This is a condensed slide deck from my Spring 2018 section of The Art of Self-Coaching at the Stanford Graduate School of Business.

1. The art of
Photo by Adam Kubalica [link]
self-coaching
Ed Batista
Class 6:
RESILIENCE &
VULNERABILITY
Spring 2018
Photo by Philip Leara [link]

3. Photo by Theresa Thompson [link]
Resilience in quartets 20 mins
Debrief & discussion 15 mins
Vulnerability stories 40 mins
Debrief & discussion 15 mins
For next time… 5 mins
Agenda

4. Power
Image courtesy of TED [link]

5. Power
Power pose research has replication issues
Many open questions, but not groundless

6. Power
A conclusion = the importance of physiology
Physical activity can influence our emotional state

7. Resilience
Photo by Adam Kubalica [link]

8. Resilience
Broader than Davidson
Karen Reivich & Andrew Shatté
Ability to adapt & persevere when things go awry

9. Resilience
Photo by This Particular Greg [link]
elements

10. Resilience
Reivich & Shatté
What constitutes resilience?
What characterizes resilient behavior?
elements

11. Resilience
Emotion regulation
Impulse control
Optimism
Causal analysis
Empathy
Self-efficacy
Reaching out
elements

12. As always…
Photo by Sue Clark [link]

13. As always…
A map is not the territory it represents.
~Alford Korzybski

14. RQ assessment
What are these results?
NOT aptitude or proficiency
Frequency of use & comfort level

15. Reflect
Consider Reivich & Shatté’s 7 resilience skills
How might I fully leverage my strengths?
How might I address my weaknesses?

16. With your group
You have a lot of new data on yourself
You’ve been thinking a lot about it
Self-coaching is a social process
What would you like to discuss?

17. Resilience
Photo by Adam Kubalica [link]

18. Resilience
Emotion regulation
Impulse control
Optimism
Causal analysis
Empathy
Self-efficacy
Reaching out
elements

19. Debrief
What conclusions did you draw?
What questions do you have?

20. Origins of
Photo by Harald Groven [link]
resilience

21. Origins of
Sub-optimal conditioning is the human condition.
Must that be a permanent problem? No.
~Linda Graham
resilience

22. Origins of
Childhood & life experiences matter
And change is eminently possible
Neuroplasticity is key
So what can we do?
resilience

23. Mindfulness
Photo by Strevo [link]

24. Mindfulness
OK
We got it
We’ll meditate
What else can we do?

25. Photo by Sludge G [link]
Many paths

26. Many paths
Tools in Reivich & Shatté from CBT
Multiple variations on the same theme
Identify, explore & challenge mental models

27. Mental models
Photo by Carmelo Speltino [link]
Our perceptions shape reality
How we define experiences
How we see ourselves

28. Remember me?
Photo by Rodrigo Baptista [link]

29. Reframing
The meanings we assign  Emotional response
Re-interpret a situation  Shift our emotions
Our mental models shape our experiences

30. Remember me?
Photo by Paul Colley [link]

31. Emotion
Conceptually simple
Hard to do under stress
Get MESSy to build capacity
management

32. Vulnerability
Photo by Philip Leara [link]

33. Shame &
empathy
Photo by Brandon Grasley [link]

34. Shame &
Shame = I’m flawed & unworthy
Empathy = The antidote to shame
empathy

35. Shame &
empathy
Shame  Creates distance
Empathy  Creates closeness

36. Shame &
empathy
Shame derives its power
from being unspeakable.
~Brené Brown

37. Shame &
Seeking help typically triggers shame
(or embarrassment or vulnerability)
True for many forms of disclosure
empathy

38. Shame &
But typical responses block empathy
1. “Look on the bright side”
2. “My problem’s worse”
3. “Here’s some advice”
empathy

39. Shame &
Instead…
1. Avoid judgments
2. Sense & validate emotions
3. Convey understanding (≠ Agreement)
empathy

40. Vulnerability
Photo by Philip Leara [link]

41. quartet
Debrief in your
What happened?
What did you experience?

42. Crucible stories
Photo by Dave Hogg [link]

43. Crucible stories
Meaning-making
Mental models
Connections
Empathy

44. Vulnerability
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myths

45. Vulnerability
Brené Brown
Vulnerability = Oversharing or weakness
I don’t do vulnerability
I can go it alone
myths

46. Vulnerability
So…
If vulnerability ≠ oversharing, what’s enough?
If vulnerability ≠ weakness, what is it?
How do we build trust?
questions

47. Translation is key
Photo by Robert Scoble [link]

48. Translation is key
The real world ≠ a classroom
But the underlying principles still apply
It’s up to you to translate them effectively

49. For next time…
Photo by Leo Reynolds [link]

50. Unhappiness
Photo by Jes [link]

51. Unhappiness
Subjective points of view
Stoicism, Pema Chödrön, Viktor Frankl
Which ones are most meaningful to you?

52. Unhappiness
Chödrön is a little out there
That’s why Burkeman Chapter 3 is an option
(Burkeman Chapter 2 is required, not optional)

53. & a (short) story…

54. & a (short) story…
After doing the reading, complete the worksheet
Multiple sources of unhappiness
Be prepared to disclose one
You’ll have 20 seconds

55. Please note
This exercise can be daunting
Please plan accordingly
Please don’t be late

56. Other items…
Slides posted on my site
Weekly assignment due Wed 1pm
1:1 meetings today in B206 (the usual room)