Working together after an affair that your spouse had involved avoiding certain pitfalls. It is no easy task and takes effort on both your parts, but it can be made easier by knowing these potential roadblocks on the way to repairing your marriage after an affair.
Working Together After an Affair - You Need to Avoid This Pitfall
1. Working Together After an Affair - You Need to
Avoid This Pitfall
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Working together after an affair that your spouse had involved avoiding certain pitfalls.
It is no easy task and takes effort on both your parts, but it can be made easier by
knowing these potential roadblocks on the way to repairing your marriage after an
affair.
As the victim of the affair, there is one pitfall in particular that needs to be avoided at
all costs. We will take a closer look at that and others as you read further.
2. Working as a Couple After an Affair
If you have decided to salvage your marriage after an affair instead of pursuing a
divorce, you will need the help and full reciprocation of your spouse to be successful.
The good news is that together you CAN indeed save your marriage and recover from
this ordeal.
Discovering that your spouse had an affair creates unprecedented emotional turmoil.
The initial shock of the news is one of the most devastating feelings that a person can
experience. This is often closely followed by a range of other emotions: shame, anger,
embarrassment, betrayal, jealousy, anguish, and uncertainty are just a sampling.
It’s one of these emotions that is most likely to stick with you and become a pitfall as
you work to repair the damage done to your trust and relationship. That emotion is
anger.
3. Anger, of course, tends to be a natural reaction when learning that your spouse has
had an affair. It is normal to experience this emotion and even feel led to a degree to
seek some form of revenge for the betrayal by your spouse.
As you and your spouse work to restore things between you, you are going to find
that even as things are making steady progress, anger will rear its head now and then.
It may even appear when you think things are going just fine. This is natural, but you
will find as time moves on your anger will diminish and become less and less frequent
and lessen in intensity. It is important to understand at this point that anger will be an
emotion that is present, especially early on in your recovery from the affair.
4. So What Exactly is the Pitfall to Avoid?
As I mentioned, you emotions immediately after an affair will be particularly raw and
acute and the temptation will be there to blow up at your spouse. You may want to
punish them for the pain that they have inflicted upon you with their infidelity. You
may have already done so previous to reading this. This reaction is normal.
It is also the pitfall you need to avoid when working with your spouse after an affair.
These outbursts of anger, although they may make you feel better, will put up a
roadblock when trying to recover from the affair. It is often the case that the person
who had the outburst tends to feel bad about it later on and the last thing you need
right now is to feel any worse than you already do.
5. You need to understand a couple of things about anger to help you manage this
emotion and successfully work with your spouse after an affair. First, understand that
anger is simply a feeling. Having an angry outburst is an action dictated by the
emotion. Thus acting out on that emotion is ultimately a choice.
Anger is not the easiest emotion to control but it can be done. When you feel it
welling up between you and your spouse, the best thing you can do is take time out.
Leave the room, go take a walk, something that gets you away from your spouse for
whatever period of time it takes for you to calm down. Explain to your spouse that
you are willing to continue the conversation, but at the moment you need some
space.
6. Avoiding the pitfall of angry outbursts is truly just one step when working together
after an affair. However, to fully restore your marriage and recover from the affair, I
strongly recommend for you to download this FREE course from Dr. Frank Gunzburg.
Click here now for instant access.
Taylor Ranidae is passionate about love and relationships and writes
articles focusing on helping people save their relationships and marriages.
Her articles are a must read for anyone who is looking to either salvage or
further enhance their relationship.
7. Avoiding the pitfall of angry outbursts is truly just one step when working together
after an affair. However, to fully restore your marriage and recover from the affair, I
strongly recommend for you to download this FREE course from Dr. Frank Gunzburg.
Click here now for instant access.
Taylor Ranidae is passionate about love and relationships and writes
articles focusing on helping people save their relationships and marriages.
Her articles are a must read for anyone who is looking to either salvage or
further enhance their relationship.