Halloween Jokes

How do monsters tell their future? Th ey read their horror scope...

Why don't skeletons ever go out on the town? Because they don't have any body to go out with...

What is a vampire's favorite holiday? Fangs giving...

What is Dracula's favorite kind of coffee? De coffin ated...

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes? A cereal killer...

What kind of streets do zombies like the best? Dead ends...

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant? A stake sandwich...

Why do vampires need mouthwash? They have bat breath...

Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal? He heard it had great circulation...

Why wasn't the vampire working? He was on a coffin break...

What do skeletons say before eating? Bone Appétit...

What kind of spirits serve food on a plane? Airline ghost esses...

Why did the skeleton climb a tree? Because a dog was after its bones ...

Where do ghosts go swimming? The dead sea...

What is a vampire's favorite ice cream flavor? Vein illa...

Why isn't Dracula invited to many Halloween parties? Because he's a pain in the neck...

Who is a skeleton's favorite emperor? Napoleon Bone aparte...

Why did the vampires cancel their baseball game? They couldn't find their bats ...

What did the skeleton say to the bartender? I'll have two beers and a mop ...

To be continued...