1. Kanjoos Makkhi Choos ..........!!
Kanjoos: Yeh kaila(banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Kanjoos: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Kanjoos:Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de
************ ********* ********* *********
A Kanjoos on his death time.
My wife, where r u ?
Wife:Yes, Im here
My sons & daughters ru all here?
Yes, Papa
Kanjoos:To phir baju wale kamre
ka pankha Q khula hay
************ ********* ********* *********
1 Kanjoos 14th floor se neche gira
Girte waqt usne apni ghar ki khirki me
apni wife ko roti pakate hue dekha
to chilla k bola
MERI ROTI NAHI PAKANA!
************ ********* ********* ********
Kanjoos ne arbi ko khoon dey k uski jaan bachai.
Arbi ne usay MERCEDES gift kardi.
Arbi ko phir khoon ki zarorut pari,
Kanjoos ne phir khoon dia.
Ab k bar Arbi ne till waly laddu gift kiye,
Kanjoos:Ghusse se, mercedez kion nahi di?
Arbi:Munna!!
Ab hamarey ander bhi Kanjoos ka khoon dor raha hay
************ ********* ********* *******

2. A Kanjoos called a newspaper office and asked: Mera Baap Mar gaya hai,
kya charges hongay?
NewsPaper: Rs.50 per word.
Kanjoos: Oh bohat ziyada hain, Acha likho "Sohan Bhai Died".
Newspaper: Sir! It should be minimum 6 words!
Kanjoos: Oh ho! Jara sochnay do..... Acha likho....... ......... .
Sohan Bhai Died - Suzuki for Sale .
************ ********* ********* ******
Kanjoos ask to Taxi Driver: Abdullah Shah Ghazi k mazaar jao gay?
Taxi Driver: Han jaon ga.
Kanjoos ne jaib se shopper nikala or kaha:
Wapsi main langar ki biryani lete aana.
************ ********* ********* ********* *
Shadi me 1 Kanjoos bahut der tk khata raha,
Kse ne pocha bhae kb tk khaty rhogy?
Kanjoos: Yaar me khud kha kha k thak gya hun pr kya karoon card me likha
tha "Dinner 7 to 10pm
************ ********* ********* ********* ***
Kanjoos to dukandar: Yaar zara toothbrush dena mere brush ka 1 baal
toot gaya hai
Dukandar: 1 baal toota to naya q le rahe ho
Kanjoos: jo toota hai woh akhri tha.
************ ********* ********* *******
Titanic K Sath Kanjoos Bhi Doob Raha Tha
Aur Hans Bhi Raha Tha
Dost:
Oye Hans Kyun Raha Hai?
Kanjoos:

3. Shukar Hai Main Ne Return Ticket Nahi Khareeda
************ ********* ********* ********
Kanjus Baap Baccho Se - Jo Raat Ko Khana Nahi Khayga Use 5/Rs Dunga.
Bacche 5/Rs Le Kar So Gaye.
Subah Baap Bola- Jo 5/Rs Dega Usi Ko Nasta Milega
************ ********* ********* ********
Mere Kitne SMS mile?
Bahut saare?
Aur tune kitne bheje? Ek bhi nahi!
Haaak Thu: Ab tak bahut SMS khaye - Ab Goli Kha -
DHISHKYOUN!
************ ********* ********* ********
CONGRATS" U have been awarded an M.B.A degree
For not Smsing me.
MBA means 'Member of Bhikari Association'
Kindly forward it 2 all M.B.A's.
************ ********* ********* ********
Phone ek Mandhir,
Sms uska Bhagwan,
Sms bhejne wala Pujari,
Sms padhne wala Bhakt,
Padhkar sms na karne wala

4. Mandir ke baahar ka Bhikhari.
************ ********* ********* *********
25 25 25
25 25 25
25 25 25
25 25 25 loot-loo! chwaniya hai,
Mujhe sms karne ke kaam aayengi.
Sharmao mat.
************ ********* ********* *********
Na Hoga Kanjus Tumsa ZamaneMe ,1 umar GuzarGayi Tumko Samjane
Me Kabi 1sms hi karde o zalim kanjus, Laga Rehta He paisa Bachane
Me
************ ********* ********* *********
Zid apni na chhodi
Aur pyar bhara dil tod diya
Kuchh paiso k liye zaalim
Tumne sms karna chhod diya
************ ********* ********* *********
MANGO ka juice, CHIKU ka juice, ORANGE ka juice, TETI ka juice,
APPLE ka juice, PINEPLE ka juice, PAPITA ka juice,

5. GRAP ka juice...
Jo MSG na kare vo KANJUS..!
************ ********* ********* *********
Jis tarah 1 machar ko marne se
tum shikari nahin ban jao gey
.
.
.
.
.
Theek usi tarah 2-3 SMS karney se
tum bhikari nahin ban jaoge !!!
************ ********* ********* *********
Ab To Iqrar Karlo Or Na Tadpao Ab To Bata Do Or Na Sharmao Are
BolB Do Ki.. Aap Humse Bhi Zyada Kanjus Ho, SMS karne Me
************ ********* ********* *********
Sms B Bade Kamal Ki Cheez Hai 20 Gadho Ko Sms Karo 10 Padte Hai
5 Ko Smjh Me Aata Hai 4 To Kanjus Hote Hai1Murga Kismat Se
Fasta He Jo Reply Karta Hai.

6. ************ ********* ********* *********
Aey mere SMS mere dost ke pass jana,
Agar wo so raha ho to shor mat machana,
Jab wo jage to dhire se 'Muskarana',
Phir kehna "KANJUS" SMS karo!
************ ********* ********* *********
1 Glass Pani Lo
us Me Neem K ped Ka Phul Dalo
2Ghante K Liye Rakh Do
Phir Dus Min. Garam Kar K Thanda Karne K Bad Pi Lo
Kanjusi K Keede Mar Jayenge.Fir sms krna
************ ********* ********* *********
Jab Bhi Kanjusi Ka Oscar Ka Nomination Aayega,
Tumhara Naam Bhi Usme Zarur Aayega,
Agar Ye Padkar Bhi Tumne Reply Nahi Kiya,
To Pehla Prize Bhi Tumhe Mil Jaayega
************ ********* ********* *********
Chandi ka ghoda sone ki lagam msg pdnewalo ko mera salam.Tea pepsi
pinewalo kbhi pani b piya kro,fokat k msg pdnewalo kbhi msg b kiya
kro.
************ ********* ********* *********

7. Best one - Kanjoos ki zindagi kya jeena, kabhi humari tarah bhi jiya
karo,
Roz mere sms padh kar sharam nahi aati, kabhi khud bhi SMS kiya
karo.
************ ********* ********* *********
--Ab kuch hindi main--
जल ,
,
एक ,
उस महल .
************ ********* ********* *********