Funny and Real- helpful to the employer and the employee

1. Poll: Most Annoying Office HabitsSource: rediff.com Prof. RafathRazia

2. most annoying office habits Many of us spend more time in our offices than we spend at home Our colleagues form a more integral part of our lives than our spouses ever will Some of us have worked with and known our colleagues for longer than we've known our spouses That really does say something about a workplace doesn't it? It won't be unfair to say that little things our co-workers do probably tick us off more than what our partners do at home So here's a list of the most annoying office habits that make us want to kill our colleagues:

4. The idea of having a bath, shaving or wearing clean clothes seems plain alien to them

5. All they know is that they must report to work irrespective of whether they've bathed, shaved or brushed their teeth

6. It doesn't matter to them if there's a meeting with the CEO or an important bunch of clients are coming over to discuss an important deal

8. But universe has a way of balancing things out

9. So on the other end of the spectrum, are those who survive because of the madness without the method

10. The less we speak about their desks the better -- cluttered, messy and always in a state of complete chaos!

11. Don't be surprised if you happen to find a week-old salad somewhere beneath those piles of papers and junk

12. Be gladWe can assure you that somewhere in there will be a piece of pizza that was ordered last Diwali. Untidy desks

14. The thing with an incessant flirt is that he doesn't get it at all

15. She may be giving him the coldest of the vibes but that won't make a difference to him

18. Despite his annoying habits, no real flirt will ever say anything nasty to any woman

19. It's simply not in his nature -- being nasty to a woman or sexist doesn't fit into his scheme of things

21. Try explaining that you need to work and he'll probably just give you a why-the-hell-are-you-disturbing-me look, roll his eyes and continue talking anyway, without any change in his pitch or volume

24. Or else the techies who like to believe they're writing poetry in the binary language.

25. Whether anyone is getting disturbed or not is quite simply not their concern

26. The hitch with both these characters is that neither seems to be aware of the technological advancement in hardware

28. The colourful paper clips, post its and freshly sharpened pencils do kinda add some personality to the desk, don't they?

29. Then of course the stationery pincher makes his appearance

30. In the middle of the night, when the last of the lights has been turned off and the security is done with his last round of the day, the stationery pincher emerges from his hiding

31. And before you know it, when you clock in the next morning it's gone -- first the stapler, then that lovely note pad, followed by the pens -- of all four colours, even the whiteboard marker and finally the pen stand!

33. Looking at the urgency on your colleague's face you take pity on him and hand out that last currency note in your wallet

34. Sounds familiar?

35. Yup! That's Mr/Ms Borrow-and-forget!

36. What these folks don't understand that the very idea of 'borrowing' involves 'returning' what they've taken and not presuming that it is theirs for the keeping!

37. Now they may not be doing this on purpose but it is, as many of you would admit, quite irritating indeed

39. All official emails that need your boss to be in the know should be marked to him/her

40. The operative phrase here being 'need to know'!

41. Imagine writing off an email to the invisible admin guy in the other end of the office about, let's say, the flickering tube light over your head and marking your boss on it

42. Or then pointing out a spelling mistake in the 243'd slide of a 372-slide presentation your colleague's made AND CC-ing your boss on it

43. Irritating enough? Get the point

44. So you see the boss doesn't always need to know everything

45. In fact the lesser he knows the better it will be for you no?Cc-ingyour boss on EVERY single email

47. No amount of dirty looks you give such folks, this breed of people will never, ever get the point

50. "Today her sister got admitted too!"

51. "My mum fell down and broke her little toe"

52. "So did my sister!"

53. You get the drift right?

54. Really, there only can be so many relatives one can bump off and injure to bunk work

55. It's not like we don't understand what you're up to

57. But there's a place and time, right?

59. After a good 15-minute talk about Athamma, her family, your cousin and her girlfriend/boyfriend (who as it turns out is the bone of contention) you turn around and see your colleague staring right at you and without so much blinking an eyelid launches off: "I had the same problem "

61. Make the mistake of saying something innocuous and bam! Your colleague will tell you what a fool you are and what a terrible idea it was to do whatever you did

63. We can assure you from personal experience that men indulge in as much office gossip as the women

65. Everyone's having a great time, letting their hair down and you finally get the chance to chat up that hottie from marketing you've been eyeing for the last s-e-v-e-n months

66. The sad part -- and it's really sad we think -- are those who get drunk

67. Of course we do find the drunk men who dance on tables immensely funny but the ones who start hitting on women about two pegs down are the ones who deserve to smacked in the faceGetting drunk at office parties

69. Imagine you turn around to ask your colleague to take over something from you or ask him/her about the email you'd forwarded some two hours ago and you find yourself talking to an empty chair!

70. Half hour later you turn around again and the chair's empty again and mysteriously stays that way every time you have some work with this particular colleague

71. Turns out the only time you can catch him is when s/he takes that smoke/chai break, which is basically once every 20 minutesTaking smoke/coffee breaks

73. Sure we've come across bosses who like to have their minions do every single thing and scoot off home at the stroke of six

74. The worse though are those who insist on having everything their way.

75. So even if they do assign you a task, they'll probably spend 20 minutes telling you just how you should do it, follow it up with the same long list of instructions via email and then finally a telephone call where you'll get to hear about it all over again before of course being told how you didn't get it right

77. Useless Incompetent Bosses

78. Treating Meetings as Work

79. Region based groupism, grouping based on region/place and then talk in the regional language in front of the folks who do not understand it, and talk that way deliberately

80. Being rude, impolite and arrogant

81. HR behaving as if they are Gods gift to the company

82. People wagging their tales full speed to impress bosses, losing all dignity.

83. And bosses championing such d..0gs

84. Beautiful girls, behaving as if they are Gods gift to the world :)

85. Talking about family, wife, kids at work

86. Not working, doing everything else including visiting rediff:)

87. Scratching self at wrong body parts at wrong times

88. Releasing bad gas with loud noise.