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1. Encountering conflict The ways we attempt to resolve conflict define who we are VATE Trial exam 2011

2. General comments Very few students took the time to break down this topic and identify the big ideas Very little planning was evident Some planning focused on examples to use not on the concepts or ideas to explore – this IS a problem. The task is about writing on a concept not listing examples that reflect an idea.

3. Dive into the prompt Focus on one text – do not indicate both on the cover – the first will be assumed as the one Get cover details right Paraphrase the prompt – do not simply copy it – put it into your own words – and remember it is your diving board: look for the concept or idea in the prompt you wish to write about – you do not need to address all of it. Examiners are looking for good writing, not an answer to the question.

4. What are the elements of good writing? Engaging the reader Interesting Well structured so the reader can easily decipher the form and purpose Knows how to play the audience Has a voice Is genuine, passionate, believable, knowledgable Publishable; Realistic Accurate in reference to facts and events Not based on stereotypes and generalisations

5. Do these openings gain reader interest-Discuss each one ‘Conflict is a way of life. It is all around us. It is in us and we can be the cause of it. ‘ ‘It can be said that we are defined by our values, beliefs, our upbringing and life experience, or the experiences of those very close to us.’ ‘The ways we attempt to resolve conflict defines who we are, individually.’

6. cont In times of trouble our actions towards fixing a problem illustrate who we are as a whole. It can often be believed our actions and processes taken when attempting to resolve matters of conflict express details of our individuality. Every human being experiences conflict throughout their life. Conflict is resolved in many ways and in many ways it defines who we are.

7. cont A dark night’s sky, a slight ocean wind, a boat dock barely lit by the light of the moon, stars and three failing lanterns. Who are we? Who are you? Do you know who you are? Society places so much on the idea that experiences shape who we are and what we are going to become. Surely we can not place it all down to one encounter to shape us.

8. cont In The rugmaker of mazar e sharifby Najaf Mazari and Robert Hillman Najaf faces many conflict situations whether they be internal or external Najaf is able to overcome these conflicts. The current debate regarding asylum seekers, refugees, ‘boat people’ and queue-jumpers lead by our nation so-called leaders, is relevant to the Australian Society and who we are.

9. cont Confrontations are something that most human beings have to deal with on a day to day basis. While the Taliban attempts to resolve conflict reflect the abhorrent and maliciously violent nature of their counterparts the same cannot be said for Najaf Mazari, co-author of The rugmaker of mazar e sharifwho shows that his gentle nature and religious faith helped him through hard times and defines him to be the inspiration that he is.

10. cont Nelson Mandela, Adolf Hitler, Najaf Mazari and Oprah Winfrey. What is the difference between these four people?

11. Topic sentences Consider this: Gill hicks, a survivor of the London bombings encountered conflict on many different levels. Should an example ‘be’ the topic sentence? Or should the concept under discussion be the topic sentence?

12. Avoid sweeping generalisations Americas response to this attack was to go over to Iraq and Afghanistan, the countries where the Taliban were from, find Osama Bin Laden and capture him. …the lady who wrote the music notes for Adrian’s vocal orchestra.

13. Text use Use specific and appropriate examples from the texts, do not summarise them or simply show how they link to or illustrate an idea in the prompt.

14. Planning: Plan responses to the concepts and ideas, not the examples you are going to use. Plan Form audience and purpose – Letter, essay, journal, article, blog, speech etc Write down who the audience is before you begin – this will help direct your writing Have a central BIG IDEA for you writing – which MUST come from the concepts in the prompt.

15. Planning continued If you intend to write a story plan your character, your plot conflict (beginning rising action, climax, denouement) , setting and theme; Know where you are going with it. If you intend to write a letter set it out as a letter cluing the reader in to who is in the exchange and the context – date and place If you intend to produce an essay plan the topic sentences – the what you think and why – then consider examples that will support these ideas, not the other way around. If planning a persuasive response develop a contention clearly in your own words, develop specific supporting reasons for your contention – then add in the examples to support your idea.

16. For story writers Dialogue and punctuation mattersFind the errors and corrections needed here to imrpove the clarity: ‘Hey you, you, have the money yes?’ a shady man in worn out clothes asks. ‘Yes all three thousand, that is enough for me and my family to cross into Australia?’ A tall middle eastern man responds with 3 young boys and a woman standing behind him. ‘…I must get on that boat with my family.” The middle eastern man now pleads. …”you will pay one thousand each , you leave two behind or no go.’ The shady man again reinforces.

17. Why doesn’t this work? Facebook seems to have taken over society and presents many different conflicts, both internal and external that contribute to who people are and labels them in ways that are not necessarily accurate. These labels externally define who we are and paints people as one sided. Facebook in my opinion fails to see every aspect of people yet is used by people to categorise individuals and define who they are. (it continued with an example)

18. May I be indulged? May I read Tyler’s opinion piece? May I read Grace’s Letters?