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PRESENTED BY: JACQUELINE L. DeVITO


The Compassionate Friends 2012 National/International Conference
            July 20-22, 2012 Costa Mesa, California
Do not regret growing older.

It is a privilege denied to many.

                     -Unknown
Agenda
•   About Me
•   About My Sister, Jennifer
•   My Journey Through Grief
•   Why We Write During Grief
•   Blogging vs. Journaling
•   Getting Started
Agenda
•   Creating Your Blog
•   Logging Into Your Blog
•   Selecting Your Theme
•   The Dashboard
•   Customizing Your Blog
•   Post vs. Page
Agenda
•   Adding a New Post or Page
•   New Post Via E-Mail
•   Categories and Tags
•   Adding Images
•   Editing an Image
•   Managing Comments
Agenda
•   Publicizing Your Blog Posts
•   What To Blog About
•   Site Stats
•   What’s Next
•   Learn More
•   Keep In Touch
About Jacqueline
• From Dutchess County, NY
• Graduate of UAlbany
• Sister of Alpha Xi Delta (AΞΔ)
• Published in The Quill of Alpha Xi Delta
• Wanted to go to law school, but found
  myself working as a Project Manager for a
  small start-up
• Have always been web savvy
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
About Jennifer
• My younger and only sister
• Passed away at 18; I was 22
• Loss was sudden
• Beautiful, charismatic, always happy
• Was a coach for The Silver Starlites, a
  traveling baton twirling team
• Survived by my parents, my brother and
  myself
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
My Journey Through Grief
• Siblings are the forgotten mourners
• Constantly told to stay strong for my
  family
• Tried two different support groups, but did
  not feel they worked for me
• Gave journaling a try, but spent more time
  decorating it then writing in it
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
My Journey Through Grief
• Started my blog because I would rather
  type my thoughts, than write them
• Started my blog on October 1, 2012, less
  than two months after Jenn’s passing
• Currently have 163 posts, and 43,059
  all-time views
Why We Write During Grief
• There are several similarities between the
  writing process and the grief process. The
  creative element of the writing process
  may allow the bereaved to move on during
  the grief process because writing may
  become a tool for the expression of his or
  her thoughts and feelings, new insights,
  clarification, and reorganization. 1
Why We Write During Grief
• The benefits of writing are first and
  foremost associated with exploratory and
  expressive forms of communication. 1
• Writing is an aid to reflection, a way to
  explore and discover one’s own thoughts
  and feelings. 2, 3, 5, 6
• Writing and forming a story involve
  reflection on events and contribute to self-
                                     6-8
  understanding and new insight.
Why We Write During Grief
• According to process-oriented writing theory,
  language is related to thought. Writing is
  described as a creative process wherein the
  writer may experience new thoughts,
  increased awareness, and knowledge. 1,2,3,4
• Writing down one’s own ideas opens a
  channel that allows a person to become
  acquainted with his or her own thinking
  potential. 2,3,6,7,9
Blogging vs. Journaling
• Journaling requires paper and a pen,
  where blogging requires a computer or
  smart phone
• When journaling, one must think quite
  precisely of what they want to write.
• Once it is written down, it is permanent.
• When blogging, have the ability to delete
  text, add more content, or delete entire
  post
Blogging vs. Journaling
• There is a danger of losing or damaging
  your journal; with blogging you can
  backup and save your posts
• More security with blogging
• Have the ability to keep blog 100% private,
  so only you can read it or add a secure
  password to share with close family and
  friends
Blogging vs. Journaling
• Can add images, YouTube videos, and
  hyperlinks into posts to enhance the
  content
• Ability to go back and add additional
  thoughts or updates to already posted blog
  entries
• Read comments from people who have
  found your blog, and how it has helped
  them; become a virtual mentor
Getting Started
• All you need is an e-mail address
• Many free blog options, as well as paid
  memberships
• WordPress, Blogger, Blog.com, Blogspot, to
  name a few
• Ability to blog from a computer, laptop, tablet,
  e-mail and smart phone
• Preferred CMS: WordPress
Creating Your Blog
• On your PC or Laptop, go to
  wordpress.com
• Click the orange Get started here button
•   Create your blog address
•   Example: coniffdence.wordpress.com
•   Create your username and password
•   Type in your e-mail address
•   Select your language
•   Select the Premium or Free version
•   Click the Create Blog button
•   Check your e-mail inbox for your
    confirmation e-mail
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Logging Into Your Blog
• Can access your blog from anywhere; not
  specific to your own computer
• Open your browser, and go to your site:
  http://www.blog.com
• At the end of your URL, add:
  http://www.blog.com/wp-admin
Logging Into Your Blog
• Type in your email address or username
• Type in your password
• It is case sensitive!
• If you forget your password, click the
  Lost Your password? link and it will be
  reset for you
• Only click Remember Me from your home
  computer
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Selecting Your Theme
• Your theme is the design to your new blog
• Choose a theme that fits your style
• Can always change it
• Some themes are free, while others are
  Premium and require a purchase
• Click Activate for the theme you want
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
The Dashboard
• Overview of your entire blog
• Left sidebar allows you to configure
  settings for your blog
• Quickly access areas where you create
  posts, pages, manage comments, check
  stats and change your blog’s appearance
The Dashboard
Customizing Your Blog
• To set your blog’s title go to
  Settings > General and enter your new Site
  Title
• Can also set your Tagline, Time Zone, and
  date and time formats
• Always click the blue Save Changes button
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Post vs. Page
• A Post is comprised of the day-to-day
  thoughts that make up a blog; allows for
  comments and sharing
• Example: Surviving Our First Holiday
  Season
• A Page is static content where you supply
  information to your readers
• Example: About Me
• Both support images, links and videos
Post vs. Page
• Suggest first creating only a few pages
• Will act as a preface to your blog, and
  outline your individual experience
• After, create posts as often as you
  like/need to fill your blog
• No set schedule; blog when you want
Adding a New Post or Page
• On the left sidebar, click on Posts or Pages
• When you hover over the tab, select Add
  New
• With WordPress, there are multiple ways
  to create a new post or page
• Find which way works best for you
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Adding a New Post or Page
• If you can send an e-mail, you can create a
  page and a post
• Ability to use the Visual setting, or HTML
  code (depending on your preference)
• Can start a blog post, save your work, and
  continue at a later time
• Always have the ability to edit your post,
  even if you published it to your blog
Add New Post or Page
• Add your post’s title
• Add the content of your blog post
• Click Preview to see what your post would
  look like, without publishing it
• When you are ready to share your post
  with the world, click the blue Publish
  button
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
New Post Via E-mail
• Can send an e-mail to your blog, which
  will create a new post and update your
  blog
• Helpful for situations where you can’t
  access your blog, but can still send an
  e-mail
• From the Dashboard, click on My Blogs
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
New Post Via E-mail
• Under Post by Email click on the Enable
  button
New Post Via E-mail
• Now, under Post by Email will be a
  random email address
• Take note of this email address
• Send an email to that address, and it will
  update your blog
• The e-mail subject will become the subject
  of your post
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Categories and Tags
• Used for your posts
• Way to organize your posts for
  manageability
• Example: If you were blogging about your
  first holiday season, your Category may be
  “Family Milestones” and the Tags could
  be: holiday, Christmas, Chanukah, family
  dinner, spirit
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Adding Images
• I always try to add an image into my posts
• Easy to add, and great way to enrich the
  blog
• Helpful when sharing posts on Facebook;
  image will appear in friends’ timelines.
• Can add images into both posts and pages
Adding Images
• Above the toolbar, click on the camera and
  music note icon to the right of Upload/Insert
• When you hover over it, it will say Add Media
• Browse your local computer for the image
  you want to add
• Allowed file types: jpg, jpeg, png, gif, pdf,
  doc, ppt, odt, pptx, docx, pps, ppsx, xls, xlsx.
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Adding Images
• After your image finishes uploading, you
  can edit the image information as much or
  as little as you like
• Give your image a title, alternative text,
  caption and description
• Pick your alignment, and select the perfect
  size
• Make sure you click Insert Into Post
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Editing an Image
• After you have added your image to your
  page or post, you have the ability to edit or
  delete it
• While editing your post, click on the image
  you added
• Two small thumbnail images will appear
  in the top right corner of the image
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Editing an Image
• Click on left thumbnail to edit the image
• Click on the right thumbnail to delete the
  image
• When you click to edit the image, a pop up
  window will appear
• Can scale the image bigger or smaller, change
  alignment, title, and edit the image’s link
• When you are satisfied with your changes,
  click the Update button
Editing an Image
Managing Comments
• Can accept comments on pages and
  posts, but traditionally used just on posts
• Can moderate comments before they are
  shared on your site
• Click Comments on the left sidebar of your
  dashboard
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Managing Comments
• When you approve a comment, it will
  appear at the bottom of your blog for
  others to read
• Can reply to comments
• Ability to trash comments, or mark as
  spam
• Can edit comments to remove private or
  personal information you don’t want to
  share
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Publicizing Your Blog Posts
• Share your blog with friends and family
• Can automatically publish your new blog
  posts to Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin,
  Tumblr, and Yahoo
• On the left sidebar, go to Settings >
  Sharing
• Under each social media outlet, click the
  green Connect to link
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Publicizing Your Blog Posts
• When you publicize, have the option to
  add your own introduction before posting
• With Facebook, when you share your post
  and use an image, it will be featured in
  your update
• Increase chances people will click link,
  versus no image and just text
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
What To Blog About
• Anything you want; no right or wrong
  answer
• Be cautious of using overly personal
  information
• Write what you feel; not what you think
  people want to read
What To Blog About
• A particularly difficult day and what may
  have caused it
• Milestones in your life (birthdays,
  weddings) and how you handled them
• Memories that popped into your head
• Grief surveys
• Lost dreams
• A letter to your loved one
Site Stats
• Keep track of how many people view your
  blog
• See where visitors are coming from
• View what search terms people use to find
  your blog
• Determine how most people find you
• On the left sidebar, click on Site Stats
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
Blogging Your Way Through Grief
What’s Next?
• August 17th will be two years since Jenn’s
  passing
• Would enjoy writing a book that shares my
  personal grief story from the point of view
  of a sibling
• Share my journey in hopes that readers
  identifying with me, and apply feelings
  and emotions to their own journey
Learn More

             My Blog
www.jacquelinedevito.wordpress.com

          WordPress
       www.wordpress.com
Keep In Touch
         Facebook
www.facebook.com/Coniffdence

          Twitter
www.twitter.com/Coniffdence

           E-mail
Jacqueline.DeVito@gmail.com
References
1. Furnes, Bodil, and Elin Dysvik. "A Systematic Writing Program as a Tool in the Grief Process: Part 1." Patient Prefer Adherence 2012 (2012):
425-31. National Center for Biotechnology Information. U.S. National Library of Medicine, 06 Dec. 2010. Web. 19 June 2012.
<http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3003609/>.
2. Elbow P. Writing without Teachers. New York: Oxford University Press; 1973.
3. Elbow P. Writing with Power Techniques for Mastering the Writing Process. New York/Oxford: Oxford University Press; 1981.
4. Vygotsky L. Tænkning og Sprog II. København: H: Reizel; 1982
5. Baikie KA, Wilhelm K. Emotional and physical health benefits of expressive writing. Adv Psychiatr Treat. 2005;11:338–346.
6. Furnes B. Å skrive sorgen – bearbeidelse av sorg. Prosessorientert skriving i møte med en fenomenologisk språkforståelse. En hermeneutisk
fenomenologisk studie av skriving som sorgbearbeidelse hos etterlatte. 2008. Doctoral thesis. University of Bergen, Norway.
7. Pennebaker JW. Telling stories: the health benefits of narrative. Lit Med. 2000;19:3–11.
8. Smyth J, True N, Souto J. Effects of writing about traumatic experiences: the necessity for narrative structuring. J Soc Clin
Psychol. 2001;20:161–172
9. Stensland P. Approaching the Locked Dialogues of the Body – Communicating Symptoms through Illness Diaries. 2003. Doctoral thesis.
Division for General Practice, Department of Public Health and Primary Health Care. University of Bergen, Norway.

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Blogging Your Way Through Grief

  • 1. PRESENTED BY: JACQUELINE L. DeVITO The Compassionate Friends 2012 National/International Conference July 20-22, 2012 Costa Mesa, California
  • 2. Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many. -Unknown
  • 3. Agenda • About Me • About My Sister, Jennifer • My Journey Through Grief • Why We Write During Grief • Blogging vs. Journaling • Getting Started
  • 4. Agenda • Creating Your Blog • Logging Into Your Blog • Selecting Your Theme • The Dashboard • Customizing Your Blog • Post vs. Page
  • 5. Agenda • Adding a New Post or Page • New Post Via E-Mail • Categories and Tags • Adding Images • Editing an Image • Managing Comments
  • 6. Agenda • Publicizing Your Blog Posts • What To Blog About • Site Stats • What’s Next • Learn More • Keep In Touch
  • 7. About Jacqueline • From Dutchess County, NY • Graduate of UAlbany • Sister of Alpha Xi Delta (AΞΔ) • Published in The Quill of Alpha Xi Delta • Wanted to go to law school, but found myself working as a Project Manager for a small start-up • Have always been web savvy
  • 9. About Jennifer • My younger and only sister • Passed away at 18; I was 22 • Loss was sudden • Beautiful, charismatic, always happy • Was a coach for The Silver Starlites, a traveling baton twirling team • Survived by my parents, my brother and myself
  • 11. My Journey Through Grief • Siblings are the forgotten mourners • Constantly told to stay strong for my family • Tried two different support groups, but did not feel they worked for me • Gave journaling a try, but spent more time decorating it then writing in it
  • 13. My Journey Through Grief • Started my blog because I would rather type my thoughts, than write them • Started my blog on October 1, 2012, less than two months after Jenn’s passing • Currently have 163 posts, and 43,059 all-time views
  • 14. Why We Write During Grief • There are several similarities between the writing process and the grief process. The creative element of the writing process may allow the bereaved to move on during the grief process because writing may become a tool for the expression of his or her thoughts and feelings, new insights, clarification, and reorganization. 1
  • 15. Why We Write During Grief • The benefits of writing are first and foremost associated with exploratory and expressive forms of communication. 1 • Writing is an aid to reflection, a way to explore and discover one’s own thoughts and feelings. 2, 3, 5, 6 • Writing and forming a story involve reflection on events and contribute to self- 6-8 understanding and new insight.
  • 16. Why We Write During Grief • According to process-oriented writing theory, language is related to thought. Writing is described as a creative process wherein the writer may experience new thoughts, increased awareness, and knowledge. 1,2,3,4 • Writing down one’s own ideas opens a channel that allows a person to become acquainted with his or her own thinking potential. 2,3,6,7,9
  • 17. Blogging vs. Journaling • Journaling requires paper and a pen, where blogging requires a computer or smart phone • When journaling, one must think quite precisely of what they want to write. • Once it is written down, it is permanent. • When blogging, have the ability to delete text, add more content, or delete entire post
  • 18. Blogging vs. Journaling • There is a danger of losing or damaging your journal; with blogging you can backup and save your posts • More security with blogging • Have the ability to keep blog 100% private, so only you can read it or add a secure password to share with close family and friends
  • 19. Blogging vs. Journaling • Can add images, YouTube videos, and hyperlinks into posts to enhance the content • Ability to go back and add additional thoughts or updates to already posted blog entries • Read comments from people who have found your blog, and how it has helped them; become a virtual mentor
  • 20. Getting Started • All you need is an e-mail address • Many free blog options, as well as paid memberships • WordPress, Blogger, Blog.com, Blogspot, to name a few • Ability to blog from a computer, laptop, tablet, e-mail and smart phone • Preferred CMS: WordPress
  • 21. Creating Your Blog • On your PC or Laptop, go to wordpress.com • Click the orange Get started here button
  • 22. Create your blog address • Example: coniffdence.wordpress.com • Create your username and password • Type in your e-mail address • Select your language • Select the Premium or Free version • Click the Create Blog button • Check your e-mail inbox for your confirmation e-mail
  • 26. Logging Into Your Blog • Can access your blog from anywhere; not specific to your own computer • Open your browser, and go to your site: http://www.blog.com • At the end of your URL, add: http://www.blog.com/wp-admin
  • 27. Logging Into Your Blog • Type in your email address or username • Type in your password • It is case sensitive! • If you forget your password, click the Lost Your password? link and it will be reset for you • Only click Remember Me from your home computer
  • 29. Selecting Your Theme • Your theme is the design to your new blog • Choose a theme that fits your style • Can always change it • Some themes are free, while others are Premium and require a purchase • Click Activate for the theme you want
  • 32. The Dashboard • Overview of your entire blog • Left sidebar allows you to configure settings for your blog • Quickly access areas where you create posts, pages, manage comments, check stats and change your blog’s appearance
  • 34. Customizing Your Blog • To set your blog’s title go to Settings > General and enter your new Site Title • Can also set your Tagline, Time Zone, and date and time formats • Always click the blue Save Changes button
  • 36. Post vs. Page • A Post is comprised of the day-to-day thoughts that make up a blog; allows for comments and sharing • Example: Surviving Our First Holiday Season • A Page is static content where you supply information to your readers • Example: About Me • Both support images, links and videos
  • 37. Post vs. Page • Suggest first creating only a few pages • Will act as a preface to your blog, and outline your individual experience • After, create posts as often as you like/need to fill your blog • No set schedule; blog when you want
  • 38. Adding a New Post or Page • On the left sidebar, click on Posts or Pages • When you hover over the tab, select Add New • With WordPress, there are multiple ways to create a new post or page • Find which way works best for you
  • 40. Adding a New Post or Page • If you can send an e-mail, you can create a page and a post • Ability to use the Visual setting, or HTML code (depending on your preference) • Can start a blog post, save your work, and continue at a later time • Always have the ability to edit your post, even if you published it to your blog
  • 41. Add New Post or Page • Add your post’s title • Add the content of your blog post • Click Preview to see what your post would look like, without publishing it • When you are ready to share your post with the world, click the blue Publish button
  • 44. New Post Via E-mail • Can send an e-mail to your blog, which will create a new post and update your blog • Helpful for situations where you can’t access your blog, but can still send an e-mail • From the Dashboard, click on My Blogs
  • 46. New Post Via E-mail • Under Post by Email click on the Enable button
  • 47. New Post Via E-mail • Now, under Post by Email will be a random email address • Take note of this email address • Send an email to that address, and it will update your blog • The e-mail subject will become the subject of your post
  • 49. Categories and Tags • Used for your posts • Way to organize your posts for manageability • Example: If you were blogging about your first holiday season, your Category may be “Family Milestones” and the Tags could be: holiday, Christmas, Chanukah, family dinner, spirit
  • 51. Adding Images • I always try to add an image into my posts • Easy to add, and great way to enrich the blog • Helpful when sharing posts on Facebook; image will appear in friends’ timelines. • Can add images into both posts and pages
  • 52. Adding Images • Above the toolbar, click on the camera and music note icon to the right of Upload/Insert • When you hover over it, it will say Add Media • Browse your local computer for the image you want to add • Allowed file types: jpg, jpeg, png, gif, pdf, doc, ppt, odt, pptx, docx, pps, ppsx, xls, xlsx.
  • 56. Adding Images • After your image finishes uploading, you can edit the image information as much or as little as you like • Give your image a title, alternative text, caption and description • Pick your alignment, and select the perfect size • Make sure you click Insert Into Post
  • 59. Editing an Image • After you have added your image to your page or post, you have the ability to edit or delete it • While editing your post, click on the image you added • Two small thumbnail images will appear in the top right corner of the image
  • 61. Editing an Image • Click on left thumbnail to edit the image • Click on the right thumbnail to delete the image • When you click to edit the image, a pop up window will appear • Can scale the image bigger or smaller, change alignment, title, and edit the image’s link • When you are satisfied with your changes, click the Update button
  • 63. Managing Comments • Can accept comments on pages and posts, but traditionally used just on posts • Can moderate comments before they are shared on your site • Click Comments on the left sidebar of your dashboard
  • 66. Managing Comments • When you approve a comment, it will appear at the bottom of your blog for others to read • Can reply to comments • Ability to trash comments, or mark as spam • Can edit comments to remove private or personal information you don’t want to share
  • 68. Publicizing Your Blog Posts • Share your blog with friends and family • Can automatically publish your new blog posts to Facebook, Twitter, Linkedin, Tumblr, and Yahoo • On the left sidebar, go to Settings > Sharing • Under each social media outlet, click the green Connect to link
  • 71. Publicizing Your Blog Posts • When you publicize, have the option to add your own introduction before posting • With Facebook, when you share your post and use an image, it will be featured in your update • Increase chances people will click link, versus no image and just text
  • 74. What To Blog About • Anything you want; no right or wrong answer • Be cautious of using overly personal information • Write what you feel; not what you think people want to read
  • 75. What To Blog About • A particularly difficult day and what may have caused it • Milestones in your life (birthdays, weddings) and how you handled them • Memories that popped into your head • Grief surveys • Lost dreams • A letter to your loved one
  • 76. Site Stats • Keep track of how many people view your blog • See where visitors are coming from • View what search terms people use to find your blog • Determine how most people find you • On the left sidebar, click on Site Stats
  • 80. What’s Next? • August 17th will be two years since Jenn’s passing • Would enjoy writing a book that shares my personal grief story from the point of view of a sibling • Share my journey in hopes that readers identifying with me, and apply feelings and emotions to their own journey
  • 81. Learn More My Blog www.jacquelinedevito.wordpress.com WordPress www.wordpress.com
  • 82. Keep In Touch Facebook www.facebook.com/Coniffdence Twitter www.twitter.com/Coniffdence E-mail Jacqueline.DeVito@gmail.com
  • 83. References 1. Furnes, Bodil, and Elin Dysvik. "A Systematic Writing Program as a Tool in the Grief Process: Part 1." Patient Prefer Adherence 2012 (2012): 425-31. National Center for Biotechnology Information. U.S. National Library of Medicine, 06 Dec. 2010. Web. 19 June 2012. <http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3003609/>. 2. Elbow P. Writing without Teachers. New York: Oxford University Press; 1973. 3. Elbow P. Writing with Power Techniques for Mastering the Writing Process. New York/Oxford: Oxford University Press; 1981. 4. Vygotsky L. Tænkning og Sprog II. København: H: Reizel; 1982 5. Baikie KA, Wilhelm K. Emotional and physical health benefits of expressive writing. Adv Psychiatr Treat. 2005;11:338–346. 6. Furnes B. Å skrive sorgen – bearbeidelse av sorg. Prosessorientert skriving i møte med en fenomenologisk språkforståelse. En hermeneutisk fenomenologisk studie av skriving som sorgbearbeidelse hos etterlatte. 2008. Doctoral thesis. University of Bergen, Norway. 7. Pennebaker JW. Telling stories: the health benefits of narrative. Lit Med. 2000;19:3–11. 8. Smyth J, True N, Souto J. Effects of writing about traumatic experiences: the necessity for narrative structuring. J Soc Clin Psychol. 2001;20:161–172 9. Stensland P. Approaching the Locked Dialogues of the Body – Communicating Symptoms through Illness Diaries. 2003. Doctoral thesis. Division for General Practice, Department of Public Health and Primary Health Care. University of Bergen, Norway.