Class 4

1. Dating!

2. Chúc Mừng Năm Mới!

3. • Be Confident
• Be Yourself
• Be Clean
• We’re Ready!
Dating Basics

4. • Planning the date:
• Be creative
• Activities = good
• Something meaningful to her
• On the date:
• Take control  drive, pay, hold doors, etc
• Avoid uncomfortable topics (previous lovers)
• Talk about her!
• Guys, where would you take a girl? Girls, where
would you like to be taken?
The First Date

5. • Coffee Shop (Romantic)
• Play Guitar for Her
• Take Photos Together in the Countryside
• Beach (Sunrise/Sunset)
• Watching a Sporting Event
• Cooking Together
• Singing/Dancing
First Date Ideas

6. • Awkward
• Experimental phase
• When most first dates and first kisses happen
• “Boyfriends” and “Girlfriends” don’t last much
longer than four weeks  not serious
• Not mature enough for love
• The first time Tyler was rejected
Dating in Middle School

7. • Most Americans date their first serious
boyfriend/girlfriend
• Sometimes, boyfriends/girlfriends decide to
have sex
• Sometimes, boyfriends/girlfriends decide to wait
• You are either friends or boyfriend/girlfriend 
this in between area known as “hooking up”
does not start, most of the time, until college
• School Dances:
• Homecoming
• Prom
Dating in High School

8. Tyler at Homecoming (2005)

9. • Phases:
• 1) Friends
• 2) Flirting
• 3) Hooking up
• OR
• 3) Dating
• OR
• 3) Hooking up AND Dating
• 4) Boyfriend/Girlfriend aka Facebook Official
• 5) Engaged
• 6) Married
College/Adult Dating (18+)

10. • In America, the best relationships often start as
friendships
• Why?
• Builds trust
• Show (nonsexual = platonic) interest
• Beware of…
• The “friend zone”
• In America, when a guy and girl are close
friends, the guy usually wants to date the girl
• BUT
• The guy usually gets his heart broken
• Why?
Phase 1: Friends

11. • Friends begin to show sexual interest
• How can you tell?
• Touches you, laughs at your jokes, etc
• Texting…how much does she text you?
• Do you feel a connection?
• So you’re flirting, what should you do?
• Play hard to get…don’t respond to those texts
right away. People like a challenge
• Invite her to a party/bar, not to dinner (yet)
• If you’re serious, ask her on a date
• If you’re unsure/not serious, try hooking up first
Phase 2: Flirting

12. • So you’re hanging out with a guy/girl and you
start kissing (maybe have sex)
• Guess what, you just hooked up with him/her!
• What does this mean?
• Nothing (yet)
• Hooking up usually lasts 1-2 months before
something happens
• 1) Guy asks girl on a date
• 2) Guy does not ask girl on a date
• If #2, most of the time hooking up stops and the
girl moves on (although not always…booty call)
Phase 3: Hooking Up

13. • Can you hook up with other people while you
are hooking up with a guy/girl?
• Yes!
• Should you?
• It depends
• If you are serious about the girl, you should ask
her on a date
• If you are not serious about the girl, you should
probably end things
• If you are unsure, you should probably continue
hooking up and maybe hook up with other
people too
Phase 3: Hooking Up

14. • Guy asks girl on date without hooking up (they
have never kissed or done anything sexual)
• The more mature way to get to Phase 4
(relationship)
• The less fun way to get to Phase 4 (relationship)
• After 2 or 3 dates, something usually happens
• 1) guy/girl get closer (maybe start hooking up)
• 2) guy/girl decide they are not compatible
(and then usually end things)
• Can you date/hook up with other people?
• If you are serious, no
The Other Phase 3: Dating

15. • Hooking Up = Casual
• Dating = More Serious
• Hooking Up and Dating = Serious
• The Final Phase 3 (hooking up and dating) is the
stepping stone to Phase 4 (relationship)
• Are people having sex during this phase?
• Sometimes, not always
• How long does this last
• However long it takes for the couple to be
ready to enter a relationship
The Final Phase 3: Hooking
Up and Dating

16. • Officially boyfriend/girlfriend
• Yes, it’s on facebook
• Why does it take so long to get here?
• You want to be sure your boyfriend/girlfriend is
the right guy/girl for you
• Hooking up/dating (phase 3) is the test run
• How long before couples to get serious?
• Depends, every relationship moves at a
different speed
Phase 4: Relationship

17. • How are they different?
• How are they similar?
• Discuss with your friends
Vietnamese vs American

18. • Couples usually date 2-5 years before getting
engaged
• Guy buys a diamond ring then gets on his knee
and asks his girlfriend to marry him
• It should be a surprise
• Guy should pick a place that is important to
him and her because they will both tell stories
about this moment for the rest of their lives
Phase 5: Engagement

19. • Game Over
• Just Kidding!
Phase 6: Marriage