1. May – July 2016
5958
CAREER
Ruby Wax
By 2020, stress and depression will be the
second leading causes of death and disability.
For comedian and self-proclaimed poster girl
for mental health, Ruby Wax, now is the time
for us all to adopt a more mindful existence.
X
Ruby
on the
power of
laughter,
mindfulness,
and the
scourge
of stress
W
ARuby Wax,
writer, performer
and mental health
campaigner
Ruby’s latest show,
Frazzled, is touring the
UK, exploring how
mindfulness can be
applied in daily life.
rubywax.net
| Mary Appleton

2. 60
May – July 2016
61
CAREER
Wellbeing
explorethepressuresmodernliving
impose on our brains, and how
mindfulnesscanhelpreprogramme
the way we think and feel.
“I always wanted to do more stuff
about how we behave but I didn’t
know how to present it,” she says.
“When I studied neuroscience, my
husband knew I would combine it
with comedy.”
For Wax, the greatest method of
entry into people’s minds is making
them laugh, but she’s clear about
the significance of the underlying
message she is trying to convey.
Mindfulness-based cognitive
therapy, using the technique
inspired by Buddhist tradition,
yields a 60% chance of preventing
relapse among those who have
had three or more episodes of
depression. Presenting it to the
public rather than “just practising
it in a room with 30 people” is what
interests Wax, and she takes the
responsibility seriously.
“I didn’t want to be so funny that
people didn’t get the message, but
you don’t want to bore people
either,” she tells me.
Her forthcoming show, Frazzled,
touring the UK from spring 2016,
is a follow-up to Sane New World,
and will provide an opportunity
to engage in discussion with the
star, to explore further the power
of mindfulness and how it can be
applied in daily life.
“Wemighthaveevolvedtobeable
to miraculously balance on seven-
inchheels,butasfarasouremotional
developmentisconcerned,we’restill
swimming with pond scum,” she
statesinherbookofthesamename.
Shift towards
acceptance
Shows such as Sane New World
and Frazzled have helped make
mindfulness and awareness of
mental health more accessible in
recent years, Wax believes.
“People now say they have
bipolar like it’s a badge of honour,”
she quips. “But [Frazzled] is not
just for the one in four [in the UK
who have mental health issues],
it’s for everyone – I’m not just
talking about mental illness. We
all have stress – whether it’s about
mortgages, debt, keeping your job
–anditinfluenceshowyoubehave.”
Indeed, stress in the workplace
is prolific, with two-fifths of
organisations reporting an increase
in stress-related absences over the
past year, rising to half in the public
sector, according to the CIPD’s 2015
absencemanagementreport.Some
41% of organisations also noted an
increase in reported mental health
problems (such as anxiety and
depression) among employees.
Buttherecentshiftin‘acceptance’
of stress and mental health issues
in wider society is mirrored in the
corporate world, Wax observes.
health problems.
As someone with first-hand
experience of depression, Wax
believes that the opportunity to
talk about how stress affects you,
is half the relief. “If you’re isolated,
it ends up being shame on top
of secrecy which creates more
stress,” she explains.
So what can organisations do
to support stressed employees?
“Someone needs to be brave
enough to have meetings about
this stuff,” suggests Wax. “You
don’t have to call it a meeting
about mental issues… say it’s
wine tasting!”
Understanding
mindfulness
Learning how to “cool your
engines and reboot” is key
to mindfulness and can help
relationships at work, advises
Wax. Once you can practise it, she
argues you can be more energetic
“A lot of companies are doing
anti-stigma campaigns now,” she
says. “Perhaps they realise that
some of their most savvy people
have more stress as they’re the
most ambitious. Someone lazy
won’t burn out.”
The CIPD report found 56% of
organisations are taking steps to
identify and reduce stress in the
workplace. Half invest in training
for line managers to identify and
manage stress in their teams,
and 30% provide training to help
managerssupportstaffwithmental
We all have stress
and it influences
how you behave
W
hatever your
opinion of writer
and performer
R u b y Wa x ,
watching her 2005 interview
with US businessman Donald
Trump is likely to evoke empathy
from the harshest of critics. The
uncomfortable exchange sees
Wax accompany the controversial
Republican on his private jet as
part of her BBC TV series Ruby’s
American Pie. The pair do not gel.
Despite Trump’s dismissive
responses to her questioning (at
onepointherefusestocontinuethe
interview), Wax persists, following
him to his Taj Mahal Casino in
Atlantic City where he demands
she waits at the door.
“It’s like a comedy routine,”
Trump tells Wax. “You are looking
for laughs and want to make me
look as bad as possible. You are so
obnoxious.”
Reflecting on the experience
11 years on, Wax recognises her
behaviour was manic (“my eyes
were like a wild animal’s”) and
admits that it was, in part, her
own fear of the situation which
prompted Trump’s reactions.
“I let it show that I loathed him
and was judging him the whole
time,” she says. “He smelled what
I was doing pretty quickly. I didn’t
know what I was doing. If I’d just
been curious about him as a
phenomenon, I could have let him
hang himself.”
Since then, Wax’s career has
taken a different path. No longer
defined by brash stand-up comedy
and TV interviews with celebrities
(Wax also interviewed Madonna,
Imelda Marcos and Liza Minnelli – all
with similar results), she has turned
attention to her lifelong fascination
with psychology and how the brain
works, devoting her time to talking
about mental health, mindfulness
and their impact on everyday living.
The science behind
depression
Wax’s own battles with depression
have been well-documented. It was
shortly after the Trump interview
that she was first admitted to
private rehabilitation hospital, The
Priory. Her stays contributed to
much of her subsequent material.
In 2012, she performed her first
show, ‘Losing It’, charting her own
experiences of depression, for a
numberofinstitutionsandcharities.
The following year, Wax gained a
Master’s degree in mindfulness-
based cognitive therapy from the
University of Oxford, to increase
her understanding of the brain and
the science behind her condition.
“I’d always found psychology
interesting, but how it manifests
in the biology of your brain is even
more fascinating,” she says.
This fascination prompted her
to write her book and theatre
show, Sane New World: Taming
the Mind, which she describes as
“an accessible, fascinating insight
intohumanbehaviourandamanual
for understanding how the brain
works”. Through her best-selling
one-woman show, Wax used her
understanding of neuroscience to
As far as our
emotional
development is
concerned, we’re
still swimming
with pond scum
CAREER
Ruby Wax

3. 62
May – July 2016
63
Most people can relax watching
TV, playing football or at a
wine bar with friends. The problem
is that, when you’re about to take
an exam, give a speech in front of
500 people or have an interview for
a job, you can’t whip out a football
or television to calm yourself.
However, if you have practised
mindfulness just before these
nerve-racking challenges, you’ll be
ready to use this portable, three-
minute breather. It travels with you,
wherever you go.
There are three parts to this
exercise; each element lasts a
minute or so.
and deliver better performance,
so it’s in companies’ interests to
support these behaviours.
“Mindfulness is understanding
what mode you’re in, then making
choices either to stay in that mode
or pull back,” she explains.
Whilesheadmitsitcanbetrickyat
first, Wax believes anything can be
changed once you have awareness,
and you can use techniques to alter
your behaviour. “If something’s not
working, we go back to our default
emotions,” she continues. “I know
my fear translates into anger, so if I
sense this fear, I can begin to ‘adjust
my dials’ and that’s mindfulness.
“For example, I thought I was
doing a good job [with the TV
interviews], but when I looked back
at them in the edit suite, I could see
my fear that they weren’t going
to work showing in my face, so
it terrorised [the interviewees]. I
didn’t notice at the time, because
when you’re stressed, you just go
blank. You get a kind of red mist.”
Trigger points
Once you can identify your trigger
points you can start to alter them.
“I would say in my head: ‘shut up,
they are talking, listen to them,’…it
eventually becomes habitual and
you pick up their rhythm, instead
of imposing your own.
“ E x p e r i e n c e h e l p s yo u
pinpoint when you’re going into
fearful mode,” continues Wax.
“Concentrate on who you’re in the
room with – scan yourself before
you go into a stressful situation. If
you yell at yourself, you’ll be more
uptight. With awareness, you can
change your approach.
“There’s such a difference
between talking at people and
talking with them,” she declares.
“People are flattered when you
throw away your notes, see who’s
sitting in front of you and start
Mindfulness has also enabled
Wax to grapple with the stage
fright which plagued her early in
her career. “I wasn’t a good actress
because I was always fearful,” she
says. “But when you find your
terrain, and you know enough
about it, you lose the fear.”
So how does she feel when she
goes on stage today? “I get my
heart beat down before I go on, so I
can’t get thrown. During one show,
a burglar alarm went off. Years ago
I would have fainted, but instead I
just sat and waited for it to stop.”
These days, teaching while being
funny is Wax’s favourite activity,
and her desire to help others is
unwavering. Earlier this year, she
was awarded an OBE for services
to mental health, which she aptly
chose to accept at The Priory. Next
on her agenda is opening public
walk-in centres across the UK –
which she likens to the Alcoholics
Anonymous model – to provide
a place for “frazzled” people to
meet, share experiences and learn
from one another.
She explains: “Everyone knows a
person at home or work who has
been affected by stress. We are
ashamed to have vulnerabilities.
But if we want to stop the stigma,
there’s strength in numbers.”
WhileWaxconfessesshe’s“alittle
sad” she’s no longer gripped by
the persona she worked so hard to
create, losing her fear and getting
to know her own trigger points has
helped her manage her condition.
She still practises mindfulness,
and believes that, in a world where,
by the year 2020, burnout and
depression will be the second
leading cause of death and
disability, it’s time for us all to
take steps towards a more mindful
existence. The key is practice.
“Nothing is automatic – you don’t
go into the gym buff,” she laughs.
“But these exercises are the most
important of all. It’s about learning
how to drive your mind rather than
letting it drive you.”
being curious about them.” If you
tune into what the other person is
talking about, your inner voices will
start to lower. “You’ll start to feel
the communication rather than an
itchiness to get the conversation
over with. It ends up like a game
of tennis rather than a monologue.”
You don’t have to call it a
meeting about mental issues…
say it’s wine tasting!
Ruby’s
three-minute
breathing
exercise
An extract from Ruby Wax’s latest book,
A Mindfulness Guide for the Frazzled
1Widen your focus by
turning every thought
in your mind, inviting
them all in and just
letting them rip: the
good, the bad, the ugly.
After about a minute,
let it go…
2Narrow your focus to
the pinpoint sensation
of breathing. Zoom in
on a full breath through
the nose, throat, chest
or abdomen, feeling
your lungs expanding
on the in-breath and
contracting on the
out-breath. After about
a minute, let it go…
3Widen your focus once
more to your breath
filling your whole body,
from the top of your
head, down through
your body to your toes,
on an inhale and on an
exhale, feeling the
breath empty out like
giant bellows.
Try to take a three-minute breather twice a day, particularly
when you feel that your mind is sizzling from obsessive phone
usage/compulsive emailing, or from some resentment with
which you are burning, to give yourself a break from all the
mind chatter. I promise: after you do it, you’ll feel better.
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Ruby Wax
CAREER
Wellbeing
AMindfulnessGuidefortheFrazzledbyRubyWax,PenguinLife,isoutnow,RRP£14.99