The Emotional Dynamics ABS

Raising Children with Special Needs Presenter: Lydia Abrams, LCSW Tikvah Special Needs Program Coordinator Tampa Jewish Family Services www.tjfs.org

[object Object],[object Object],Learning Objectives:

This presentation does not reflect the experiences of all parents/primary caregivers of children with special needs. Each family unit and every family member experiences the impacts of raising a child with special needs in their own unique way.

Every Child is an Individual Each Parents’ Experience is Unique Some Families May Have Similarities but None are the Same

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[object Object],[object Object],Some families prefer the word “Disability”; some prefer the words “Special Needs”; some prefer the individual’s diagnosis; some just prefer the child’s name

Family plans prior to birth of child: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Upon initial diagnosis of a child with special needs, most families have begun a journey…. They will experience various emotions… And will hopefully learn how to cope with the unexpected changes in their lives.

Feelings of Grief/Loss: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

What are parents/caregivers grieving for? “ The day my child was born, was the day I lost my innocence.” - You Will Dream New Dreams ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feelings of Anger ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feelings of Guilt: Unable to protect child Child’s suffering “ What did I do to cause this?” “ How could I have prevented this?” Less attention toward other children Loss of intimacy with partner Less focus on personal needs

[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Feelings of Isolation:

Decreased Confidence: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Fear / Worry: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feeling Overwhelmed: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feelings of Detachment: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feelings of Relief: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Other Stressors: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Role Changes ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Can forget that they are the parent of their child first Parents/primary caregivers can unexpectedly become… … For their child

“ Roller Coaster Ride” ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Extended Family Members Other Committ- ments Therapies Finances Careers Schools Medications Hospitals/ Clinics/ Labs Community Accomodations Insurance Companies Early Steps Or Related Programs Specialized Equipments Case Worker Specialized Physician(s) Primary Pediatrian Spouse Other Children Child/ren With Special Needs Parents/ Primary Caregivers

Gaining Acceptance/Coping Skills ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Find Balance: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Read: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Acknowledge Positive Aspects of Child and Life: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Love Child for the Person He/She is: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Other Ways to Gain Acceptance/Coping Skills: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Patience: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Forgiveness: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Letting Go:

Writing as a form of Healing: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Feelings of Acceptance may Come and Go Some may never accept situation; but may learn to cope “ It is the journey that counts – not the destination.” - You Will Dream New Dreams

If the parents’ emotional needs are met – then they can better care for their children

Many Parents/Primary Caregivers Benefit From Professionals Who Practice: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],Parents/Caregivers and Professionals are a team that are working toward the best interest of the child

Empathy: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Empathy Exercise: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Helpful things for professionals ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],to say:

Tips For Professionals: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

More Tips: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Core Services That Can Assist Families: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

“ Who Are The People In Your Neighborhood?” ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],*Networking is vital for learning about resources in your community*

“ What if the shoe doesn’t fit?” ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

When should parents/caregivers seek counseling? ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],“ Taking care of yourself is important to you….and your child” - specialparentsupport.com

Parental Counseling: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Empowering Parents/Primary Caregivers Parents/caregivers are capable of making decisions that work for their families Higher self-confidence can lead to positive parenting “ Walk life’s path with gentle footsteps” -Flavia

“ Stuff happens, people do the best they can, and very often they learn and grow thereby.” - Louise Rachel, Mothering

Online Resources: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

More Online Resources: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Special Needs Definitions/Information: ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

http://specialchildren.about.com/od/needinspiration/ig/Notes-of-Encouragement/

Recommended Books ,[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object],[object Object]

Disclaimer: ,[object Object],[object Object]

The Emotional Dynamics ABS

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The Emotional Dynamics ABS