusses empathic listening.
33 While this is an important point, this advice would be even
stronger if specific strategies listed above are
reiterated for the couple and maybe even an example of when
this might come up.
34 Again, remember that the learning objectives have changed.
You must now also “Analyze the impact of gender
and culture on interpersonal communications.”
LETTER OF ADVICE
8
whether it be an online one or face to face sharing too much
personal information too soon can
leave the individual vulnerable. “Sharing very personal or
revealing information may create a
vulnerability that threatens the person’s position in the
relationship” (Murstein & Adler,
1995Terzino, 2009).35 Giving too much information too early
on could lead to being
emotionally hurt. But once in a serious committed relationship
it is important to disclose more,
but how much is always a question. Obviously you two are at a
point in your relationship where
sharing is extremely important. Knowing who you are marrying,

26. being best friends with each
other is extremely important. Self-disclosure in a marriage is
paramount in order to grow trust
with one another.36 Sharing your inner thoughts and feelings
will constantly change how you see
your partner and will help your relationship grow over the
years. I know that you two love each
other very much and this should not be a difficult task at first.
But once you have been married
awhile and life begins to get in the way, for instance children
and career demands it can become
a more challenge task. 37In an article titled “Can We Talk?”
the author talks about the quality of
the communication over the quantity. Obviously you will talk
daily but will you talk about
feelings and dreams or just about what’s for dinner and what
laundry needs to be put away? I
will admit that this happens with me and my wife, you get busy
and your communication
becomes mundane. You do not grow as a couple from these
mundane conversations, you grow
and are happier when you communicate how you feel and the
dreams you have for your family
and yourself.38 “Quality communication is defined somewhat

27. differently from study to study,
but research consistently has shown a link between happy
marriages and "self-disclosure," or
sharing your private feelings, fears, doubts and perceptions with
your partner” (Schoenberg,
35 Again, if a student uses a source that is quoting another
source, he or she must indicate this.
36 This is a crucial point. The student did a great job!
37 The student is approaching the topic from a new angle and
therefore a new paragraph is needed.
38 Excellent description of why disclosure matters in a healthy
relationship.
LETTER OF ADVICE
9
2011). So no matter how busy your life gets make sure you set
time aside even just 10 minutes a
day to focus on quality communication between the two of you
and you will continue to grow as
a couple.39
Managing Interpersonal Conflicts40
There will always be some conflict in a relationship but how it

28. is approached will
determine the success of a relationship. Management of conflict
is the most common outcome
but resolution of the conflict is recommended. “Although
management is the most likely conflict
outcome, it can be problematic when conflicts become serial
arguments” (Bevan, 2014). For
instance if Cassy tells you Jeremy on a regular bases that she
does not like you talking bad about
her family and you say you will not but it continues to be
brought up, this is an example of
management.41 The conflict will likely keep taking place.42 It
is important that instead you find
a way to resolve this conflict, so that it does not continue to
happen. “This means that there is a
strong likelihood that the issue will come up again and that the
parties will engage in future
interactions regarding the issue”. Resolution is important and
should try and be obtained, these
three things must occur for a resolution to happen:
“The parties in the conflict decide to end the conflict.
The parties are both satisfied with the outcome of the conflict.
The parties do not engage in or deal with the conflict again”

29. (Bevan, 2014).
39 This is a great point. It would be nice to hear what this
“growth” might mean.
40 The language now says “Evaluate strategies for using
communication techniques to resolve interpersonal
conflicts.”
41 The student could have been more specific here by adding
the word “poor” to management.
42 The student offers a good illustration of the importance of
confiding in others and taking it into account in how
one acts in the future.
LETTER OF ADVICE
10
With conflict management you’re basically agreeing to
disagree43 and the conflict is not resolved
and will more than likely come up again. For the well-being
your relationship both of you need
to make an effort to resolve the conflict, not just manage the
conflict.44 This could be dangerous
for you both and each time the conflict could grow and cause
more stress on the relationship.
Resolution to the conflict needs to occur in order to have a more
peaceful relationship.

30. So Cassy and Jeremy in closing if you do everything you can to
keep your relationship
healthy by working at it on a daily bases it will run more
smoothly. Just as I mentioned earlier it
is like a clock and needs all the parts working together. To have
a healthy, happy fulfilling
interpersonal relationship you must work at it. Constantly
looking at ways to better your
communication and conflict resolution with each other.45
Communicating your dreams and
hopes and your inner feelings will help you grown closer and
more intimate with each other.
Being empathetic towards your partner will also show each
other how much you care for one
another. There will be tough times, everyone has them, my wife
and I have them but putting the
work and time into your communication will defiantly46 have
positive impacts on your
relationship.47 Again congratulations and the best of luck to
you in your upcoming marriage.
Sincerely,
Student’s Name

31. 43 This is a specific type of conflict management, not all.
44 This is a crucial distinction. Nice point!
45 This is an incomplete sentence. Notice that Microsoft Word
has underlined it in green to warn that there might be
an issue.
46 Be careful with word choices. The student likely means
“definitely.” Defiantly means to do something in a
rebellious way, which is very different than “definitely” which
is synonymous with the term absolutely.
47 Nice restatement of the student’s key points.
LETTER OF ADVICE
11
References
Bevan, J. L., & Sole, K. (2014). Making connections:
Understanding interpersonal
Communication (2nd ed.).48
Lewandowski, G. W., Nardone, N., & Raines, A. J. (2010). The
Role of Self-concept Clarity in
Relationship Quality.49 Self & Identity, 9(4), 416-433.

32. Malouff, J. M., Schutte, N. S., & Thorsteinsson, E. B. (2014).
Trait emotional intelligence and
romantic relationship satisfaction: A meta-analysis.
American Journal of Family Therapy,
42(1), 53-66. doi:10.1080/01926187.2012.74854950
Schoenberg, N. (2011, January 17). Can we talk? McClatchy-
Tribune News Service. Retrieved
from http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2011-01-
14/features/sc-fam-0111-talk-relationship-
20110111_1_happy-marriages-couples-marital-therapy.
Terzino, K. A., & Cross, S. E. (2009). Predicting commitment in
new relationships:
Interactive effects of relational self-construal and power.
Self & Identity, 8(4), 321
341.doi:10.1080/1529886080210227351
48 To make this a perfect citation, include [Electronic version].
Retrieved from https://content.ashford.edu/ at the
end.
49 Please only capitalize the first word of the article title. So
this should read “
50 Omit DOI number.
51 This is mostly a very good reference list!

33. http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2011-01-14/features/sc-fam-
0111-talk-relationship-
https://content.ashford.edu/