3. #10
Great Parents Have 10 Kids
No! Not really! Just kidding! (Pun intended!) They may have one child or they
may have more than ten. How many children they have has absolutely no
bearing whatsoever on how great parents are. The point is that they have
however many kids they want to have. “Want” is the key word rather than
accidentally had or unfortunately had. The point is that all the kids are wanted
very much. That may be one or one dozen, but they are all valued and all
treasured for who they are and as members of their family.
5. #9
Great Parents Are Involved In
Their Children’s Lives
This is a good one. You can tell great parents because they are involved in
their kids’ lives. They like their kids and like what their kids do! They get
involved in school, in PTA, in the kids’ sports and other activities. They may
be scout leaders, or soccer moms. They may volunteer to transport kids or
teach kids different skills. They are often paired up with other parents in all
sorts of enterprises that involve kids from drama to dance to athletics to fund
raising and patriotic celebrations. Great parents do great things with great
kids and have great times building great memories that last great lifetimes.
7. #8
Other People’s Kids Hang Out
At Great Parent’s Homes!
You can tell great parents because they are involved in their kids’ lives. Ever
notice this? You can tell great parents because other kids call their friend’s
moms “mom”. Ever hear one kid refer to another mom as his or her “other
mom”? Well, that’s a great parent. Tell tale sign, right there. Great parents
have other peoples’ kids hanging out at their houses. It doesn’t hurt if you
have cool stuff, but it isn’t necessary either. A 52” plasma TV in a home theatre
with the latest home entertainment system is a surefire way to get some of the
neighbor kids over, but I’m talking about kids hanging out in the living room or
den talking with mom and dad and just chillin’. They like being there because
they feel good there. There is good energy. It’s called mutual respect. Love.
Light. My family calls it “good ju-ju”. They like having dinner or lunch. They
feel welcome because they are welcome.
9. #7
Great Parents Talk About Parenting
With Other Parents
Great parents understand that being a parent is often a pretty thankless and
sometimes kind of lonely job. So, they reach out to other great parents for
support and for ideas. No one parent has all the answers and in the case of
parenting, more heads are definitely better than one. I think that parenting
should always be something of a group project or I wouldn’t be doing this
blog and you wouldn’t be reading it! So, you’re probably a pretty great parent
or you wouldn’t be at this point in the article! Good for you!
Anyway, great parents do talk to other parents and share ideas about what
works and what doesn’t. Think of it this way. The kids have recess to plan
strategies in how to work their parents. You thought they were just playing,
didn’t you? No way! They’re plotting against you! Great parents spend some
time talking with and sharing with each other. We need the help and support
of each other. And it’s not just moms. It’s dads too.
11. #6
Great Parents Understand The
Value Of Self Care
Uh huh. They do. Great parents understand the value of making sure that
they take care of themselves so that they can take care of the kids. If they run
out of gas, the car isn’t going to take the kids anywhere good. Self care must
be practiced for good parenting and great parents practice it conscientiously
and almost religiously. Without it, resentment grows like a cancer and can kill
family relationships just as fast. Self-care wears all sorts of faces but great
parents know what it means to them and they engage in it regularly and
purposefully. They encourage the other parent to do the same. They also
practice, when appropriate and available, care of the other parent. Tender and
attentive care of the marriage is the most important relationship in any family.
It must be given excellent care and nourishment for the parental efforts to be
effective.
13. #5
Great Parents Laugh At Themselves And
Don’t Take Themselves Too Seriously
You ever have one of those days when you feel that if you could step outside
yourself and watch your life it would be like watching an old episode of the
Keystone Cops or something like that? Or, is that just me? Don’t you have
times when you have to laugh at yourself and your situation or you’re going to
start crying or punch someone? C’mon. I know it’s not just me… Great
parents have those days and not too infrequently. They have days when they
just roll their eyes, tie a knot in the end of the rope and hang on. They
remember that “when you’re going through hell the point is to keep going!”
Don’t stop. A very wise person once said that “crisis plus time, often equals
humor”. I think that great parents develop the ability to laugh at themselves
and their situations before the passing of too much time. Great parents are
often able to laugh at difficult situations before the passing of anytime; when
they’re in the middle of difficult situations. Being able to laugh at one’s self is
one of the best and greatest stress management techniques possible to
develop. Great parents seem to have found it.
15. #4
Great Parents Give Ideas To And
Get Ideas From Other Parents
This one is somewhat related to #7, but it differs a bit as well. This one refers
to the unselfish ability that great parents have to teach others. When great
parents find something that works or when they read a great book or article,
they actually seek out and find other great parents to share it with! They also
ask what the other parents have found. Frequently, without any formal intent,
they create pretty efficient networks of other great parents with whom they
can share—giving and receiving—information on the amazing enterprise of
parenting. Great parents understand that none of us are fully prepared for
parenting and that we all need help. They further understand that we all have
something we bring to the table and can share with others. We all have life
experience that is of worth. We all have greatness within us that others can
benefit from.
17. #3
Great Parent’s Lives, Homes, And
Garages Are “Busy”!
OK. Now, notice I didn’t say “messy”. I said “busy”. I don’t want to offend
anyone here. But, I will say this: If you have a house with a bunch of happy kids
around, and you are a great parent that likes being a parent, unless you can afford
and have hired a team of professionals to tidy up for you, you probably ought to
have a somewhat messy house at least maybe on the weekends. OK?
Now, before you get mad at me and start in on me about the merits of teaching
responsible chores and work ethics and all that, I know. And, I agree. Calm down.
I agree. Really. I do. But… There are, at times, things that are more important
than having everything spotless when you are a great parent, in my opinion. I
better move on before I get in more trouble…
19. #2
Great Parents Know How
To Say “I’m Sorry”
I could, and probably will write a book on this one. I believe that one of the most
important things that any great parent can teach their children is that it is OK to
make a mistake. A mistake is a chance to learn. Period. Great parents help their
children learn this by allowing their kids to know that they, as moms and dads
make mistakes. Being a parent is a very powerful position and coming down off the
pedestal that our young children put is on is surprisingly difficult. It is also
surprisingly refreshing and freeing when we allow ourselves to come down. Some
of the times when I have felt closest to my kids of all ages is when I have been the
most penitent and most able to say, “I’m sorry”. Kids are unbelievable forgiving
and willing to assist us in our learning as parents. They’re extremely willing to
help us learn and are exceptional teachers if we will but allow them the
opportunity found in saying, “I’m sorry”. Give it a try.
Hint: You have to mean it. Kids can spot a fake or a hypocrite a mile away.
21. #1
Great Parents Like Being Parents
Huh? That’s it?
Yup! That’s it! Believe it or not, that’s even according to research! Most research
comes down to this basic fact. If you can say that you enjoy your family and like
your kids, you’re doing a pretty great job and are, in all likelihood, a great parent.
So, if you can think of your family with a smile—and a hint of a furrow in your brow
—you’re probably in pretty good shape.
22. For more great info on
parenting, be sure to check
out Davee’s page on
Family photo on front page used under Creative Commons License from http://www.flickr.com/photos/ericsurfdude/
23. For more great info on
parenting, be sure to check
out Davee’s page on
http://www.FaceBook.com/DaveeChandler
Family photo on front page used under Creative Commons License from http://www.flickr.com/photos/ericsurfdude/