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Caring for A Mom at Home: Remember Her Emotional Needs
1. Caring for A Mom at Home: Remember Her Emotional Needs
You may remember my sister Cindy,
but when you do not, enable me to
give you a simple outline: My sister
owned a very successful material-
managing business for many years,
but she gave it up to care for our
parents in their later years. The time
was appropriate for our parents as
well as my sister certainly needed her.
Along the way, Cindy gained much
insight.
I'd like to talk about a little but vital
part of the penetration Cindy
comprehended while caring for our
mom -- the need for focusing on the
mental requirements of the aging
parent/patient, and never letting the
need for "physical attention" to
become your complete relationship.
When you read Cindy's comments below, I suggest that you seek assistance should you get
consumed together with the "physical caring" only and missing the opportunity to totally benefit
from the emotional and relationship needs of your loved one.
While caring for my very ill Mommy in the last years of her life, she was bed bound and completely
reliant. Due to difficulties in coming off the ventilator while in the hospital, she was sent home using
a tracheotomy that she continued to live with. She had a feeding tube for nutritional support and of
course, she had a urinary catheter. The wide-ranging quantity of care that had to be delivered to
Mom every day was overwhelming sometimes. It was important to keep catheter website the
tracheotomy site, and also the feeding tube website really clean to prevent disease. Along with
bathing and changing her continuously, it was quite a busy 24 hours for me personally.
But there was something I tended to forget. When you are so focused on a your loved one's attention
and ensuring you get it right, you can occasionally forget about the psychological needs of your
loved one. Here are a few things I learned:
Be sure their room is light with a lot of keepsakes near. Try and reminisce about the importance of a
particular keepsake with them and let them tell you stories of its significance.
When possible, have their bed near a window so they can look out. My mom loved birds and the
squirrels we fed outside her window. Place pictures of their preferred scenes in their own field of
vision if no window is available.
Listen for their history. My mom particularly liked me to listen to her talk about her service in
2. watching VHS movies about the war with her and WWII as a Morse code operator.
Take time for beauty! I learned to spend additional hours brushing my mom's hair, applying the
lotions she loved, and filing her nails.
Quit and spend time together. Occasionally my mother just needed me to sit with her and hold her
hand. She adored me reading to her until she fell asleep.
Toward the end of Mom's time she said to me, "Please hug me, no one has embraced me lately." It
broke my heart to believe I'd missed this very special part of her care. With all the daily work that
was ongoing to make sure her physical care was finished, I had forgotten among the most important
elements of care giving - spending mother and loving -daughter time with my Mom.
If you find yourself in a situation such as this, where you are administering physical attention that is
so much that there doesn't appear to be hours or energy left to stop and spend time with your loved
one, please seek help. Being a caregiver can be demanding. There are caregiver services which can
allow you that time you and your loved one really need so you may be a daughter again.
Private Home Care